There are some courses I paid for to get serious with them, but I couldn't go along with them. Because I got other things at hand.

I pursued many things in 2023. Some paid; some were futile. But in the end, I just needed to settle down and pick a few.

Chasing many things at a time gears toward securing abundance and options - if plan A fails, there is plan B...there is plan c... But in the end, you waste a lot of time and energy.

To hold on to one thing amidst this darkness takes temerity and hard morale. You must have a clear vision of the future, a predictive ability top-notch + the ability to maneuver and rotate on one point.

I would have used that money to "flex my life". Lol.

At the end of 2023, I have no regret though. Because I engaged in all of my adventures. (If I hadn't purchased those courses, by now I would have been thinking of missing billionaires' chances).

Follow your guts, and you'll have little to no regrets. It doesn't guarantee success though, but you'll always learn a lesson and be glad you tried.

Living life with a series of regrets is not a good way of living. Test all waters: Drink, fish, sail, swim.

Thanks.

There's a higher rate of rejection when you cold approach women on motion.

To minimize the rejection rate, approach women in stationery positions more.

Examples:

That girl buying groceries.
That girl waiting for a bus.
That girl sitting with her phone.

Friends were strangers once upon a time.

On motion, you can compliment, suggest and then, escalate.

Move.

You know we always love hearing the other side of the story from the second person. Anyways...

1. There is a reason you've allowed this girl to stay in your house for six months. There are reasons why you insist on marrying her despite her shortcomings.

Unfortunately, you didn't make mention of her good qualities.

2. Since you've been persistent with her for a long time and expect an all-around change, it's possible her good side overrides her bad side.

3. Women of marriageable age are always happy when they are with men they love + marriage is around the corner.

If this girlfriend or fiancee of yours isn't enthusiastic about starting a family with you + hasn't started acting as a wife despite your seriousness and responsibilities towards her, it signifies that she isn't interested in you + lacks genuine desire for you.

4. A woman should be the one pressuring a man for marriage, not vice-versa.

A woman should be the one pushing you to come see her parents, not vice-versa.

And this only happens when she has a genuine desire for you + wants to spend her remaining years with you.

5. A woman who loves you will reciprocate your good deeds towards her. Especially when both of you cohabit and are nearby.

So if she can't do what's expected of her when with you, with marriage drawing near, I don't see how she can when both of you get married.

6. People help people they love without being asked all the time. Without being demanded or cajoled all the time.

If your fiancee can't do things with her initiative without being asked, then, she isn't someone you can lead in marriage.

7. The relationship started with lies. That's a red flag.

8. Not only that, after you've made your marriage intention, she was still cohabiting with her "bestie" until you confronted her.

That's a red flag.

9. She gets angry and doesn't mind throwing you under the bus.

That's a red flag.

10. She knew your phone was important to you. She couldn't think of ways to help you with it.

What assurance do you have that when shit hits the fan in marriage she will be there to help you?

11. She had her "bestie" as a second option when you first threw her out of the house. She was bold to say she would meet him.

That's a red flag.

She only begged to stay because of her benefits from you.

12. Man you've cohabited with this girl to roughly know her true character and predict how she will act in the future.

13. How does she support you? Is she a student, employee, or entrepreneur?

You didn't mention it.

14. Probably, her good qualities overshadow her bad qualities. If you know you can manage her from that angle, fine. Happy married life.

If you can't, don't wait till January before you fling her out of your life and your house.

Thanks.

Emu4life:


You are on point but your Pen-Ultimate paragraph is a fallacy and we are helping spread/solidify the myth.

What I don't like about people who disagree, that is, people like you, is that you come here and counter without a reasonable rebuttal.

State what you disagree with and why.

Which paragraph? Which myth? Which fallacy?

I don't talk because I feel like talking. I come fully prepared.

Do you know what's called African youths in Waithood?

Au revoir.

Regex:


How do I like this comment a million times?

The issue of religion is the one thing that is actually withholding Africa. Without religion, one would have discovered how horrible we are, but you would see a very horrible person console himself with being good because he goes to church and pays tithe. Religion is making us as a people preventing us from using our common sense. Imagine someone posted a prayer on Facebook; 'Because no one can explain how coconut has water in it no one will ever know your bearing' sort of. Looking at that post I could deduce ignorance and lack of capacity. We have surrendered everything to an imaginary being to a point where we can not think for ourselves. This is very appalling!

Ironically, the Western world that introduced religion to them never depended on the imaginary God or sky daddy to help them fight corrupt kings and monarchs.

These people suffered hell for centuries. But a time came, when they said, "Fvck it!". It wasn't an easy journey for them though. But there was progress every century.

What annoys me about Africa is that there's already an established template for national progress and development. However, corrupt leaders and their minions who have been baptized in the St. Poverty River, always want to take negative advantage of every opportunity.

