₦airaland Forum

BeLookingIDIOT:
Let the living conditions of the white man be changed to that of blacks,and let's see how civilised they still remain. You think they are inherently law abiding gentlemen

Story
How can you change the living conditions when you don't have what it takes

Even the Asians are doing extremely well for themselves.

Ghana and South Korea had independence same day same year but you can't compare there individual progress

Likewise Nigeria and Singapore got independence a few years off each other but the development gap are miles apart


Presently developed western countries are draining our best brains example Canada

The gap is too much between us and the rest of the world

internationalman:
That mentality changes once they travel abroad.

No good innovative brain for thinking can come out when you are in some environment like ours..

Exactly
The environment doesn't support such

hisgrace090:
What you experience is their original lifestyl while the one in Nigeria is ours.

So many other African countries are like that why once a Nigeria displays their behaviour in their midst they recorgnize immediately.

Almost all other African countries are very different from Nigerians.
They are simple, very easy going. Nigerians are very brash and loud mouthed. You can trust others Africans easily in financial dealings but very different here

Although on the flip side Nigerians are very daring while other Africans are timid

If we overcome the bad side, we can rule the world.

Patrioticman007:
Its pertinent to note that you are part of the problems of Nigeria.

"The present leadership worsened it
Nigeria has never been divided like it is now.
No sense of patriotism".
Tell us more about the Biafra civil war, with its love.

Nigeria is not the only country that fought civil war, many countries in Africa and around the world fought wars

Liberia, Rwanda Sierra Leone, all had bloody Civil Wars but they are better nations today.
Vietnam fought a bloody civil war but they are moving in leaps and bounds today

Germany, Japan caused second World War that took tens of millions of lives, but today these countries are at the forefront of cutting edge technological and economical advancement. One of the best nations to live on earth today



War was never Nigerias problem
Nigerias problem is simply clueless, directionless, ineptitude, no vision government and leadership.


Like I said
The nation should keep on living like an ostrich with his head in the sand
While population is bursting to the seams and there are no tangible workable plans to drive sustainable development


We can't keep on telling ourselves lies
We must look for the dark goat today there is still daylight to see.
Transformational, Inspirational leadership is what this nation seriously needs.


If you fail to plan
You have planned to fail
Simple

Conceptsncontex:
Purest form of the truth. That giant of Africa tag has fallen off our existence since

The writer is saying the truth, but they will dismiss it like they used to.
Many people including the elites don't really understand how terribly bad things have become in this nation presently.


The present leadership worsened it
Nigeria has never been divided like it is now.
No sense of patriotism
The economy, security is nothing to write home about.

They should continue living like an ostrich with his head in the sand

Population is massively increasing
There is no real transformation , inspirational leadership


Does Nigerians really understand what's going on?

If you fail to plan you have planned to fail
.

Islie:
PUNCH

The day I made up my mind that I was done with Lagos was the day Dangotes daughter was wedding. I had a 5pm flight to catch to Enugu. Left ikoyi by 12 30pm reached airport almost 6pm. Horrible traffic
Missed my flight and was rescheduled two days later.
That day I made up my mind that I was done with Lagos.

stanluiz:
How did porn corrupt your society ? Better go and fight those useless poiticians that are underdevelopment our society and country at large.

Pornography is absolute corruption.
I totally support this.
There are so many youths held captive by this evil
Banning and blocking it is very much welcomed

Many cases where men rape minors as small as 6 months, young children is all fuelled by pornography

It's a cancweworm that must be abolished from our society

I totally support this. Has corrupted the society

Shed2013:
I understand exactly what you're saying here because I'm in the same situation but I tell you the truth I bear it without sharing the stories with third party because of the vow I do . calm down oh , love cover all this for me I bear all , exactly what you write here I'm passing through for to past 4 years in marriage, I bath our daughter of 4 years do domestic works I don't even mind the so called wife , wife don't even appreciated it not all

This is a man that has seen what marriage entails


Caveat:

Many people think marriage is all those butterflies in my stomach
Marriage is more about living with someone
Overlooking a lot of shi.t and then over time things turn around.


