₦airaland Forum

Chelseafan1:
Hahaha, this was my experience exactly a year ago. Omo, I felt I could never do without her, I loved her silly but then she cheated, I forgave her, she secretly cheated again, I forgave her again until she did it the 3rd time. I had to let go patapata, it's almost a year we broke up now and I am over her for good. I am very very happy now.

At first, it's normal for you to miss her but I beg u, never ever go back to her, do not accept her, she prefers the other guy to you, trust me. It's hard to accept but that's it.

You have to accept the fact that, even tho you see yourself as amazing, not every girl would find you attractive, that's just life.

If you take her back, she would cheat on you again.

Just let go, forget her, you'll be fine.

I wee give u my bae for one week, true... ...exactly@accept that fact..especially when you are comfy and yet, a lady still cheats, na wa o..wat else na..in my case, i was fresh in d labour mkt, the olodo went for someone who just got a job and commenced training. This same guy never told her about the job o; na snapped ID card him use. As luck would have it, i got a job with a bigger company in the same industry exactly a year later and resumed 7.5 months after.

Kokaine:
hahahahahaha @serial cheater lol

i can imagine this girl calling me to ask for a thing like that, I'd meet up with her just to slap that mouth.

Lwkmd@slap dat mouth..honestly..i cudnt believe my ears that day at work. When i got home that evening, part 2 started. Whatsapp messages about how she let her pride et all come in the way of her happiness; that she knows she wud be alot happier and more fulfilled if she were with me...lots of histrionics..for my mind, i just said, "ogbeni, koshi jor..mk i see road" because i only see her as someone who is desperate to clinch to a successful man; she doesnt wanna build hers.

Kokaine:
yes! cheating is enough to end a relationship. where there is no trust, all you have left is a vast depth of dust and air

You messed up. You just wasted data by replying her and you just made me waste mine for cautioning you. What a dumb post you replied to.

alanka:
So people of this generation are still hoping and believing that they can find faithful partners.

If 10 of every 11 girls within the age of 18 to 25 are not virgin then we can equally say the probability that a married woman or a fiancee will not be faith to her spouse is 10/11= 9.9 or99%

And will all know that even 999 of every 1001 are not virgin so where are you going to find the faithful?

With this it means there very high tendency (99%) that a wife or fiancee will not be faithful

Get yourself a baby mama if u cant commot your face

Smh

MissCuppy:
She was feeding your ego by continuously begging you and you were busy forming, now you are feeling lonely and missing her.


Not every woman will beg you, if she manage to do so, try and forgive her, she put her self esteem on the line by begging you at the first place.

You are INCREDIBLE.

LePrezident:
Been there done that.

1. Cut every form of contact. Social media and all. Delete her number

2. Get very busy with work and set work/career goals to achieve.

3. Go on a punna chase and score as many as you can. Some people will advise against this but tell you what, this is the most effective of all the steps.

4. Stop stalking her on social media. Get a life!

5. Do more fun stuff. Like learn a hobby (learn a new dance, learn to swim, pick up an interest in foreign languages; preferably French)

6. Go on a holiday.

7. Avoid romantic music and stop visiting places you both used to go together.

"1 - 4" was exactly what i did. CUT ALL TIES FROM MUTUAL FRIENDS TOO, ESPECIALLY THE FEMALES.

Kokaine:
Hi nairalanders. i came under this moniker because i want to be discreet.

I met this girl some months ago, we became close, and one thing led to the other, we started dating.

Of all the girls I ever dated, this one came closest to my heart. I'm ordinarily stingy to girls when I date them, especially the ones i feel don't really love me for any other reason than what they hope to benefit. In fact, my last relationship ended because of how tightfisted i was with her. But in the case of this girl in question, I was so free, i gave her easily, it got to the extent that my cousins and closed friends started suggesting that she put a hex on me. i really loved her. my whole life changed when she came in, i became very happy, always wanted to be with her, for every contract i took, i shared a small part with her and she was happy, whenever there was a misunderstanding, she apologised, she was never the type to climb a high horse. I wont lie i saw her demands for material things increase uncontrollably, i became responsible for everything she wanted and needed, her cream, her clothes, phone, laptop, subscription, even ordinary airtime! haba! airtime oh!!! but i wasn't all that disturbed because i felt i could endure the burden just because of how happy and lively she always made me feel, practically the same addiction my neighbour has for weed even if its with his last dime

The trouble started when i went to her place one day and she was not around, my phone was almost dead, i decided to charge it in the abokis place near her house. Then i saw what looked exactly like her phone charging. I mean; her phone cover is very spectacular to me, looks like rabbit ears with lights that come on whenever you touch it. i asked about it, he told me it was hers. God so did it that he allowed me to check the phone, i had known her pattern a long time ago but she didn't know.

