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NumberOne2's Posts

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Jokes EtcThree Wishes by NumberOne2(op): 12:37pm On Apr 02, 2015
A woman was out golfing one day, and hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.
The frog said to her," If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."

The woman freed the frog and the frog said, "Thank you, but I forgot to mention that there was a condition to your wishes- that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better."
The woman said," That'll be fine."

For her first wish she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, and that women will flock to him." The woman replied, "That will be okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me." So poof! She becomes the most beautiful woman in the world

For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said," That will make your husband the richest man in the world, and he will be 10 times richer than you." The woman said," That will be okay, because what is mine is his, and what is his is mine…" so, poof! She becomes the richest woman in the world.

The frog then enquired about her third wish, and she answered," I'd like a mild heart attack."
Jokes EtcChelsea Mental Training by NumberOne2(op): 12:20pm On Apr 02, 2015
Jose Mourinho pays a visit to Arsenal, to see if he can pick up any tips on continental training methods. He asks Arsene Wenger how he keeps the players mentally sharp.
"Simple," says Arsene. "I ask them riddles. Let me show you." Just then, Theo Walcot is walking by.
"Theo, I have a question for you," says Arsene. "He is not your brother, but he is your father's son. Who is he?"
"That is easy," says Theo. "It is me."

Mourinho goes back to Chelsea and the next day at training he calls John Terry over. "John, I have a question for you. He is not your brother, but he is your father's son. Who is he?"
"Bleedin' ell, boss, I dunno. Why are you asking me?
"Mourinho explains that it's continental coaching, and gives Terry a couple of hours to think about it.

John Terry decides to go and talk to Cesc Fabregas, since he knows about these continental coaching methods. "Cesc, do you know the answer to this? He is not your brother, but he is your father's son. Who is he?"
"That's easy John. It's me."

John Terry goes back to see Mourinho, full of confidence.
"I know the answer now, boss."
"Go on then, son. He is not your brother, but he is your father's son. Who is he?"
"It's Cesc Fabregas!"

Mourinho rolls his eyes skywards. "No, you idiot! It's Theo Walcot!"
FamilyRe: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by NumberOne2(m): 2:25pm On Mar 28, 2015
Guy, the fact that your family is ASKING your wife to GO means they NEVER supported your Marriage. It also means that your FAMILY has great control over you. SAD [Are you a MAN?]

With that said, you should know that if ANYTHING happens to you, your WIFE and CHILDREN will be treated like SLAVES by your family. Write your WILL and get a good Lawyer.

Its NO LONGER about you.
For the SAKE OF THE CHILDREN, go back to the Genesis of their quarrel and settle it now or else, your children will grow up and will ALWAYS see your Mother (and your own FAMILY) as the WITCHES/WIZARDS behind their problems.

Honestly as a married man, I AM DISSAPOINTED in you. MAN up and control your home and stop playing MR. INNOCENT. What will you tell your kids tomorrow. You are too WEAK. MAN the f*&k UP
WebmastersRe: I by NumberOne2(m): 5:51am On Mar 24, 2015
Getting a domain is NOT the solution. You got BANNED 3 times? This happens when a NEWBIE tries to outwit a HACKER.
STOP clicking on the ads yourself or with friends.
They track those things. Those guys at Google are NOT DUMB.
EducationExam Cheating: Indian Parents Helping Children In Exam Malpractice (pics) by NumberOne2(op): 11:40pm On Mar 20, 2015
New Delhi (CNN)The quest to be educated in India has literally scaled new heights.

Images of parents and family members clambering up school buildings and clinging on window ledges to pass cheat sheets to their children have left authorities in despair.

The incident took place on Wednesday in the state of Bihar, where students were writing their year-end grade 10 examinations.

Examples of cheating incidents are not hard to find in India. But, even compared to previous events, this seems to be unprecedented in its blatancy.

Bihar Education Minister PK Shahi told reporters that children won't learn if they're constantly helped by family members. "Government can only hold fair examinations with the help of the parents, society and the children," he said. "This is a collective responsibility."

In a developing economy like India, education is a precious commodity.

With more than 1.2 billion people, proper schooling could hold the key for much of the population to get out of a vicious cycle of poverty.

The flaws in India's education system are well-documented. The country has a literacy rate of only 74%, compared to 95% in China. Women suffer particularly badly here; only 64% have formal education.

Earlier this year, Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi launched a nationwide campaign urging parents to send their children, especially daughters, to school and properly educate them.

According to the United Nations, India has the largest youth population in the world, with more than a quarter of citizens aged between 10 and 24.


