₦airaland Forum

ednut1:
u and i know in 9ja when a women is dependent on the husband she goes no where. If she is not dependent its like 60:40. In favour of staying. Men and women have beem cheating since time immemorial. It won't stop

Rozz:
what makes you think I'm a small pikin?See the way you men are trying to justify cheating.I am better than those people you mentioned in my own way , it all depends on what we want out of life as an individual

ednut1:
small pikin dey worry this one. As if she better pass Hillary Clinton, Beyonce, ex oyo first lady whose husband's all cheated and they no gree divorce. Small pikin who thinks life and marriage revolves around cheating lol

crackkhaus:
You bruv, are a sage with experience.
Got a few acquaintances and mentors I get to hang around with from time to time and one thing you will never hear a man who has spent at least 15yrs in marriage talking about is LOVE.

Love is a function of the heart, smarts is a function of the brain.
The two don't go together in any form, one must take a back seat.

Provision, protection, supervision, taking charge - these are things men understand. Just add personal principles and strong morals regarding what is right and wrong, and every woman has herself a perfect man.

Leave love to the women.

Tosinayoko:
You never loved him...

emmaodet:
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At the bolded, Exactly bro.
If your wife is bringing 40% and above to the marriage, then you must be a Very Useless man to even think of cheating.
If i find myself in that situation, then i will have to compromise.
I will fully help out in house chores and keep doing everything possible to keep motivating and encouraging her and not add not become silly by adding cheating to it.
That is why i see most ladies who broke shame guys as myopic.
They don't want to hustle and move their asses so that they can marry stable guys.
If you don't bring much to the table as a woman so as to checkmate the excesses of a man, na Sorry be your matter.
Power respects power no matter how small it is.
It is very easy for buhari/govt to roll out soldiers and start molesting harmless citizens who either come out to protest for salary increment, going on strike etc because the citizens have been rendered handicapped and not empowered to take their destiny in their hands but the same govt will come out to dialogue if they are to face chad, niger or benin rep. ?
Power, empowerment - no matter how small will check others excesses simply because these other countries have their own soldiers, armor tanks and won't be pushed anyhow or given bullshits.

Expensiverichyb:
you're right. It's sad because even the man in this scenario is at risk. Imaging married to someone who takes all the shit from you because you're her money making machine. She might not geniuely love you but because of what you offer. Such person has no reason to complain about any cheating nature in her spouse.
The bottom line is, when everyone stop getting married for the wrong reasons, things might get better.

emmaodet:
I think it as to do with many factors some of which are but not limited to -

Low self esteem - when you don't place a value on yourself, people will take advantage of you. When you think you are the problem and reason for which your hubby is cheating instead of knowing he took those decisions by himself and there is little or none how you can influence it.
He has to face the music.
Laziness - laziness leads to compromise.
If you are not productive enough to live the kind of life you picture, then you will have to compromise for a cheating hubby who is providing it for you.
A lot of rich and average guys in lekki, banana island, victoria island cheat a lot, even to the faces of their wives but such wives will rather stay put a live the luxurious life, good cars, sweet mansions, clean environment than breaking up with the men and probably live a lower life. They are too lazy to provide the kind of life the wish to live nor are they ready to live a lower life filled with integrity, self respect and value.
Sis, to most women, marriage is business.
They will subconsciously calculate how much they will be getting monthly as upkeep, cars, comfort, access to get easy visa and regularly travel out and on the long run the properties than she and the kids will get with money when the man puff and stay put, receiving bullshits and they rub it on her face.

That is why it's easier for a man to let go a cheating partner or not forgive her because on average, most men don't derive any tangible properties, cash or something of value to warrant and endure a cheating spouse.
Most women don't even have any leverage to compensate or compromise them cheating. In other words, they don't bring much to the table to forgive them cheating.
Remember, we all have a price. Most nigerian men will endure a cheating white woman just to get Residency permit of Citizenship. If you want to cheat, then bring values to the table and not just pvssy.