Brothers and sisters! When I opened this phone, and saw her chat with someone whose name she saved with "miracle" she was obviously cheating! I copied the number and dialled it on my phone with truecaller, i saw the complete name, i opened facebook and checked that name, it was a guy, he was on her facebook too. she had been seeing this guy. the dates on their whatsapp chat confirmed that certain times she left my house and said she was going to her brothers house, that was where she actually went.

For the first time in my life i was broken, i had to break up with this girl. but i wanted to think about it thoroughly because i feared loneliness and the loss of happiness that breaking up with her will bring me. i did anyway.

She begged and begged promising to break up with the guy, i just don't know why i refused, i told her we could be friends, but now as i type this, she seems to Have moved on, she has never called me again nor sent any message, neither have i, but everyday that passes by, i gradually see myself going back to my old state of mind, you know one that makes you lonely even in the midst of people. i really miss her now, I'm thinking i should have forgiven her, but then i know i have to be a man, i see her posts on instagram, she is still so beautiful in my eyes, i cannot hate her however i have tried, this is very unlike me, i want anyone who has ever experienced this to tell me how he did it. Thanks so much. one love!

I have though not exactly like yours. I felt i was never gonna love again. You have to up your productivity level so as to up your income. I did exactly dat, last year, i met someone and we started dating recently and the rest is history. Before we started to date, we became so close that, as couples, we still see eachother as besties..the teasing no be here.

Lastly, just as predicted, the serial cheater then called me while i was at work to seek my attention; i told her i couldn't talk. She called mins after to beg for 5mins and i said ok, I ll spare you sometime as friends that we are. She outrightly asked if there was any possibility of us getting back; i believe you know the answer that followed.........and, i also made sure she knows my sugarplum on IG via regular tags et all...So, bro MOVE ON..never settle for less.

jguy007:
On the 5th of July 2017, i resumed work at a prestige hotel in Ikeja through a man i met at a car wash while i was washing cars for stipend to earn a living. The day i met him, i just finished washing a car and i worked up to him and requested an audience, and then told him i was looking for a job because am a computer engineering graduate trying a make a living, and all this took place sometime around February. He agreed to help and I, without giving much though didn't bother him anymore cause i was already tired of telling people i needed a job when i already know jobs are hard to come by these days. But surprisingly he came looking for my with the MD of a hotel and (devil is a lie) i wasnt at the car wash that moment,i went to see someone. He waited and waited and at some point was angry,then he left only for me to return few minutes later to be told he came looking for me...i was mad
*******************fast forward to 2weeks back*************************
He called one early morning and asked to meet me at the car wash so i could go see the MD that morning and i did. She interviewed me for few minutes, collected my C.V and asked me when i would like to resume work.So eager i said the next day and she was fine with it.Ever since that day i never saw her again but i was going to work and enjoying it too
**************************4days later*******************************
While on my shift, i made some sales and then early that morning,on my off day( cus i sleep in the office and handover sales made earlier the next day to my colleague) between 2am and 3am, two guest worked in to book a room. I assigned rooms to them and they paid me cash. I then handed the money to my colleague that was on duty that morning and went home only to return the following and discover while going thru the records that she only recorded one out of the two rooms i sold for her that morning. I searched the whole books for that room but couldn't find a trace of it, then i knew something was up. I never confronted her about it but i just decided to watch if twas gonna happen again.
**************************4days later after that*******************************
A similar thing occurred and this time so obvious. Four friends came in early in the morning on my off day and one of them paid cash for two rooms which i allocated to them and again gave the money to the same colleague before leaving that morning.On returning on my shift, she wrote down the two rooms sha but wrote 1POS and 1CASH, which was a lie cause i was the one that collected cash from them and they never paid thru POS.
**************************back to present day*******************************
Have been thing of confronting her directly but i cant cause i noticed too that she isnt alone in it, the manager is in with her and they are kind of close(i noticed it on the first day of resumption)
I also thought of telling the man that made me get the job cause later i found out that the MD is his wife, which was a shocker to me cause till now i didn't submit an application letter or bring in any guarantor before i got the job.
I don't wanna betray his trust either cause this might be a test to me
PLease friends what do i do?
NB: AM SURE THIS ISN'T THE FIRST TIME ITS HAPPENING....SHE OR SHOULD I SAY THEY HAVE BEEN DOING IT BEFORE I CAME. I DON'T HAVE PROOF OF THAT BUT I GUESS SO CUS NOW THEY THINK AM DUMB SINCE I DIDN'T NOTICE THE FIRST FRAUD ,WHICH I DID BUT KEPT QUIET THAT'S WHY THEY COMMITTED ANOTHER.

