₦airaland Forum

midnighter:
If its healthy its supposed to taste salty with sweet undertones

If you take alcohol it will be more bitter

How did you know all this?

Offpoint:
one of the game lyrics That's why Kanye wears the Jesus pieces, cuz that's Jesus people

God can truly change anyone, we the rap music lovers all know Kanye and Jesus story.
Lil Wayne says Is there heaven for Gs soldier? I can't go to hell cuz I'll take over

I hope he lives long, cuz once you leave Illuminati, they'll take you out.

...............
Someone should tell that BBQ grill dude to stop masturbating on this thread, look at how his roaming around like a confused pregnant rat trying it's best to be noted with bolded font. this guy needs help.

You should hope he lives well. What is longer or better than eternity in heaven?

Bro don't sweat it and be desperate. Just do the best you can and keep praying objectively about it. I can assure you that whatever will be the final outcome, will be to your own favour.

Fountainofyouth:
Not only when married, there are some sperm that can make you increase in the right places, those men are to die for, the ones that drain the life out of you are bad omen, those type of men should be avoided like plague.

How many have you tasted? Hmm.

IceColdVeins:
Now this is the most embarassing of all I have seen today

It will be until you read that of CRAZYMAN. Mehn, I literally had tears in my eyes because of laughter.

CrazyMan:
Hmm

Mine happened years back...when I was still a student. I was in year one then and it was on the day of our induction, when we'll be formally introduced to the department.

My HOD, Professors, Docs...my fellow year one coursemates, final years and excos etc in the department were all present...

So as the program went on, our association (Dept) president said it's time for some entertainment and that if anyone of us has a joke to keep the athmosphere lively he should come and get the mic.

Without thinking twice I got up, came to the front and collected the mic from him....then all hell was let loose. I started giving my jokes, the whole auditorium became quiet. As quiet as a church whose pastor is preaching about hell and rapture, and how you'll burn for all eternity in the lake of fire and brimestone.

My jokes turned to sermon, the only difference was that I wasn't using a Bible...I kept on talking and talking believing that I'll will at least hit the jackpot then they'll laugh, and I'll use that opportunity to redeem myself and sign out. Forwhere...

Everyone's eyes was glued to me as though I was some weird creature that just crawled out of the grave...my hands were shaking as I grabbed the mic, I was sweating all over, my voice trembled and I began to stammer...I was wishing that the earth should just open up and swallow me. All the beautiful girls in the dept were just staring at me while I kept fooling myself with the hope that they'll at least smile.

My HOD and lecturers eyes were all fixed on me, I felt like explaining my jokes over and over again to them so that at least they might giggle in case they didn't get it the first time...

After trying in vain to hit the jackpot, our president told me to give him the mic and go back to my seat. That was when our HOD got up and gave me one funny nickname which I will not mention here for reason best known to me....after the nickname prouncement by my HOD, the whole auditorium bursted into a very deep mockery laughter. I tried to safe face by smiling sheepshily. Unfortunately that name stuck on me till I graduated as most people never bothered to know my real name.

The only achievement of that calamity is that it made me popular in the department...all the lecturers, my HOD, even girls all knew me. Even though I failed woefully at comedy I became a local champion.

Guy what is wrong with you na? Do you want me to embarrass myself with laughter in the office?

Kelvin30286063:
I never thought I'll never share my own cuz I don't want to remember it but I will. Maybe sharing it will help me heal from that painful embarrassment.
We were suppose to have this group presentation at 300L and as always I was group leader. Naturally group leaders will present the topic to the class and the lecturers and the lecturer in charge of the course will award mark to everyone in the group based on the group's performance in the presentation and individual contribution to the assignment.
I don't have problem presenting, Infact I've done that all my school years. I was always group leader so I always present except if the lecturer opted otherwise but that particular course was not my favorite and I don't know nada in it. Infact I hated it so much that I only pick the note whenever I'm trying to sleep and it's not coming. I'll start reading it then sleep go catch me.

