So your friend or colleague has finally visited your village for one occasion or another...
He/she sees you the next day and jibes you on how impassable your roads are or how generally undeveloped your community appears.
You make excuses and wish the road contract awarded by the government several years ago had been completed.

Naturally, you will feel sad that your community does not compare with those of your friends in terms of good roads and other infrastructures.
Your make a mental note what must have caused the abandonment of the road construction that would have given your area a facelift.
Did the government deceive your people or could the contractor and and those who should be the eye of the government have conspired against your people.

Generally, I do not look down on underdeveloped communities because it is the government that has failed them....
By not spreading development efforts evenly throughout the land or ensuring that projects get completed.

Back to topic proper...
The number of failed/abandoned projects in Nigeria runs into thousands...
Many years ago, a national magazine - I think it was Tell Magazine- devoted an entire edition to "Abandoned Projects."
You will shed tears if you read it..I was able to lay hands on the photocopied version.

Each time a particular contract or project is not completed or is abandoned, the citizens in the affected areas suffer.
So who do blame for that project in your area that was left uncompleted....?
Do you blame the government, contractor, government supervisors, etc?

Five Model Secondary Schools were to be built in my state over 20 years ago, and one of the was to be built in my community.
The design and infrastructure was to excellent and of international standard.
The elders were all happy and gave a huge parcel of land enough for a college of education or polytechnic.
The contractor dug the foundations all over the place and that was the last work on the land.

My community had to task itself through levies and manual labour to see that the school took off though no longer as a model sec. School.
Later, it was gathered that the contractor dabbled into contest of traditional rulership and lost.
And he was not brought to book!

Right now, a particular road contract has survived two governors; the present one is the third.
The road used to be well maintained and swept through regular community effort.
Now, contractor's bulldozers have excavated the road that erosion has taken over and villagers pack their cars some 2 miles away and complete their trip on Okada.

I blame the governor for not putting an eye on a contract he awarded.
Unless of course he is part of the scam....
Some may say he cannot be everywhere, that he is busy and has people who work with him.

But if it takes the governor or the president to visit major contract sites once in a while to make sure money does not go down the drain, so be it.
Which is more difficult: to generate millions of Naira for a project or to pay a visit to a contract site?

How is it in your area?

blueto:
This was why I supported Jonathan's ideology on curbing corruption. He said during his campaign for 2015 presidential election that he would fight corruption with improved technology. That means, blocking the loopholes through which public office holders get illicit access to public funds, thereby preventing graft. These depraved mechanisms by NASS members to earn illicit income would have been a thing of the past.

for example. Under Jonathan, with the support of the World Bank and the IMF to the Federal Government of Nigeria, they helped build an electronic financial management platform-the Government Integrated Financial Management and Information System (GIFMIS), including the Treasury Single Account (TSA) and the Integrated Payroll and Personnel Information System (IPPIS), helping to curtail corruption in the process. As at 31 December 2014, the IPPIS platform for example had eliminated 62,893 ghost workers from the system and saved the Nigerian government about $1.25 billion in the process. But it was unfortunate he was voted out for a selective corruption fighter.

Integrated Electronic Financial Management System is the only thing that will curb corruption.
Such system should include the government revenues and expenditures, and remunerations of public officials and their aides.
It should be adopted by all levels of government.

As long as the bulk of our financial management is on paper and verbal say-so, Nigeria will continue to lose money to those thieves.

I had expected more specific examples relating to the title of the post but the OP spoke in loose general terms.
Here are the things I would consider in my floor plan.

Step-up vs step-down floors:

It used to be the vogue to climb up or down a few steps to access areas of the house.
Even people who had level ground created the steps.
I advise against these because one (especially elders) can trip on them and fall.
Also, they make moving things, eg. furniture and fridge around the house difficult.

