₦airaland Forum

Truepee:
Today early This Morning, I thought about something and this topic arises in my mind and i decided to share it...Have you ever thought about why Old men ranging 50-deathward decide going after young ladies or girls......Example is a man in my area he was married had a over 18 years boy, 15 and 10 years old boy and girl respectively...His wife ended up packing out on account of cheating on her with a young 19 years old girl which she describes as inhumane and heart breaking .....


The Big question is why do old men CHEAT on their wife... In nollywood movies they said to replenish their blood but that can't be possible .... Just say what you think might be the reason.

I think a rule should make to join husband and wife together forever.. Cos The woman will eventually be the ones sufering.

5minsmadness:
Lie.
Men cheat more. All men are cheats or repented cheats.

cap28:
You aint going to get any of this until you fight for equality and learn to assert your worth as equal human beings.

Men in nigeria walk over women because women allow it and collaborate with men to keep other women down, until women in nigeria wake up and understand that they are just as capable as their male counterparts men in nigeria will continue to take the piss out of them.

lilmax:
two cases

1.if she's a feminist then there's nothing wrong in what the man is doing afterall feminists see men as equals so no HEAD of the house

2.if she's not a feminist then there's something wrong with the man for not taking up his responsibilities

moshoodn:
I see lots of people saying maybe the child doesn't know the value of money....


Hmmmmm. . The child does know. The child knew very well what would pain the mum. It's like a vendetta..

Why not her pills, which may be easily accessible.

Why not tear her clothes or smash the remote controller of the TV.?

Why the money?

The child obviously knew that would make the mum go wild... And she sure did.


********************************************************
Addendum: Train up your child in the way that he should go, and when he grows, he will not depart from it. .

As a parent, the onus is on you.

Ishilove:
Lmao!! I trust Nigerians.

If I were a 24 year old struggling single mother and I just managed to hustle up our house rent, and my child now flushes that money down the toilet because I no gree watch film...

Kai kai kai kai...wo, I will beat shege out of your life. After beating you I will massage your body with hot water and give you kiddies paracetamol

In your life when next time I say no, you will know mummy means NO

White people ehn...That's why their kids grow up spoilt rotten. They carry guns and gun their peers down because of this useless sense of entitlement they have. No home training.

Tallesty1:
You are right.

Money isn't everything and cannot buy everything.

I have been with a woman who doesn't give a hoot about a man's money.

I learned this@emboldened......... from keeping pets. (not tryna compare women to pets oooo) My first pet was very hostile when I bought it.

She no dey allow me touch am and the dog no dey hear word at all....... Her favorite exercise nah to tear my clothes, bedsheets, curtains and carpet.

But things changed when I started showing her the normal love n care we show to our pets.

She became very respectful

She dare not do what I told her not to do even if she really wants to.

Now think about it, if pets(animals) can be that respectful because we show them love and care then imagine how respectful women will become if we should treat them nicely.

No matter how much she loves and respects you, a woman will eventually get tired if you don't reciprocate the respect.

tintingz:
No one knows who Toto Dikeh is/was dating until she got engaged, you guys should chill.

I support her words, this is common among our ladies...you will see them posting their "boyfriend" pics all over social media.

I don't know why they do this but it is silly to start posting a pic of someone that hasn't propose marriage to you.

emusmith:
At least, she praised my my thread...

Mrs0J:
Anyway, i have overlooked it. i do the one i can and, i did talked but he prefer i ask but am not wired like that. i hate to send an adult a message or remind him that something needs to be done.

LewsTherin:
Very true. In a bid to show how many yards of wife material that they are, many females will not let their boyfriends lift a finger to help with chores. Then when they get married they expect the guy to know that it is his duty to help with chores and hurt when he doesn't

Mrs0J:
No be laughing matter oo, d tin dey pain cos hubby is exactly what the OP described.

LewsTherin:
Sieving the amala? SIEVING THE WHAAAT? Dem dey sieve amala? Wow!!!

They say you learn everyday. I'm not sure I've learnt this one yet oh! Still too stunned!!

Mrs0J:
Then it's excusable, not when he's not and yet doesn't help out without been asked.

socrateez:
Most times it is the man's upbringing that comes to play in the home.

We had a discussion on this issue with some couples recently and I asked if they are teaching their boys how to support in doing house chores in their respective homes. The answer is no. So I said their daughters in law will face the problem they are presently facing.

The truth is that a guy who did not grow up doing house chores will find it difficult to enter into the kitchen and soil his hands when married. This should have been detected during courtship so that a lady knows what to expect after marriage. If you date a guy who does not have cooking pot but relies on eateries for dinner, you shouldn't expect him to join you in the kitchen after marriage.

