₦airaland Forum

SixDividedByTwo:
waste-length braids used to be a no-no for me, but I wear them now (almost waist-length) and get lots of compliments on them. "trashy" is the last thing they are.

shopping for jeans is what I find frustrating. the jeans out there these days are mostly for thin people with no body. it's like a hallelujah moment whenever I find the perfect pair of jeans

You said almost waist length.

Any length to waist is cool, after that, it's trashy.

I wear long braids and one time it past waist length, the complaints started from my husband to my colleagues and I started noticing it too on others.

I feel you for the jeans joor. Now imagine us that don't use trousers. Jean skirts is officially out of the market.

Even cuts for men's trousers now run smaller.

You would have to buy a big 14 to get the fitting of a size 12 four years ago.

@ Lalasticlala

Naijacost22:
The marriage got annulled. She had no right to interfere with the mans marriage.

How can her marriage be annulled without her knowledge?

If the Church was serious, would they not postpone the new wedding till issues are sorted out?

How can you marry a husband on 20th Oct and tell the first wife to come on the 23rd Oct to settle the issue? Same parish?

Besides if the marriage was annulled, shouldn't the wife have the annulment papers with her? Why is she just looking for them from the Church?

What was used to annul the first marriage?

When people lack spiritual wisdom.

Ishilove:
Yea. Most of my skirts are fish. There, attention is focused on my hips and away from my bum

Very cool.

Ishilove:
Some people are naturally plump tummied. If the tummy is wobbly, simple tights to hold the tummy in will solve the problem. Shikena

@bold: Hahahahahahaha

thorpido:
Shedding some weight is also good especially for the ones that have given birth.Plumpy tummies are not attractive.

So flat tummies turn you on....

Do you use the tummy as a body plate?

Ishilove:
Jergens darkens. It is the opposite of bleaching cream

@ahnie, jergens is off

I use Palmer's coconut oil DIY mixed with olive oil anyways.

Ishilove:
I don't apply make up too but what I do is wash my face at least three times a day and rub a little face cream to keep my skin supple...



In my dreams

Oya bukatyne, talk. I don't do ponda because it doesn't work for me. I use Mary Kay lip gloss but it doesn't last up to an hour before I unconsciously rub them off because I compress my lips when I'm tense. Nowadays I just rub talcum powder and gerrout of the house, society's standards of beauty can kiss my non-existent ass.

I believe too much washing would strip the face of the moisture.

If the face is very smooth, talcum powder and little lip gloss/ well defined eyebrows is fine.

Try licking your lips well before applying the gloss so that it sinks in and makes the lips soft as opposed to sitting on the lips.

Hahahaha at society's standard of beauty: I really don't care

Ishilove:
Aunty, tights only manage to press the little flesh there inwards so I wear skirts that are fitted from the hips down. I never wear straight skirts because it doesn't suit my body type. Fish skirts works perfectly. The peplum is spot on

I will try the skater gown

Learnt on the tights.

Fish skirts as per tapering down slimmer and ending in a peplum?

CheeZena:
Looking good is good business

Yes o.

ahnie:
What about those that doesn't apply make-up?face toner or whatever.

Any hope for dark skinned women like me...i need a good cream(not those expensive one)Tha wud make my skin shinny.

Why don't you use makeup?

And the facial toners etc are not makeups, they are actually products to use on your face.

According to faceperts, the daily routine should be cleanse (wash) ---> tone ---> moisturise.

So you can get cleansers, toners and moisturisers from a drug store. Some brands are more expensive than others. I know Skin Doctor cleansers work wonders.

@ Cream: Try Palmers' range of creams: cocoa butter, shea butter, coconut oil, olive oil etc. Also try Jergens, Neutrogena, Skin Success range of products.

Whatever you go for, add olive oil to it and mix well. It will make your skin soft, firm and supple.

@lalasticlala

Ishilove:
I am beyond shocked.

What kind of clothes can fit nyashless people like me?

I have hips but the nyash is non-existent

Try fitted skater gowns, long peplum tops and skirts. Also wear tights so that they can lift the butt and make them pecky.