African leaders and politicians never expected the kind of wealth, affluence, and abundance in government. They were deprived in the colonial era to take complete advantage. Independence was like a Santa Clause gift.

An ingrained poverty mindset + ignorance about religion is a common denominator among Africans. They prefer the short and easy road to success no matter how transient and destructive.

Africans need thorough and proper education before any form of development can take place. Unfortunately, the continent hosts the population with the lowest IQ - 85.

The factors necessary for change aren't present at all. The military and police, civil servants and workers, businessmen, and women benefit one way or the other from the cesspool, they aren't ready. By the way, they don't feel the tension and heat because they have cooling fans and air conditioners.

Change will definitely come. But it will take a long long long time.

There is no holy anger in the land. Fear has gripped us all. We are divided across tribes, religions, celebrities, and political parties. We are not ready a bit. Not this generation or the next three generations.

Africa is in for a long thing.

Sigh.

This is a core feature and major problem of African youths.

It doesn't matter whether you are the first, second, or last child. The political and economic depravity hits at all ends, in all corners of Africa.

The tiny amount of youths that can stand tall presently either started life and business early - as a result of awareness of the future + solid preparation, or the presence of parents or relatives who acted or are acting as their guardian angels to a perfect life.

For the majority of African youths, we were not prepared for the future at all.
Then if you add the role religion played - that many were hopping from one religious space to another for a miraculous magic to change their lives for good. You can be able to trace where the problem originated.

Meanwhile, the problem has been a parasitic extractive government. A government that cares for only the bellies and pockets.

We do underestimate the importance of a good government. Perhaps the success of those who made it despite their drawbacks and predicaments made it seem that people can succeed without good governance in place.

Truth: it's the government of nations that brings prosperity to their people or citizens.

Regardless of your good work and skill, if there is an embargo laid by the government - unproductive policies, or if the government itself is that embargo - bribery and corruption there can be no successful nation.

It is the government, the rich, and businessmen that sponsor innovations and expeditions. The highest the poor can come up with is idea and labor. If the equation is unbalanced it favors the few elites at the top while the masses suffer in pain and poverty.

The reality is that Africa isn't structured to succeed.

You all should quit the boasting and hopes because of your solid minerals and fertile grounds.

You need machines, science and technology, intelligent men, and economic genius to harness these things and bring prosperity. Such is alien in Africa.

For Africa to succeed, it must first crash to the bottom completely. Then genius and good people start building.

The innovations and goodwill people have can't bud well in a dirty political and economic system in Africa.

South America was as bad as Africa, but check them today. They may not be there yet but they are gradually coming up.

Britain, France, Russia, China, Singapore, and Japan were once backward and depraved like Africa. But they had to first conquer the extractive forces behind their economy and politics. But such is absent in Africa.

Imagine in the 21st century still singing praises of corrupt and inefficient political leaders. We take sides with them and fight ourselves. Can't you see how backward we are as a people?

History is history for a reason. There's no new template. Observe and learn. You'll understand.

Africans as a people are not in any way ready for a change. We continue to run an archaic process while expecting a modern change. That's to tell you how rooted we are in ignorance and stupidity as a people.

It is chapfallen to see that young and intelligent men suffer daily in Africa because they are limited in finance and assistance. Many have lost their hopes. Many are still scratching and scavenging.

Many have now opened their eyes to fraudulent activities. This is a direct symptom of poor governance. The most corrupt nations will always have the highest crime rate.

You don't want to give up? Fine. Keep pushing. You may be lucky enough to see the light. Better try and fail than do nothing.

You don't give a fvck any longer? I understand. You have a point in your pessimism.

I don't see Africa getting close to the opening of the tunnel not to talk of the end of the tunnel between now and the next 100 - 1000 years. Anyways, in Africa, we have common roots in the supernatural. Perhaps, one is on its way to turning our continent into a prosperous one overnight.

The continent isn't structured for progress. It's a specimen.

Sigh.

pansophist:


Yes. The preparation is very bad. The foods are factory produced in mass, and the source is equally corrupt.

Just put on YouTube "how fries/burger/pizza are made", to see the poison people eat daily, and they are shocked why they are fat and sluggish.

To make it worse, they now brainwash many that they are free to eat anthow, just buy slim tea, green tea, or fat loss tea and you'll lose weight

See Chidinma will swallow 30cm pizza with oregano and barbeque sauce, then waste extra cash for slim tea, to further deceive herself that she is "working on her weight"

When all she does is make these businesses rich, as they laugh at the utter stupidity and pitiable situation of their customers.

Welcome to 21st century capitalism.

Companies or corporations are the unknown demons the masses will protect with their lives.

They are the fuel and energy of corrupt officials. Politicians are like rookies on their chess boards.