Location of the kitchen vs the sitting room:

Do you want your wife to wade through the sitting room to the kitchen with her fresh purchases of veggies, etc?
Or do you prefer she sneak in through some other route without disturbing the proceedings in the sitting room?

Backyard exit::

Recently, I saw a plan in which the architect did not make provision for a door that leads outside at the back.
Say you want to go to the back to start your generator or run away, you don't have to pass through to the front.

Location of the wardrobe vs the bathroom:

With everybody using marbles on bathroom walls these days, this may not matter much.
When the wardrobe shares same wall with the bathroom, the wardrobe gets damp and smelly because the wall soaks up water.
This is more so if the block has more sand than cement.
I experienced this some time in Abuja.

Others may have more to add, but the above examples give an idea of my general drift.

So I have now contributed to the statistic of number of "Views" for this advert.

I was hoping for some exchanges between some rude airport officials and some lady who reused to be intimidated.
Is the bedroom pic part of the airport scene or is the OP same as the object who just wants to be noticed?

Bad breath is a very embarrassing condition.
It has the potential to make the affected person to lose self esteem and shy away from close conversations.

Bad breath is said to come mostly from the mouth, tongue, and throat.
It is due mostly to the sulphur compounds produced by the action of mouth bacteria on food remnants in the mouth.

Dry mouth, spicy foods, poor mouth hygiene, and certain illnesses are causes.
Prevention and/or cure is directed at these causes.

The reference below is very useful:

http://www.therabreath.com/how-to-stop-prevent-bad-breath.html

Hierarchy exists among siblings and so is the attendant respect.
Although your younger brother means well, he has no right to disrespect his elder sister whatsoever.

Bros, lack of time is an unacceptable excuse for failing to live up to your position in the house.
As the eldest, you should have a certain "hold" on your siblings...
But because you are a bit laid-back, it ain't happening.

It appears that your younger sister is the extrovert while your younger brother leans on the conservative side.
If that is the case, conflict will always arise.

You did not mention whether she is in school and how well she is doing..
You should be more concerned if her lifestyle is affecting her academic performance.

The thing to do is to ask your younger brother to show some respect to her sister.
As suggested already, lay the pros and cons of those "unwanted" behaviours before her.
Since she is not independent, you need to know where she is going and give her a timeframe to come back; it is standard practice.

In a nutshell, sit up, bro.

As weird as it may sound, I did the same thing.

I used to work a job that involved a lot of writing.
Averagely, I used up one pen/Biro in 3-4 days.

Just for the fun of it, I began to throw the empties, including branded pens, into a Peak milk carton.
In less than 1 year, the carton was full.

I threw them away when I was relocating.
Regrettably, it didn't occur to me to take pictures.

The importance of this graduate's effort is that we can now forecast how many pens or how much ink a typical uni student uses until graduation.
It is a rare study indeed.

It used to be an issue many years ago for parents, especially the mom, to kick against their daughters marrying outside of the Catholic Church.
I do not know of any Biblical directive in support of it.

Catholics in Africa, especially in rural communities, are very pedantic in issues such as marriage and dressing.

It is totally unfair and wrong for your father not to accept your choice .
People have become wiser and such practice hardly exists now.

Does the Church make marriage decisions for families?
No. We decide and inform them and ask for their blessings
I have relatives who married into or from other denominations.

Please ask your father to provide superior argument why you should sacrifice your happiness on the alter of maintaining a stable Church membership population.
He should resist any reprisals by anybody because he lets you marry your Anglican love.

In a nutshell, your father is afraid of what will happen to him if he gives his consent....
Now you need to allay his fears and convince him that nobody has the right to question who he gives his daughter out in marriage.

If you were my sibling, I will surely take up the matter against our father.

OP, what is it your eldest sister does that made your day wish she were a man?
If you know it, that's your key.

When your dad says "You are not serious," it could mean you are a bit lousy and do not show attitudes that protect, generate and/or increase his wealth.
Fathers see their wealth as the automatic inheritance of their children, but they are not happy if the children are bent on lavishing it.