Oga, REPORT ASAP.

Bluestreams:
Profile: 10yrs old Nlander, Postgrad, 32yrs old, 2 yrs old in marriage with a 1yr old son.

Pls kindly read patiently and advice me if I am wrong and also what to do if my spouse is the problem. Thanks.

I got married as the first child out of two and my family (mother) really supported me financially. At this time, I didnt have any salary job neither do I have any contracts running as I do pest control and landscaping services and other small legal hustles. I met my wife who is a civil servant and we fell inlove and I never hid my financial or employment status from her. Shortly before my wedding (I was also job hunting for a better job) I got an interview in a top oil and gas firm in the country by insider recommendation, and being the only one invited I felt I've gotten it. My fiancé started telling her sibs that I'm already a staff which I frowned at because I've not received any appointment letter. This she was doing in "faith" anyway. Subsequently, I was never called for that job again and by this time we were already married. Prior to this time, I got a slightly less than 50k job in a bank and after a few months my fiancé pressed me to resign athough that job was stressful and in another state where I neither had family nor friends.

We got married then the issues began.
I noticed my wife is the type of woman thats slow (I'll not use the word lazy). She cant keep up with my pace when we walk, she can't clean the house daily, she'll prefer I do the house chores while she watches tv and all. We were in honey moon so I didn't have a problem with that, and more over I enjoy such chores and I am a good cook. By this time her salary was dropping and we were living on it coupled with whatever income that comes from me from my business (my wife isn't stingy with her funds and neither am I).

Our problems started when she became pregnant just a months after wedding. She became super slow due to the preggy and I had to do like every every due to the initial sickness and all. Also, I noticed my wife doesn't know how to talk to people. She isnt rude or insolent but she can argue blindly and just keeps talking. She talks too much and doesn't know how to ignore things. She will say she likes speaking her mind, even though I adviced her that she will have lots of enemies by that lifestyle.

My parents live in the same town with me but hers are in the village. If things gets a bit rough I do visit the family shop and pick things on credit and pay later. This happens only when I'm low on budget.

After our honey moon, my wife refused to go back to work (her station is in another state) although she has been complaining that she doesn't like the job (her father helped secure it). Since she couldnt travel she kept calling the offixe and they were still paying her, only for some of her seniors whom she isn't in good terms with write against her and her salary stopped coming in. By this time I had to up my game and started husting harder. God another low paying job which didn't last and I continued with my biz. I lost the job because of lateness due to taking care of a pregnant wife and so on. In fact I lost 2 other jobs of same nature and wasn't bothered because they pay was very poor anyway.

When my wife put to birth, my mother (as hers is late) asked her to stay at our family house for a week,so she can look after her because I was still working at this time and my mother's business and other engagements is just around the house, my wife refused. Infact its not the refusal that touched me but the attitude she put up. Shortly after then I needed to relocate to a new aprtment and asked her to go over to the family house with the baby so I can move things which she did and the outcome of that visit was a heated quarrel with my mother. She accused her of telling my church members not to visit her after childbirth (my house is very far from the church) and even though it was a lie and I told her to shut up she kept on talking so many trash.

At home I cant talk to my wife and she keeps quiet. The will tell me to shut up to my face and one one occasion I landed her a small slap which left an eye bloodshot and this ended the shutup episode. Often times, if I talk she will raise her voice.

Four months after my wedding her father called me sounding angry and asking me why my wife is still with me, why she hadn't gone back to the state where she works, I overlooked. Some months back late last year, he repeated the same thing and even dropped the phone on me and just a week ago it happened again. My wife have refused to go back to work saying she will rather start a particular type of biz (which I'm trying to setup for her) but her family is talking behind my back all manner of absurd things.