Many people have false impression about marriage.
And when they enter and see differently they will want exit
That's why this generation can't handle marriage

They think it's shooting a captivating pre wedding pictures and having a fabulous / lavish wedding

There is more to marriage
It involves patience
Overlooking a lot of stuffs and keep moving forward
Over time the partners get to understand each other more and enjoy there union


Marriage is work

manos:
Note: it's a bit long... I could have summarized but I want those contributing to get a crystal clear picture of the situation, so that they can give better and specific advice.

The major problem here is that she mixes up things to be done in the kitchen with things done only in the toilet.

I have been married to my wife for over a year now (no kids yet) and there are certain unhygienic habits she has been displaying, since we started living together. I have been seeking ways to help her improve on it, but a calm correction from me always leads to a bitter argument between us. (She claims I complain too much whenever I point it out)

For example, she always clears her throat early in the morning and spits in the kitchen sink. (despite the fact that we have 2 toilets with wash hand basins; one in the room and also a guest toilet, with a wash-hand basin which is basically 3 steps from the kitchen). Then she goes to the bathroom, gets her toothbrush and comes back to the kitchen to brush her teeth, while doing several things with toothpaste and saliva drooling from her mouth all through.

The other day, she prepared breakfast (spaghetti) for both of us with the drooling toothpaste mouth and i refused to eat from it. I didn't complain to her either, until she asked why I didn't take my portion of the spaghetti from the pot, later that evening. I mentioned to her that, as always I find it disgusting to eat spaghetti, seasoned with toothpaste drool and saliva. The response I got from her was a hiss and then she said that, next time I should inform her if I am not going to eat the food she cooked so that she would not cook for me."

I let that slide but I felt she missed the point. The next day was her birthday and I decided to prepare breakfast for her.
While I was in the kitchen cooking, she came in with the same drooling toothpaste mouth to take a kitchen Scissors in order to cut something on her pants, even though we have another scissors in the room for such purposes. In the process of trying to pick the scissors, her hands which were covered with toothpaste drool had to cross the pot which I was cooking with. I mentioned to her that I was not comfortable with that and she just hissed as usual, still picked the Scissors and left the kitchen while angrily saying that I am just a complainer. I lost it at this point and proceeded to give her a lecture in anger about basic hygiene and why I can not keep quiet over these things because we live in a shared space and how her actions have a direct effect on me. It ended in a shouting match till she kept quiet, without accepting she was wrong.

This is the pattern almost everything takes when I try to correct her. The worst part is that I would still have to be the one to apologize for shouting at her because if I don't, I might be subjected to a week long silent treatment which I dread.

There are other more unhygienic things that are done by her, which I might not be able to post here due to the fact that I am not completely anonymous and she is still my wife but I hope this information is enough for someone to understand my frustration and profer a solution.

Oga you should just find a way to live with her.
Personally I don't even see this as a problem.
If not you will always be irritated
Just overlook it

There is no human being without there own flaws. None

Professorcplus:
Yes! Things happens that makes jaw open but regardless not to xtans or "believers" . It happen even within circular people. You don't necessary need to agree with every clergy man but when it come to Sam, he knows when to balance been hardcore superstition clergy and been principled.

You don't like him because his message doesn't go inline with what other old generation pastors talks. There are different Churches for different folks. If you're the type that thinks God can do anything by deliberately jumping from high tower and won't fall or you think you can just plainly buy anoited handkerchief from MoG to cure cancer or std or you are the type that is willing to pray your way like a mad man into success without willing to take deliberate steps then his church and messages is not for you.

He hasn't done wrong by closing his worship center and also provide facemask for his members. He's been Practical. But not withstanding, it is your type of church you see someone die of the virus and their next prayer would be "Let's thank God weren't those that died of covid." See if you self died on Saturday, people in your church would still thank God on Sunday.

Don't be a victim. Stay safe! Watch and pray. Say no to blind faith.

1 Corinthians 2
King James Version
2 And I, brethren, when I came to you, came not with excellency of speech or of wisdom, declaring unto you the testimony of God.