They sell the problem with the right hand while encouraging you why it is good for your health with nonsensical scientific data + sell you the drug solution with the left hand, advising you why you should take it, or else you won't live long.

We are in a crazy world.

Oliver is one hell of a reason you should never ignore people regardless of the show they put on.

But wait, Oliver.

What where you doing here at Saltburn?

People may be quiet but they have well-shaped tiny missiles lined beneath their sleeves.

He had a mission and he was not loud about it. Never carried anyone along. Just himself alone.

A master strategist who spends time within the coffers of his coven, to think, making plans, and scheming possible ways to reach his target, interact with his target, and make them love him to the moon.

That was Oliver.

An ambitious young man whose aim is to wrestle Lucifer on his throne and take the lead in hatred, envy, maliciousness, and, untamed ferocity.

So calm. So gentle a man.

Thinking far ahead of his innocent victim, like a viper camouflaged within the long thin slender grasses waiting for its prey.

He never misses. So on point. Always in a good position to cause mayhem. And always available to clean up the mess through deceit and feigned innocence.

The viper didn't go unnoticed. But the observers and prey weren't as cunning, as dangerous, and as predatory as the predator.

Oliver, the evil genius was far ahead of them. Using subtlety and confusion to render his enemies powerless while presenting himself as the next thing close to paradise.

Oliver is full of unknown antipathy. A seething cauldron of jealousy and hatred.

He wanted Saltburn. And he was calm enough to plot his way to the end. Using one of the best war strategies to claim his glory - The infiltration method.

Pretend to be friends with your enemy. Let them welcome you to their abode without any suspicion. When the whole house feels relaxed, you strike. You make the chaos untraceable to you by diversion.

Now Saltburn belongs to him. He owns Saltburn.

Who can stop him?

Oliver is one hell of a reason you should never ignore people regardless of the show they put on.

But wait, Oliver.

What where you doing here at Saltburn?

People may be quiet but they have well-shaped tiny missiles lined beneath their sleeves.

He had a mission and he was not loud about it. Never carried anyone along. Just himself alone.

A master strategist who spends time within the coffers of his coven, to think, making plans, and scheming possible ways to reach his target, interact with his target, and make them love him to the moon.

That was Oliver.

An ambitious young man whose aim is to wrestle Lucifer on his throne and take the lead in hatred, envy, maliciousness, and, untamed ferocity.

So calm. So gentle a man.

Thinking far ahead of his innocent victim, like a viper camouflaged within the long thin slender grasses waiting for its prey.

He never misses. So on point. Always in a good position to cause mayhem. And always available to clean up the mess through deceit and feigned innocence.

The viper didn't go unnoticed. But the observers and prey weren't as cunning, as dangerous, and as predatory as the predator.

Oliver, the evil genius was far ahead of them. Using subtlety and confusion to render his enemies powerless while presenting himself as the next thing close to paradise.

Oliver is full of unknown antipathy. A seething cauldron of jealousy and hatred.

He wanted Saltburn. And he was calm enough to plot his way to the end. Using one of the best war strategies to claim his glory - The infiltration method.

Pretend to be friends with your enemy. Let them welcome you to their abode without any suspicion. When the whole house feels relaxed, you strike. You make the chaos untraceable to you by diversion.

Now Saltburn belongs to him. He owns Saltburn.

Who can stop him?

See Oliver:
https://twitter.com/baba_cave/status/1739995422977126909?t=tJ2rHnU_NN_es0jQNhY8aw&s=19

Hedgefunds:


Egbeda

Truth is that I don't know much places in Lagos.

It is well.

Thanks anyways.

But before the new season wear out, I will find my way there.

Well done, chief.

Hedgefunds:


Hia... Very far

Where do you stay?

Hedgefunds:
@CaveAdullam where in lag u reside ?

...

Hedgefunds:


You in Lagos ??

...

Hedgefunds:


Merry Xmas My oga. I for like invite you for new year ooh.

Would have loved to meet you, big chief.

Probably, distance will be an obstacle.

Anyways.

PS: Don't log out from your account. If you do, you can't log in.

PS: The error has been resolved.

It's women that decides if a relationship will hold or not. That's the only greatest advantage they have over men. Thanks to mother nature.

A woman will remain with you if she sees you as her crown. Though they are immature in deep matters and how to forge along, however, their inputs matters. Whichever way they turn to can make or mar a relationship.

That's why as a man, you need settle down and scrutinize the kind of woman you'll want to spend a long-term relationship with.

If she's not feeling you, she isn't. She has her reasons. Maybe sexual incompatibility. Maybe a change of decision. Maybe a better suitor. Maybe. Maybe.

You don't need to force or persuade her to start feeling something again.

If she's no longer interested there's nothing you can do. If you eventually succeed to beg her to come back, you'll end up being the only one in the relationship.

She has already stated her reason. At least she's fair and sincere enough.

