₦airaland Forum

Baawaa:
I will not love what will kill me,what will kill me I will not love

What will Kill me will not find me.

Magnoliaa:
Okay ooo. Na me be the fargin, and this guy was a recovering bad boy. He coped with me for five months, max, as we were already making plans for getting married in the next three months.

One night like that sha, he got tipsy and begged me. I gree. He no fit even wait make we tumble go bedroom. Oga say no, mba, we must do it right there, right now on the white couch. I say okay. I pushed the mental discomfort of the fact that it wasn't the perfect night as I envisioned with Indian love song playing in the background and turari burning on the nightstand with amadioha's-like red, fat candles on the floor.

Sha sha, one thing led to something to another thing and it was time for pene***tion. And... and... omooo, at the verrryy first touch of his thing to my tip, I give him one strong leg kick and jumped out of the window o. Ah! E be like say dem wan use giant saw cut me into two. Ah. Emi omolomo; omo iya e kan soso. Is me one boy want to come and scarra and pulverize and destabilize. I couldn't take it!!!

Blood was gushing out from my elbows and arms like this ni o, from my batman stunt. And this boy started screaming the whole house down, cursing me and everything and telling me he's locking me outside, ehn igbadakodo, yada yada yada. And all the neighbours were looking - some outside, some from their burglary-proof windows. Chai. That was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life, let me tell you. I now started the walk of ****** out of the compound...

See, I'm teary already. I'm coming back. Lemme blow my nose and comport myself... you've taken me down a memory highway... Oh, God.

Wait.

This is Hillarious Fabulous Clinton

ashawopikin:
the only way to handle a feminist is to dick her to submission

The Fury Energies will just turn to tears �

New Monikers New New Issues. Una no dey tire.

Call her and have your first experience to Wisdom !

flexxyworld:
For God so love the world , that he GAVE his only begotten son. So if she really loves or care for you the main pointer will be giving. She gives you willing or ready to give up anything just for you to be happy.

Giving doesn't actually means you are loved it can suggest you have her "interest" at Hand and some women pays to get it.

Same Way an Olosho or runz girls will have many sugar daddies and keep side boyfriend they will be spending just for the "marriage" and after she bears your surname, Runz continue in full galore.

Don't mistake a girl giving and spoiling you for love, Love is much deeper !

Some women can give you Heaven on Earth just to take your masculinity not that they really care.

Life is much more about Interest !

Saintmary:
When a woman gets married, the husband expects her to abandon her family and friends and focus on him and his family.

While this benefits the husband because he gets to isolate the woman so he can do as he pleases. In the long run, the woman, who has no support or defense ends up turning her kids into her friends and only means of support.


Once the children grow up and begin to start their families, the woman grasps at every means possible to keep the only friends she knows, her kids!!!!!!!


So, if the woman is a nasty person, or she has had horrible experiences for which nobody seeks therapy, well, she will take it out on anyone in close contact with her. And who is the easiest target? You guessed it: Daughter in law.

You are Reasonable. Keep Up the vibe. God helps.

Daniluv1:
Let female corpers be posted to female school s and male corpers to male schools case closed.

This is so Good but You can also see the evil machinations of lesbianism and Gay. Human mind is so Profound that only Almighty God can Set it to Optimal Operational level.

sheedy407:
We keep creating fear through social media.

I was in this flight and what happened was that the Pilot off the Air Condition for few seconds and put it on again.

The plan haven't even take-off as claimed here

Social Media is the number 1 source of Depression and Oppression for the masses.

Starlight25:
1. I always dread the diminishing of the connection between us.
I pray i don't fall out of love or be a victim of such....

2. The death of my father eight years resulted to a huge emotional and physical suffering in my family ever since...
I pray i don't depart and leave my spouse alone neither will i be left alone. Amen.

Amen !!

Joysticks:
If your lady no dey squirt for you she is not into you.Dont be deceived by her moaning by calling you'baby harder'Make she squirt.

Cheating is beyond Squirting anyway. It's matter of the mindset among other causes. Almighty God shall help us and Gift us our Heart desire as Patner much more than we try to help ourselves, Amen.

Joysticks:
If your lady no dey squirt for you she is not into you.Dont be deceived by her moaning by calling you'baby harder'Make she squirt.

Cheating is beyond Squirting anyway. It's matter of the mind. Almighty God shall help us as much as we try to help ourselves.

.

He was just trying to lift her up maybe she now strong body or He couldn't due to her Height and Weight . I didn't see any groping.

Tokskob2008:
Saw this on FB and nostalgia kicked in........

What movie or movies comes to your mind when you see this old video cassette player?

For me it's Jackie Chan's POLICE STORY PT 1,2 and 3.

Share yours.

