₦airaland Forum

Goddys:
To be frank with you, there is absolute nothing like yoni massage. All they do is introduce a way to get people release and get addicted to their services. Buy a lubricant and your bf will do same as they did.

There's no difference. Talking from experience

Exactly!

Amakavula:
I did similar research before we went, because I was afraid of it, it sounded tacky and more like a sexual act than therapy. And yes I did ask my Masseur why can't I just play for a hand job somewhere else because it's cheaper.

Firstly , it's done by certified therapists. The last thing I want is some weirdo putting his/her fingers into my vagina. Then the ritualistic preparation starts with Music , Yoga and Meditations which are stand alone services. That doesn't come with a hand job.

Secondly it isn't just the vaginal alone , as it comes with a full body massage also.

Thirdly, Yoni's job is to get you relax and ease stress. Sex is work and work is stress. You get tired after it even a simple hand job is full sexual practice but Yoni isn't. It is stimulation. Like learning how to drive with a video game, it's very different from the real deal.

We tend to feel great, or happy after sex most people take this for satisfaction after the act but it's not, rather hormones released by the brains to get your body conditioned and relax to get sex ; anxiety is the worst enemy of procreation and the brain understands this. But you get tired after, while Yoni wants to do away with that tiredness part. It stimulates and entices.

It's faking those sexual conditions so your brain is fooled in to releasing " happy " hormones which relax the body in preparation for sex.


Finally , it's not a hand job. Hand jobs are fast and rapid with intend to achieve climax. But Yoni is slow and sensual, more of feeling, touching -- heighting of the bodyy senses. It is slow, and gentle .

The fingers aren't going completely deep into the uterus, just 3/2 inches deep. And I didn't get wet , but I felt something.

The goal is not to get a climax or trigger your body sexual process but almost approach it.

.

I have never been approached. I have never known any gay man. Nice description, anyway, with how you and Chiamaka went down. This Amakavula has really seen things. Ahhhh! Chiamaka.

GloShare:
One time my former classmates saw me trekking on the road and brushed me off. Only if they knew I had 7m in my pocket. Another day we met at a party and I made sure to drop them all at home with my car.

I have an 8 digit account balance but I hardly ever try to impress. I actually visit the bank with slippers and most times I walk because I get bored driving.

People see me and conclude I'm suffering, but when they visit my house the story changes. They confess about their fake life and ask for help. I don't help.

I can never help anyone who wears better clothes than I do. I invest my wardrobe allowance into my business, they should invest theirs too, rather than wear the best clothes and shoes, and still take my money when I'm not even properly dressed.

Keep your money to yourself and don't be a Santa Claus. If you become a Father Christmas and waste all your money helping people and you go broke, no one will give you a damn. Even the people you helped will start giving you attitude and snubbing you. No one will help. When you are rich, people attach themselves to you to leech of you. No matter how much you spend, people will always have needs. Your money is for you and your family (wife and children). Anything that remains is inheritance for your children. It would be a shame if you are a millionaire and your children have nothing to show for it.

Let everyone go and work and be independent. You don't owe anyone anything.

purples25:
People are just too toxic for my liking. They judge like they've never fell before. They are always too tense, when they can be simple with you they choose to be complicated instead and act so judgemental over what you do and wear.

There are two roads left . Bear it, cuz they're never going to change. Two, you'll fake it if you can't bear the unnecessary disgrace anymore. It's just reality.

I like this OP's post a lot. May have made my day.

I really understand. A lot of people are too judgemental but you don't have to hang out with them. They can go to hell for all you care.

Undertaker001:
they say bring evidence and you are here typing what we have already seen countless times

No mind am. Na so people dey take fail exam.

BluntBoy:
Hopefully, she will. I have told her severally about something called packaging and even gave her examples. One is a small boy who services my generator but calls himself a civil engineer on FB. This is a boy who is yet to sit for WAEC, but he is already working with Julius Berger as a civil engineer; and he has Chinese bosses who pay him in dollars and per hour.

But she seems to believe that her friends are all truly doing as fine as the pictures portray.

Small children sha. She needs to learn that she owes nobody anything and she is not obliged to live up to anyone's expectations or standard. Just give her time.

BluntBoy:


The guy that services my generator, an apprentice o, describes himself as a Civil Engineer on his FB profile. He has not even written WAEC o. But you need to see his page. He has pictures of himself wearing civil engineering helmets with captions such as "at work with my Chinese bosses. Money tings". You never get to see these Chinese bosses because they are imaginary.

May God help these fake people.