What do mean by "because of my exposure?"
You call yourself a bad guy and you dad accused you of squandering his money.

Did you lay your hands on his money without permission?

Although your father's wealth belongs to all of you, the inheritance may not be equal, depending on what his Will says.
You need to play the role of Captain in the family, get close or closer to you dad and understudy the business that made him rich...

Unless you have a lucrative job or business of your own, you should be able to manage your father's business should he "quit" tomorrow.

At 18 years, a typical Nigerian boy or girl is not even ready to live alone..
The most important factor is money for personal upkeep and other expenses.

Where will it come from if the child goes to live on his/her own?

In Western countries, one can afford to move out of the family house because jobs are everywhere.
He/she can work while schooling. Some courses can be offered online because the internet works fine and is cheap.

The Nigerian society is different, plus parents are not in a hurry to chase their children away from the house.

Bros, though it's good to have an idea of what one wants in a spouse, but your specs sound like the blueprint of an aircraft part waiting to be machined out.

There is some relationship between love, human chemistry, and spontaneity.
The specs may be present but the other 3 elements may be missing.

Obviously you have female friends and colleagues at work or in social circles that you can "screen" on your own.
The relationship that will follow will be more natural when chemistry, rather than the specs, is right.

Are you incapable of managing his business or what?
Unless he is asking you to manage a business you know nothing about, you should accept it.
Or do you want him to hire somebody else instead?

Sure you have heard about the term "Family Business", meaning all family members and relations work in that company.
You will be in charge, including finances; you will receive salaries and allowances as agreed and everybody is happy.

I know many women who manage their husbands' businesses.
I will prefer my wife to manage my business if I find her capable.
So what's your problem: inexperience or selfishness?

toprealman:
*Some mothers not all

Yes, some mothers.
Though some stubborn mothers actually know their boundaries but choose to cause katakata .

SailorXY:
Nothing new.
Seized forex from citizens remitted by their families & hand them N200/$ but pass the dollars to crooks (relations & friends) to sell back to the masses @ mad rates in the name of floating after hoarding for months.

The thunder that will answer them all will not stop with this generation!

It's true...
The government stopped banks from paying citizens foreign currencies sent to them from overseas.
They pay them paltry "Naira equivalent" and then do with the hard currencies as they wish.

Greed is obviously the main cause of the current Naira dip and inflation.
Yeye people!

I tend to agree with @Seahawk...
If I may ask, is it taboo to push the naming ceremony some 3 to 4 days in the future?

It is important that you or your wife or both of you appear at the wedding.
You did not mention the travel distance.

Bad and bumpy roads is one reason people are skeptical about traveling with an 8 days old baby.
But after they are fed, they sleep off.

If the ride is not long, if your wife wants to go and you are going in a family car, I think it is doable.
Get a female relative to stay with the baby next to the mom.
The likelihood that people will want to carry a sleeping newborn is very minimal. They are not that dumb.

And it does not make you less a man or mean your father-in-law is running your household for you.
The decision is yours but I think you should go.

AZeD1:

Why limit it to the bedroom? Don't tell me you'd have all that space in the house and limit the action to just one corner of the pitch.

Lol...
I mentioned bedroom because it is the common arena ...
And because the seemingly puritan/conservative atmosphere engendered by the presence of the MIL and the kids.

I am aware that next to the bedroom, many people do it in the sitting room.
There you have enough space for rolling and tumbling.
Lol...

If I had money, industrial sewing is one lucrative area I have been eying..
Good venture by the state.

Primary and secondary school wears alone is enough to keep them busy.
Other states should emulate this move.

There is nothing g wrong in a mother visiting her son and his wife in the city, especially for treatment.
But to hang on and think of starting a petty trade is abnormal.
As your husband does not support it, she will go back with time when she is fed up with city life. Most of them do get fed up.