Ishilove:
Very helpful. I don't know if there is any woman out there that doesn't change underwear everyday. It is unthinkable

Thanks a lot.

You would be surprised.

.

Good afternoon peeps,

Happy Sunday!

Interesting topic innit?

The total package of beauty is a blessing to a woman which attracts people to her and grants her favour. A beautiful woman is also trusted faster.

Doubt me, observe beautiful people in a crowd and see how easily they get things.

So back to the matter.

A woman should take care of her outer (private and public) and inner beauty.

A. OUTER BEAUTY
Ai. PUBLIC
A woman should strive to look good/put together at all times (I know it is not easy, I am still learning myself and fine girl na money). This part is relatively easy as beautifully dressed women are everywhere especially at functions. The parts we will consider are:
1. Hair: The hair is the glory of a woman. Dress your hair well and keep it neat. If you sweat a lot, run away from wearing weaves for a long time or just so braids/wigs. Ensure that your hair styles properly fit the frame of your face and complexion. You see some very dark complexioned ladies spot red hair and you wonder if they are auditioning for the part of devil in a drama. It also seems extra long braids (I love waist length braids) is in vogue and I must say they are very trashy especially from behind. Any braids past your waist dropping to your bum is a no. It looks weird.

2. Clothes: Dress how you want to be addressed. Don't dress like a slut and expect to be treated like a queen, it doesn't work. There is a reason why you would leave an agbero looking man to ask a gentleman for directions when you are stranded. There is also a reason why you would engage the agbero instead of the gentleman when you want someone to push your car. Also know your statue (pear, hourglass, apple and square) and dress your self accordingly. A wiggle dress would complement an hourglass and look ridiculous on a apple shaped woman. Forget all those Facebook likes and dress well. If your legs are not straight, leave short skirts alone; if your upper part is bigger than the lower part, biko leave skinny jeans alone. Also, wearing yoga pants about is trashy; exposing camel toes, wearing dresses and trousers that show the outline of your underwear or butt is no no. If you know you have water bumbum, leave those tight Aba skirts/gowns and trousers alone. It makes your butt look very ridiculous and 'expired' (for lack of better word). Your attire should not be too tight or too loose. Fitted is the word baby. Also, some clothes makes a woman look womanly, go for them. Leave sagging to the agberos and low waist jeans. From observation, the best type of jeans is the 'stock jeans'. It is firm and holds your body well while allowing you breathe.

3. Shoes: Wear shoes you are comfy in especially when going to a place for the first time. Enough said.

4. Makeup: Some ladies fancy heavy makeup every day which is absurd. There should be a 'party face' and 'everyday face' so your pores can breathe. Some others (like me ) never put anything on their face. Well one of the differences of men and women. Because of the speciality of our bodies, we really cannot pull off just up and about on our faces. A little ponds powder and coloured gloss works wonders for me. For our sisters who believe it is a sin to do so, ponds powder and transparent gloss/lip balm and well brushed eyebrows works well. We need to groom our faces. Also, every complexion has corresponding shades in all products so go for your shade. No fanta face and coke body please. Please note the type of makeup for your skin type so that under stress and strain, the foundation doesn't give way.

Aii PRIVATE:
This is where a number of ladies have issues. They take care of their clothes more than themselves forgetting that our bodies needs to be right. Also alot of women put more effort for outsiders (outer public beauty) than their lovers re husbands at home (outer private beauty). We need to care for the private beauty that our husbands literally can't get their hand off. You know how appealing to the eyes and heart beautiful babies are? You just want to carry them all the time.

