₦airaland Forum

Rubyjade:
Indian companies are even the worst

So I heard.

The OP is just being defensive. Even though you're trying to be religious about it, just as stated above you didn't engage in a heart to heart conversation to enable the student know the consequences of their actions if they continue.
They say when you beat a child, you use your other hand to extend love to the child.
I recently learned that when I'm beating my cousin in the name of discipline, I may just be beating her out of anger and not discipline. I'd rather talk to her as she always remember what anyone tells her as consequences of bad behavior.
The student may still commit the same offense with the thought that the consequence is the beating only.
You can do better.

alcuin:
And they didn't add banks?

Do have any experience, share it as I know that they have a strong culture that puts it in check to an extent.

It's about the organization and their culture. Where I work, toxicity isn't allowed. I've heard of a senior staff (mgt grade) that was forced to resign as her junior colleague reported her for her shitty attitude as she was said to always talk down on people. She was supposed to be dismissed but they rather advised her to resign.
I've worked in a Lebanese company where the MD would call Team members derogatory names during meetings and give them the insult of their lives and it's a group of companies.
The thing is people need the job to pay bills and will rather bear than leaving.
We don't have strong institutions here to enforce the laws that prevent workplace toxicity from happening or keeps it at the barest minimum.

Beltz:
Then the so called pastor does not know the scripture and also does not know in whom he believes.

Okay

UyaiIncomparabl:
It is very true, my sister. Truth be told, we have one of the most primitive and unnecessary traditions ever heard of. Just deciding not to hold your marriage in your ancestral home can make them invoke spirits. Even burial rites too aren't to be joked with just like marriage rites.

A particular family was wiped out, I mean an entire generation was eliminated because they refused to bury their grandfather in a way that suited the village people. I can't imagine.

It's best we give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar. My former pastor preaches that in one of The Apostolic Church dominated by AkwaCross assembly.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Not in Akwa-Ibom. All it takes for those jobless uncles and grandfathers is to use "Schnapps" to invoke spirits and your life will never remain the same.

I still struggle to believe it happens but my parents always sight instances.
I didn't want my trad in the village but the thought of wicked people and invoking.....I respected my parents wish.
I know of a relation with back to back death of their children till the man was advised by my mum to pay her dowry and they'll raise children in good health.
They heeded to her advise and they recorded no death of their offspring till date.

kokaiye:
Time 4 my BS!!!!!! YES!!!

As my prince charming dey sleep, mk i use dt time write my BS (its like my baby go like sleep gan ooo, mk i no complain cs e good , i c y guy man no dey move much 4 belle )

To my story.

So i ve being having contraction since 34weeks but d contractn only happen in d midnight, me no dey worry cs e too early... But at d same time guy man no dey move much except i rob my belly n e will move to where i touch, dtz one of d signs i knw dt all is well by 35weeks 5days i was worried about his movement so i went to d hospital..


End of BS.

Congrats Ma.....may God strengthen you to nurture your LO and he's blessed.
Congrats lengendsmother and others that just birthed their LOs

Ephetar:
MIL is around... most times wifey and baby are in her room but once I wake up that's the end of sleeping that night...I don't really blame your hubby o...the headache I feel during the day now is crazy...

I think you should sleep in the settee in the parlour. You would be far from the cries to an extent but you must ensure that that you check up on them when you wake up to use the restroom or find it difficult to fall asleep after waking up and lending a helping hand where necessary.
My son still wakes up at night to feed but it used to be like 3 times before daybreak till 7 weeks but it has reduced to once or twice. Just be patient.

Just as advised above, you can also try and send them to your MIL or your mum whoever is nearer.
I left Benin to be with my mum in Lagos on the 12th day after delivery so that I wouldn't be alone as my husband was already falling sick due to the stress.

thatthickgurl:
There were no signs. He doted over me. Calling every day, most times, we speak for 5 hours at a stretch. He knew my every movement. Always concerned. He will pray for me.

