₦airaland Forum

MizMyColi:
This writeup is written by a Nigerian, especially for Nigerian Ladies.
Please understand that while I and the writer share this view, you are under no obligation to share.
If it does not resonate with you...please feel free to toss it out and shout like Orubebe did "WE WILL NOT TAKE THIS; THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE"
If it does resonate with you, please welcome like a breath of fresh air.




https://wordsmithf./2015/09/30/woman-you-are-more-than-a-ring-and-a-title/

kosplateau:
yea...a lot of Nigerian women marry because of hardship. They want an escape. So if u don't need any emotional and financial savor... stay out. and stay out of sex if u wanna b religious.

nobody stops u from achieving ur dreams...na una full law sch and medicine dept.

proxillin:
Read the ops message. The message is about how women should not take marriage serious. They should not train themselves for marriage.
Any woman taking advise from post of this type will end up being Rihanna, Myley Cyrus of this world. They are human with no respect.

ronald4lif:
Not so much is wrong with feminism in the real sense of that word. Having an equal footing with a woman is not a problem and myself and some other guys don't have a problem with gender equality. However, Nigerian feminists are fake and insincere with their feminism crusade.

They don't take equal financial responsibility in relationship/marriage and subliminally still harbour the breadwinner ethos of men. A man is still expected to seamlessly impress them with gifts and treats while they don't or sluggishly return the gesture. You can't champion equality and same time depends on a man for livelihood.

4C2215131:
And who in God's earth told you Omotola is happy? Gotta ask, as you seem to speak or should I say write with such belief. You never know man...you never know (beware the plastic smiles and cheap media projections as the issue of happiness anchored on the emotions of the other sex is a very contentious one).

Who can really fathom the depths of the human psyche, the human mind...

proxillin:
[size=15pt]But come to think of it.

To my anti-marriage feminists. Marriage is joy and strength of a woman.

Show me a single successful woman. NONE. I am not talking about female celebrities who are into semi-prostitution.

I am talking about powerful women. They are all married.

Hilary Clinton - is married. Despite her husband cheating on her, she still stayed in the marriage. She nurtured her marriage and she got to places. To get to place of power, you need to show the world you have a family and you are responsible. No singleton will be taking serious.

Angela Merchella (German Prime minister) - She is married

Mention a powerful woman in the society, you will see she is married.

All these lopsided writeups to dissuade/discourage women from marriage is just out of it. [/size]

MizMyColi:
Glad to see my friend inspire ladies on a wider scale.
If anyone has ever wondered what it is about me and how I think/the folks I mingle with, look no further!
One of them wrote this.



I remember when I started politics newly....he is the one thing that kept me in that section during the early days.
His words ring loud and true every now and then.

I look at the guy who wrote this, and I'm hopeful for the Nigerian Man.

Tallesty1:
A Lady after reading this:



Lady: Oh, I love this. Thanks MizMyColi, I just wish our ladies will learn.

Then she receives a message from boo.

Boo: Are you free? Let's hang out.

Lady: Oh! I love this. Thanks boo.


So she goes out with boo, straffs him all night and everything she read wipes out automatically.


And everything still remains thesame.




BTW, the op failed to realize that marriage increases a man's or a woman's worth too. I don't care who you are or what you have achieved, if you are single then you are incomplete.


And What's with people and their recent attack on marriage btw? Is marriage the only institution that is failing?

Nothing on earth is better than a blessed marriage, it's an achievement on its own, the reason most fail is is our sin.

It is sin that will make a man to hit his woman. It is sin that will make a man see a woman as a lesser being, it's sin that will make a man to cheat on, beat or mistreat his woman in any way. Same thing goes for the woman.


Listen, if we all should repent and follow God's guidelines for marriage then believe you me that marriage will become the best thing on earth.

soonest:
She's a marriage proponent and has children for him. She says bitter or sweet, marriage is marriage. She's been advised to thrash the issue with him but she says she's done that alot of time and no change so she's tired of talking and will wait for when the tables turn.

LewsTherin:
Onegai, bukatyne, I must confess I'm flattered. Thanks for the respect. I feel you too. People need to learn that there is always another way and that way can be a lot better. I'll share my morning yesterday.