Source: http://edition.cnn.com/2015/03/20/asia/india-cheating-parents-school-tests/index.html

CareerRe: Samuel Oghale Oboh The 76th President Of Royal Architectural Institute Of Canada by NumberOne2(m): 1:06pm On Mar 14, 2015
Ariel20:
Thank God he's not Ibo.. we for no hear word.
How people think. We are talking about a Nigerian making us proud and you just had to go Tribalistic? I'm sure if he was a Muslim you would have said he is a member of BH.
ComputersRe: How To Detect An Hidden Camera In A Room by NumberOne2(m): 12:54pm On Mar 14, 2015
This will probably work for 50% of the time. So if the CAM is behind the Mirror?
EventsRe: How to Achieve the N500,000 Budget Wedding In Nigeria by NumberOne2(m): 12:52pm On Mar 14, 2015
Nice write up but it is NOT complete. How about the Trad? or was that one free? From experience, 900k - 1M should cover both especially if you can do both on the same day.
Car TalkRe: Photos From An Accident Scene In Nicon Junction Abuja Today. by NumberOne2(m): 1:23pm On Mar 13, 2015
Abuja roads are the best in Nigeria. 10 lane express way with little traffic compared to Lagos. So most drivers put the pedal to the metal. I live on Airport road. Daily, you will see cars for NO REASON inside the gutter. On a 10 LANE EXPRESS WAY! How? Also, a lot of drivers don't know how to drive. They just know how to move a car.
I will not be surprised if the car was at fault. I know that junction close to FRSC office. Cars speed out into the express without checking for on coming traffic (which are usually at high speed from the 10 lane express). RIP.
RomanceRe: When A Lady Gives You A Fake 'Green Light' by NumberOne2(m): 12:48am On Mar 10, 2015
"If you're having gal problems I feel bad for you son, I have 99 problems and a gal ain't one" -
ProgrammingRe: How Good Are Nigerian Programmers? by NumberOne2(m): 10:09pm On Mar 05, 2015
Kennyinusa:
I can tell you for free Today that 9 out of 10 Nigeria apps are stupid. It is either the UI is bad or the experience is awful or the technical support is ridiculous.

I have installed virtually every application that has Nigerian origin and i can say that they are mostly crappy.
True but it is NOT a Nigerian thing. 9 out of 10 apps on Google Play or Apple Store are crappy also. Google boast of 1 MILLION apps. Apple boast of 1.3 MILLION apps.
Ok, so how many of these millions have you tried? Surely about 500 or maybe 1,000 or so. You can see that the stats of poor apps IS NOT a Nigerian thing. It is global. How many Indian apps, American, South African or UK apps are of GOOD QUALITY. Very few I can tell you.

PS: Hope I didn't sound rude but My point: Crappy apps are NOT only in Nigeria. Its global.
WebmastersRe: Most Web Developers Are Guilty Of This by NumberOne2(m): 12:36pm On Mar 05, 2015
voltron:
This happens when the customer is a learner and the web developer is Nigerian. Abroad there is a proper business requirements session and a deep scope for the project is established before kick off. We are simply unprofessional about these things and rely on skill instead of proper techniques
You should retract this generic statement especially the part in BOLD. So this doesnt happen in the UK or Ghana or India?
It happens everywhere with UNPROFESSIONAL and/or LAZY developers.
ProgrammingRe: How Good Are Nigerian Programmers? by NumberOne2(m): 12:25pm On Mar 05, 2015
Nigerian Developers are VERY good and are of international standard.
They have apps on INTERNATIONAL app stores like Google Play, Blackberry World and Apple Store.
This means that those apps met INTERNATIONAL requirements before approval on those stores.
ProgrammingRe: Is It Possible To Install JDK On Mobile Phone? by NumberOne2(m): 12:22pm On Mar 05, 2015
If you read the system requirements for JDK, you will know that it is NOT possible.
Get a MINI laptop like HP. Its battery goes like 8 hours
Nairaland GeneralRe: Nigeria Ranked Most Stressed-out Country In The World by NumberOne2(m): 11:53am On Mar 05, 2015
So South Africa has a higher unemployment rate than Nigeria though their GDP is 5 TIMES ours.
They also have a homicide rate that is more than TWICE Nigeria's. Who is the CLOWN that compiled this list?
Christianity EtcRe: Why Is The Name Jesus Not Effective In My Nightmares? by NumberOne2(m):
Smartlife:
I thought about this and I decided to share this.. This is not the first time this is happening.

Just this early morning I had a terreble nightmare about two beautiful women who had something like brown small ball on their head. They were far away and and one of them send me one ball to me. As I was shouting Jesus it seems it's not working. They even become stronger and came closer me in a matter of seconds and was forcing that ball inside I was weak and had a hard time breathing. Had it been not my brothers that hit me. Hmmm I wonder o. They told me I was shouting Jesus but in my dreams it was uneffective.
Did you ever stop to think that the answer to your calling Jesus was your brother waking you up?