Knowing fully well that I was going to present the topic, I decided to cheat. What I did was simple (or so I thought until everything scattered) I recorded all the presentation paper on my phone, bought an earphone and thought to myself that I'll just play it and listen to it while I repeat after it.
To be fair, I practiced it at home several times that I had even memorized all the words and I should have just used that but I was bent on doing what I planned.
D-day came, class was full cuz presentation is always like a test. The marks are awarded and they represent your test.
I got to the stage and played the recording (did as if I wanted to adjust my phone)
Na so wahala start oo. Lecturer was like... What's the topic of your group... (recording don dey play oo)
I said it, I listen, record don go pass introduction, na so I start to dey stammer.
I should have just removed the earpiece from my ears and see if I'll remember some of the words I memorized when I was practicing my scam but I was bent on catching up with this God forsaken recording that was playing so fast.
At a point, I thought of reaching out to my pocket and pausing it a little so I can catch my breath but already everybody was looking at me with shock written all over their faces and taking out my phone was a bad idea.
Everything just scatter. Luckily, one of the group members noticed that I wasn't myself, he quickly took it from me and started explaining the topic. He should have been made the group leader sef since that was he favourite course but na so dem think say na Kelvin fit do am...

Last last, after presentation, the lecturer looked at me and was like, what is wrong with you?
I said nothing sir. He said then that nothing almost cost your group 30 marks. Everybody in class bursted into laughter.
Funny enough, the recording was still playing, how it manage to still be playing when presentation has ended is what baffled me. I must have recorded it really slowly that even if I was repeating after it, I would have sounded like a big fool.

Guy you funny abeg

Trutherme:
We were both crazily in love years ago. She visited me around 8pm and we agreed that I would take her back home after a quickie.
We both slept off after 'knacking', woke up around 1.30 am. She insisted that she would go home because her dad would kill her.

Well, I stupidly took her home at that time of the day but my problem started while returning to my own home.
Fear came and set in. Suddenly, I began to feel the presence of someone or ghost behind me, following me.

Then, the person or ghost started chasing me. I have never ran faster in my entire life. Till today, I still don't know how I managed to get home.

I have never taken a risk like that in my life. I was tired, stupid, reckless and completely nuts.

Edith, it's still not fair.

Hahahahahaha

okokkk:


I was asking this girl out then. I thought about how to please the girl, so, one evening I called her and asked about her favourite fruit. She said Coconut. Then, I was a hustler in the streets of Aba loading and offloading goods from trucks. For a child of my age, I was very rich. I could make up to N1, 500 a day.


The next day, I went out to hustle so as to get her Coconuts. To cut the story short. I made over N1,300 that day and spent all on Coconuts. I bought about 14 big Coconuts that day, packed them all in a big "Ghana must go bag" and set for her house.

When I got to her house, I called her, gave her the Coconuts and whispered into her ears in Igbo (Aki bekee a gwu, kpo mu gwamu. Aki bekee aman ko gi)"If these ones finish, call me. I will make sure you don't lack Coconuts". She hugged me deeply and that was enough for me and for the day's numerous troubles.

briggson07:
To refuse to go to my hostel after lectures kissing and having fun with my date untill I was slapped by some jealous cultist

Ladycewhy:
so what were you expecting?

It's cool. Please continue. Just wanted you guys to know that I was a witness to how it started

Ladycewhy:
ok

Just like that?! Hmmm Nigeria ladies are changing o

centboy123456:
Bro still don't get it please drop ur what app number

Guy you serious o

superlanny:
i feel for those affected, i know some who have made hotels a temporary abode, we are lucky not to have natural disasters like sunami in Africa, if we did, many will die, our response to disaster is extremely poor and yet what is of concern to our leaders is expensive cars.

Whilst I don't pray for such disasters, I believe necessity is the mother of invention.

Why is the wife changing? Is it the same woman in all the pictures?

QuietHammer:
See swegbe

Anytime I read this your comment it makes me

But on a more serious note though, shooting of shot is allowed na.

That might just be a blind lady

Proudly rookie!

That no 7 though

Pettyprincess:
I hope mine works that way in future sha

Lol. Are you pretty?

Pettyprincess:
The lady really looks beautiful while the husband looks handsome,they definitely gonna make beautiful kids.
I can't wait for mine!!!

I don't think it really works like that though.

OGHENAOGIE:
comot for here abeg... na u go tell me about Bruce... he is more of a Liverpool legend than an African legend simple...

Is that what you understand by the topic?

OGHENAOGIE:
Messi has played 3 copa finals one world cup finals...won Olympic gold... guy don't talk thrash here El hadary won every thing in club football and did marvelous for country.. Thomas nkono is former African best... no use Messi compare this guy abeg

I can see you don't even know about Bruce. Go and learn about him. Until you do, I have nothing else to tell you.

Obierika:
You can't eat the same soup everyday and not get bored at some point!

But you can support the same football club for life.

OGHENAOGIE:
because he played for Liverpool...you forget these five keepers played for club and country..tell me grobella exploit with Zimbabwe...