I don't know her level of investment in the relationship. But a woman who has invested much in a relationship and truly loves her man will help him when problem arises rather than come up with nonsensical reasons. That's what relationship in the normal sense ought to be, but unfortunate that it has been bastardized by the cynics, the immature, and id!ots.

Bro, I know you've invested much in the relationship. But see it as a price you needed to pay to understand the content of the women you intend to marry.

She has made her decision. Let her be.

Take your L. And move on.

Thanks.

Good day, Mr Seun/Nairaland moderators.

I just received a message from a productive nairalander that he has been unable to log into his account since yesterday.

Just imagine being unable to celebrate Christmas with his virtual family.

Please, help look into this and notify us about the problem and incoming solution.

Thanks.

Merry Christmas and a prosperous new year.

Cc.
Justwise
mynd44.
mukina2
lordZOUGA
DisGuy
OAM4J
dominique
Rocktation
farano

Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year to all the chiefs and everyone in the house.

And to those "ogas" that are hiding their faces:

Pansophist
Ubunja
Ichidodo
Someonelsechild2
Smartb0y
Martinez39s
Nerostealth01
Tonnyray
Skepticus
Hedgefunds
Jeshal
Pukalolo
Saviolamemphix
Lordray
Adambeatz...

I'm still searching for them.

And to my sweet precious followers...you all are great.

Tensazangetsu20, I can see your doings and good info.
("I say make I put hand where you put hand, now hot water don burn me".

Well done, boss.

Thank you all for the mentions and encouragement.

chariisGRACE:
Merry Christmas to:

CaveAdullam
Pansophist

Same to you, chief.

And a prosperous new year ahead.

"Pansophist still dey sleep. He never wake up".

Thanks.

I have never seen a lean man with "man boobs".

Gynecomastia which is a result of hormonal imbalance is common among overweight men.

Dear friend, are you overweight?

If yes, you need to start an intensive exercise routine.

Only consider the need for surgery when a good exercise and diet plan fails. Meanwhile, you need to follow this tradition for 3 - 5 years.

Don't out of impatience, laziness, and ignorance offer yourself as a clinical specimen.

Thanks.

Life does happen.

Love is a thing that can jack you up one moment, and make you feel on top of the world because you're with someone who you think is your perfect match and your soulmate.

Then boom! Love takes you on a rollercoaster down the route of lamentations, pain, and tears because the one who prophesies love to you, your so-called soulmate isn't feeling the the vibe any longer.

Such is life.

You feel pained the most because you've invested much in her. Emotional support, comfort, financial support, morale, and intellectual support...all inside the drain. I know how you feel. It pains.

But such is life.

See your past relationship as a prerequisite for understanding a good relationship, identifying one from the onset, how to manage it, and how to know where the deviating lines cross to know whether to salvage or terminate it.

There are still many young women better than your ex-girlfriend. Just assume you've never dated before, and now entering into the dating market, however, with a repertoire of knowledge to help you navigate your path.

Calm your nerves. Let your mind be at rest.

Observe keenly this time around and take control of love. Now not where it leads you, but where you want it to go.

Go out. Give room for other women. The good ones that find you worthy and as their favorite choice will invest in the relationship and try to make every journey a memorable one.

And with time you'll forget about your ex.

Your ex-girlfriend is now in the past. Let it be so.

Time will fade her out of your memory only if you don't pray and wish her to come back.

And in the name of whatever you believe, if by chance she reaches an epiphany to come back, please, DON'T TAKE HER BACK! You are not a sanitary pad. Neither are you a trash bucket.

Let her go. You'll be fine.

Thanks.

Hedgefunds:


Thank You ...NL is back...

Loool.

At last "our mind don touch ground".

Welcome back o.

Hedgefunds:


Reason I ask, I have 2 cousins with same issue as Anthonia, And I almost wept after reading the Story...I know what they are going through.

Ouch.

Sorry to hear that.

With proper medical treatment, they can live well.

Well done.

Hedgefunds:


My boss, I hail ooh. Was the Anthonia issue real?

Anthonia.

Lol.

Since you're a senior man, I will not keep you in suspense.

Anthonia's story is fictional.

Winks.

Hedgefunds:


First to be here Boss

Senior man.

Well done, big chief.

I couldn’t sleep throughout that night.

My experience was not what I imagined. My quest for pleasure has landed me in a deep, dark pit.

I couldn’t find my way. I was lost.

I don’t believe in God. But at that moment between life and death, I could sense my inner man making piety and promises to a deity. All I wanted was help.

That night, it was cold. It rained all through. But the perspiration I was drenched in seemed as if I were putting on wet, washed clothes. Cascades of sweat were dripping from my armpits. My chest was a lake of sweat. Sweats were dripping from my groins, flowing through my thighs to the floor, where my shaking legs were positioned.

