₦airaland Forum

Matthewbriggs:
Now we are making progress ....

1. You agree that context matters, in deciding the way and manner a gift is accepted
2. You agree that no one knows or understands the context of this gift. and as such you did not comment directly to the OP

Next question.
Now do you think those who called the man insecure, and all sorts of names did the right thing ... without understanding the context of surrounding this gift. Do you think they should have seeked out more context surrounding the gift from the Op before coming to a conclusion.


PS. No where did I mention FIL needs to seek permission before giving his daughter gift. this is what I stated. and I quote



Informing him about the gift is not the same as seeking permission. it's courtesy.

kaboninc:
Do yourself a favour and compare both monikers.

A word of advice...never engage in every argument just because you want your voice to be heard.

From what I've see so far from you, most of your points are always disastrous, terrible advices too I must say...those who carry the feminist tag on their f oreheads!

Go to your husband, that's if you're married or run to daddy. Let them teach you more about life. Guess you refused to learn at the right time.

Sealeddeal:
Marriage was invented by man to check the competition that arise in search of mating partners. People should understand it and have it at the back of their mind that the so called god's injunctions on marriage are lies. Marriage is not a do or die affair.
I am forced to write this because i have noticed that alot of people are aversed to divorce due to their so called belief that divorce is sinful. People,especially,women have died in their bid to save their marriage,some others have been disfigured in their quest to make their marriage work. You will be destroying the time you need to be happy trying to get married or save your marriage. Having a partner is good but you must not be married and you must not remain married.

Matthewbriggs:
Just as I responded to coco.

The food tussing is me been overly dramatic and is not really the main issue here because I was not aiming for political correctness in my example. What I am driving out is to prove that the context surrounding a gift goes a long way in deciding how it is to be accepted.

Now do you think my above assertion is right yes or no.

kaboninc:
What's your point here?

Are you not tired?

Allow experience to teach you

crackhaus:
And they told you they are/were?

Remind me again, aren't this people political office holders?
You mean they would be feminists and we wouldn't know?
Please tell me you're kidding.

Have you ever stopped to think that the majority of women who presently and publicly brand themselves feminists, mostly are musicians, actors, writers, and media professionals with a brand to sell.

The real feminists were freedom fighters and activists, they held rallies, conventions, and marched through streets holding banners crying out for the disenfranchisement of the women folk - they walked their talk and changed lives.

What you have now are clowns, and no sensible female politician in this day and age will be a feminist or more so, even admit to be one.

Matthewbriggs:
@ bolded gift na gift.

How would you feel when you have spent your hard earned time preparing a really nice dish for your husband to eat and your mother inlaw arrives from the village one night complaining of the fact that you are feeding his son rubbish, she says look at how lean my son has become since he married you. She now tells you that the dish you just prepared is not good enough for him that you should shove your dish in the dustbin.

She steps in to the kitchen and prepares a dish for your husband and presents it to him as a gift in your presence, and your husband is like mummy thank you very much for this gift. This meal means a lot to me. [/b]

What do you think about this gift. Would you want such a gift.

Do you agree the way and matter a gift is given, goes a long way in deciding how it will be accepted ?

beckyomas:
Hahahaha . I love it o but can't stand ripe plantain.

beckyomas:
Ah! No no no. That's my darling plantain, no dicing please.

IDEApro:
If every woman have this mentality of yours, the world will be ended in the next century.

crackhaus:
Before you start on your usual roller-coaster of never ending craziness, which of these women are feminists?

And you think you're hot oo? Hehehehe....
It's allowed my dear Kanwulia - if you don't blow your horns, who will?

cococandy:
same to you darl

ileobatojo:
Thanks my dear.

Same to you and the oga!

ihedinobi2:
www.nairaland.com/2045999/little-things-determine-success-marriage/2#29044102

That post was where I gave a definition for leadership. It was also where I said that masculinity/manhood is defined by leadership.

Yes, we are. I said as much. It is because we're discussing husbands and wives that I have kept speaking the way I have been. Throwing in CEOs and all that distracted from that. Outside the home, the dynamics change a bit and it becomes a slightly different discussion.