Very soon, na oil and gas.

BluntBoy:
My little cousin worries a lot because she thinks her friends are doing better than her. And she deduced all this from FB posts and pictures. Very sad.

I tell her constantly that she might even be doing better than them. Why worry because of ordinary pictures?

Show her the OP to read and emphasis that she is not obliged to impress anyone. Social media is full of fake stuffs. Some celebrities are even living fake lives. Don't worry about her, with proper guidance, she will mature with time.

Estellie:
..My nebors need to read this... I love being myself, the crazy, happy, earthy Stella.. buh you'll see them blabbing all the time that I'm fuvking up, how??... This is me, Oga.. I can't be struggling to be who I'm not....


Fake people always have a reputation to maintain, real people just don't give a shiit.

Correct pickin. Carry go, nothing do you.

Waksdabos:
You sounds pained by this write up. Did OP hit you below the belt? You can still change from living a FAKE LIFE!

No mind am. He got so defensive as if I struck a nerve.

OdiaI:
About the "Fake it till you make it", I think the person who coined the sentence didn't mean it the way it is being interpreted. True.

I used to be very active in Paulo Coelho's Facebook page because I loved reading from him. I remember him posting 'Fake it till you make it' in one of his posts one day and I commented that I am surprised that came from him, I asked if he was encouraging people to be who they were not. Then one of his followers replied me and actually explained it in its actual context. Far different from how we see it. Of a truth, the explanation made sense but I didn't store it in my long term memory because then I was still holding on to my own understanding of the sentence.

Modified:

So I just looked up results from google for 'fake it till you make it' and I enjoin you all to try to read up the meaning. It actually means something good, more in line with the explanation given to me by one of Paulo's followers.

Please, let us clearly understand the origins of certain things before representing them as bad.

I used it as a lot of people here in Nigeria use it. I am relating with them based on their knowledge.

ajon1:
Guilty as charged! Will try to make amends henceforth

Correct guy. Carry go.

alaye123:
TO THE OP AND ALL THE PROPONENTS ON THIS TOPICS

My psyche tells OP of this thread is suffering from chronic jealousy or low self esteem. Nobody has the right or moral justification to tell people how to live life. As far as they are not breaking the laws of the land. There is no crime prescribed as FAKE LIFE. Humans are distinct and varies with different character. So you cant expect people not to show off or look presentable on a picture that is public. Do you expect people to put on worn out dress or a slum background just to prove they aint got money yet.

Some people are rich yet they hardly show off publicly while others galivant every where on cyber space. Same as the average or broke guys. Live your life and dont force others to agree on your school of thought.

Of course people can live their lives the way they want. The pressure to make it and impress people can get out of hands and lead to suicide. My topic might go a long way in putting sense into people and saving lives. If anyone doesn't like my topic, they can ignore it. By the way, I never said people should wear rags, all I said is that people should be real. My psyche tells that you are guilty of living a fake life.

When we are born, our minds are at tabula rasa. What we know depends on our environment, experiences, exposure and, where possible, the indoctrination our society has given us. Reality is such that no matter what we believe, it doesn't change and it doesn't care about our feelings. Given that many grew up believing the wrong things and are still believing these things, I find it important to set things straight. It might be that many are sensible but still not aware of certain things. Without wasting your time, here are hard facts about life.

1) THERE IS NO GOD AND YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN : a lot might not agree but I challenge you to show me any evidence that god exists. Your life struggle is yours to bear and no god is coming to help you out. No matter how much you pray, what god you believe in and how morally upright you are, nature will always take it's course and if you don't do the right thing, you won't get the right result. Religion, psychic stuffs and other spiritual stuffs are ridiculous falsehoods with no sound basis in reality. Do away with them and start facing reality.

2) THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE : once you die, that's it. Your cease existing forever after you die and there is no coming back. So do all you want now that you are alive. This world is all there is, there is no spiritual/unseen world. This is where you succeed, this is where you fail. If you don't make it here, forget it and there is no second chance. This is where you are happy, this where you are sad. Once time has passed, it can never be regained.

3) PEOPLE HAVE THEIR PRICE : people are not moral. With the right amount of money and desperation, people will do immoral and mean things. For many, morality is only when it's convenient. Learn not to trust anyone for even your enemies may smile a lot. Money reveals people's true colour. When it comes to money, people are not to be trusted and are mean spirited opportunists. When you have money, people (men and women) will gather round you. They don't give a damn about you but your money. Learn to say "no," spend your money on yourself and leave the rest for your children.