It was when I scratched my left thigh that I discovered that what covered my groin regions was my Tommy Hilfiger boxers. I remember quickly putting on a white polo shirt when the tragedy struck. I never knew it was mere imagination that I was wearing a trouser.

I and Anthonia grew up in the neighborhood of Adesuwa, in Benin City. It was close to the New Benin market. It is bubbling with various activities. Life in the city was exhilarating and humorous. Our neighborhood features all kinds of good, bad, and ugly situations. Adesuwa is a strong name in the city that has powerful traces of the Oba’s palace.

My family shares some similarities with Anthonia’s. The major difference is the complexion: my parents are dark, and Anthonia’s parents are light. Our fathers were ambitious bricklayers who struggled for clients during the day at Iyaro and had fun at the beer parlor every evening after work. Our mothers were petty traders along the market road.

We attended the same Oguola grammar school, which is not very far from our houses. We were in the same class too. Both of us find ourselves in the market to help our mothers after school. This was a routine that strengthened our bonds until people started calling us husband and wife. But as timid and naïve kids, we never knew what they meant. We were just living our lives.

It was during our common entrance registration that I discovered that Anthonia was 2 years older than me. We were of the same height and stature. We even looked like fraternal twins. I always claimed to be the boss and acted as boys ought to act in school and on the playground. I thought I was older than her, or at least in the same age category, but I was wrong. Immediately after that discovery, I made sure I hid my age from her.

As time passes, Anthonia begins to grow into a mature woman. I still can’t fathom how her maturity took place. Because it seemed she grew into an adolescent in a single night with nice curves at appropriate angles. She grew to become more beautiful. Her face shines like day.

In the beginning, I never had any feelings for her. We saw ourselves as normal “paddy paddy.” From afar, many thought we were siblings. We were partners in crime. Always scheming ways to steal our mothers’ biscuits and chocolates from the containers they stored and displayed in the market.

The first time I lusted over her body was when she was 17. That day was Friday, a public holiday. I woke up so excited, and in less than an hour, I was done with house chores. It was 8 a.m. My parents have already dispersed to their place of work. The only thing left for me was to eat and either play or have some rest. However, my legs were swift toward Anthonia’s house. The house was boring at that time. I couldn’t wait to eat. I dash to go meet Anthonia. When I arrived at their house, she was filling their large drum of water outside. Though this round of fetching filled the drum. She instructed me to wait for her outside as she went to fetch water for the last time. I obligated.

I sighted her from afar when she was coming, so I began to position myself to help bring down the bucket of water from her head. When she got close, I stood up. As I stretched my two hands to help her, she also supported the bucket with her hands. Unfortunately for her, her wrapper untied at the left side of her arm, where she had hooked it tightly.

The disappearance of the wrapper from her body tends to reduce the pace at which the bucket of water left her head to the ground. I stared from her apple-like breasts to her scarcely hairy pubic region carefully positioned between her sculpted curved thighs as I assisted her with the bucket to the ground, and when it finally landed, it was with the velocity of light that she wrapped herself back. I was dumbfounded. The only statement she made was, "C'mon, will you close your eyes? Small boy like you.”

That scene lasted in my memory for some days but later evaporated. Things were still normal for both of us.

Six months after that incident, Anthonia and her parents relocated to Warri. Before their departure, I overheard her mother telling my mother that her brother-in-law had just completed a big mansion in Warri town and insisted his younger brother, Oghene, Anthonia’s father, come to live with him. I felt pained. I will miss Anthonia and her family. We didn’t even bid each other farewell because the day they departed, I was in school.

Our lives continued in different spheres, unknown to each other.

But fate brought us back together. But instead of recreating childhood memories, it turned into hours of horror—a memory that will be the last to disappear from my mind.

I was scrolling through Facebook when I saw the beautiful pictures of Anthonia and her mother scattered throughout the timeline. I never doubted it. I knew it was Anthonia. My guess was right when I sent her a DM, and we began to familiarize ourselves. The last time we saw each other was 9 years ago.

She has grown into a mature woman and now owns a cosmetic shop. She was still based in Warri.

I was in my final year, 400L, studying political science when our paths crossed. And ever since that moment, our calls and chats have been long, like Mississippi. Those series of conversations led to infatuation and lust. I reminded her of the day her wrapper was untied, and now imagine having her body to myself. She laughed hysterically on the call.

A series of chats and calls led to an agreement on a date we would meet. She planned to come on Saturday and leave on Sunday morning. I was so glad to hear that because that Sunday was the eve of my final exams.

It was not because of women that I insisted on staying off campus, even though my parents insisted I stay in the school hostel. I wanted peace. I wanted my space. Notwithstanding, I fantasized about bringing women to my home.