1. Face: Have a cleanser, toner and mositurizer for your face. If you can afford it, get seperate face creams for your face. If your face is fresh, you do not need to build foundations with POP and buckets of paint all the time. Avoid using the same sponge for face and body. Stop frowning so the face is not wrinkled. If you must always be under the sun, get a straw hat. I got one for N400 at Marina PEP

2. Body: Invest in a good body lotion and it is best to apply your lotion when your body is a little bit wet so it locks in the moisture. Eat well and drink a lot of water. Stop abusing your body with drugs, alcohol, over eating, tattoos, bleaching, abortions, too much pills, STDs, multiple sex partners, too rough sex, multiple piercings etc. It is the body you have at birth that will carry you for as long as you live. I cringe when I see well dressed women with dry skin/ feet. Bathe regularly and take time to cream almost all parts of your body. Pamper your body regularly with massages and DIY treatments. E.g. a lady here posted palm oil therapy; apply palm oil on clean body, leave for 15mins and wash off with black soap. Take care of your lady parts; change undies at least everyday; lather all nooks of your body while bathing; no jumping out of the bathroom after 5mins except during emergencies. Clean your nails and paint them if you are so inclined. If you prepare something that has a strong scent, washing a little cloth helps rid off the smell and keep your nails clean. Also take good care of your feet and go for pedicure sessions or DIY with warm water, cucumber and any lotion e.g. Pears. I also mixed my cream with olive oil for additional moisture. I see some ladies flaunt chest hairs. Pleaseeeeee, SCRAP it off and cover your chest. Some ladies are raising the bar to shave their legs and we are still feeling funky with chest and armpit hairs, biko. Pamper your skin and yourself, it makes you more sensual and awakens your sexuality. A win situation for you and oga

3. Hair: Some people's hair ooze heat underneath their wigs, weaves and braids. At least every week, clean your scalp with cotton wool and cleaner to rid off the smell and heat. If you are carrying your hair, wash regularly and add simple treatment (olive oil on damp hair and shea butter afterwards keeps the hair soft and healthy.


B. INNER BEAUTY: Wear a smile, no wrinkles, be kind, understanding, gentle, no agbero talking and shouting or too loud laughter, you are not an hyena. Also lay off the swear words and masculine gestures. Don't compete with Ajah touts in mannerisms and street slangs.

Have a beautiful week ahead.

I love beauty

And yes, you can pay this level of detail and still conquer the world.

Lizzyangel:
it's ''que sera sera'' Sis.

Thanks

Spell check.

blank:
No more drive. Everything's gone. But I have made my choice to be grateful for what I have and to ensure I replicate it in my kid's lives. They are boys so no stopping them.

Hello blank

How are you doing now?

Sorry I promised to respond however did not.

I understand how you feel (as currently working a job I have grown to hate as I feel I am made for more/something else).

That said, I have grown to understand that working a job no matter how 'fulfilling' is helping someone else to grow his/her dreams and after a while, there is the yearning to do more/ do your own thing (I have seen well placed colleagues 'doing well and growing' at an accelerated pace resign to do their own thing or stay at home to re-strategize their life.

A career alone cannot give that satisfaction human craves for. In fact, it is after every other thing is settled that you think of a fulfilling career or not.

I would say search deep on what your calling is and start to develop it. It never grows old nor loses its drive.

Cheers.

Explorers:
Thanks

Congratulations to a fellow October baby. God bless her and provide all you need to train her.

Elder0001:
What exactly is your stance? That women should submit while men give just 'love' ? Do men also don't want to be loved ?
Or both partners should practice a reciprocal submission?
Or submission shouldn't be in the equation at all?

First of all ,are you a Christian? If you're, then there's no need to debate with you because Christianity,islam and all major religions don't mean well for women.

What do you mean by 'just love'?

Do you know what it means to truly love someone and put the person first in everything?

My post is very clear.

Men are to love their wives, wives are to submit which really is same thing.

Yes women would still love their husbands and men respect their wives.

And like Mmotimo said, in a sane marriage, people don't go about harping on submission and love. They both put each other first and let things flow.

Like she also said, enduring abuse and adultery is just that: enduring.

It has nothing to do with submission neither does it have to do with financial power. I have seen women abused by husbands they are feeding; I have seen housewives treated like eggs.

Women should learn to pick good men.

Jadekitana:
Thanks dear

So far you and Emeka.

Just stumbled on this thread and found it interesting and entertaining.

Cc: Emeka524

MMotimo:
Co-signed!

