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Family / Re: Marriage: Before And After by liberalchick(f): 10:36pm On May 28, 2020 |
Angelfrost:Yea, marriage is not a bed of roses but some DO have easy marriages. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: Marriage: Before And After by liberalchick(f): 10:34pm On May 28, 2020 |
unmask:Most people want children more than they want marriage. However, for an organized society, marriage is necessary for a two parent, child rearing. Not every child will have this for circumstances beyond their control but most children do and that’s good for society. I still think marriage is unnatural. Also, some societies have made marriages civil, there are benefits attached to being married. I guess it’s that society’s way of encouraging marriage. 1 Like |
Family / Re: Marriage: Before And After by liberalchick(f): 2:00pm On May 28, 2020 |
cococandy:Absolutely! I should have highlighted that in my post. The timeline is not applicable to every marriage. Also, was going to grad school for the first three years of my marriage, juggling marriage, kids, and a hectic grad school was challenging. Going into marriage and everyone telling me the first few years are growing pains kinda helped me not freak out too much and settle into it. Dyt, it wasn’t my intention to be all doom and gloom lol, that’s not reflective of all marriages and mine. I was just trying to be as honest as I can. I would definitely not trade my family for the world. 17 Likes |
Family / Re: Marriage: Before And After by liberalchick(f): 9:47am On May 28, 2020 |
Carchoice:No, I didn’t marry the wrong person. I am just being realistic, living with someone for the rest of your life will not always be romantic and easy. There are different stages in marriages where it’s excellent, good, bad, sometimes ugly and then neutral. Also, when people say their marriage is easy, sometimes it’s one sided, they are probably oblivious of their partner’s sacrifice to make the marriage an easy one for them. 241 Likes 16 Shares |
Family / Re: Marriage: Before And After by liberalchick(f): 9:38am On May 28, 2020 |
An ‘easy’ marriage is not common even for those in-love. Sometimes I think the concept of marriage is unnatural but necessary. If I am single again (knock on wood) in the future, I wouldn’t want to get married again. Some marriages have its ebbs and flows. The first two years can be difficult for obvious reasons. Then marriage challenges in year 8 (that’s generally the time some marriages hit a wall). DH and I are in cruise control now, children are getting older, careers are taking off with more responsibilities. They say if you make it past year 7-8 unscathed, you are good. Modified. 114 Likes 10 Shares |
Family / Re: Wife Trying To Ruin My Career Within A Few Months Of Arriving Abroad by liberalchick(f): 12:19pm On May 25, 2020 |
Hathor5:Of course we all know some men that don’t hit women and hate domestic violence. However, to say “many” that’s not reality. 1 Like 1 Share |
Family / Re: Wife Trying To Ruin My Career Within A Few Months Of Arriving Abroad by liberalchick(f): 12:13pm On May 24, 2020 |
Hathor5:Lol where?? This isn’t condemning domestic violence, “I don’t support domestic violence o, but...” then go on to tell the woman to forgive and stay in her marriage and try not to provoke the husband too much that being a man is not easy. Many Nigerians (men and women) believe if a woman talks back during an argument, a slap or a belt like on the thread I read yesterday, is not out of place. Only TWO people on that thread commented it wasn’t normal for a husband to belt his wife. Nigerians only care about DV when the victim is dead or very visibly battered. That’s when everybody will remember their favorite phrase “why didn’t she leave?” When a wife is being slapped around or beaten sometimes most people don’t view it as DV, it’s normal in a marriage. The truth is, here in the US, most Nigerian women don’t report DV, they are still bound by the Nigerian culture of silence. Most times, it’s a neighbor, a school teacher, a co-worker that reports and 9/10 the woman always declines to press charges. It’s always sad to see it. 5 Likes |
Family / Re: Wife Trying To Ruin My Career Within A Few Months Of Arriving Abroad by liberalchick(f): 3:29pm On May 23, 2020 |
eyinjuege:Lol don’t mind them, when they realize the nonsense they do back home to their wives is illegal in a civilized country they start crying “law favors women in the West” I deal with a lot of them here. They act surprised and feel victimized when they are not allowed to abuse women. Hehehe. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
Family / Re: Wife Trying To Ruin My Career Within A Few Months Of Arriving Abroad by liberalchick(f): 2:32pm On May 23, 2020 |
LinLinGentle:Nice of you to give an update. This is for the Nigerian men that have deluded themselves with the lie “the law favor women”. FYI for the bolded, the law as is doesn’t care about gender. You do the crime, you do the time. You can’t just lie to the police and the justice system that you were abused and because you’re a woman your alleged abuser will be prosecuted and sent to prison without evidence. 7 Likes |
Family / Re: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by liberalchick(f): 10:31pm On May 22, 2020 |
Conveniently all the anti-bullying superheroes are missing from this thread. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Family / Re: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by liberalchick(f): 10:27pm On May 22, 2020 |