Koto Orun,
Ogboju Ode ninu Igbo Irunmale,
Tufan,
Mother India
Mad Alaja,
Teri Maharbaniya,
Hardway the only Way,
Equalizer 2000,
Commando,
Damenda,
MeGambo,
VAnDamme,
Rambo,
fadeyi oloro,
Ogunjimi,
Abija,
Yemi My Lover,
Oleku,
Lalude
Felele etc

Awesomeking:
its the hypocrites that believe that smoking is allowed.. Anything that intoxicates you and takes away your senses is haram

Baraka Allahu Fihi

.

JayB11:
People of God, i suffered in this life sha. This lady i am talking about is a lady i met since 2007, at that time i was in Senior Secondary. It happened that i visited her at school for proper grammatical grilling, she came out and spent only 6 seconds to say "i don't know you, please leave".

Thereafter, i deployed my CIA, FBI, DSS skills to garner info about her. It was quite successful, i got to know her address and even got her number through her brother (i lied to him that we were classmates), more so, i realised that our parents are very good friends too. Though, this lady crammed my number to always reject my calls.

Later on, i was able to trace her house, and that was were my zombie mood got activated. Brethren, can u imagine that i would trek for about 2 hours in the name of exercise, just to survey this lady's house to see if we can meet since she doesn't pick my calls nor reply my text, it was all futile. Infact, it has become more of a routine for me to go around her house on weekly basis, during which i got stunk by bees on several occasions, coupled with the Temple run i had with some mischievous dogs from her neighbours' houses (na im pain me pass).

Time past, and sometimes around 2010 (now awaiting admission into Uni), we met at Church and i never had the courage to meet her cos public embarrassment and I are not from same village. She sensed my body language but i had no send thought. Again, i met her on FB, and to crown it all, this girl accepted me and liked my pix, but she never responded to any of my messages not until one day we met at an event where she responded to my "hi". I felt the time has come.....little did i know.

From 2011 to 2013, below are few of the humiliations i suffered from her hands even when we fully got into talking terms
...

1. Bought expensive gifts which she rejected without reasons.
2. Failed to show up at eateries and other venues that we agreed to meet at numerous times, most of which i spent money to make a cool arrangement.
3. When with me, she calls several guys (richer ones) and put the phone on hands free for reasons best known to her.
4. Told my friends we are not a match, infact i don't fit into her spec.
5. She never gave me that space for love. YET I WAS WORSHIPPING AND STILL FOLLOWING HER LIKE I WAS CURSED.

Fast forward to date, the girl na Med Doctor, and the guy don receive small grace, now gurl wan carry my Children..... O YA WERE.
PS:

This same girl is now doing anything possible to let us get married. She got some people to talk to me abppout us coming back together for a very serious relationship that would lead to marriage. I thought you should marry your friend, not a hypergamist

E no easy o. Any red flag,I'm out by 50%. I don't even like pushing. Once I flow, I will need atleast 35% response to Ascertain whether we are on same rhythm!

.

Toks2008:
If you are asked to do away with one of these meals, which one will it be?

A. EBA
B. RICE
C. NOODLES..

I can't joke with Eba and I love my rice with ofada sauce.

For me, noodles is out forever... What about you?

Noodle is meant for small Shildren

Rice is meant for Boys

Eba is meant for Men that has work to do if you know, you know !

Inshaa Allah!

Clint02:
I believe some guys on NL will call him a simp.

In an Events not like she is injured ? Hmm God knows the best !

Loreettaa:
Be honest, how often do you wash your bra(for the ladies) or boxers (for the men) in a week?
Let's know the dirty ones!

Daily Now. A boxer for 24hours. The feelings so Good.

sisisioge:


There is truly someone for everyone. I see a lot of silly questions being asked by married men on this forum and I wonder. Indeed it is very hard for smart women to find a spouse....hian. May God help us.

You wanna trust every thread on Nairaland Becareful not to let them get to You

Focusmind:
He looks a little bit over weight. Heart attack, HBP and other cardio-related sicknesses are un forgiven and merciless when they strike, especially in a country without emergency like Nigeria.

It could even be the case of Low Blood Pressure but Almighty God knows Best.

jesusjnr2020:
The devil has no tool but that which man gives to him. If man gave him no tools, he would be a miserably powerless useless loser and wouldn't be able to do more than a dead rat.

All the power he has to use against man, man foolishly gave to him.

So man is solely to blame for any tool Satan has and is able use against him.

Hence the onus actually lies on man, not the devil regardless of what he does, because the devil cannot do anything or use any tool against man without man's help.

God bless.

Deep. May Almighty God Protect Us All.