You expect extraordinary miracles and fireballs from heaven to consume them? God answers in the little things. That is why most Christians are ungrateful. They didn't get the Million Naira they asked for but they forget that some of their mates are in prison or dead.
ProgrammingRe: Mobile App Developer VS Web Developer VS Software Developer by NumberOne2(m): 10:50am On Feb 23, 2015
Since this is Programming section your title is a bit off
Mobile App Developer VS Web Developer VS Software Developer
Mobile app and Web apps are ALL software. I guess you mean Mobile Apps Dev vs Web Apps Dev vs PC Apps Dev.

I have arrange them in order of revenue & ease of design. PC apps are usally the MOST expensive.

Mobile apps are still evolving. They are light, easy to design and sell (thanks to many app stores around). Device compatibility is the issue (BB, BB10, Android, IOS, Windows). Average selling price is $1.

Web apps are the best. They run on ANY device with a browser & internet connection. (They have been there since Sir Tim Bernes Lee worked on HTTP protocol. They will be around till Jesus comes). Most web apps (including website (like facebook), portals etc) sell at an average of $50.

PC apps are difficult to market and can be VERY expensive (games like PC games and console games inclusive). They are mainly corporate apps. Average price is $200. Eg. Apps like MS Office sell for like $100 - $500.
ProgrammingRe: Meet The First Nigerian To Break iOS History by NumberOne2(m):
Good to know Nigerians are working hard, however, he is NOT the first to develop such an app. He may be the first Nigerian to do "such app" you know off. Only Apple can give us such info.
ProgrammingRe: Nigerian Made Android Apps for Android Phones by NumberOne2(m): 3:30pm On Feb 21, 2015
Check out our over 20 apps catalogue for:

BlackBerry (including BB10): http://appworld.blackberry.com/webstore/vendor/34429/?lang=en&countrycode=NG
Android: https://play.google.com/store/search?q=greenspek
Java: www.greenspek.com/getjar

Check our complete catalogue from our site @ www.greenspek.com/download

NOTE: Screen shots are from 4 different apps

EducationRe: FUTA Students Made To Kneel Down By Lecturer (PICS) by NumberOne2(m): 2:50am On Feb 07, 2015
Glorified secondary school or University? The future is bright
TravelRe: Uae Entry Restriction(s) For Nigerians by NumberOne2(m): 2:42am On Feb 07, 2015
This cant be true... give us a link on UAE MOFA site or...
PoliticsRe: Tribute To Officers And Soldiers That Fought Against Bokoharam But Died In The P by NumberOne2(m): 2:09am On Feb 06, 2015
Those who are of the opinion that Nigeria should divide have NO idea what WAR is.
These are Father, Brothers, Uncles, Sons, Husbands and Soldiers. RIP brave heros. Your labour will NOT be in vain. Maximum respect!
PoliticsRe: Nigerian Presidential Debate. by NumberOne2(m): 11:59pm On Jan 25, 2015
PoliticsRe: Jonathan, Sambo To Spend N4 Billion On Food, Travels In 2015 by NumberOne2(m): 2:11am On Dec 24, 2014
... and the house (Senate and Reps) who are supposed to represent the people will approve it?
ProgrammingRe: Nigerian Made Android Apps for Android Phones by NumberOne2(m): 3:31pm On Dec 03, 2014
We have loads of them. Mostly educational stuff for WAEC and JAMB Past Q and A / CBT to Job Aptitude Tests.
More info @ www.greenspek.com/download
Jobs/VacanciesRe: Test Venues For 2014 NNPC Recruitment Test by NumberOne2(m): 3:14pm On Dec 03, 2014
Some venues seem to have been omitted in that list
WebmastersRe: Web Design Companies In Abuja by NumberOne2(m): 9:39pm On Nov 16, 2014
Check www.greenspek.com
Web design, Mobile app, Consulting and lots more.
ProgrammingRe: What App/Software Will You Love To Have But Can't Afford? by NumberOne2(m): 2:02am On Nov 14, 2014
Whizzdom:
I need Keylogger Software for my computer.
Keylogger for YOUR computer? Really?
PetsRe: Are Dogs Better Companions Than Cats? by NumberOne2(m): 1:05pm On Oct 25, 2014
Bottomline:

Most Dogs sell out easily. They can become your friends in a few seconds. With little or no attention they still come back home. (more Masculine inclinded)

Most Cats need more care and attention to gain their trust. They dont sell out easily like DOgs. Plus they are neater. (more Feminine inclinded)
Tech JobsRe: I Need Someone WHO CAN Write .apk Application by NumberOne2(m): 12:56pm On Oct 25, 2014
Hmmm, an .apk application for android?
Is there an .apk not for android or you just want to form Tech?

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