I didn't see this coming, never thought he was that kind of person

It happens but you have to get over it.
It's ideal to grieve but your recovery is in your hands. If you harm yourself, baba will definitely move on and be living his best life without you and nobody will lynch him for your how you chose to deal with the pain.

thatthickgurl:
How my morning is going so far

I've cried a few times.
I'm holding back tears every minute
Currently in a bus and this tears want to come out.

God please, this is going to be embarrassing

Please for the love of those who you matter to, try and be strong OP.
I see that you made sacrifices and now you're regretting. It may been obvious that you were in a relationship with yourself but you may have been too blinded to see.
Can you try to heal and work on your self esteem or else it'll be a reoccurring decimal in your life and you may end up with someone that'll hurt you because you think he's doing you a favor by being in your life.
You need to start seeing yourself as the prize my dear. Work on yourself, improve your income earning capacity, take very good care of yourself, na dem go rush you o.

thatthickgurl:
He knew I had low self-esteem and he capitalized on that. Now my self esteem has hit rock bottom

I'm sorry about your experience OP, I knew this was the reason you are suicidal as you claim.
You don't need a man to validate you please. If you continue like this, you'll find it difficult to even take a break in relationships and even when it is toxic.
The first thing is identifying the reason for the low self esteem. Even if it may be your weight, if you're curvy I see no reason you shouldn't love yourself but if you aren't, there other features you possess you can amplify and love yourself the more.
I grew up having low self esteem from my teenage to early 20s. I have a poor dentition and puberty dealt with me. All my face was covered with pimples and my schoolmates called me Pimples Garden to the extent that someone from my alma mater saw me about 10 years after at Eko hotel Busstop and called me the name and asked where the pimples all went.
My dentition is bad that my mum usually asked me not to smile in public. I've been to different dentists but I decided I wasn't going to correct it and people still ask me questions when they see it.
I outgrew the pimples....as regards my teeth, I learned to accept myself and look for other qualities and features I posses and amplify them and improve my esteem.
My hubby raised exceptions when we were courting about the teeth and I told him my efforts and stance and he still loved me for me.
A man will love you for you. Don't allow a man love you out of pity as it never ends well.

ednut1:
i repeat it is all a scam. Till they heal yinka ayefele or cobhams. People with real sicknesses are prevented from entering during those so called miracle services. They have arranged people

I rest my case as your points are valid.

ednut1:
every one of them is a scammer

You're insistent and I want to assume you're not a church goer.

pocohantas:
You sound so much like Futurefocûs. They will accuse him of one thing and he will be talking about another thing. Maybe it is the F in y’all monikers.

A mema vawulence tutu (ibibio), na police invite remain.

ednut1:
Every pastors doing miracles are scammers. They are all staged

Isn't "Every" too much of a word to classify them sir?

Amazingoreofe:
Hello mamas in the house.

1. Please I'll like to ask. When is it advisable for one to stop working.

I'm presently 35weeks.

I still feel very fine. Tho slight backaches, stomach tightening and all that. But really mild. nothing serious.

I asked my doctor in 33weeks appointment he didn't give a definite answer.

Hubby is advising I stop by 37 weeks but I don't like to be at home without working(I enjoyed working)

What's the advice please?

2. Secondly the last scan I did was at 13weeks. I haven't been asked to do any other scan. I Brough it up with my friend who is also pregnant. And she said she has done a couple of scans...please is this normal?

1. I think you should stop when you no longer feel strong enough for office stress. On a second note, I was advised to stay till I fall into labour so as to have my complete 3 months Maternity leave. I was lucky to have fallen into labour on my Antenatal appointment day....I had 2 weeks from the previous year of which my husband was always asking me to take advantage of it but I no gree.
I went on 2 weeks outstanding annual leave, now on my 3 months Maternity leave and negotiating taking 2 weeks in my current annual leave to make it 4 months.
2. I only did 2 scans when I registered for Antenatal. One upon registering during to my near abortion experience and Anomaly scan at 20 weeks I think.
You ought to do another from 20 weeks upward. During your next appointment, ask your gynecologist.

Carlyboi:
The things you said bout your cousin are just so funny I was compelled to leave a comment cos I wasn’t planning to do so...he would make a best seller if he should write a book on excuses...unfortunately people are just different you know our thoughts,personality and drive just vary in degree and kind!you just have to keep encouraging and tolerating him hopefully things get better for him someday soon..and reduce the rallying too that might show him the need for him to make his own money or have a source of livelihood!