KanwuliaExtra:Oh ok. Some of these women don’t really mind the cheating/love child, they only leave when the cheating has been exposed so as not to look ‘weak’. Ditto Wendy Williams. Wendy wouldn’t have left if Daily Mail didn’t break the story. She knew the mistress was pregnant and she wasn’t going to leave. In the West, especially celebrity women get bashed for not leaving a cheating spouse. So the women invent stories like “break babies” to justify staying with the cheat. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: I Did This To Save My Marriage by liberalchick(f): 10:21pm On May 22, 2020 |
Donald3d:Lol exactly! OP, what did you do? 1 Like |
Family / Re: ... by liberalchick(f): 10:18pm On May 22, 2020 |
Queenttoast01:When you woke up did you feel any pains, pain you get if your neck was being strangled? 1 Like |
Family / Re: A Pregnant Lady Seen Slapping And Beating Her Boyfriend With Belt For Cheating by liberalchick(f): 3:41pm On May 20, 2020 |
Juell:Right, also report her for assault. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: How Will You Handle A ❤️-CHILD In Your Marriage? by liberalchick(f): 2:45pm On May 20, 2020 |
yvelchstores:How is she mixing it up? Women have love children too, only the husband thinks it’s his. 11 Likes |
Family / Re: Nature Didn’t Wire Anybody To Be Anything,society Did by liberalchick(f): 2:36pm On May 20, 2020 |
JourneytoEL:No lies detected. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: Your View(s) About Adopting An Unwanted Pregnancy Without Any Legal Process by liberalchick(f): 2:27pm On May 20, 2020 |
The older couple are fostering the child for the legal mother. 5 Likes |
Family / Re: She Is Rich And Has A Good Job by liberalchick(f): 8:09pm On May 13, 2020 |
Takotsubo: One of my first posts on NL was one similar to yours. We could literally be the same person. I’ve since spent enough time on NL reading and participating on lots of threads to now know that Nigerian women can’t afford to be all 50/50 in their marriages like women/wives in Western societies because the average Nigerian man and the society does NOT believe in the concept of true partnership in a marriage. Yes! the man will gladly accept your financial contribution but that’s where the partnership ends, the woman is still expected to carryout her ‘roles’ and she’s still NOT treated as an equal partner in the marriage. I fully support Nigerian women that have refused to take on more roles without reward. Then, the laws?? None recognizes any financial contribution the wife makes in the marriage. As a wife you can still get kicked out legally of the house you helped build/rent with the clothes on your back. 5 Likes |
Family / Re: Placing The Wrong Emphasis On Work (aka Earning A Living) by liberalchick(f): 5:23pm On May 11, 2020 |
Bukatyne, you’re not a victim. I think it’s very unfortunate that you’ve decided to hide behind a wall of fake victimhood, rather than address the questions about the incoherent premise (which was on purpose) in your OP posted on a public forum. I see, hear and read a lot of ladies been advised to 'face their career (which is actually work sef) and think of marriage later'. You purposely redefined the popular phrase above so you can create a loophole in your OP. It’s actually pretty devious. When people disagree with what you actually mean, then you can always point out the “work” in your OP. So basically you invented a new meaning of a popular phrase that is easier to argue against. There is a word for that. The phrase has always been about getting your career on track before you get married, if you so desire. It has never been about work. This was a sloppy OP. 22 Likes 3 Shares |
Culture / Re: Aniomas And Ikwerre People Have Not Learned From History So Sad. by liberalchick(f): 7:06pm On May 07, 2020 |
Admissionclass:We also wished he didn’t. Thousands of innocent Asaba young men and little boys wouldn’t have died for a war or a cause they pledged no allegiance to. Ojukwu got to live out his natural years, same can’t be said for the Asaba victims. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Culture / Re: Aniomas And Ikwerre People Have Not Learned From History So Sad. by liberalchick(f): 6:49pm On May 07, 2020 |
OP please know your history. Biafrans invaded and occupied the region. They installed Igbo army generals to control the region. They needed that region to take the fight to Lagos. The region was not consulted and no allegiance was given. Biafrans were defeated at Ore, they retreated and blew up the bridge, essentially trapping Asaba people with the invading Nigerian troops. The massacre that ensued is the fault of Biafra and the Nigerian troops. ANIOMA is not Igbo. We have a very different culture and lifestyle, “Delta Igbo” is a misnomer. Unfortunately, our fathers were not proud of our heritage so they gave their kids Igbo names to blend with a dominant culture. ANIOMA people have their own first names. We have names like and they sound nothing like Igbo. Anupu, Isama, Otunniya, Okwanuzor, Ishicheri, Okwubiri, Ebinum, Egwenum, Osanebi, Ossai etc Most ANIOMA languages and Igbo is not even mutually intelligible. Some Languages in ANIOMA have Benin in them, phenotypically, ANIOMA look nothing like the Igbos, also River Niger would have made it much more difficult for the migratory trend to have been from the east. After migration and later trading is responsible for the Igboid in the ANIOMA group of languages. 10 Likes 1 Share |