2 For I determined not to know any thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified.

3 And I was with you in weakness, and in fear, and in much trembling.

4 And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:

5 That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

Most of today's preaching is based on enticing words of man's wisdom which is powerless can't change anything.

And that's the preaching being done today in many churches.

It doesn't change or transform men
It has no direct impact on the society
The country doesn't feel the impact of the gospel
In fact the country seems worse off
Because something is definitely wrong with today's preaching:

The answer is that powerless gospel are being preached on most of our pulpits

The hearers go into government, public and private sectors and leave the institutions worse off
Because they didn't interact with the real truth. They had no light, because darkness cannot overcome light. Never ever.

Joseph, Daniel, Esther, Ezra in the Bible where examples of men that affected there environment by there potent belief in the God they serve.

Palema007:
I do not support women hoarding sex, I don't think I have typed anything of such here, however other than the fact that some women do it intentionally,some don't. Some women lose their libidos, enthusiasm, confidence and interest in sex especially after child birth, some experience post natal shock/changes in their bodies. Now my problem is, some Men do not understand this they labeled it as hoarding and its very pitiable to read that some women believe this too. As you can see on this thread, a sarcastic comment from a supposed wife or mother. I wonder why Most Nigerians are very judgemental though. And why Nigerian Men hardly take interest in understanding their women's anatomies. Has the said husband ever tried to understand his wife and her reasons or try to help her be in the mood? Do this Men understand that, Men are always ready why Women need to be ready? Do they understand that Men have sex to ease stress, while Women have to ease stress to have Sex? Do this Men understand this difference? No. And their next available option? Get a girlfriend! Why get married in the first place if all you need is a intimacy gadget and not a wife?


And as far the post you quote, that is the reality. It is left to you to find person who is willing to share. It's not that difficult

It's not even about finding the person willing. It's more about people are not taking marriage serious again.


And this kind of attitude is one of the major causes of being unserious with marriage.
That's why some men are even going baby mama way now.
Because they don't see the need for marriage.

And in the end
Children born into such unions
Bear the brunt
Raising bandits, criminals, prostitutes all around the place

I am sorry for this society in the next 10 to 20 years
The result will be there for all to see

lordprogress:
Lol we told you it will end in tears take your lose in peace bro.

In this game
You win some
You loose some
Last time we played you guys Europa finals
We beat una
So enjoy
Do me I do you
God no go vex


On the other hand
I am still questioning
The competency of Lampard

lordprogress:
Lol we told you it will end in tears take your lose in peace bro.

In this game
You win some
You loose some
Last time we played you guys Europa finals
We beat una
So enjoy
Do me I do you
God no go vex

Palema007:
Thank you for this! The other time I was discussing with a group of friends offline and told them this, the got defensive but it's the reality people face in marriages. I told them The husbands money is his money and not his wife's (interchangeablly) and the wife's body is her body not their bodies. If a husband stops his wife from using any of his properties,she can't do much to fight it, if a woman or man decides not to satisfy his or her partner sexually, you can't sue her or him for it. Contrary to narratives propagated as norms, they are just sweet talk people delude themselves with. The best anyone can do for him or herself is to get a partner who is willing and ready to share.

Reality is, it's no one's right but how much one is permitted to have.

A woman hoarding sex can lead to several outcomes
The man keeping mistresses
marrying extra wife
Or even dissolution of the marriage.

So who losses in the end?
Why did she get married in the first place if she had such intents?

That's why we are having many broken homes today
And most of the times
Children born in those kind of homes bear the brunt

I have seen such cases
The man moves on remarries
The woman faces her own thing
The children born into such homes
Then turns into cretins

In fact there is a case reported to me by a Friend last Sunday
The man remarried and moved on
There first daughter still in ss3 around 16
Was impregnated by a 19 year old school mate
And she has been married off to the 19 year old Muslim northern boy

That poor girl won't know what she did to herself till she is in her 30s

reservd:
The serious guys are scared because of their financial status mostly caused by unemployment. By the time they find something reasonable doing in their 30s, they go for early to mid twenties ladies leaving their age mates or those close to their ages. The wise young ladies grabs this opportunity and marry while some others will say they are still young, wanna complete school, wanna make their own money or build their career etc. By 30 these ladies haven't achieved what they set for themselves but will now want to marry but how many guys wanna marry 30+ lady? This same set of ladies will cry men are scarce after using their hands to throw opportunity away. This is just a factor though, others are wayward lifestyle, brideprice, attitude, education etc

You hit the point
Once a woman doesn't get married at 25 to 27 years
From 28 is even late
When even men in there 40s who married late are marrying girls early to mid 20s.