If your man does not know how to support you with house chores what do you do?

Ask. Don't assume he should know what to do. Make a gentle request that he helps hold the baby while you're in the kitchen. Be bold and courteous. he will begin to learn.

LewsTherin:
It doesn't hurt to ask. I don't know about the OP's particular situation, but men are wired differently and many a time, we don't see these things.

Myself as an example. I help out in the kitchen regularly. I mean I make a good number of our meals. I got us a washing mashine so that takes care of the laundry - which I also help out as the case may be. We have a lady come in once a week to do a thorough cleaning and since it's just me, my Lady and the Princess, we don't make much of a mess and if we do, I don't just sit and watch her clean house. I'm trying to say I'm a hands-on husband and father.

But for some reason, my Lady is always doing something. I don't know what she does. I don't see what she does. But she's always busy. Many times I've had to tell her to sit the sod down and rest her feet. But every now and then, she's busy.

A woman may understand but I don't. Only when she says "help me get bla bla bla", or "help me do so and such" do I get an idea of what she's doing and help her do it.

LewsTherin:
My point is this. Depending on a man's upbringing and personality, he may not see what is ticking his woman off. All she has to do is ask. If that doesn't work, then we have a different issue on hand.

emusmith:
Sub-Topic: Things An "Average Looking" Girl Can Do That Will Make Her PREFERABLE In The Dating World


They are not so pretty so they employ all methods possible to keep themselves irresistible and wanted in the "dating world".

Note: These is not applicable to all of them but a few well-mannered ones who really wanna settle down.

Character, they say is what is left when beauty fades away; She holds on tenaciously to that seeing the BIG picture.

The painful truth is, by DEFAULT 60% of Beautiful girls are on the contrary of all she believes in. As I said, most of it are old-fashioned but it's working for her.

I'm not generalizing

What are some things that an average-looking girl can do to make her WANTED in the Dating World?
Calhanoglu in Bayer Leverkusen may not be a very good midfielder but he is splendid at free kicks, so Man.Utd are after him

THE TRUTH IS, MOST OF THESE POINTS ARE INHERENT IN SOME.

1. Being nice with guys, in general. She is a helper.

Have you ever seen a lady who guys truly like? She is not that pretty but to guys, THAT LADY HAS CHARACTER and that sets her apart. She is nice even when she doesn't wanna date you, her wisdom in putting you off is astonishingly amazing. You feel good after she implies a No. That's being Nice. She even sends you a message after that but withdraws on time. I've met a few of them. After saying NO to you, you friend zone yourself in tacit, lol! She's just a gem.



2. "Irrelevant" and "Old fashioned" things like cutting his toe nails, bursting his pimples, knotting his tye, massaging his tired laps etc, are frequently done by her.

Yea, she does it and does it with humility and love. Not only when he gives you cash or buy you a gift. No. She does it because she loves to keep her man that way. It has become a part of her. She is "handy".


3. "Letting her guard down" most times, by becoming a friend to his difficult sisters and brothers.

When a girl like her starts getting closer to him, she may find out how some of his family members are a bit hysterical and difficult towards her. She doesn't turn away so quickly. If she likes him, she stays back and keep a good attitude. Soon, they'll see the stuff she's made of and will mark her "Good". Is it necessary? The question should be, Is he worth it? If he is, she will keep an optimal attitude.


4. Calling his mum, mummy- in such a way...


Yea, this may be common but hers is quite different. Most women know who their daughter-in-law will eventually be, most times, they know by the way she even addresses her subconsciously. It's a bit a mystery. She just can tell when she calls her, "mummy" in such that way...


5. Being simple in dressing thus passing a message to him: "I'm not extravagant; I'll take good care of our money."

I'm listing here what most average-looking ladies do to spell their worth in Bolded Fonts. One way is her dressing. To me, you mustn't reveal cleavage or bum to show you're pretty even when you know you're not. When pretty ones do stuff like that, guys see them like peddlers how much more you? Well, when she dresses modern and decent, she stands out. Did I say, those long and awkward-looking "ear machetes" Or earrings are not necessary to look decent?


6. When cooking, not over buying and over spending, sometimes she uses her own cash- Still passing a very vital message over to him.

Old fashioned? Yes! I know many ladies who do this not because they are trying to win him but because they are just that way. When you, an average... do it, you're passing a timely message. Even in Uni then, there were ladies who were like Mamas. Guys and friends can trust them for food then. They are homely. Guys love that in ladies tho. An economical lady. The sweetness of a correct egusi soup IS NOT directly proportional to the amount of money used i making it but the skillfulness in the lady involved.