As for asking for a house help, unless you work and are very busy, I think it is too early to want a house help after one child.
Devote your time to your child and family for now.

Unless your mother-in-law volunteers to help, do not ask/bother her.
She sounds aggrieved and is still letting off steam.

Since getting in the good books of MILs has been established as a recipe for an enjoyable marriage, please court her favour.
Any time she complains about her neglect, validate her concerns but make reasonable excuses for your husband....
Viz how her son loves her and talks about her, but things had been a bit difficult for him, etc.

Lastly, be slow to report your MIL to your husband.
While your husband engage your MIL in conversations: marriage in their time, cooking, child discipline, etc.
I sense she is also bored. Let her do the talking mostly.

If you were my sister, this is exactly what I will tell you.

An arrangement where a mother-in-law is living with her son-in-law is not common.
They usually visit for a short period.

However, if you find yourself in the situation you describe, treat her like your mother.
Mothers know their boundaries and when not to interfere.

I don't see how she will interfere in sexual matters; it's between you and your wife in the bedroom.
But that does not mean you should go ultra-conservative and stop acceptable public displays of affection because she is there.

Pleas note that you cannot hide obvious misunderstandings from her...
After keeping quiet for a while, she may one day deem it obligatory to ask questions - as an adult and as a mother.

I hate noisy and long prayers, especially when you are not the only one in the vicinity.
Prayer should not be an excuse to cause discomfort to others.

I had this roommate in the uni who was a nuisance due to his noisy early morning praying.
Sometimes I thought he was actually having convulsions because of all those kakakaka sound.

OP, please tell your wife to pray more solemnly and to the points.

OP mentioned that this woman was of poor financial standing so she needs money.

She is more likely to rely more on breastfeeding and weaning onto home cooked food than NAN, etc.

I strongly suggest you give cash so she can apply it to areas of most need. Remember they have to eat in the house.

Alternatively, you can give your wife a token to buy a few items while you make it up with cash when you get there.

This will be my approach if I were you.

Worn brake pads make a whistling noise when the metal metal wear indicator scrapes your disc/rotor.

Most likely your brake disc/rotor has got uneven surfaces.

The noise come from your pads trying to navigate the uneven surfaces during braking.

All you need is a simple inspection by a mechanic to pinpoint the exact problem.

I had always wanted to do a thread on the need for children to spend more time with their parents while they are still alive.
The need is more so for those who have retired from work or are elderly and living in the village.
For these people, boredom may be a huge problem.

It is not enough to send upkeep money without being seen.
When you breeze in with bread and beverages and breeze out, that's not visiting.
You need to visit your parents at least every major festive period and spend days with them, as work allows.

Same goes for parents-in-laws. Go with family and spend days.
Wife can go alone or with the children if husband cannot make it.

I wish I had spent more time with my parents.
When I did, I ate and drank with them along with other kinsmen.
We shared stories and news about politics, the economy, and other updates.

There was this woman whose son was always reluctant coming home for Christmas...
Village was agog with returnees but her son hadn't come nor sent any message.
She sent a message to her son stating that she was not interested in his rice, onions, and bread...
That she just wanted to see him, cook for him, and rejoice with him like other families.

Do it while you still have the chance.
When they are gone, you will be surprised the huge feeling of "I didn't get enough of them" that will engulf you.
My thoughts though.

Too many kids having access to the Internet!

Isn't that the most convenient position most people drop their keys, phone, etc, for easy reach?

This is one of the reasons I made a case (check my threads)for a "Flag Post" option for readers to flag and delete irrelevant threads.

I still stand by it.

OP did not tell us what the beginning was like so we can begin to trace where/how water take enter pumpkin stem.

I agree totally with ikupakuti .
You need to learn, read about, or study, the psychology of women and how their body responds to situations.

There is hardly any woman that does not like good sex, unless she is sick.
Are you the type that shoots without first getting a strong foothold and then aim?
Women are slow to respond in sexual matters so you need to take time to work on her.