4) SUCCESS IS NEVER GUARANTEED UNTIL IT IS ACHIEVED : that boy or girl that looked almost certain to succeed might end up turning out to be a "failure" in future. That boy or girl that was looked down upon might be the highest achiever in future. No one, I repeat no one, can know the future. You might do everything right and die before you reap the fruit of your labour. You might suddenly have an accident or disease that would render you useless no matter how bright you were. You might be lucky to make it. There is nothing like a way to make it in life instead all you have are principles that increases your chances at making it in life but chances are what they are and are not certainty. Until it is achieved, success is not guaranteed.

5) LIFE ON EARTH HAS NO PURPOSE : you exist for no reason. The universe doesn't owe you any meaning to your existence. The meaning your life has is the meaning you give to it. There is nothing like destiny and fate. Your life is how you plan it.

6) NOT EVERYONE WILL MAKE IT IN LIFE : we all know this but still like to act like success is our birthright because we think our life is in the hands of an imaginary god. Even if we all work hard, not all of us will make it and you could be among those that don't make it. Even among those that succeed, there will be variation. Some will make it early while some will make it late. Some will be privileged to be born in a successful family while some will be born in poor families.

7) YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL : that HIV you hear about can happen to you. That cancer you hear about can happen to you. That rape you read about in the news can happen to you. That ghastly accident you read on nairaland, newspaper and see on tv can happen to you. In short anything bad can happen to you. That untimely death you see and hear from wherever can happen to you. Who the hell are you to think that you are immune to these things?

THE UNIVERSE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT MORALITY. ALL IS CAUSE AND EFFECT : good things happen to bad people; good things happen to good people; bad things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. Do the right thing and you will get the right result. It doesn't matter whether your approach is legal or not (legality and illegality are man's construct), apply the rules and you will get the right results. Cause and effect agrees with the strong overcoming the weak that's why your corrupt and powerful politician can unduly put you in jail and you will rot there no matter how morally upright you are. Your saving grace is if there is a more powerful force to save you and keep him in check. The universe cares about rules and facts not morality and your constitution.

9) INJUSTICE, NO KARMA AND WICKEDNESS : The universe doesn't care about your wellbeing and disputes. That guy that raped you might never be caught and would go on to marry and be happy till he dies while you struggle to make a living. That rich guy that snatched your girlfriend or the girlfriend that cruelly snubbed you and went for a rich man might end up building a happy marriage and home while you keep on struggling. Justice is man's duty to uphold. That man that stole all your money might invest it and be successful while you rot away; that man or woman that stole your idea might use it to make billions while you rot away into oblivion and poverty; that fake friend that cruelly snubbed you during your hard time might live a life of fulfilment while you rot away in misery; that cultist that shot your sister might never be found and may go on to live a successful and happy life. There is nothing like karma, if man doesn't seek justice then justice will never be implemented. Sorry for you if you think god will avenge your hurt and fight your battles. Sorry for you if the person you want to bring justice upon is very powerful. Take heart, it's life.

... to be continued

Glorymax:
OP, you made your point but I doubt fellows displaying these characters will not take your advice. To them, they are living their lives and e no concern you.
These fake character display happens under my nose regularly.
You will see young boys and girls coming to pose and take pictures on a car parked in someone's residence, and by the building as well. There was one instance the owner was coming out to use his vehicle while some persons were taking different positions of photoshoot on his car - what a life are these young ones living these days.

As in. When many are succumbing to this pressure to succeed, the rate of suicide increases.

Amakavula:
way are you pain. I am been honest. Besides isn't like what I spoke about isn't prevalent in the society today. "suckers" is just to draw focus to how they are viewed in terms of potential mating partners by Is. I am undermining their struggles. After all men do same.

No I am not pained. Just had to point out what percieved as the needless harshness towards broke people. Anyway, carry go.

vikkimimi:
And what makes his OK.... fake life is fake life.
#change

He has a business for which he has to put up a brand and packaging. It is also okay to pretend so as to test people and know your true friends. Fake life to impress, belong and avoid shame is wrong.

Nuulife:
I detest fake life ehh.

However, I do involve in professional packaging which can appear fake sometimes.
When it comes to my personal life, I live Bellow my standard.

If i meet new people, I would tell you that I am a student (meanwhile, I am a working class).
If I go on first date, I would hide my car and appear as a street.
These help me to know how people accepts me and then, I will naturally put off fake people as much as possible.

I understand you but those are not the fake lives I am talking about. Yours is okay.

See as person fingers come have the size of some people's penis.