It's a cycle we are seeing now

damiloladuke:
A video of a Nigerian man with 32 children has surfaced on the internet.

The man who appears to be from the Northern part of the country has 4 wives.

In the video where he was being interviewed, the man revealed that he has 16 male and 16 female children, some of which already have their own kids too.

He even stated that he has little babies that are still sucking their moms.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WngSxiub3LY

People don't like minding there business
As long as he is capable of taking care of them
No problem
All this people shouting overpopulation
Are we up to India or China?

Africaa population is still 1billion people

Anyone that wants to have plenty children it's allowed
It's within there boundaries

We southerners need to breed plenty children too
I support that
I like home filled with children

Dedetwo:
Please educate us on the places that depend on Lagos port. The silly or assumed dependent on Lagos port is purely idiotic and politics. The moment the shithole ceases to exist, the Lagos will have to compete with others ports in other nation states such as Warri port, Calabar port, Onne port, Bonny port and even Port Harcourt port without any silly federal government of Nigeria's directives.

Or ask him neighboring Cotonou with seaport that landlocked countries like Niger and even core northern Nigerian states like sokoto, Kano etc depends on. How developed and rich is Cotonou with its seaport and small population?

Lagos is prospering simply because of its affinity to Nigeria.
Nigeria has been her gain.
Simple

Rolexjerry:
All these Lagosians overhyping Lagos State I tire for una oooo.
Just this morning, someone made a comment on how Lagos State alone could sponsor the whole Nigeria's budget in one of the posts here.
The other day another Lagosian said that Lagos was the state with the largest economy in the entire African continent, I was shocker than Buhari sef because Lagos was not even in the top 5- Lagos is far below Johannesburg, Cape Town, Cairo etc in terms of GDP alone.

Come back to Nigeria, Lagos made an IGR of ₦398 billion in the whole of last year 2019. That amount of money is not even enough to fund Lagos' 2019 budget which was set at over half a trillion Naira.
For your information, Akwa Ibom State alone contributed roughly that amount (₦380 billion) PER MONTH(not per year oooo) to the Nigerian economy in 2019 in the sales of over one hundred and eighty million barrels of crude oil at an average of price of 65 dollars per barrel.

If every state were to survive on their resources, you would notice how Lagos would be struggling to keep up with even the smallest Niger-Delta state.

The most important state to Nigeria's economy is Akwa Ibom State, followed by Delta, Rivers and Bayelsa States.
These four states alone produce over 93% of Nigeria's oil literally catering for the economy needs of the entire country but when we want to talk about financial muscle, only Lagos State comes to the fore.

AKWA IBOM STATE MAKES LAGOS' YEARLY REVENUE IN A MONTH.

Lagos is overhyped, Akwa Ibom is underrated.

Very truly stated
When you truly look at the numbers you find out that Niger Delta are the ones carrying this nation

Heathrow44:
Tbh the next generation of men are going to be more feminist than the feminists themselves, with age and I mean 2026, a new generation of men would spring up that would change the entire narrative of what masculinity means, men are going to be relegated to the background, transgender men are going to take the fore front and everything that makes a man a man is going to be changed, that's the reality of it all and is going to happen, change is constant, u can't fight it, Europe is at d fore front of making men and women equal cos they are letting more and more women inclusive in law making process, more men in authority are giving up their rights to women just cos they like them, its going to happen as society laws are going to be breached and law and order maintained by women and their transgender fellows with force, expect the changes! Its going to happen cos more and more men are becoming stupid, useless and more women inclined!

The last frontier that will remain unconquerable will be Africa.
The frointier concerning relationship between men and women are changing rapidly. It's so glaring to see.