It could be that you are not satisfying her so she employs those excuses to ward you off.
Take her out occasionally, tell stories and jokes, be humorous. Women like these and they make them relax.

Does your wife feel free to express her feelings no matter what?
Ask her what she wants and what you are not doing right.
I am certain she has something to say but feels it may offend you.

Climate change...
Or Gregor Mendel visited your farm..
Lol...

Let me start with a question:

Which should we be more concerned about: inappropriate visual display before kids or the sound emanating from the bedroom?
Given that there are 3 kids in the house, the last being about 6 months, and assuming a generous 2 years spacing, the eldest child is less than 5 years old.
Will this child be able to decode and appreciate the significance of lovemaking bedroom noise to make anyone jittery?
I think not.

I sense that the mother-in-law is the conservative type with similar view of sexual matters:
Hide the sight - not a problem, and subdue the sound.

My verdict is that she erred by interrupting the "Proceedings of the Supreme Bedroom Bullying, sorry, Ruling Council."
I think it falls on the daughter to gently, mildly, jokingly, whatever, caution her mom against future interruption unless it is an emergency.
Of course she knows that the couple "do it" behind closed doors, so what the heck...?

The act is not enough to send her back home before her time, babysitting notwithstanding.

If the kids care enough to ask what the noise was about, mommy can come up with a story, depending on what they heard.
But if they heard " Daddy, you don kill me oo o," " Give it to me, Daddy, pl-e-a-z-e!", e go hard o o to convince them.
Dem go look you some kin' eye.

My concern is not much about the expected depreciation in the value of the car as whether you need a car now.

Lack of a car does not affect your business plus you will soon l travel out so why think of buying one now?

The presence of a baby notwithstanding, you can still get around like many others who do not have cars do.
You should save your money for some other responsibilities.

My approach if I were you anyway.

Peritus:
always changes my "dey" to "dry" and i cannot stop typing in pidgin. The tin tire me.

The wahala is more if you type in Pidgin..
You keep getting the supposed English equivalents and you go delete and retype till u tire.

Ginaz:
Mine is worse, wanna type Rehimat ,a friend's name it went to do oversabi and showed "reheat".

Lol...
Let's say you wanted to give an instruction to "send that oven to Rehimat,"
And you ended up saying "send that oven to reheat."
And there may be f-i-r-e....

Have you ever read the text message you sent only to discover that your phone chose a different word or words thereby altering the meaning of your message?
Well, it has happened to me several times and I have had to resend messages.

This is because we set our phones on intelligent or suggestive mode that suggests and chooses words for us as we type.
Many of the typos on NL posts are due to the above reason.
So before you hit "Send," take time to read through what you have typed or readers will presume meanings for you.

I recently had an amusing Whatsap chat with a lady who feels free with me that made me create this topic.
She sent me the picture of a house and asked for my opinion:

Lady: Do you like this house?

Me: Where did you get the picture?

Lady: From somebody's dp ( meaning desktop publishing, I guess).

We chatted on several issues, but I wanted to know more about the picture...

Me: So who has the dp you sent me?

Lady: Don't understand.

Haba...Which one be she no understand... was she not the one that used "dp" first...
I checked my previous text and saw that my phone replaced "dp" with "do"...
So that my text read "So who has the "do" you sent me?"

I had to explain...
Me: Oh...I meant "dp"...the house picture you sent me..
Don't mind the smart phone. One day it will send "toto" instead of "to."

Her response got me rolling with laughter...
Lady: Or it will sent penis instead of pencil.

Let's have your amusing text message experiences here, people.

My brother's wife uses a 2003 Honda Accord and she says the car is very economical on fuel.
Even when her tank is on yellow, (i.e., reserve) she can still drive to work and back.

Besides, Honda engines are known to go many years.

However, most people think that Hondas have a lot of transmission problems.