7. She spends time building herself intellectually. How most men love this!

Aya! Who doesn't love a girl who knows that she knows but still knows when to come in? She mustn't be a lawyer or a doctor to be a reader or learned. After all, many of those talk flippantly and still don't make sense. She acquires skills for the purpose of her Husby and children. That's preparation. Don't forget that many husbands have lost the route to their wives' pots and channeled it to one Mama Put or One Ekaete somewhere.


Have a nice day.

pinkiberry:
only desperate girls that really need to marry do this but sorry i arnt desperate.




after doing all these for a guy he starts feeling like some kind of demigod.

plappville:
Its true that women are more of this, but som3 men do it too. Its disgusting how many believer behave in front of thier Pastors. They cant hurt a fly when in front of Pastor. Some will cause you with the God of thier Pastor as if is only thier pastor that have access to God. Maybe its the impression the pastors put in them i cant understand. The other time. A friend told me her brother swear for her that "the God of TB Jeshua will punish her in life" hahaha. It made me laughed but i think this is a serious isaue. In Facebook and even here in Nairaland. Many go about spreading pastors birthday when some do not even know when thier parents date of birth. This virus is fast spreading to even the young pastors. No wonder many are breaking out to form thier own church.
Nice thread OP. I hope all women will learn a thing from this. No body says we ahould not show respect ooo..

hedonistic:
And what would you say when the boss is having an illicit sexual relationship with the woman (as is very often the case)? Is it still not true that the unfaithful woman would kneel down and give m the boss a good Mouth Action in his office and still tell him yes sir /with all pleasure sir ontop... Even though she will later go home and give her husband or boyfriend nothing but 'equality' attitude?

Knowing woman and the many shocking things they are capable of I think the boss- husband comparison by the OP is very apt.

NashvilleTN:
Hmmmn,

I can only wonder how she knew the man doesn't know how to f**ck at all. I guess she has experienced him.

I hope you know how to f**ck very well, if not, then you may have a problem.

Bottom line, your wife needs to explain who she was talking to and what she meant. She obviously is worried about what you heard that's why she wants to know what you heard.

May be her friend told her, that her boyfriend cannot f**ck at all, then in that case you have nothing to fear. But ..........

MizMyColi:
Lols
Perhaps, the activist in me gives me off as one.

I am not for Equality...I am for equity, fairness and justice.

ronald4lif:
Although the bolded is true and to some extend it's even more ardous to perform domestic chores than conventional jobs but it's hardly possible to equate money-making to anything else in life, especially in a capitalist world we live in. Wealth naturally makes people assume power and dominion over others so the majority of family fanancier will likely feel they have dominion regardless of the significance the other party (housewife) feel their contribution to the union may be.

Prior to the advent of feminism and it resultant effect to some part of the world women traditionally played the role of a housewife but not until they started attaining education and making progression in topical profession, making their own money, even as they boycotted the mentality of a breadwinner before egalitarianism could make waves and progress.

The role of domestic chores and babysitting can be assume by either partner who's not working, male or female alike or split by both which I find more acceptable. But the mentality that a man should be the financial contributor in a /relationship/marriage would not help the feminism struggle in a patriarchal setting like ours on women's path. Chances are that anyone who foot the bills will always feel they're in control.

Tallesty1:
#invisible_mode_activated

kosplateau:
gud one but since 90% hide under feminism as fake Christians and moslems do. .they should not call the men out when hit at..I mean verbally here. of course if one can't keep up...one is free to end d charade called marriage.

MrLouisVanGaal1:
You are probably between 19 and 25. A time where a young lady can be wild and free and say things like 'i don't need marriage' 'i don't need a man'. in 5, 10 or 20 years time when you would achieved all you want in life, shut out everyone mocking you for still being single, you will then sit and realize you are an emotional creature. Emphasis on emotional. At that time you will know what the word 'void' means in the dictionary and then you will fully understand what a ring and a Mrs completing you actually meant. Not the naive, girlish understanding you have now. It's funny how one of your champions Beyonce never gave that ring a second thought and she even brags with the name Mrs Carter.

4C2215131:
Not really...just that coming across as 'socially correct' (an indispensable index in her line of business) is a pretty huge motivator to acting out a script of everything being honky-dory at home and the like.

Tallesty1:
Lols. I modified my comment to add that part when I saw someone's comment here.


I am just looking for her trouble this afternoon

ronald4lif:
Perhaps I made a blanket statement. But a lot of your clique I've encountered don't assume much of a financial responsibility when in an affair. The aspect of even financial responsibility is where I'm much indifferent with Nigerian feminism.

1trillionlikes:
that is exactly the summary of the thread