In this continent men are still in charge of many things. Economically the gap is still there.

My own take is that women should take there rightful place nature placed them in scheme of things. But not challenging men's place in the scheme of things.

On the other hand. Men should with wisdom manage things.
Many women have been radicalized because of what they saw past generations of women go through in the hands of men.

So wisely knowing how to manage this relationship will go along way in keeping things right between the two genders.

Still men and women that have rightly managed this relationship have enjoyed good and peaceful union. It's the ones that have poorly or never managed the relationship well that are filled with bitterness and failed in enjoying the perfect bliss between a right relationship between a man and a woman.
There are still things to enjoy from the relationship cause we need each other.

O

veroupdate:
That's generational curse

Which one is generational curse
Her parents had good marriage
Even after her mother's death
Her father never remarried


Maybe she was unfortunate to not meet the right man for her
Being a very big mans daughter

favorfavor:
you see this life l don't understand certain things sometimes ! but l will never regret living right - what is good about having sex !! anybody can get scholarship-yeye generation

Exactly anybody can get scholarship
Many are getting scholarships
Don't ever regret living right
It has its own reward
Irrespective of whatever the narrative
The world chooses

Mhizhelen001:
Really... Are they now encouraging us to go into immorality, this lady without shame got elevated? I swear this life no balance. Did they not see decent girls to help ni

That's there plan
But the morally sound ones
Are still doing well
And well rewarded
Way better than this

TOPCRUISE:
This is not fair. Morality is dead. Immorality is celebrated.
Lesson: if you are a girl and want to be a celebrity live a life of immorality like this girl that won a scholarship by doggying a dick and swallowing raw cum

Actually to each there own
There still good moral girls doing well and getting scholarships abroad

I have a relation
Excellently moral
Went to medical school on scholarship
Presently in England doing her post graduate
Breaking boundaries

One thing I know is that God can't be mocked
Which ever way one wants
They should live there life
The end will justify the means
But the moral ones still get rewarded

NockMedia:
Walkaway from any and every potential confrontation with a lady.

Exactly
Why will a man engage in confrontation with a lady. Talkless a toxic one.
It's like rubbing mud on yourself.

Toxic women are a no no.
If you want to live long and peaceful
Try and avoid them.

There are still wonderful, cool calm ladies that cannot hurt a fly
That has not been corrupted by this age

But the young men are kids sha
They aren't matured at all.

Olamila:
Let me not bore you guys with my relationship history but this girl is my first love, i met her while i was in school 300l. Ever since then i have always been there for her despite even having a low budget as student because I'm not from a wealthy home, even her parents has times10 more than my family. But despite that i try all i could to maintain my role in the relationship because i don't fancy myself asking anything from my girlfriend.

Before anything else i need to tell little about my girlfriend, she is beautiful and nice. Almost every guy wants to woo her and all of that. Aside of that my girlfriend is very stingy to me, she can never allow her anything be in my possession, she doesn't have this idea that we could end up one day though she will always say something close to it only during fun time. But when she is at her leisures she will say how she fancy how husband to be and all of that which i no I'm not the person she could had been referring to. That not even my major issue.

She always been cruel when she asks me for anything and i refuse to give her maybe i don't have or just don't see needs to do so.
I also discovered that most of our fun times comes immediately money enters my hand. Because i remember when i was in school my first 800k i made was finished and squandered with her, i haven't dated anyother or even have another girl since i met her. Because i try to make her feel comfortable because i no how many guys wish her to be with her. So secondly i made another 1m i squandered it with her too. But when this money just finish guyz i always see hell in her. This was the ups an downs i was experiencing till i finished my school with her. It was a shame for me upon the money i made in school i graduated with zero account looking for money for my law school. I wasn't fortunate to get any help so i sat back to Hustle. Then i was begging looking for helper to assist me when i saw one big opportunity that i need to take but it the opportunity required money as my account was bleeding zero. I begged everyone including my girlfriend but she told me she doesn't have even if she happened to get money for me i will pay her interest. This words alone made me cry, did you no instead of helping me out she told me I'm not the only one that needs help she also need to invest on her self which she was right i believe her. She later invested her money in one fraudulent sheme which she lost the money.