I made breakfast for my Lady and myself. Rice and fried plantains with fried fish stew. But I didn't spend more than 10 mins in the kitchen. Simply put the rice in the rice cooker, sliced the plantains directly into the deep fryer and stew that my Lady made a little while back straight into the microwave from the freezer. I just checked on everything once in a while and before you could say Nairaland, breakfast was ready. The missus was only too pleased to dish the meal. If I needed her to kneel while serving my food, I'm quite sure she wouldn't have minded. After all, the meal was ready with no stress for her as she had to get the little one ready for school.

The point I'm trying to make here is that it doesn't take much to help around the house. The rice cooker was a gift from my sister and her husband for our wedding 4 years ago. I got the deep fryer off dealdey.com for a great price over 2 years ago. 8k or so. Most people already have nukes and deep freezers. A guy doesn't need to leave everything to the wife because it's "her responsibility". How many of us big boys would go to the photocopier to get our ish done in the office because the secretary is busy on other things? Isn't it her job to do that? Why don't we make a fuss of it when we do?

Sorry for the long post but I just needed to pass the point along that even if, like LordReed said, it's only the basics we can do in the kitchen, those basics are still enough to prepare a meal for our families.

AnneMomoh:
if you dont want to be called names dont make your family issue public,pls go back to what ever country you are coming from and cheat on your hubby.

The fact that you came back to nigeria and he cheated on you does not make cheating a Nigerian thing.

Where ever you are coming from , i believe men and women cheat on each other.

Madam pls go ahead and cheat on him as long as it makes you happy.

Coming online to Rant does not change your pesonality of a low life individual that is sticking with a Husband because of money.

Where ever you are coming from, i believe women dont stick with a cheating hubby cos of money. Women there and all over the world hve intergrity. They stick to a cheating Hubby not because of a money.

THEY STICK IN THAT MARRAIGE because OF THINGS THAT MONEY CANNOT BUY.

temibobo:
Cheating back on you hubby will only spoil your name. Wanna get back at him? Divorce him, do well in business,train your kids as you should, carry yourself properly,meaning take good care of yourself. On the long run they will wish they would have threated you better etc etc. However there is simply no turning back,typical case of people dont know what they have untill they lose it.

How many men truly change after being caught cheating,even if they claim to repent? A woman is kicked out of their matrimonial home, whilst men get oppurtunity after oppurtunity. Once a man knows that eventually the woman will give in,he will continue in his old ways,knowing his behaviour has no consequences. (maybe temporary interuption of konji and food...which he was already getting outside anyways)

Whatever you do when you are a divorced woman is totally up to you,so if you wanna get your freak on every once in a while you can do that in your own private time without people running their mouth.

Just make sure you focus on becoming a better you,develop yourself so you can also be a good mom to your children. Do not drag the kids in the divorce mess by denying him to see the kids. Do demand that proper arrangements must be made and both of you threat eachother with respect.

Just my two cents.

nickibarb:
yeah whatever. prostitute, slut,LovePeddler what other name do you have? total bullshit. and he has decency for cheating on me right? this stupid Nigerian mentality is one the reasons I resisted us moving back here. He just came here and started behaving like a lot of other men around here cos this society lets them get away with their nonsense.

jadelyn007:
Cheat because you found someone really hot you are lusting after not because he cheated. That way you won't feel empty when you are done. Rather you will long for more. You'll glow and radiate a sense of satisfaction and happiness.

FredBloggs:
Both men and women need to start putting equal effort to make a marriage work. what a man cannot take he shouldn't do it!

Tallesty1:
Because of the money.


She blew her own cover there.

MarvellousGod:
SMH. .. I wonder what makes some men feel the world revolves around them...

Tallesty1:
His Story:



I lost my job (after putting in 7 years) about 11 months ago. The management decided to lay off some staff-with little compensation. Unfortunately, I was affected…the financial compensation is not much and one has been careful not to run out of cash before another job comes.

What is stressing me out is the attitude of my father in-law in all these. When things became challenging (economically) for us, my wife took our only baby (8 months old) to her parents’ house.

She’s been living there, the few times I made it clear that I want them back home with me, my father in-law said I should focus on finding my feet first and leave my wife and child where they are –for now.

I am very bitter about things right now. It’s not as if things are very bad for us, we still get by. Just that I made it clear to my woman that we have to cut down on all our expenses, so as to be able to manage the little money on me…as I intensify efforts to find my feet again.

My father in-law is making me run my home from his house. Right now, I really am considering going for another lady, so that he can marry his daughter. But I want to be advised first.