We're trying to be tolerant but also trying to see that he makes hay while the sun shines as age is no longer on anyone's side.
He even posted on our family WhatsApp this morning an article that talks about helping siblings. I just dey look am. Thanks for your input.

Dear OP, the economy has a role to play with your son who may think his income is not enough for himself let alone contribute to the house. I think you need to be firm and allocate bills to him.
I have a cousin who graduated since 2013 and is still being fed by his single mum. He had always had an entitlement mentality which we ignored thinking it was just immature outbursts as we grew up together.
Years after graduation, he started saying the labor market favours women and never landed a good job. His younger sister graduated 2 years after him and got a job when she stormed the labor market. When I was job hunting, he always gave the excuse that white collar jobs isn't his calling....I'm going overboard.....if he's broke, na white collar job holders dey rally round for am.
He just believes he'll be rich one day, although he's an upcoming artist but we don't have money to sponsor him and get him up there. I pleaded with him to work Mondays to Fridays and use his weekends to pursue his passion as he'll have money to promote his craft to no avail.
It's tough love strategy we're trying to see if my aunt can apply to make him stand up.
You're lucky he's working but he needs to know that he has an obligation to contribute in the house as he may find it difficult to provide for his immediate family's upkeep or do so grudgingly.
Please talk to him and if he's adamant, tough love all the way.

Darida:
Hey mamas in the house,
Please help out a ftm here, what laundry detergent can we buy for baby because I heard the normal detergents we use for our clothes are not so good for new borns. Would appreciate suggestions biko

I read that normal detergents aren't safe but I've been using Sunlight detergent to do my child's laundry and my son is clocking 3 months in few days time and I've never seen any reaction on him apart from heat rashes due to the scorching heat from the weather.

kokaiye:
Ah... It is plenty in dt side ooo

Okay.

kokaiye:
u knw dt diaper isnt dt common u know... We r even lucky to hv it in lagos n it even depends on d area of lagos u can find it.

I didn't know it wasn't common. I'm at Ikorodu and that's the brand that's common here.
I see that it's made in Ogun state.

kokaiye:
oh my kiss kids!!!! I love dt diaper frm moon to back!!! Very fantastic smtin.

Yes o. Super absorbent but it's not in Benin as I'm only able to access it in Lagos and I'm going back to resume work in Benin but I'll look for it

Congrats OP, I had to look up what QMUL is....I learnt something.
Please are the children bearing the names at the same time or they can be called any of them?

oliy24:
Its was the new card. The old expired since march 2021

Wow....sorry about it

Sorry about your experience OP, did you confirm if it was your nee or old debit card that was used to perpetuate the act.

PastorMIsBack:
Careless or Cardless because I'm now confused

Lol....thanks for bringing it to my notice. I've corrected it.

Ifakiland:
Una go just dey post useless imaginary fake story....which one be careless withdrawal, we be like mumu for your eyes

Uncle, this is 2022 o! There's cardless withdrawal.

pocohantas:
Person wey create thread to hit frontpage, you no want make e insist? Hahaha

Kikikiki.....off your microphone I plead egbon mi but someone made a submission that if the salary is paid by the vendor being an outsourced staff, the likelihood of verification of the account number is slim but what do I know.

pocohantas:
Even at that, I very much doubt the Accounts team of a Top5 bank missed that. If the Top5 banks are the ones I have in mind, then I might boldly say again that this never happened.

I'm finding it hard to believe as I wrote earlier but the OP is insisting it happened.

pocohantas:
It is IMPOSSIBLE for a new bank employee to be paid salary in a wrong account. What exactly was your friend employed as?

Most banks (I tried hard not to use every) have bespoke staff account numbers that once you hear the first three digits anywhere, you know that is a staff or ex-staff. No bank would allow you use any account for salary. Banks are very organized, give them that.

I am afraid this doesn’t add up. In fact, it never happened.

It may happen as some banks use Savings salary account for outsourced staff which is a product that can be issued to walk in customers.