₦airaland Forum

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/04/how-i-built-bombs-for-biafra-kaine/

It surprises me that Dr. Oragwu would seek to claim honor for himself while leaving the real brains out.
Engr. Kaine played THE significant role for Ogbunigwe.
Just a pity that he is too humble a man to go around claiming glory for himself. I hope that the Igbos will remember to give him the honor due to him. Engr. Kaine is a genius and was the former director of PRODAI met Ojukwu through Ukpabi Asika, the Administrator of East Central State. That is just about that.


"At first, I gave the proposal for making those bombs to some military officers but they didn’t take it seriously until when they had two weeks to the war and suddenly discovered that they needed so much. By the time Ojukwu saw the proposal and approved it, time had already caved in. But we tried our best and ensured that so much was done for the soldiers to have regular supplies.
But I made sure that those fighting around the area where I was producing were getting more of those bombs and explosives so that I did not need to start running around.
I must say that the fire brigade approach to setting up the bomb-making facility at that time was due to the general attitude of our people. I must also say that for the little we were to do, the Biafran government encouraged it and Dim Odumegwu Emeka Ojukwu was superb.
- See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2010/04/how-i-built-bombs-for-biafra-kaine/#sthash.PcNm6x1a.dpuf

Happy married life. I love the poses! They are great.

mutter:
It is wrong and demeaning to describe a person by his color or any other quality or attribute- black white, albino, gay, lesbian. A human being is so much more than this one quality.
That so called Albino is a human being with so many other qualities so why describe him as an albino. We have along way to go.
Because of the economical and other issues in society, we always need someone we can feel better than. By discriminating against a group we find a common ground to unite.

..or for those that fear God

aisha2:
Never fall into the " let me just marry " trap
Drown out all the noise, nothing wrong with being charitable I am like that, many people don't understand why, even you giving don't understand sometimes. You don't want to know how many times I was mocked by people close for having worn out shoes yet using my small money to pay a strangers school fees. I always thought something was wrong with me too. But what God has done for me now I couldn't have achieved with a thousand years of saving.
Some of the people I dated who broke it off with me or used style to pursue me told me this was the reason, they thought I was stupid, I don't blame them too because it also seemed stupid to me but God ways may seem stupid to man. Once I was in the hospital I had 15k and transferred 10k for a single mother to do a skill acquisition training because I felt if my surgery went wrong let her have something to fall back on
Guess what the lady dropped out half way through saying she lost interest, meanwhile that money could have been used to purchase some drugs I needed after surgery but I was busy thinking about someone else. That act cut me really deep but it didn't stop me, it was only this Christmas I forgave the lady. So imagine any " smart " man having to live with a person like me, off cause human sense will say leave this one she doesn't know what she is doing. I have a friend who over the years has raised over 100 million for sick kids yet he doesn't even have a car.
Ask him why he gives, is it a direction from God or what?
Please don't be desperate to marry because your family is complaining
Sit and have a talk with your man. Ask direct questions without interrupting ;
1. What are his plans for you and your baby?
2. Whats his timeline for these plans if any
3. Why does he give even when things are not rosy? ( listen attentively to this answer)

Respect! The greatest joy in life comes from giving and doing good. I get my greatest joy from giving and I have been subject to so much attack even from my husband and kids but deep inside I know they are proud of me. I know this because I catch them doing the same. mama we are doing it for you to make you happy. But I am not fooled. Respect Aisha.

@ Poster. The issue here is not if you should marry him but ARE YOU WORTHY OF SUCH A MAN. A man with morals and principles.
Now re think what you wrote. You want to take your child away from his bio- father who is an up right and good man. You want to take this child to a drunkard and spoilt brat to raise.

Abeg if you do not pity yourself, pity your child! Why do you want to mess the child up-

There are women that support the home financially today and have a happy home. This man will be blessed by God and and them you would be on the outside wailing and gnashing your teeth in vain.
As long as the father of the child is reasonable, please marry him. Most women that are single mothers are that way because the men rejected them, either by kicking them out or by making it impossible for them to stay.

It is wrong and demeaning to describe a person by his color or any other quality or attribute- black white, albino, gay, lesbian. A human being is so much more than this one quality.
That so called Albino is a human being with so many other qualities so why describe him as an albino. We have along way to go.
Because of the economical and other issues in society, we always need someone we can feel better than. By discriminating against a group we find a common ground to unite.