Imagine a wife that doesn’t call me on the phone and even when I call, she would refuse to pick the call.
When I go there to see my baby (a girl)…she gives me attitude.

It is even beyond her to ask how I am faring or even ask after my mother that has been battling ill health for months.

Should one’s partner not stand by him during trying times? I am not a lazy man and I have been making efforts to find my feet since I lost my job but I also deserve to find happiness in the woman I call my wife.

I am 36 years old, my wife (unemployed) is 28’’

Please what should I do?

cococandy:
Marriage is for better for worse o.
This is a perfect example of for worse. Not cheating and abuse that we encourage people to endure.

If only the wife was here cos she needs to understand that now is the time to stick by her man.

Mindfulness:
Let him send his wife a text message and tell her this:

I will get back on my feet but those who didn't stick around when times were tough, won't have a place around when times get better and they definitely will.

raumdeuter:
Why she no simply divorce him now

Tallesty1:
Sound like what whores and potential whores who do not know that they are whores would say.
Good points.

If someone is cheating on you then leave.

If you cheat back then it means you have always been a cheat and is looking for a good time to cheat and a reason too because you know the man will throw you out if you cheat on him first.

The op is just looking for a good reason to justify her cheating

nothing will make a person who's not a cheat to cheat......

Simple.

nickibarb:
So my husband cheated on me some months ago right, i realised this when i came across numerous flirtatious messages on his whatsapp (you might remember me from my previous posts). The drama resulting from that discovery was so complicated, i don't even have the strength to go there. Anyways, my reason for this post is that I am obsessed with paying him back in his own coin. I think i'm way too hot for that insult he meted out to me like does he think because i have two kids I am like totally off the market? The first two guys i flirted with as payback (via the same whatsapp) were falling over themselves to get with me. My husband saw the messages (i'm glad he did) and it drove him crazy, he was swearing fire and brimstone about what he'll do to any guy that messes with me. Right now, I don't feel any love for my husband, I kinda told him that already. He broke my heart and I don't think it can ever heal. I'm only here in this marriage co-habitation cause he has some money (i like the entitled life) and of course I would love to give the kids a two-parent home. (I have some cash of my own though but he has a lot more).

I totally ignore my husband now, I don't give a hoot about whether he comes home or not. Some days ago, after staying away for like forever, he came home ready to give a million explanations about his whereabouts but i wasn't interested, i just carried on a conversation with him like i didn't notice he had been absent (the same explanation i used to literally beg him for). It's making him so uncertain and shaky and i'm loving it. Looks like he enjoyed the attention i used to give him before when i used to whine about him not calling me and not coming home. Now i don't give a f*** and he knows it. Anyways, I probably won't cheat unless i meet a really classy, enlightened, well travelled young-man , the type i'm usually attracted to (like my husband), for now i just feel like ranting. Most Nigerian men are not my type anyway. I'm 27 so i'm not that old. This n**** messed with the wrong wife. Its been a slow boring day at work today maybe clients are already in pre-independence celebratory mode, so i'm available to read your comments. try and be nice okay *tougueout.

whirlwind7:
Traditional African customs have put most women in a disadvantage, especially those with randy husbands. If it were not so, this man wouldn't dream of bringing a love child to his matrimonial home.
To beat up his wife on top of it, is just too much to stomach. It is disheartening to learn that your spouse is cheating on you. But suddenly bringing home a child you fathered with another woman, and still expect your wife to "act obedient and responsibly" is the height of insensitivity.

And for the policeman who said its purely a family affair, that's nothing strange. No one expects animals in uniform to suddenly become human.
Battery and physical assault is clearly involved in this. It has become a criminal issue. Plus a helpless and innocent child who would bear the brunt of the entire episode.
Such a pity!

Nmeri17:
no felicitations??

buggaboo:
Well, it's really simple.

If you support him and you don't mind the same for your daughter, fine.

If you support him but don't want the same for your daughter, then you are a slowpoke.

happney65:
But a Dude here in the Southwest Married Omotola then?And omotola was 18 then isnt it?So what the Fuss?..She is an Adult and not a child..Note am not a Fan of Sanusi,but on this he hasnt done anything Bad..Skikena!

cococandy:
It's the culture.
It breeds them self righteous and entitled.

You'll see prostitute guys calling their female colleagues-in-trade hoes as if something makes it okay for them to behave in such ways.