FruitCakes:
If you deceive yourself, it will be hard to get helpers. If you appear to be rich on social media, people will conclude you are rich

Very true, I concur.

Can we just stop living fake lives? Who exactly are we trying to impress? Boys, why are you always snapping pictures beside a car that isn't yours? Girls, why are lying that you study in the UK? Who are you trying to impress? I understand that the pressure to succeed along with your mates is high in our society but you must always be reasonable and not follow the band wagon. Stop telling lies and start being real. If people look down on you and don't want to be your friend because you are not making it then they are not your friends indeed. They are not worth going out of your way to please. Your true friends are those who are always by your side and treat you nicely even if you are a nobody. People live fake lives trying to avoid shame, impress and get acceptance, approval and praise from people who don't care a damn about them. This is a pressure from society that only the childish in mind succumbs to. This has to stop.

Since life is full of ups and downs, we would, at one point in time, be tempted to live fake lives to please people and get their approval, avoid shame and get their praise and respect. Don't do it. Be matured and know that people's perspective about you does not define you or determine your worth so stop trying to belong or impress people that don't even give you a penny. If you are already living a fake life, try to start strategically coming out with the truth because the longer you live a fake life, the harder it is to come out with the truth. It would be disastrous and embarrassing when people finally find out. If you come out clean and that girl or boy you are eyeing doesn't want you, let the person go. If you come out clean and those group of friends start misbehaving and don't want you anymore, let them go. Everyone cannot be your friend and what they think no dey put food for your table. If your status, bio or whatever on social media says you study in UK while you are here in Nigeria, remove it. If your status, bio or whatever on social media says that you are working at Chevron while you are actually jobless, remove it. It's better to live it blank than tell lies. Use your discretion to come out clean or if you can't come out, don't say anything at all and don't lie any further.

If you have a friend that is living a fake, don't judge them instead show them that you are never going to leave his/her side and try to make him/her stop living a fake life. If they decide to come out clean, be by your friend's side and be his/her pillar while they face the shame. This is 2019, I hope boys and girls would stop living fake lives and start being real. Anyone, even if it is your childhood or close friend that you may have helped, that is rich and looking down on you should go to hell. Stop this habit.

Some would say "fake it until you make it," if you don't end up making it nko? If the success comes when you are 50 something nko? You think success is anyone's birthright? The universe doesn't give a damn about anyone. Please, nairaland boys and girls that are guilty of this, let this stop.

For the sake of humour and education, share your experience living a fake life and if you were caught, share it. No one is here to judge anyone. If someone other than you has been caught (either by you or others) living a fake life, share it. If you secretly know someone living a fake life and that person hasn't been exposed yet, share it. Just share.


This is front page worthy. Please do the needful.



When you see that girl who says she is studying Medicine in the UK selling pawpaw at Mushin.

MrBrownJay1:
ARRANT NONSENSE!!!
the babymama issue has absolutely NOTHING to do with money, and all to do with SOCIETY. we live today in a society where people dont give a damn anymore about marriage, and are comfortable having babies out of wedlock.
yes your pastors would be pissed but the majority of babydaddies/babymamas dont really care.

as for rape, the day Nigerian women decide to press charges against such crimes, instead of hiding it in shame, that would be the day there will be hope for change in this issue.

Actually money is involved. Ladies try to hook rich men with pregnancy for financial reasons.

Na wa o. Poor people are still human beings. Being nice to poor people doesn't mean that you will marry them or get pregnant for them. It also doesn't mean that you must give money. YOU CAN BE NICE TO POOR PEOPLE AND STILL MARRY YOUR RICH MAN. Calling poor people suckers is mean and doesn't speak well of your personality. I have never treated poor people harshly even though I don't give them money because I believe everyone should go and work and not give birth to children that they can't take care of. Some of your posts and topics reeks of a heartless gold digging personality who, with great efforts, rationalises heartless gold digging. Are you sure you don't kpansh for career and monetarily favours? This is very very bad.

SarcasticMe:
The guy schooled you and you accuse him of veering off point.
He points out your lack of understanding of the Christian faith, but you remain headstrong on using your biased analogy to represent a belief you don't understand.

Johnydon22 that is schooling atheists like me is who you are claiming your re7arded creationist hippie is schooling.

Amakavula:
why are you attacking me Martinez39 did you see me in your dreams ?

I am not attacking you. I said it's possible that you are a hard working woman with dignity and it's also possible that you kpanshed for favours. This applies to those female bank leaders. I don't know you, I can't vouch for you instead I am open to all possibilities about your character. I repeat, nothing is as it seems. Besides, why couldn't you properly comprehend my post but felt that I am attacking you even when I am not. Is there something you have to tell me?