I brought it in. As a question, remember? I asked you if co-pilots, XOs, etc are leaders. And I asked whom they lead.

You know how you and I love to look at these things through Christian ideology. So let's do that now. Does the Bible say that woman is the head of the man? Or was it the other way around?

I said that? I don't remember. Where was that?

ileobatojo:
I disagree. The mods can and should stop it. That's exactly the purpose of moderation in online forums.

cococandy:
then why do you bother telling ladies how to act? Are you a girl? And what do you know about womanhood? Sauce for the goose ehn?

beckyomas:
My pix refused to upload.
I swear I still see this beans (fried with prawns and smoked fish) and plantain in my dreams. I'm not much of a cook sha but I manage. Lol

cococandy:

ihedinobi2:
I defined leadership clearly. I also said that it is the defining quality of manhood. Because, clearly, the discussion here was about the relationship between men and women.

Also did I indeed say that women aren't leaders?

Happy Sunday to you too.

Nonso23:
Throwing insults is a two way street.
I have absolutely no problem with that.
As long as they can endure as much and more than they can dish out. It's fair game.

Nonso23:
I'm not interested in taking this thread serious, not now, not ever.

I own my opinions, i do not apologise for them and i choose to share it when i want to and with whom i want to. Right now i don't feel so generous.

Nonso23:
Go through the few threads on the first page of the famous family section.
I'm irritated by this conversation even. I've made my resolve and i'll stick with it. Henceforth it is civil for civil. Silly for silly. Crazy for crazy. Fair enough.
Until I master how to ignore such threads that is.

Lordreed and I have always being on different sides of the divide. He rides on the back of the obnoxious nature of the uncouth females here to make a mockery of himself. He is his own problem, not mine.

No one has the monopoly over insults.

LordReed:
You truly have to be amazed at this kind of thinking. If second wife equals car then first wife must be bicycle, lol. No wonder they assume the women are some kind of thing you buy in the market and becomes your property.

ihedinobi2:
I said that leadership is taking responsibility to go ahead and secure the road for those coming after, remember?

LordReed:
Yeah the daughter is going to Bleep the new car.

crackhaus:
What's all this about women marrying a man and complaining that they didn't choose to suffer because he didn't buy her a car?

I thought modern women get married, earn their own money, and buy their own cars...

The truth is gradually being revealed -women on NL actually want their husbands to buy them a car, but don't want to act submissive to get this car...interesting!

ihedinobi2:
Yes, the definition of masculinity is leadership.

I said nothing about women but now I will: is a co-pilot or a chief officer or an XO or a prime minister a leader? Who do they lead?

I don't think I said anything here about stooping to conquer. Regardless, it's an idiom, like when you say "it rained cats and dogs". It means that someone gains their desire by humbling (or submitting) themselves to something or someone.

I thank you for your kind prayer and here's an amen to it. There are things that I don't feel I can compromise on. They include marriage. I have said before that if I don't find someone I can trust with the purpose of my existence I won't bother with getting married. The trouble is just not worth it.

And I don't quite make blanket statements about peoples of the world. To me, Nigerian women are practically the same as Americans or Chinese or Filippinas. The difference I would expect will come from the specific situations of the economy in each place. For instance, Nigerian women like money? As far as I know, all women like ease and comfort. What I am after is one who knows how to maintain it when she gets it and I have seen no reason to believe that Nigerian women work less hard at maintaining it than any other nation. Women I've been interested in have been responsible and hardworking. And they were all Nigerians.

The same way, I don't doubt that there's a woman that I can open up to and she won't walk all over my inner strength and lay it to waste. I just don't imagine that she's any easier to find in Nigeria than anywhere else.

Sophyrocks:
And if you are a christian, you would remember the bible quote bukatyne rephrased. An example of a very proud man in the bible was King pharoah. We all know how his pride led to his fall. Allowing pride get in the way in all your decisions will lead to failure and could portray you to be insecure/less confident. And i can confidently tell you that defining manhood to be pride is false. Not all men are proud. The word you should use is confidence. Pride is an overexaggerated form of confidence, some steps ahead. It stems from taking yourself too seriously. I can be confident but not proud. People tend to mistake confience for pride.