What he achieved with Liverpool surpasses what most on this list achieved both club and country.

Tell me what Messi has achieved with Argentina, yet he is the best in the world!

cheapgoals:
Goalkeepers are the last line of defense, they orchestrate play from the back and save their teams from conceding whenever possible.

African countries in the past have produced top-class goalkeeper over the past couple of years and as a matter of fact, become role models to European goalkeepers who made them their source of inspiration.

Although the number of African goalkeepers plying their trade in Europe can be counted on the tip of fingers due to competition and lack of opportunities, some paid their dues in the past and broke new grounds for the present generation and fortunately, some of them are still active.

In this write up we take a look at the top 5 African goalkeeping legends in no particular order.


Carlos Kameni (425 Caps)

Country: Cameroon

https://i1.wp.com/cheapgoals.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Carlos-Kameni.jpg?w=710&ssl=1

Although Cameroon may possess a whole lot of goalkeeping legends, Carlos Kameni managed to register his name on the already long list of top goalkeepers to have come out of the Central African country.

Kameni took a tight grip on the number one shirt of the Cameroon national team debuting at the age of 19 and he appeared for the Indomitable Lions in over 70 appearances and made his name in Spanish La Liga where he played for Espanyol and Malaga before he went to Fenerbache.

He featured at three FIFA World Cups and six African Cup of Nations winning the title in 2002 and also runners up finish at the 2003 Confederations Cup after a Gold medal win at the 2000 Sydney Olympics.


Vincent Enyeama ( 607 Caps)

Country: Nigeria

https://i2.wp.com/cheapgoals.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Vincent-Enyeama.jpg?w=639&ssl=1

Recently, Vincent Enyeama insinuated his legendary status by stating he conquered Africa during his playing career and rightly so he did at the club level and on the national team level.

He won the CAF Champions League trophy twice with Enyimba international of Aba in 2003 and 2004 before he took his trade to Europe. He also won the Africa Cup of Nations with the Super Eagles in 2013 after several third-place finishes.

Also, he is known for his goal-scoring trait scoring ten goals at Enyimba and nine for Hapoel Tel Aviv including a couple in their UEFA Champions League sojourn.

The 2010 World Cup in South Africa shot him to world prominence after a spectacular performance against Lionel Messi and Argentina. He also holds the second position on the list of the longest clean sheet record in the French League after going on 11,062 minutes without conceding, a total of 11 games consecutively.

Thomas Nkono ( 637 caps )

Country: Cameroon

https://i0.wp.com/cheapgoals.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Thomas-Nkono-.jpg?resize=768%2C454&ssl=1

N’Kono appeared for the Cameroon national team in three World Cups, and four Africa Cup of Nations tournaments winning the trophy in 1984. The goalkeeper was known for acrobatic saves, the high speed which made him appreciated.

He had over three hundred appearances for Espanyol in over a decade and over 500 in his club career that included Canon Yaounde where he won two CAF Champions League and his last club in Club Bolivia, also had over 100 appearances for the national team.

Nkono became a source of inspiration for the young and upcoming goalkeeper, he returned to his main club as a goalkeeping coach, helping develop young talent and countryman Carlos Kameni.

Gianluigi Buffon once said he decided to be a goalkeeper after seeing N’Kono’s performances at the 1990 World Cup. In addition, he named his first son Louis Thomas in the Cameroonian’s honor.


Essam El Hadary ( 1028 Caps)

Country: Egypt

https://i1.wp.com/cheapgoals.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Essam-El-Hadary.jpg?resize=768%2C512&ssl=1

Looking for one of Africa’s most decorated goalkeepers, Essam El-Hadary is definitely on top of the pile. The Egyptian legend was part of the Egyptian generation of players that won 3 back to back Africa Cup of Nation titles from 2006 to 2010, winning four in total and another final appearance in 2017 in Gabon.

He also featured at the 2009 Confederations Cup in South Africa, his only appearance for any European club was with Sion in Switzerland but he won several titles with his club Al-Ahly of Egypt including 8 Egyptian league titles, Four Egyptian cups, four super cups, and Four CAF Champions League titles.

In 2018 when Egypt qualified for its first FIFA World Cup in a long time, Essam broke the record for the oldest goalkeeper and player to play in the FIFA World Cup after coming on for a group game in Russia 2018 at the age of 45years, beating the record set by Colombian goalkeeper Faryd Mondragón in the previous edition of the tournament. He is also the third player on Egypt’s all-time appearance record. He is still active playing for Nogoom in the Egyptian League where he has 3 appearances this season.