More on bulk money:

The idea of dishing out lump sums to people with no business acumen or even basic commitment and focus is one of the largest drains in the pockets of my people. The majority of small businesses do not survive and if they do, most will not be profitable in the first few years, at least not enough to reflect the invested effort. Some people are better off picking up a second job carrying bricks than starting a business using "free" funds. If the money is borrowed with interest and/or collateral, the business person might be a bit more serious but no guarantee.

At the very minimum, ask to see a business plan and put some time into verifying if the idea is viable. Some people can sell snow to eskimos but most people do not have what it takes to build a profitable business. Even if they were selling water in the desert, they would still not break even not to talk of making profit.

So agree with you.

Everytime i see give him bulk money; give her bulk money.

If that person did not ask for it or doesn't have a business you want to expend, OYO.

I know who did the bulk money thingy twice for wifey and she & hubby finished the capital.

Now, she sent goods on credit to the sis for her to pay back. Another person sent a vehicle to his brother to do Uber who is repaying him back monthly.

OP can explore that option of a business which will yield returns and they split the revenue.

Elder0001:
You have two mouths.

You'll contradict yourself more than once in a single post.

Can you point out the contradiction?

Elder0001:
Women need marriage more than men need marriage.

Women gain more from marriage.

The whole marriage system is actually for men.

CheeZena:
A wife must be submissive yen yen...
Continue ooo...
Keep cheating on her and ordering her about. Beat her on top okay? I wonder how you comfortably eat the meals prepared by a woman you treat that way. You do realize you could die right? Have you red purple hibiscus by Chimamanda? She'll keep quiet and endure till one day she'll lose it and stab you in your sleep.

This above has nothing to do with submission.

A wife is to submit and her husband love.l which is just both of them putting the other first and ensuring they do all to make their partners happy.

Abusing, cheating, lying etc. is not because the woman is submissive or the man is loving.

It is a function of the character of the perpetrator and while we are at it, everyone owes themselves the duty of picking better spouses.

Whose fault if a woman picks a lying, cheating man out of the thousand suitors?

And if we assume that the man changed, what triggered the change? The first time the man cheated or hit her, why didn't she ensure he never tries it again?

When he continued, why didn't she walk out if she is not pleased with it?

We should teach women to pick good husbands and be good wives themselves.

NoHoper:
Mehn, these things are just getting worse for me.

So early this month I sent about 60k home, dropped 50k for ajo and the remaining for my upkeep and some bills.
Mom just called demanding for more money for her church stuffs. I told her I don't have money right now and she angrily hung up the phone. I called several times she refused to pick.

I am so confused right now...

Hard truths brother:

Your family has seen you as a matryr to carry the family's burdens.

They don't care about you as a person however as a source of livelihood

They will continue to emotionally blackmail you till you pack up or you free yourself.

Should children care for their parents yes? However, you are just to supplement their efforts and ensure they live comfortably.

I don't think the bulk money will work because they will squander it and come back to you for more.

You need to free yourself brother.

They are probably living the life you can't afford.

Imagine asking money for church when she is jobless and you have sent almost 30% home.

Even a bank with their cut throat mentality will ensure that your monthly repayment is not more than 30% so you can survive.

megareal:
You are heading for high BP If you don't slow down. If you drop dead today, they will still carry on. Family members always use those that are generous. It's high time you reevaluate your life. Encourage your younger siblings to start making money, no matter how small through menial jobs.
If you had savings, I would have advised you call a family meeting, give your father a lump sum (not in millions) and inform him to use it for a profitable business as you want to start planning for your family. Love yourself dude.

Why father in his case?

He hasn't proven willing to work after the initial job loss.

@OP: Excellent job.

ednut1:
nigerians get what they deserve. A non accidented car can cost 2.1m to get here. No one wud buy it. After all accidented own of 1.6m dey

This is a joke right?

And it doesn't occur to you that they buy what they can afford?

DrObum:
How come she is now fair?

Her father's crown changed her colour?

The fair woman is his ex-wife

thorpido:
Belated happy birthday Bukatyne.

Thanks a lot.

Longest time.