My wife and I have been having our own bouts due to her attitude. I don't talk to neighbours again as she confided in one and laid bare exclusive family secrets and they had a quarrel and in front of my landlord, my neighbour spilled the beans and I felt so ashamed. My wife's salary has been stopped for over a year now and I have been solely the bread winner. I even got a car recently and uses it for transport to support other income.

My wife can nag about everything, she can wake me by 3am over petty things so I stopped sleeping in our bedroom and now sleeps in the guest room. If she's angry she'll not wash plates I eat with. This is someone I always wash her clothes and my with the machine since I married her. But she can hardly do same. If she cleans the house its favour and she'll keep murmuring. If we have an argument she'll start shouting, abusing my whole family and stuff.

This morning we had a quarrel and my wife told me I cant even take care of my family to provide for her, talking how she's leaving (she always tells me she'll leave and I've made it clear I'll gladly wait for that day).

I have been thinking about everything myself, since I married things have not really improved. Maybe I really made a wrong choice or rushed things (as I now believe), so I am planning on sending her away soon and them take me dad and kinsmen to her father (as is the culture in my place) for him to either caution his daughter or take her back because I might really injure her out of anger one day.

This is my last effort to save this marriage . I have only slapped her once in 2 yrs.
I feel I should seek matured advice from experienced people here as I know I might be right in my own eyes.
I really don't know what else to do.

PS: I'll answer any questions you might ask me. Forgive any typo. Thanks.

You obviously rushed things, bro. NEVER MAKE THAT MISTAKE OF GETTING MARRIED WITHOUT A JOB; THAT REGULAR INCOME MATTERS gaan..

Moreso, you can't push her away. You ought to remember "for better, for worse" so, manage the situation.

YourImaginaryBF:
beautiful.

Point of correction ,VERY BEAUTIFUL

ArcGibson:
Yes o... Like three years ago self... The pikin girl go Don turn 3 self

The gal must be a slowpoke.guess she dint do her due diligence atal(and not well)..ur pal ll b so happy ehn...i can imagine..

lostnegro:
Make una free this guy now make una ask am him secret of success and stop hating me I wan know way jooo

Go to Ghana with a human skull n the rest is history..

Onyejemechimere:
Ray Hushpuppi has been hospitalized!

The Instagram big boy is reportedly in the hospital following a medical emergency, and according to him, its too much of champagne! Someone said he was hospitalized in a Gucci hospital! Lol!

Photos and a video below;

https://images.lailasblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/16160807/screenshot-instablog9ja.com-2017-07-17-04-05-45.png

Watch Video (https://www.instagram.com/p/BWnEX_Fhvz4/)

http://www.lailasblog.com/2017/07/breaking-hushpuppi-lands-hospital-alleged-medical-issue-photosvideo.html

Abi, mk u die troway..wat a waste of semen..oshisco..

ArcGibson:
THIS IS THE GUY THAT TOOK MY FRIEND'S FIANCE ALL BECAUSE OF MONEY. LADIES AND MATERIALS THINGS SHA. THE GIRL HAS BORN HIM A FEMALE PIKIN NOW... I KNOW THE GIRL WOULD BE REGRETING BY NOW COS I KNOW SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THE GUY IS INTO BEFORE SHE DID INTRODUCTION WITH HIM.

Introduction with King T-blac

SingleDad:
I dig. Was contributing to your comment

Thumbs up...

SingleDad:
Bro, she ain't a kid, and she's working.

Not referring to ur case specifically, just generalised using the sample talked about by the OP.

SingleDad:
I didn't read but u re right.

Dia was dis girl, we exchange numbers, three days later she was asking me for money , I was like, can't remember when i vowed to provide all your life needs.

Well, you know the end nah

This is a norm when you get the numbers of hungry and immature gals. So sad.

tosyne2much:
No shame for dia my brother

DesChyko:
Different strokes for different folks. To him, it's an achievement. After all, the sweetness in madness is best known to a madman.