Joseph Antoine Belle (366 Caps)

Cameroon

https://i1.wp.com/cheapgoals.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/Joseph-Antoine-Belle.jpg?w=500&ssl=1

Another Cameroonian who is well respected for his Goalkeeping skills, Bell had a respectable club career with several foreign club sides including Bordeaux, Saint Etienne, Marseille amongst others making over 300 appearances

He played for Cameroon making 91 appearances and also played at the 1984 Summer Olympics and was on Cameroon’s winning team in the 1984 and 1988 African Cup of Nations although he was behind Nkono for a long time making the trip to the FIFA World Cup three times before making his debut in 1994 playing two group games.

Other names that are worth mentioning are Acquis Songo’o who had close to hundred caps for the Indomitable Lions and played and won the La Liga with Deportivo La Coruna before moving to Metz. Peter Rufai also had a respectable career with the Nigerian national team.



SOURCE: https://cheapgoals.com/top-5-african-goalkeeping-legends/

It's like the person that compiled this list is from Cameroon. Where is Bruce Grobelaar? He should be no 1 on that list.

Computergeek she has opened up to you a little by revealing that her husband beat her because she confronted him about a lady he is moving around with. You can use this opportunity to find out:

1. if that is the ONLY reason for the beatings.

2. if the man still does his duties as a father/husband.


If the affair is the reason for the beatings, then you can advise her not to confront her husband about it anymore for the sake of her life and children. She needs to bear it for now. Meanwhile, encourage her to start seeking ways to equip herself financially so that if the husband doesn't change and she feels she can no longer stomach his ways, she will feel confident enough to separate from him.

In all, let her remain prayerful.

Dogalmighty17:
I have dated this girl for three years. We fixed a date for the wedding for late this year. However, events seemingly out of my control necessitated that I shift the wedding to February next year. Initially, she was against the shift but I pleaded with her.

Sometime in August this year, we had a disagreement because I noticed she was being disrespectful towards me. She is hardworking, cooks well and is very business oriented. But her sense of independence makes her struggle with submission to her man. I told her how uncomfortable I was with it and she's promised to make amends. She has but from time to time, her old self comes out.

I was at a loss on what to do that I had to voice out the issue to her family. When they asked her, she told them that since I requested for a shift in wedding date, she became uncomfortable with the relationship. Her family then told her to call off the relationship. I got to know about this decision and I called her and she said she was going to obey the wishes of her family. Her mom also told me that since I keep complaining about her daughters lack of respect, I should leave her daughter alone. It took serious pleading from me before the family accepted the continuing of the relationship. They asked me that since the date I initially agreed for the wedding wasn't going to be convenient for me, when then do I think will be convenient? Since I didn't want to loose my woman, I mentioned February. The desperation on my path was much.

My mom on the other hand wants a wedding in April. She has said February is not convenient for her. All my pleas have fell on deaf ears. She has threatened not to bless the union and has even gone as far as threatening to curse me with her breasts if I wed in February.

My girl has refused to even entertain the thought of shifting the date again. She maintains that it is better that we outrightly call off the wedding, than shift it again. I understand her fears. She feels that I may just be wasting her time. I am not

This is my dilemma. Should I go with my woman who has spent three years of her life with me or do I go with my mom?

I must also mention that my mom was informed of the initial date of the wedding over a year ago. But she foot dragged in her support for months until much later in the year that I now had to take issues into my own hands.

What I noticed about the op after reading.

*desperation
*immaturity
*unassertive
*lilly livered.

Please don't take any of the above listed as insult. Just work on yourself to eradicate them before you even think of getting married. February, April, 2years time, however long it takes, work on getting those vices out first.

Beverlyjean:
Most of these so called pastors are more qualified to b called motivational speakers... U all can't b pastors... Being motivational speaker is equally good ...better that desecrating God's church...

Thank you.

midnighter:
Okay.

Yeah. And if such persons are trying to argue and insist that they are of the opposite sex, I upgrade them to scammers.

midnighter:
Lol what of those ones using pink (f) and going about spewing trash

I see them as being childish and unserious.

midnighter:
what joke...

Changing your gender.

Omojudy:
My bluntness Dey make me enemies fast. I am learning to move on from enemies rather than forcing friendships!

Of course it would. I don't think many people will like such openness especially in this part of the world. I like it though. And the one you did with a video (can't recollect the title) just shows how true you are to yourself and ways. It's quite refreshing to see.