FastTrack to what is happening now, i later got help from someone who offered me 50k and my mum 20k making it 70k i picked myself up and started my Hustle again. Within three months i made 800k again. All this times i was giving her update about my business and earnings. Could you imagine she had the gut to ask for money despite her behaviors. Because of my nature i don't believe someone's bad nature should change my own nature so i still sent her some money because i also no she is broke.

Since then i just forgot about what she did and all of those stuffs because my money kept coming and i don't keep grudges i keep taking care of her. Now i had issue with my business i want to fix something up i was also telling her. this girl went ahead to start asking me to send her money. I was really disappointed i protested because i noticed when i have money i become very careless. It seems money covers so many things.
I just need advice because i think it is time to let her go coz with her nature and type of girl it might end in tears for me. All she do is stay on social media, snap and post and look for who will send her money. No skills, i have begged her several times to look for something to be doing she refused and tells me how her dad won't allow her. She doesn't listen to me, always feel like boss when little money enter her hand. Guys i really love her but i think it is time to seek help because i will regret if this continues.

As long as you remain with her, you will never go up financially.
She is a waster
Sent to ruin you
She will never add value to your life

Another advice
Keep away from women now
Try and get direction for your life
And develop financial management

kapelvej:
It depends on the women. Some women may abuse it

Exactly
That's why a man must look very well before he marries.
Also seeking God's face is very very important.

mk3jax:
Boys don't appreciate their father under they become a father themselves. The man is expected to takes care of his wife, kids, in law, siblings, parent, cousins, nieces etc depending on his financial ability. You think the money to provide all those comfort will come from siting at home and forming bonding with child. Bonding with kids only works when the job allows.
If you want to know the relevance of fathers, look at homes without one and see how miserable the life of the woman and kids are most of the times. Many of the fatherless girls get pregnant very young while the boys drop from school to go and learn a trade because there is no dad to provide.
Also look at girls that dump new born babies because there is no man to provide for her and the baby. You do not know the value of a man until he either walks away or dies. My mum still misses my dad's contribution to running the home they built together even though he died 14 years ago and all her kids are grown up.

Exactly
One of my associates was confessing to me that it was when he married and had children, with the stress that comes with providing for them.
He so much appreciated his dad. Although he was already late.
Someone that was privileged to have his own car and and other largese as a university student all from his father's support.
He now appreciated what it took his dad to make him extra comfortable as a young man. When he considers what it takes him to provide for his family now.

merieam16:
Some fathers er still much relevant, depending which father u want 2 become

Exactly
He is talking from his own experience
My dad is extremely relevant in the lives of I and my siblings
I talk with him 2 times every week
I talked with him this morning self

That some had bad parenting doesn't mean that's how it is.
Some of us had the best dads you could ever think of
And still enjoying them

ruggedtimi:
Reading articles on biographies of Top oil and gas C.E.O's motivates me alot to do more. My dream is to sit on the board of a major petroleum company

I believe oil has done it's final cause.
Anybody still looking at oil is wasting his time.

I read one recent report last week
All the rich gulf oil states are having terrible economic strain as of recent. From Saudi Arabia to Kuwait to UAE.
Serious budget deficit
Deep economic woes facing them.

Saudi Arabia has moved there vision 2030 about diverting from oil dependency to 2020.
There reserve of $440 billion will go bust in one year's time if oil price remain at its current price because they spend $45 billion monthly to support there budget


Technologies is the future
Oil is already gone

jericco1:
People are scared because you guys might mortgage Nigeria and Nigerians

And the ones that ruled before how has Nigeria been?
I do not give a crap about Nigerias presidency. Because the entire nation is a complete basket case.
No tangible advancement or growth since 1960 of independence
Complete stagnancy


Our elders recently talked about setting up a development fund for our region.
They are presently at committe level
My prayer is that they come out with a world class blueprint and pathway to follow for complete development of our region

I personally and millions of our people both home and in diaspora will willingly contribute to the fund.


As for Nigeria
It's a complete basket case