I don`t see much harm in it. Some men need time to get over their ex or ex`s. You have to handle it properly.
But the most stupid thing you did was to give him the go- ahead.
Now all you need to do is signal a stop sign since it is obvious he still listens to you.

The woman should return to her home.
Seperation leads to alott of evil.
On the other hand the man should move to the wife and when he is there, he may have better chances of getting a job. However it all depends on if the woman has the wisdom and common sence to make the family function, when the husband is out of a job.
Two years away from Home is too long.
For me this is not a marriage but a marriage laid on ice.

The senior brother is wrong.

A lap top is a personal thing that contains allot of stuff you download. You don`t need to give it to someone else.

There is a joy attached to having something new.

The younger one is likely tog get a better deal because technology improves and gets cheaper. So he cannot compare.

It is wrong and sad that he does not want his junior to have a good thing.

I remember when i was young my father bough 7 dresses on a trip he made. My senior picked the first four and left me with three. I went to my father to compplain, he said I had no right she was older. I pleaded and cried for over an hour. Finally convinced him that he should just look at what my sister picked and what she left for me. I just wanted him to look and not even comment. He finally agreed. When he saw it he got very angry with my sister and told her she was very mean. She really picked the very best, two skirt suits and two dresses and left me with two simple dresses. My father made her share it again , how I wanted it. She picks one, I pick one.... Seniors can be mean !

So you find it okay that your sister is living with a man that is not her husband Why should he ever marry her.He has everything for free.
I hardly ever use make up and my daughters do not use make up either. It is something you use on occasionally and not every day. The reason being that if you paint constantly you look horrible without make up and it spoils your skin. Today make up is like painting, remove it and you see the true beauty or ugliness of a woman.

Honor your father and your days will be long in the land that God promised you. This is the only commandment to which God added the reward you receive for doing so.
Family can only move from Generation to generation and record success if the teachings of the parents are transferred.

As for your mother- It s natural for women to be soft but she will bleed the most if one of the kids go astray.

Finally- the right road is narrow, it takes discipline and hard work to stride that part. You need to forfiet on many things that give pleasure.

The first thing you need to know as a young man especially in Nigeria is that you do not get your independence served on a tray, you have to fight for it and prove you are worthy of it.
First thank them for all they have done for you so far- spend some time doing this
Then tell your fathers people that you need to see your mother for some time to get to know her.
She is your mother. They had theirs so they should not deprive you of theirs. Make it clear that you remain in your fathers family you are just visiting your mum.
If you wish to stay there and you have a better future there then do so, after all it would benefit your fathers family at the end of the day if you have a bright future.
Make them see the positive side of it.
Let them bring all the history they want to bring up- you can politely tell them that those issues were between your parents and you cannot question or judge them. You do not want to take sides either- all you want is to experience the love of a mother. They will respect that. You need to know what to say and how to say it. Do not let the conversation go too far. Explain to them that you are only informing them because you respect them.
They will understand that you are a man and have spoken like a man.

That all is vanity!

Why should the woman be offended about it?
Women carry their child in their womb so they know it is theirs.
t is even for the woman to suggest it if the man is suspecting her.
I would be angry if my husband did it behind my back, that could dent things.
I would prefer he confronts me with it and we get the test done. That is the right way to do it. I would not feel bad because a man cannot control this nagging feeling of doubt. It is human.
Every woman should have had such a converaation with her man about DNA and her stand to it.

Stay away, there is no need to go.
All those people calling, why did not call for the engagment, after the engagment or weeks before the marriage.
As long as she is doing something that is joyful noone can hang on you for not goin.

IF she was bereaved I would advise you to o no matter how bad the issues.

But for the marriage, forget it.

Even it God does it and he would, nothing stops her from adopting a child. It is then one child more. We do Gods will by adopting a child and showing the child love.

A man has to SWALLOW. Rice is just to wash mouth

What next!

The man is being a sadist to her in and out of bed.
She is in a critical situation!

pickabeau1:
Can you explain how you did this practically
Not encouraging but buying dolls

Not encouraging but also not fighting but diplomatically steering subtly against it.