Oluromantic:
It's not a theory and the issue is not where it came from, it's when you will come to terms with the reality of it.

UncleJJ:
With all due respect, Madam, the Bible is a guide; if we use the bible to justify our decisions we will always find a supporting verse.

The conjunction "and" means "at the same time" in parallel. So, in Eph 5:33; "and" means the wife is expected to give and receive and vice versa.
If Eph 5:33; used "then" which shows sequence - "Love before submission would be valid"

However, the bible never gave conditions for giving and receiving besides marriage and everything that comes after it.
The bible never said, if your husband is an infidel - spit in his face and sleep with your ex because broke men should not have erections.
And the Bible never said, if your wife is disrespectful, refuses to cook or is a terrible cook, a husband can pick a side chick from AkwaCross.

Proverbs 31; provides guidelines for the husband and wife.

Rozz:
Hard work and the fear of God is what I will look out for,once a person posses these two qualities you will hardly find the person wanting in other areas.But these are qualities you can hardly find in men of these days.If I have my way,i would have love to marry very early so that before 30 I will be done having my kids but you read stories everyday about marriages that are not encouraging, even the ones you thought are having it good start telling you stories on getting closer to them,you can see comments from men here trying to justify cheating and want the women to accept it,its not fair .Just very few women are lucky and I want to be among the few ones.Thanks MA.

crackkhaus:
Females (aunts, older cousins, maids, family friends) are the sexual predators no one really talks about.
Hiding in plain sight, these paedophiles have been able to normalize their behaviours around innocent little boys.

- A female can bathe a boy child and go scot-free. A male cannot bathe a girl child without suspicions.

- Females will show off their breasts and asses in front of little boys on the excuse that they are changing clothes. If a man changes clothes in front of a little girl, the streets will hear it.

- Females can share a bathroom with little boys, but should males try the same thing with little girls, it's a cause for concern.

- They say you can rape a female even if she was wet, but you can't have raped a man who had an erection. The idea of consent only works when it's a female.


These are some of the inequalities pro-women advocates will NEVER talk about because it doesn't fit into their victim narrative.
Apparently, only men can be predators because that's what the MSM would have us believe...but some of us know better.

There are more females walking around who have at one time in their lives exposed themselves to a boy child or touched his weenie unnecessarily than there are males who have exposed themselves to a girl child or touched her funny. FACTS!!!

lasher1:
Unknown or totally ignored by society is the fact that strange sexual perversion; which is observed in some men like phedophilia, rapist tendencies, homosexual attitudes, sexual addiction etc can be traced in many instances to this issue of early sexualized children in care of househelps, aunties and even neighbors right under the nose of their ignorant parents.

The Randy lifestyle in young men who can't stop chasing everything in skirts to be used and dumped; or the inability of a man to stay faithful to one lady are some outcomes of this careless attitude rooted in early male child sexual abuse

So each time you ignore the molestation of a male child by ladies expected to care for them you prepare the future for a sexual monster to be unleashed on society .

KELVINXY:
1.the sexual harassment of the males are usually swept under the carpet and its really worrisome

BTW
2. Op why dint you complain to your parents

Mindlog:
Men have a key role to play in criminalizing the sexual abuse of the boy child. There must be continuous discussions and actions around it because such abuses are being diminished by the male folks themselves, you tend read some of them asking others who tend to speak up, if they didn't enjoy it? Some will even joke that they don't mind being raped by women.

Toxic masculinity as a defense mechanism has made some feel that males cannot be sexually abused but rationalizing that it is even the female that's even being used. A boy child who admits to being sexually abused should not be construed as weakness.

Men have to take charge in fighting it because a paedophile irrespective of gender, is both mentally disordered and a criminal.

The sexual abuse of boys and men is an ignored crime.

Osidazz19:
Nigeria is already way over populated. This is real bad news for this country.

