₦airaland Forum

pretend to be an introvert.
Next!!!!!!!

No matter how stone cold a man's heart may be, at the right time and with the right woman, he will fall in love.

If its working for you now, good for you then.

Don't worry about falling in love. It's overrated and when the time comes, things will take its natural course. Stop being bitter about the past.

Just my opinion

women r sluts

It doesn't matter if the ex regrets her decision or not. The guy is not a sweater she can just decide if she wants to put on or not.
Once you have broken up with someone, the person if free to date whosoever they desire as long as its mutual with whoever they choose. You don't owe each other anything.

It's just advisable to avoid complications by dating someone close to your ex to avoid complications. In my experience, the ex's friends or sisters is usually a good target for revenge sex. tho . Even that can go anywhere.

So its not wrong, its just not advisable. Even though it is not advisable, it is still workable.

PS - it doesn't matter who broke up with who.

No.
You are free to date whoever you want. Even her sister.

Every day that goes on without your cousin knowing is just plain evil.
You should go see her and tell her ASAP.

If the guy is there, that's even better.
Make sure your cousin knows whats going on too.

If you are too chicken to tell her yourself, invite her to your mom's and let her do the talking.

No matter what you do, it will be painful. But it gets more painful as time goes by.

One more thing, ask yourself this: if you were your friend, what would you want your best friend to do?

srry.
I think its too late for that. Did you pour in her?

Marriage working depends on the two people in it not on ethnic backgrounds.
Your marriage will be what you make of it and how you handle issues that come up.

Tosinville:
Deniyor

I'll let u know wife is absolutely diff from gf, just tell me how would u feel a guy walk up to u & introduce himself as ur wife ex and he'd love to be ur friend?

Yes it can be different if you are not serious with the gf. For comparison purposes, lets say it's a gf that I'm very serious and exclusive with.
Then it does not make a difference if she is a wife or gf as the only thing that really seperates the two is the paper. And some people are not so keen on marriage anyways.

If I can stand a gf's ex, then I can stand the same ex when I'm married to her. I won't suddenly go nuts just cos I just married her. My rule is simple with any friend of my lady - there are boundaries and I trust she can handle herself and she knows what she is doing. Also she knows the consequences of her actions.

If a guy walks to me and introduces me as my wife's ex, no biggie. My gain is his loss and he belongs to the past. If I like the guy no probs.

The only issue I have with it (either gf or wife) is the way he might introduce himself. Depending on how he does it, a guy introducing himself with a reference to having sexual relations with your partner can be insulting.

It depends on the guy.
Virgin ladies are another crazy set of ladies. Its a tough learning curve there.

very funny

;d ;d

It's actually not that different btw men and women.
Most men can not stand other men who have had intimate relations with their lady
Most women can not stand other women who have had intimate relations with their man.

TosinV you will be deluded to think its different for men and women.

Some people can stand it, others can not.
As for me, I don't know. I have dated a lady whose exes I was friends with. Just one of those annoying love triangles etc. I have also had relations with a friend's ex b4. I learnt a lot from those experiences that I'm sure I do not want to experience such complications again.

As of my current gf, its much simpler and with peace of mind. No complications and no friends with ex or anything of the sort.

It depends on personality thing - sometimes based on previous experience.

ok

What kind of priest? Catholic? Anglican? Pentecostal? Mormon?

Religion is very important in most relationships. In Nigeria, we have not yet gotten to the stage where we can say it is not important.
How many inter religious relationships do w have so far? Not enough to influence the others yet. Muslims and christians wont marry cos their religion advises them not to do so.
There is a lot of religous intolerance in naija so far that is is ridi ulous and wrong.


Even in the christian religion there are so many divisions that we antagonise each other.
It is wrong but it is what it is.

No way to judge without seeing the picture.

It might have to do with your looks.
On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 gorgeous 1 - hideous) how ugly are you?

Given the attachment many ladies have towards their first guys, a first guy has the most chance to make it happen. Assuming the guy is in it for the long haul (not some quick chop and go type), if he is patient and strong, he should be influence it happening.

Anything is possible but only time will tell.
In today's world, a woman who has been with less than two men is like a needle in a hay stack.

Reduce the attention you give to her, and when you see her coming in one day, pretend to pray out loud that God should help you choose btw her and the beautiful ex gf that really wants to marry you. Pray that God will let one of them show her bad behaviour now so you can get rid of her.

lwkmd

What will be will be. Forget the whole shine your eyes thingy. Let things take its natural course while you watch. It will let you know the real character of the lady you are with. It's a win win situation.

If she falters to the ex, you win as you get off b4 you commit yourself too deeply
If she handles her self with grace, you get a good partner - win too.

I pity the guy who decides to marry a woman whose heart is with another man. Avoid those women who marry you just for the sake of marriage or getting married.

Probably too late now but I'll give my own 50c anyways

In my opinion, most naija guys are not so keen on taking breaks. Of course there is the ocassional fights where you both don't talk to each other for a while and then you make up. Apart from those, most wouldn't sit down and say they want to take a break. In my experience, when a naija guy says he wants to take a break, what he really means is - he doesn't want the relationship anymore but he either doesn't want to break your heart or he wants to leave room for shagging later when if things don't work out with the new flings he was looking into. Hell, most will even go for the new fling without bothering breaking up with you.

But if you must take a break in a relationship, be sure to sit down and discuss the full terms of the break such as:
1. Is it a break or a break up?
2. If it is a break, how long is the break?
3. Are we allowed to see anyone else during the break?
4. Hell, are we allowed to sleep with anyone else during the break?
5. What is the purpose or what do you plan to achieve with the break?
6. What next after the break? Do we automatically continue or do we sit down after the break to consider if we continue or not?
7. And for the FB savvy ones, should we change our fb status to single, complicated etc?

That should always be defined during a break. So no one gets angry or jealous (no guarantees anyways) when smth happens during the break or the break is really a break up.
I think by now you should hv made up with your boo or esle you are courting with danger.

Good luck

To deal with this kind of issues, what you really need is trust. Trust that your lady can handle her biz and does not need you stepping in all the time.
Let her handle it without your interference. If she is yours, she will get rid of the guy in her own way.
I think she will and you will avoid being controlling.

The ex is desperate as you can see. He hasnt let go yet and is hurting. Your woman is probably trying to free hi as gently as she can. I bet she is been harsh to him only cos you are listening, so back off a bit.
Good luck

There will be quite a lot of guys after him.

Her current guy is screwing his ex. That's why the ex is still being kept around.