I would not ask him if he wanted a doll but if he wanted one I would ask him to wait till his birthday or some other event, hoping that he would forget about it and wish something else. When he got a bit older like 6 I encouraged him to go for a male doll as well as a female and somewhere along the line it was just male dolls and then it stopped.
He wanted to wear a princess dress, I let him on condition he would take it of. The first day he wore it about an hour, the next time I let him wear it a few minutes and he took it off without protest. After the second time he never asked again. Before that he had been wanting to do it everyday but was afraid his siblings would finish him. The role I had to play here was to get them to let him be on condition that he promised to take it off after some time.

Evina:
Maybe. But I certainly will not encourage what I see as awkward. If a child starts indulging in immorality because he watched adults who weren't discreet, or starts picking stuff not theirs, then I will assume it is a fantasy he has to live right?
Don't be scared of instilling discipline in your children. They will be grateful to you later.

When it comes to stealing etc. The cat turns into a tiger. I am a great believer in discipline and consequences.

Evina:
The adult a child becomes is a function of the training/discipline received or the lack of it. That is why a wise saying goes, "train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it". Character is difficult to change and habits die hard.
If you are an observant parent, you will not be taken by surprise. Your child cannot just become something you don't understand. You must have noticed some subtle signals but out of ignorance, you let it slide.
My colleagues nephew, at the age of 3, started to prefer feminine things. He chose dresses and dolls. The mama beat the love for feminine things out of him and when we tell him that story today, we all just laugh about it.
Those lazy parents excuse their poor parenting skills with, "he has always being that way". If you correct him, he won't turn out that way.

I think that was a wrong approach.
It would have been better for her to let the child play those games and live out his fantasies while also trying to subtly interest him in other things. The problem with not living out your fantasies as a kid is that you take them to adulthood and then start doing it secretly because you have learnt to hide it. That is why most of them take time to out themselves.
I had a child tat was doing it and I let him be , I even bought him dolls. I did not encourage him but I did not stop him, every one thought he would be gay but today he is still a teen and finds girls very attractive and relates to them very well. He is also very humane and I know his wife would be very lucky one day because he is not a Macho type.

I absolutly believe in it especially at a tender age. You can never spoil a child with too much love.

Your friend met the man ten years earlier and felt nothing for him because she also had a childhood sweetheart.
Now ten years later she met the same man, while in the hospital and because the doctor had advised her to get a baby fast, she married him fast.

The problem is that the man was probably in love with that teenage girl he met ten years ago as a young man. His feeling for her was also complexly intertwined with his youth and the young and carefree time. Meeting a woman from the past he felt taken back in time.
Once he got married he suddenly discovered that the dream he had of her then was not the reality that he got.

The woman too could not work on it, because she was not attracted to the man , not ten years ago and not now. The man left so shortly after the wedding and you did not mention why she did not follow him.

She does not arouse the man and cannot join in his fantasy because she is doing it to get pregnant and he has a vivid imagination and wants a partner he can live it out with, while she is frigid.

The man is being secretive because he somehow feels betrayed and used.

So the question is what next?

The woman is looking for trouble. The way to a man`s heart is still through his stomach.
When the man get´s tempted to eat outside she should not complain.
I cook fresh food almost every day for my husband even when I work full time. Sometimes I come home (very rare) and he has cooked . Sometimes he agrees to eat left overs from the day before, but I know he loves fresh food and when everything is already in the fridge it doesn`t take time at all.

aisha2:
So in essence women should keep petting and accepting cheating husbands. Also they should find comfort in the fact that the man too got it from somewhere. Well done

In order words - you know very well that in the north Polygamy is the order of the day. Do you suggest we set up a campaign to get all wives to leave their husbands?
The solution to this problem is very complex and is not just a domestic issue but also socio- political.
I can only say that everyone has to try and take as much care as possible of themselves. If the men are wolves as most women claim, then why throw yourselves into the mouth of the wolf and start crying wolf wolf!

He did the right thing, when you buy a woman she becomes your property and you can treat her how you like. The dowry should be a token.
That is why many poor decent men cannot afford to marry.
As for the girl, strange that extra goats can appease her for the mans behavior.
This is just sale of goods and not a marriage.

aisha2:
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Would love to read Mutter's take on this being that she is an advocate for permanent slavery for women.
I am sure she will bring up a point and have all the meninst salivating and "blessing" her.
This happens a lot in the north. They marry women knowing their status but not informing them, infecting them then dragging them to take ARVs, happened to a loved one. Very sad. Am sure thats the case here hence her reason for suing him. Nothing wrong with a HIV positive spouse getting married but inform your partner so doctors can advice you both on how to live.
In cases like this they just take women and infect them then act like they are doing them a favor. Worse still some wont even take the woman to the hospital but insist on traditional treatment when she falls sick dump her with her parents and marry and infect a new wife.
What this woman has done is brave and bold and set a precedent for other women who are victims of this clown

What do you expect me to write on this. The answer is obvious. The man got it from somewhere too.