One of the biggest problems in Nigeria is the fact the incomes is way to little to support the population. People keep saying Nigeria is rich, No you are not when you have so many people to take care of with very limited resources.

jeff1607:
Wow this is new, I thought celebration of the birth of prophet Mohammed was a universal thing.

adexpa:
Ok ooo, but I never mentioned a single verse, check my post Eph 5(21-25 n 21-33).

Enjoy your bed time madam.

Rozz:
i am not married ma ,just trying to point out that there are reasons why some women find it hard to submit to their husbands

Rozz:
These men thinks submission comes easily because they see verse supporting it, you can't be a cheat and a drunkard and still want submission.no way

adexpa:
well-done Ma......why dont you build up your verses from 21-33.......genuine readers dont just pick a verse and start conversation.

Beside, you did not read my last sentence where i gave my own submission about how things should be done(individual should identify their roles and play them without waiting for the other first). It is well(may God not give us man/woman that will frustrate our life).

SEMcrunch:
Submission means the acknowledgement of a HEAD ABOVE YOU and to come


under Authority. The act of submission is like given up thy Rights or yield to the

acknowledge authority above thee.

"Submit yourselves unto your Husband"

So when God said SUBMIT yourselves he didn't say submit thyself to your Pastor

or Boss but unto thy own husband.Some women say to their husbands "If not for

the pastor's counsel to obey theeI wouldn't have done so". It then means that it is

the pastor you are submissive to and not your husband. You aren't submissive in

God's sight if you submit yourselves to everyone except thy husband. You may have

more education, smarter, work in a prestigous i work yet you must submit unto thy

Husband because by so doing she is fulfilling as obligation and enables the husband

play the leading Role.

Submission is not because you are inferior but because of Divine order and

purpose. Jesus isn't inferior to God but he submitted to him because of the

purpose of salvation. Similarly, a woman isn't any less than her husband; however

for God purposes, it is her position to submit and she must do it cheerfully as unto

the Lord.

Do you know why marriages aren't working? It's because wives are refusing to

read more https://samcrunch..com/2020/04/wives-and-submission-to-their-husband.html#more

adexpa:
Pastor Mrs, everybody quoting Bible to favour their side..... don't turn Bible for us oooo...Read Ephesians 21-25... Submission comes before love. Your genuine submission provoke his love. Men naturally comes with headship ego and women can suppress that with submission, I think that is why Bible suggest wife submission first.

But I think the best is for individual to know their roles and play them accordingly without waiting for one party first. Though, this will take a dedicated and disciplined man but it will go a long way to make peace.

ahnie:
It's spiritual dancing......the sponge,soap an water are possessed,but fear not laslas he go dey alright.

But in case you don't believe me
..I cud always ring the elders to chook mouth for the matter.

Cc...
Crackhaus
Bukatyne

These are the newly recruited elders.

dre11:
https://dailypost.ng/2020/04/23/husband-allegedly-kills-wife-for-denying-him-sex-days-after-their-wedding/

Kenturkey048:
why is it that no one is paying attention to the insensitivity of the wife....?

Living with an insensitive person Is worst than living in hell...I have a first hand experience of what the op is saying because sometimes I just feel like parking my bags and going to a place where I can have peace of mind.....

lalasticlala:
Stella Damasus finally unveils her daughters who are all grown up now as she celebrates her 42nd birthday.

The Nollywood star actress and her daughters covered the maiden edition of her magazine, ADIVA MAGAZINE.

The mother of two wrote:



https://www.instagram.com/p/B_XMUzwDZDf/?igshid=4xvsyns02oa3

funmisticqueen2:
black soap is not for everyone.

A lot of skincare sellers now mix all sorts into black soap. Had a terrible reaction to it once.

Oluromantic:
Men cheating and women cheating sound same but are different. A man would cheat and still love his wife. When a woman cheats, there's always no love in there anymore. I'm not trying to be a chauvinist but it's true. So reactions can't be same.