Business / Re: Abakaliki Mall, Ebonyi Taking Shape (Pictures) by liberalchick(f): 4:19pm On May 05, 2020 |
It’s 2020 and we’re building malls in Nigeria?? What a waste. 1 Like |
Romance / Re: I Easily Lose Interest In Guys, Will I Regret This? by liberalchick(f): 10:19pm On Dec 26, 2019 |
Michellekabod2: Ignore the immature comments. I don’t understand why this thread is getting so much hate. Nigerian men don’t like honest women, you tried to be as honest as you could in your self introspection, you’re unhappy and you want to change and you asked for advice on how you can sustain a healthy relationship. So what’s bad in that? It’s the fake it till I get the ring women that fit Nigerian men. Next time open a new moniker (m) and flip the gender in your thread, you will get much more objective posts. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Romance / Re: I Easily Lose Interest In Guys, Will I Regret This? by liberalchick(f): 9:39pm On Dec 26, 2019 |
healthserve:WTF is wrong with you? Obviously your ‘advice’ is not in good faith. Your million likes is not enough for you now you’re doing a victory lap all over her thread. You’re very immature. Mich, this is the reason people use a different moniker to seek advice on this forum because some people here are very childish, they can never be objective when they have a beef with a moniker or worse if it’s an (f). So childish that even if you open a thread that you cured cancer they will still find a way to cuss you out. As some people have mentioned already, you’re probably introverted/too smart for the company you keep and none so far has been able to hold your attention long enough. You’re still young, go out as much as you can and meet people. You will finally meet the one, ignore all the threats of Shiloh. 8 Likes |
Crime / Re: Police Has Arrested The Woman That Flung Her Underage Maid- Picture by liberalchick(f): 2:22pm On Dec 22, 2019 |
This isn’t enough, the parents or guardians of that child should also be arrested! 1 Like |
Family / Re: Should I Move Out ???? by liberalchick(f): 2:17pm On Dec 22, 2019 |
ocmarion:Taking the kids with you without her consent is a huge mistake for your future child custody battle and it’s also kidnapping. Get a lawyer, start from today, record and document any and everything that would prove you’re the fit parent to get physical custody of the kids. However, the timing is not in your favor. You’ve to explain the seven years of marriage where she was a stay at home mom and your kids were fine. You’ll have to explain how a mother can be unfit in such a short period. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: Should I Move Out ???? by liberalchick(f): 1:53pm On Dec 22, 2019 |
Pavore9: She doesn’t have to be mentally unstable, all OP needs is to prove she is an unfit custodial parent. I can see three things he can use, if he can prove it. Her hectic work schedule, the children being exposed to weed and the uncle. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: Police Is Looking For The Woman That Mistreated Her House Help. by liberalchick(f): 1:41pm On Dec 22, 2019 |
The girl’s parents or guardians should also be arrested. 1 Like |
Romance / Re: On The Viral Sex Tape Video by liberalchick(f): 2:36am On Dec 21, 2019 |
I am just seeing this thread, you didn’t tag me well. |
Family / Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by liberalchick(f): 12:01am On Dec 21, 2019 |
Michellekabod2: Thanks Mich. I thought it meant the law was “rubbish”, anyways, I didn’t think it deserved a response. To the above, generally, if the retaliatory force is comparable to the one you received then it’s not an assault. The aim of the law is, provocation is not an excuse for a physical beatdown. If you’re going to give someone a beatdown then your life must have been in danger or you had no means to escape. The law no longer sees you as a victim. I agree. It’s always best to keep your hands to yourself don’t go slapping or hitting people. If you can, always walk away from provocation. Also, believe it or not those provisions for defense of an assault is in the Nigerian criminal code, it’s not just a “Western” law but laws are rarely enforced in Nigeria. Ironically, if people are on the receiving end of a slap/provocation by a bigger and stronger person, they’ll walk away and bemoan the lawlessness in our country, most people don’t like the law until they need it. 2 Likes |
Family / Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by liberalchick(f): 8:39pm On Dec 19, 2019 |
Plead: If you’re asking if the boyfriend’s use of force will still be justified, if he can prove the following: - threat to life - no means to escape - comparable force Then, it is. If he can’t, then it wasn’t. The appropriate action is to report his girlfriend to the police. Of course this is the law in my neck of the woods. If you’ve a violent significant other, I advise you check your local laws on assault and battery or you breakup with her. |
Family / Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by liberalchick(f): 9:30pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne: Lol, good for you! What does what you would do personally to prevent a physical beatdown got to do with how the law has defined fair justification for the use of violence The law is very clear on the definition of fraud but personally, we take precautions to avoid been a victim. Ditto any crime. What’s your point? 6 Likes |
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