My stand remains the same. It is the moral decadence of the society brought about largely by corruption, which has led to poverty, which in it`s turn leads to moral decadence.

However allot of women out there, do not want to settle for a man, they would rather be hopping from one rich married man to the other and that has led to the spread of the decease too.

Please women do not blame the men alone- WHERE THERE IS NO SUPPLY THERE CAN BE NO DEMAND!

- IS IT NOT WOMEN SLEEPING WITH THESE MEN.
-IS IT NOT WOMEN MARRYING AS SECOND WIFE`S.

So why do you want to blame the men. She got her millionaire with complete package.
Do you think that only men in the North are wayward? These days the women are just as active.

That is the strange way of the world. Those friends you help the most turn out to be the most ungrateful even turn back to stab you. That is why one should only do things for heavenly reward.
Your friend was not just POOR MATERIALLY BUT ALSO MENTALLY. He can have all the money in the world but he remains poor in character,and all other things that count.

pickabeau1:
An average guy does not want to raise another mans child
he will even prefer to have her without the child hence the need to be patient in this scenario

He is a special guy and there are quite a few men that would do it when they love a woman. My father married my mum although she has a child and it went very well.
Since her parents are aware of the situation I am sure they would happily give their blessing. Many parents even look to get their daughter married off if she is pregnant.

Poster you should have first greeted us before you started writing other things here!

Greeting is a form of showing respect and acknowledging the other person.
You should insist on your friends showing the utmost respect for your parents. If they do not respect their parents then they also do not respect you.
Anyone who does not greet someone does not have enough regard for that person. Imagine a lecturer or popular musician star where to appear- your friend would struggle to greet him/her.
In the same vein- you do not respect your parents otherwise you would not be asking such a question.
In the good old days we would run to greet our friends parents bending or kneeling and would be so glad to receive a response and a smile for them.
This world is coming to an end.

The man is a very noble man. He is marrying the girl in her condition and is in a hurry to take away the stigma of her being a single mother.
Your friend should go for the marriage, that way it would be easier for the child to be absorbed in the family.
There are so many children born into marriage where the man does not even know he is not the biological father.
I have also seen many cases like this where the family just marry the girl of.
Years to come she would realize that she made the right decision.
A child bearing her own fathers name is not just as easy at it appears. It brings implications with it and one day people would surely remind that child that this is not his home.
Please advice your friend to go for the marriage if she has feeling for the man.

Do the right thing and let him do it.
The wedding is like a ceremony - a transision from father to husband. After the wedding your husband and you become one and form a new family.
Your father might have done you so much wrong but you can`t correct it by doing something to spite him.
Treat him decently even if he does not deserve it. Do it for yourself so you never have regrets years to come.
You just need to bear this one final day.

KanwuliaJara
Bianca has all the class. She always did. The kids were all fantastic, raised by one of the most beautiful and God fearing, loving woman you could ever find. The fact that she married her fathers age mate does not change that.
I want to believe that without her husband she could have even achieved more in life. She was already well known and educated before she met Ojukwu.

I also think that it is very disrespectful to make such rude comments about the wife of a Hero like Ojukwu.
Besides I have always wondered about such venom about Bianca. It is just plain jealousy. Never heard such comments from men.

I kind of knew you would have only cmpliments about Chimamandas husband because he has white blood in him, again goes back to my theory that you have some kind of complex about being black.

Chimamanda`s husband grew up in Enugu even if his father comes from Ikot Ekpene. He speaks Igbo fluently and has the mentality of an Igbo man. He is a doctor but who is very conservative, but also a wonderful person with a great up bringing.
So I think that Example is not appropriate.

Bianca Onoh contrary to what most people might think really loved her husband, she was attracted to his charm and great intelligence. As at the time she married Ojukwu she had a childlike innocence and was not interested in material things. She comes from a good family and had a good education. So she has all the qualities to be an ambassador and deserved the post which was given to her to honor her husband.