The week that was pregnant with Anthonia’s arrival was filled with anxiety and hope. I deciphered ways to scheme my parents for extra funds so that I could be able to make her stay enjoyable. Friday night was the height of it. I prayed that the electricity supply would remain as it was because I knew that was the only disappointment I couldn’t handle as I didn’t have an alternative source of power and electricity.

Our chit-chat on Friday was abrupt. She gave her assurance that she was coming. I woke up at intervals all through the night to check the time. In the first interval, I woke up by 11 p.m., even though I had slept by 10 p.m. I woke up at 1 a.m., 4 a.m., and 5 a.m. subsequently. The last was at 7 a.m. I couldn’t go back to sleep. I had to add the final touches and start preparing a nice meal for her—white rice and beans and turkey stew.

I received a call from her by 8 a.m. She informed me that her bus just moved out of the park to Benin. I was glad to hear that. Immediately I dropped the phone, did 50 push-ups within seconds, and zoomed back to the kitchen.

By 10:30 a.m., she called again to say that she had landed at Ugbowo Motor Park and that I should come to pick her up. Within me, I screamed, “Yes, the hour has arrived!’’.

The transportation fare from where I was to her location was #100 using public transport. But the excited man in me boarded a cab to and fro, which ended in me spending #1200. I didn’t care either.

She was welcomed by the blended aroma from the kitchen and the morning freshener odor. She was in a trance for a few seconds when she finally entered.

Antonia was still as playful as in her juvenile days. We had long conversations about life and family. I told her about school. She told me about the life of a female entrepreneur. At that moment, I just wanted to marry her and be with her forever.

We ate. We played the Monopoly game. We fell into a deep sleep when we couldn’t continue with the Africa Magic movie. She woke up earlier than me and had her bath. I had my bath later, and I took her on a tour around some beautiful places in my surroundings. Our fun would have lasted past 9 p.m. if not for the change in weather. It started drizzling slowly; we quickly boarded a motorcycle that took us back to the house.

We resumed watching TV as we feasted on the barbecue beef and juice we prepared before leaving the house.

It was this time that I needed to act as a “sharp guy” and bold man. I drew closer to her; she was sitting beside me on my right side. I placed my right hand across her neck. Her hair smelled nice, and her body wasn’t only lustrous but perfumed.

I could hear the silent throbbing of my heart as I whispered words of romantic adulation into her ear canal. She acted timid. Her eyes were still fixed on the TV.

As I caressed her hair, I began to summon the courage to go further. I drew closer to her and closed the little gap between us. My right hand left her hair and traveled to her shirtless right arm. My palm grazed her skin, and my fingers massaged her pores, sending waves of erotic signals into her.

By this time, I had already gathered all my courage. Simultaneously, my left hand crept to the red button on the TV remote as my lips merged with hers in a profound kiss. She responded gently, as our lips were locked for seconds. In that position, she gradually relaxed her back on the long sofa chair we were sitting in.

I took her up after some time and pulled off her clothes. Lo, and behold, her magnificent breasts. It was much bigger and more rounded than the first time I saw them nine years ago. My left hand quickly unhooked her bra. I still don’t know how I learned that skill. Her boobs were set free; behold the wonders of nature.

I could hear her heartbeat. My lips were on her right nipple, while my left hand was on her head and my right hand was on her left breast. I was in a haste to fulfill my imagination. I noticed her right hand trying to unleash my pipe. I paused, stood up, and allowed her to unzip my trousers. We were both in our boxers now. She wanted to fall back to the chair, but I quickly held her, lifted her from the ground, and walked majestically to the bedroom.

A few seconds after we landed on the bed, she started shaking. At first, I thought she was lost in romance and enjoying the pre-intimacy. She became unresponsive as the shaking continued, and excitement departed from her face. She was now acting strange, and her face turned pale. Her pupils vanished from the center space in her eyes.

I tried calming her down. I ran to get her water, but she couldn’t drink it. It eventually spilled on the bed. I increased the speed of the standing fan and brought it closer to her. Yet her problem wasn’t repressed.

I have lost my erection this time. My d1ck strung like a polyethylene threw inside the fire. I was lost in confusion.

I touched her cheeks gently to restore her, but all to no avail. I kept asking her what was wrong but got no response. I was extremely nervous this time. I screamed for help, but the heavy thunderstorm and raindrops on the roofs of my neighbors obliterated every sound coming out of my room.

Anthonia was unconscious at this moment. Half naked on my bed. A stream of tears started rolling down my eyes. I thought of running away, but I remembered I had my final exams around the corner. I thought of bundling her to an unknown place, but I feared being caught. I was scared. I was lost. I was confused.

I quickly put on my shirt and ran to Tunde’s apartment. Luckily for me, I saw him bending the knob of his door as he proceeded to enter. I fell on my knee and begged him to come to my rescue. He was shocked and confused, like me. He asked me what was wrong, but I couldn’t muster a coherent statement. I was stammering as I tried explaining. I was dragging him to my apartment as I find words to explain.