There is no word that truly describes his foolishness; to him, this is maximum pleasure..smh..Short sighted fellow..

tosyne2much:
Nawa ooooh. The purpose of going into a relationship is becoming ridiculous everyday

Listen up, I have been dating my girlfriend for the past 15 years and I have never for once given her transport fare or spent one Naira on her. She transports herself to and fro from Nassarawa to Lagos, helps me with chores, cooks for me, treats me well in da other room and will even take me out and pay for date

A lady like that has become an extinct in this immoral world of slay queens

Lalasticlala, what is really wrong with ladies of nowadays?

If this is true, u suppose dey shame

JeffreyJamez:
Can I give? Your skull is filled with sawdust and ofio instead of a brain. When person don talk the one wey touch them they will start to play the mother and sister card. Lie say you never watch porn before?

Call a spade a spade, bro..avoid the sentiments. Simply put, she is too young for all these, especially when you reckon with how Africa looks at these things.

DamiBukola:
Your kinds are so naive, foolish, uncut and unreasonable.

Because he won under PDP, you have to dig up his past videos?

He is one million better than Rauf the Babalawo

You are the one who is naive; he only point out a wrong without political sentiments. I wonder why people attach sentiments to the obvious.

Odosa1:
I have been wondering for a while now about the new trend of our landlords or caretakers. In the past i knew that a year rent start runing from a particular month in a particular year on to that same month in the the nxt year. (e.g july 2017 to july 2018).
But I have come to notice lately that most landlords or caretakers insists dt a year rent runs frm a particular month in a particular yr to the previous month in the nxt yr (e.g july 2017 to june 2018).
I understnd dt a year consists of 12months and that a child who is born july dis yr will only plock a year whn it exactly july nxt year, but going by their calculations, it doesnt add up.
Please nairalanders help my ignorance by adding ur contributions on the comment section.
God bless u.
Cc.
Lalasticlala
seun
mynd44
abeg make una help us push am reach fp for more contibutions.

July 1st, 2017 to June 30th,2018. It should end a day before the date you moved in.

rien05:
I am 29 years old and I studied BSc.Geology. I currently work as a Procurement Specialist. I know that there are professional courses in Supply chain Management but I feel a Masters tops them. Well maybe i will just wait save up and maybe do CIPS

There are people who read a related course to what you do at work, have Masters in Supply Chain Magt and earn less than half of what you earn yet, you wanna quit your job for school.

PascalJ:
Well, what's ur first degree course? Well, if u are opting for MBA, that means u want to go for a career in management. I) How viable is that? (2) I also think that considering the fact u are scared of forfeiting ur job, then save seriously for some years, that is if u are still young and probably put in for the executive MBA. (3) Another option is probably going for a part time masters in Uniben in a science related course. U could reach me on 08167846370 on wats app for further discussion. Thanks

She doesnt wanna lose her job na.

bigtt76:
So because she schooled in UK she automatically should be given a blank check as salary? Haba she must earn am naaaa

Beautiful response; Since 35k is too small, she could otherwise set up her firm since she is rich enough to own and maintain a car.

ivolt:
You know the bold because you are a member ?

Abeg o ...

skydancer:
Waiting for every other bank to follow suit. Recession is over

GT started this around 4 to 5 days ago..

Hotshawarma:
common sense will tell you that if illuminati and the way they talked about the cult group is true then they would never send such messages on socia media literally begging an artiste to come and join them most especially a failed artiste like jaywon when there are bigger and more successful artistes and people all over the world ......there are many scammers out there pretending to be from illuminati...even some of them dey create different threads on Nairaland....use your street sense.......be wise

Illuminati members are top notch ppl, rich, intelligent and charismatic; not this one wey no sabi the difference between "i'm" and "am"

YelloweWest:
I still wouldn't want that. I'll just disconnect from such friend.

Lol..bro, dont deprive people of their happiness.

donaldking10:
U GAT ME CONFUSED.
IF SHE WAS GOOD, WHY THEN DID U LEAVE HER.

NIGGA CALL A SPADE A SPADE JARE!

Have you heard d words called distance, religion.....? And point of correction, dont refer to me as a "nigga"..

wildrose21:
Not every ex is a Jezebel. That a relationship doesn't work out as expected doesn't mean one or both involved are bad. Sometimes, some relationships are not just meant to be. I would rather my friend date my ex, if I know she is a jewel, than an outsider. The sea is big enough for all fishes, the sky for all birds.
BTW, I don't really think we should live by certain codes.. Different circumstances, different response. Peace

Best response. Exactly my perception about the subject. I'd rather give a good ex to a pal and not an unknown entity.