Thank God

Eriokanmi:
I differ. The level of immorality nowadays can't be compared with that of the olden days. How many Virgins can you see today in their 20s? To even toast a girl back then was a great effort because you wouldn't even see gals around. You have to sneak or tip-toe just to catch a glimpse at them in their homes. Nowadays, civilisation has made things worse but there's nothing we can do about it. You don't even need to toast a girl nowadays. Just by exchanging numbers, you're good to go.

You don't toast girls sir. Girls will now toast You.

Hope you are watching tiktok and campus street interviews with girls. I hope the Consequences doesn't get More Dire as we have Transgress and Trespass beyond super normal. Almighty God have mercy.

folake4u:
I thought doggy style was invented by "indomie generation oh". I'm shocked at these pictures mehn.

I think Doggy style was the natural sex style. Maybe to distinguish human and animal sex style the "Missionary" brought in "Missionary Style" the papa and mama way. Most animals climb from behind and I think earliest human ain't different.

I also think whatever animals do
is the natural way of "Nature" while Human invented others to mark our Evolutionary Journey from Animalistic World into Homo Civilisations.

To the Op, Anyway, nothing is new On Earth it is just more colorful nowadays and widespread due to WWW/Internet. Human-Race is now linked.

Human have always evolve and devolve through time. Future Generations in 200years time will laugh at Present Generations with what is Happening in most nightclubs across the world. We ain't sculpting our own, there are videos and pictures evidence all littered across the internet even those of celebrities.

luminouz:
I get your point but spiritual leaders and her parents NEVER need to know our bed troubles. It's a slap to my mudafuckin face that I need to tell my pastor(who shouldn't know every detail of my life) and her parents( who already gave me the reins to take charge of their daughter) that my wife is not fuqin me. That's some weird ass shiit.

Second point is once the woman knows you are a staunch Christian who won't ever divorce or take drastic measures, why should she change? That's how many men just 'accept her like that' and try to condone her excesses and trust me, she will do more to that man. Once, she knows you cant curtail her excesses, why should she respect you? I have seen men like this in marriage. They lament everyday because they are pastors and they must not divorce or take hard steps to correct their wives wrongs. So they die slowly inside a loveless marriage.

So should he die inside a loveless marriage because she refused to change?

I expected You to Say it's a slap on your face that Your Wife denied you sex ?

Luminouz, a whole You Where the Vibes and Mojo. Redpill can't work on all Homes and Macho is not required in every situation especially marriage where Children's life are involved. It's not just about You and the Woman but Kids whose Brain might get fvcked up because of una imbroglio.

.

Plantiff:
Alzheimer's disease, dementia or Parkinson's disease affects 3 million Americans annually despite their healthcare delivery system. I don't know the statistics in Nigeria because it isn't recorded.

Bill Gates is committed to finding the best possible solution for these diseases that attack when grandparents retire from labour and intend to spend quality time with their children and grandchildren. I think this disease killed Gates, the senior, and the father of the richest man in the world wouldn't die if money could treat dementia.

These category of diseases is better prevented than cured.

Dementia is a disease that is usually managed. In developed countries there are dementia care homes.

Those facilities are lacking in Nigeria which makes men that suffer from Dementia to be at the mercy of their wives.

Why am I saying all these?

I'm advising bachelors eligible for marriage to avoid evening newspapers at all cost.

Marry a woman that is at least 10 years younger than you so that if this disease sets in both of you would not suffer it together because women are more likely to suffer dementia than men.

Also, since there are no care homes in Nigeria, your survival depends on the willingness of your wife to take care of you since your children will be taking care of their own families.

Jacob's survival today is because he married a "very good" woman he is 19 years older than who is taking care of him .

Hmmm, Nice Write Up!

NoApology:
So one of my uncles that is based overseas is billed to come home this Xmas, as such a lot of cleaning and fumigation has been going on in his house in readiness for his come back.

I went this morning to supervise the work going on there. I went inside of the stores by the car house and saw this old metal cabinet and I decided to check what's inside. Lo and behold, I found in the midst of old paper files and debris my uncle's Nigerian certificates! Omo!

Rats has eaten some portions of the certificates. I scanned through and discovered that he was,by his Nigerian qualifications, below average. This is the same man that is an internationally sort after lawyer both in the country and overseas where he resides.

This got me wondering with so many questions on my mind:
1. Are certificates really overrated?

2. Does it really come a time in our lives (apart from death) when our certificates becomes irrelevant?

3. Is it not obsolete to measure ones intelligence based on exam performances? ( My uncle would have been jobless or better still a charge and bail lawyer at best going by his academic performance)

4. And why do Nigerians perform better in almost everything when the leave this country? Are we too stringent or is a reflection of our flawed system?

What You saw are the Skills set I Your Uncle's Brain that made his Life and World. Those are the Skillsets that Powered his Brain and Took Him away from Ignorance and Possibly Animalistic World.

Forget about the Paper Certificate, How was his Life after those Certificates ?

That's Right !