When he got inside my room, he was shocked. His eyes almost popped out of his head. He knelt, felt her pulse, and told me she was still alive but needed to be taken to the hospital immediately. We boarded for a bolt and, within 10 minutes, arrived at the scene. We both carried Anthonia to the nearest hospital.

At the hospital, I was screaming, lamenting, and cursing that day. My palms were locked on top my head which was shaking in regret. My eyes stared intermittently at Anthonia, hoping for her complete restoration. Within me, I have already canceled the intention of any sexual intercourse now and in the future.

Anthonia finally regained consciousness at 11 a.m. on Sunday. That was all I was praying for. I even forgot I had my final exams the next day.
She was diagnosed with generalized tonic-clonic (GTC) seizures. Later, I became ambivalent: happy for her convalescence but sad losing a lot of money to medical bills. She helped sort out some of the bills, though.

I scolded her for not informing me about her medical condition. She said she didn’t because if she had told me, I wouldn’t have allowed her into my home. And it has hindered her from having a genuine relationship. However, the seizure occurs once in a blue moon. I was enraged at that moment. But I had to keep it cool, and pitied her.

She was discharged from the hospital on Monday afternoon, spent the remaining part of that day in my house, and traveled back to Warri on Tuesday morning.

I’m still reevaluating a chance with Anthonia. It seems I love her and will take the risk to be with her. However, I am scared.

Now, I’m just hoping I got a good grade on my last examination because I wrote the exam based on layman’s ideas.

Cc. Hedgefunds, Tonnyray, et al.,

Hedgefunds:


First to be here Boss

Senior man.

Well done, chief.

Let me see if I can make it 25 harshest lessons:

Opening: we will all die. In the deepest part of our hearts, we know all these struggles aren't worth it. It all ends in death. But we must struggle.

Ok. Let's go:

1. Family background is a determinant of success. Success is ultra slim when you are raised in a poor household.

2. Time spent is time gone. Wasted time rolls with streams of tears and regrets.

3. At adulthood, love becomes conditional.
Your family still loves you deeply. However, love is now predicated on what you can do.

4. You'll always reminisce about childhood. Because the tales of adulthood aren't what you're currently experiencing.

5. Independence is expensive.

6. You'll always act like Patrov's dog when you are trying to find your feet.

7. You are at the mercy of the rich man when you are sitting down like Lazarus on his table.

8. As things get difficult for you, the distance between you and the people who say they love you expands.

9. When you are low and poor, you're deemed nothing. You are seen as a worthless fellow.

10. The metric for success in the eyes of the average man is luxury. You'll face bigger challenges when trying to pass your wisdom when you're poor.

11. The amount of respect accorded to you is status-inclined. That's average human for you.

12. Things don't always go as planned.

13. No matter how disciplined and faithful you are, when life wants to fvck you, it does so hard and at the worst and painful orifice.

14. You may be a victim of an attack or a victim of an offense not committed. You may be a victim of the recklessness of others. Your freedom is one luck away from.

15. Nobody is coming to help you.

16. If you want help in life, you must offer help to people.

Don't say you are too poor and empty. Leverage your poverty.

17. Poor people are irritants to the well-to-do.

Even if you are at the bottom of the hierarchy, don't abandon your life to it. Relaxation at the bottom is where the irritation oozes from.

18. Appearance matters. If you don't look presentable, beautiful, and appealing to the two naked eyes, you'll be treated poorly.

19. You become a pain in the ass if you always beg.

Do you want help? Offer your little help first.

20. You alone are on this track to your destination.

Others would love to help you had it been they didn't have any mission.

But life is a race. Everyone is on the track. So don't get upset when you don't hear from others.

21. It's the people you don't expect help from that will eventually emancipate you.

But you'll spend the whole of your time with people you are familiar with but will render little or no help.

22. No one is gonna teach you how to live life. You have to discover that for yourself.

23. Life is a jungle. You must acclimatize to the field to understand the ways of beasts and predators.

24. Those who fail to follow their guts live with regrets thereafter. Never fail to take the risk. However, be wise and pragmatic.

25. It takes extra time and work, and great difficulty to become a balanced man, a man of honor and integrity, a man of strength and valor, a man whose reputation echoes when being called.

If you want to become such a man, be ready to do the extraordinary. Be ready to walk in the dark. Be ready to walk alone. Be ready to walk a long boring distance.

Bonus:

26. Only you can sustain the fire burning inside of you. Don't get tired.

27. Success isn't guaranteed for anybody.

But you must be optimistic enough to make trials. You may not get what you want, however, will move from where you used to be.

28. It's faster to get your needs and satisfaction if you offer your soul on the altar of materialism and falsehood. It comes at a cost though.

29. Everybody talks about the truth. But they are under the covers of lies, treachery, betrayals, deceit, manipulations, and falsehood to fulfill their dreams.