Barayeks:
Maybe if you say it a few more times you can make it happen.

Dimwit.

Those women are surely educated but you just can never tell if they kpanshed someone at a critical time to get some huge position. I may be wrong. Nothing in this life is as it seems. Even Amakavula might have kpanshed or might have worked hard all the way but you can never tell. I repeat, nothing in life is as it seems.

The madness of the left. The people have spoken and to seek to overturn the peoples vote is undemocratic and treason. Privileged assholes who are disconnected from reality.

frosbel2:
Believe me Seun, there is a reason why I placed Emphasis on Pentecostalism. I personally was a few hours away from death because of a slightly similar situation without the violence , and have known at least one person who died refusing medicine and resorting to prayer instead.

There are countless cases of people dying in churches and at home because of the supposed healing power of Christ . If this is true, then why did the prayer of almost 3 pastors and the whole church take me closer to the death bed than to recovery.


Happens more frequently than is published ; religion imho is an illness with varying degrees of affliction.

Lol. Many people are dying from rejecting medicine and using faith but you don't get to see them on the news instead more focus is given to the hypocrites called moderates who conveniently interpret the scripture to their convenience because everyone wants to hear that christianity is good and harmless. This suits people's feelings even though it's at the expense of reality.

I remember when I started taking this faith thing seriously and started getting involved in new generational churches, I decided to apply my faith to cure malaria. I snubbed my antimalarial for faith and I kid you not. What saved me was that I was at home due to the holiday and the excited me told my mum about my so called works of faith. There was fire on the mountain . My mum went hysterical and was pleading with me take my medication but I stood my ground and was wondering why my mum, being a christian, wasn't in support of my action, the irony. I later took my drugs after being talked into it by my cell leader who said "For peace to reign, obey your mum. It's not the drug that would heal you, it's Jesus." Can you imagine. This was many years ago and I wondered what would have happened if I was in the hostel and away from my mum's supervision. I was a small boy then and being an introvert and growing up in a household that is full of heavy (I really meany heavy) indoctrination into believing spiritual stuffs didn't help matters.

My mum hypocrisy got me wondering. Why would this woman who claim to be a christian and heavily believes in spiritual stuff act as if faith is magical thinking? I sensed this same hypocrisy in all christians I knew. It was always the same "we believe in god" but acting and thinking like god doesn't exist. I later started mixing out with people, joined nairaland and started observing human life. I came to the conclusion that despite the so much noise about god's existence and power, nature always took it's course regardless of what we believe. Religious people who have terminal cancer always end up dying. As a medical student then, I once asked myself "why am I studying medicine if there is faith healing?" Mehn, I was a young boy then and I did many stupid stuff because of the bible. Now, I am matured and I am an atheist. Exposure helps. The first set of atheists I came across on nairaland were Donffd (will never forget him), edibleketara and some others. They ganged up against me in one thread to argue against my religious beliefs.

Anyways, religious beliefs are not harmless. To survive, man needs the truth so as to make realistic approaches to solve his problems. Unrealist approaches can be dangerous. This is why I bash and debunk religious claims and why I am an anti-theist.

@Creativebae

Too bad you met an asshole. You can't always have a "yes" and you can't always meet matured men. If you don't get a "yes" or the guy shows himself to be an asshole, move on with your life. Don't give up, there are still good guys out there. One douchebag doesn't represent every boy.

apelike1:
Mr adviser!

Do you think most guys can read that shiits called green light?

If you want something you get it and don't behaving like a fool thinking you are giving green light

No wonder the decent girls always settling down with imbecill1e while the girls were eyes don tear dey settling down with nice guys!

Black women behaving low IQ

Check my last topic and you will be amazed. A lot of boys keep saying that girls should just give green light as if everyone can understand green light. Many boys are so perverted that any little kind gesture or admiration is seen as romantic interest. SMH

J4JUVENTUS:
Most girls will just be deceiving thier destinies, thinking say na we them de deceive.
I yav seen lies,that I don't even know where to start to share my experiences.Right now I forbid to trust anything called girl.
Some will know they are telling lies o,they will still be crying to convince you...
I fear who no fear girls oooo...

As in. I remember when one girl was convincingly telling my course rep that she is a virgin but little did she know that her ex-boyfriend had a video of their sexual intercourse and showed it to my course rep. My course rep said that if not for the video, he would have believed she is virgin. Girls.