Thanks.

HabitNow App looks promising.

Sweet features: reminder, notes, alarm. Above all, you can monitor your success.

This will be a big challenge for me because I'm used to mental notes. And I believe I should hold myself accountable sans an accountability app or partner.

Anyway, the new year calls for a great shift.

Kudos man.

iLegendd:
Great input. You write so well. Writing 20 books in 20 hours won't be a challenge to you. If you get stressed, you switch to ChatGPT.

Thanks.

You are the master.

You lead. We follow.

No jokes.

"abeg gimme me mentee ticket naw"

This is kinda funny.

In my mind: she want to quickly secure the bag should in case he didn't come out alive.

Anyway, this is a prove that nothing can stop both of them from getting married at that specific time. Both just want to prove their love for each other.

But there shouldn't be haste since they've known each other.

Happy married life, though.

Solid post.

I knew you were preparing something "hooge" when you were absent for some time.

We will have goals to fulfill till death. Knowing how to plan and set the right goals and placing mediums on achieving them is key to long-term happiness. All goals can't be fulfilled, but the ones we are able will be great contributions to mankind.

What stops the modern average man from achieving his goals is the basics of survival. They include food, shelter, constant electricity, and data.

Once these factors are present throughout learning and self-development, many will achieve their goals in a much quicker time than expected.

It will not be easy to pull along when you're still struggling with the basics. It creates hurdles, takes a large chunk of time to figure out, and keeps you distracted.
This is the cause of loss of morale and motivation after 2/3 months of relentless pursuit. At a point, you just break down and say "Fvck it". Then slowly, retract to your former position or remain stagnant.

Setting goals is important. But we must consider controllable factors that hinder us from achieving our goals. If these factors are fixed and optimized, moving onward will not be explicitly sleek, however, maneuvering will be easy.

It takes deliberate consciousness to write down goals. However, it takes great faith to remain firm when things get tougher in the process of achieving set goals.
Those with strong foundations + provisions will survive compared to those who have nothing.

If a rich man's son has the same goals as you and + the same attitude to hit the bull's eye, he will succeed and move faster than you that struggle for your basic needs.

Inevitable factors are there. They both limit and propel. But we must make do with what we have and in whatever positive way we can.

I have always had a mental note of my goals. Using this week to conclude the last part of the 2023 resolution. Insha Allah.

However, with the gleanings from this thread, I'm moved to convert mental notes into physical notes for 2024 goals.

PS: SideChick accountability app looks promising. Because you can have access to other accountable partners. So when your partner is absent, the app is present.

PS: Can no longer find SideChick app on play store.

So, I'm sticking to Productive Habit tracker.

HabitNow is my second choice.

Well done, ILegendd.

I know OP belongs to the camp of "it goes both ways. It's vice-versa. What's good for the goose is also good for the gander".

You all think that inter-sexual dynamics are words and synonyms. Anyway, your topic even proved it wrong.

Back in the hunter-gatherer's days exchange wasn't based on fiat. Here was how women benefitted from men and even up till today.

Being married or in a relationship:

1. Brings the woman respect from all and sundry. It separates her from the girls and puts her in the league of women regardless of her age.

2. Placed the woman on the same level as the man. A peasant girl can become a queen because of her marriage to a king.

3. Extends the hands of the man to her immediate and extended family. For protection and provision. Strongmen are a sought-after species of humans.

4. Protects the woman from danger and predators. That's why women don't like weak men. Because women are weak and need a stronger force - masculinity to protect them.

5. To help her do difficult work. Men can do all women's jobs. But not vice-versa.

So, if by chance she comes across difficult work, her husband or spouse is there to help her.

6. Family name. Women don't bear their husband's name for nothing. A name associated with status is an identity that sets her apart when she steps outside.

7. She can decide to be nothing. But having a man will grant most of her desires. You've heard of "stay-at-home mum or full-time housewife, right?"

8. Reproduction is expedient for both. However, a man can cater for a woman and her child. And not vice-versa, else, chaos in the family.

Even in the absence of money, the man ought to defend them. Thereby extending the lineage of the woman.

9. Men bear the burden of proof. There is hope that a man can become a recognizable force, and he must work hard because it's expedient for him.

It's not to prove society right, but that a man feels worthless when he is at the bottom of life - lacks power, authority, and resources.

Nobody expects anything tangible from women. Only let her be gentle, kind, and feminine. Unfortunately, these are characteristics of nice guys who are tortured by women and men.

Being with the man will compel him to do and become better, which benefits her too.

10. The presence of a man in a woman's life proves her feminine power. The woman who isn't able to "tame" a man is a woman who will suffer shame ridicule, and bullying.

Summarily: a woman can't be strong enough for herself. The man is her stronghold and defense.

Thanks.