₦airaland Forum

Kokedama

Japanese garden techniques are very small and intricate, detailed and yet very simple-looking. It's an artform and we are going to be talking a lot about them. They are useful for small spaces, so it's great for urban dwellers.

Kokedama means Moss ball. It is basically a plant in a ball of soil surrounded by moss. A small garden. It is an indoor installation. You can hang them in a place that gets natural light and watch them grow and flower.

It would look great in offices or a public place.

The Garden Show will be happening at The Palms mall, this Saturday, in Lagos. It's a fusion of Floral Arrangement and Fashion and it's free to attend.

https://www.bellanaija.com/2016/07/it-will-rain-petals-on-the-runway-at-the-the-garden-show-2016-come-see-lanre-da-silva-ajayi-lisa-folawiyo-tokyo-james-aralia-by-nature-more-this-weekend-july-15th-17th/

esof1:
Good morning senior mummies. Pls don't read and pass.
Pls how many ml of water shud I give my ds? He's 15days old and on formula. He takes 1 scoop (30ml) of formula. He feeds up to 6 times in 24hrs.
Ps: my bm refused to come out. I've used breast pump, I've drank all d pap and tea in benin, yet, all I get is few drops of bm.
Cc: kaffy4bill, zaynie, Onegai, Fortius, babythug, Liftedhands and all sabi mamas.

Sometimes BM doesn't come. It's okay. You could keep trying to nurse the baby but please feed him with formula. Feed on demand, if he cries, give him food. Use the guide given at the back of the tin of formula to mix it.

mitchyy:
Mamas pls i have some questions o.

- What brand of breast pump do you recommend? The one that wont hurt my nipples. I'm thinking of getting Tomme Tippee manual pump. I want sth not more than 9k. If there is anyone way cheaper and effective, the better for me.

- How soon can someone travel by air locally after a c-section? And how soon i can travel by air locally with baby?

- If i'm travelling with baby by air, do i need to carrier? Anyone has any idea what kind of carrier is approved?

Sorry for my plenty questions. Pls senior mamas, help me with answers

Newborns fly well but they usually don't recommend anything less than 2-3 weeks because most doctors don't want you exposing that fragile, low-immunity human to a world of germs so soon. But that is a choice you must make. I think you should call ahead after buying your ticket and ask for a travel bassinet. They usually give first come, first served and I've actually not even seen once used in a Domestic flight here. So call and confirm you can by one. If not, you may be told to buy an extra seat for a carseat. You have to give your baby some sort of liquid when taking off due to the change in pressure (feed it or have the baby suck on something). Or the child will scream in pain and be miserable because their ears are popping. The younger, the easier air travel is. They will sleep as newborns but dance around as toddlers.

The most important thing last: You should ask your doctor to clear you for travel after your surgery. Someone we know had her baby, flew back (domestic) a few days or a week after and died 2 hours after getting home. Stress. My mum got to her place to greet her and the baby and met everyone trying to resuscitate her. She had waited long for that child and rushed home, I don't know why. Her husband cried whilst stuck in traffic trying to reach her. Surgery is not something to mess with.

In this thread, there are enough listed homes and addressed for babies. Please take the child there.

https://www.nairaland.com/83723/address-motherless-babies-home-lagos

To all concerned: don't start contacting the OP privately and OP, don't contact anyone privately on this forum.

Immigration has just busted a case of a woman selling babies across the border.

He's teething and his poop may be a sign of a mild infection from something he ate. You can speak to his doctor about it and try and use a solution of Bleach+Detergent to clean the floors. Now that they are putting everything in their mouths to soothe aching gums, babies pick up infections faster.

reserved111:
All these pals saying: tell her to stop calling you, talk to her wit fatherly voice, block her, be mean wit her and all dat...
No matter what she deserve my respect besides I'm smone that treat children wit respect even kids of 4 years, I can't beat a child rather I talk to them wit d same respect as I talk to adults. You don't need to Snub a child if u want to get best result.
Besides I never said dis young gal is sort of rag dat u just need a way to dispose. She is a very pretty and intelligent young woman dat every man will want to keep if she were to be of age or wen she get to ripe age. Advice I seek is hw to make her remove adult kind of feelings till she get to d bridge.

mah niggah

Please just chill one more year and shine the Congo very well. Be honest with yourself and remember it is a crime.

Maybe her mum is hoping you will put a ring on it and you are hoping to chop and clean mouth. Remember the hunter ends up one day as the hunted. Don't come here and ask us how to get rid of her once her belly starts swelling o. So many guys have trod this path you take and ended up married or supporting children outside wedlock.

Shouldn't there be a check about the Safety standards of the park and shut it down until it is seen that the accident was an unpreventable one?

Wait, do we even have any Health and Safety Board in Nigeria? So many people are starting Amusement parks without the basics: good technical support (not some mechanics using 2nd hand parts to replace broken parts), a Rescue team (a lot of people die here because no help in the first 30 minutes after accident), trained A&E staff and a body to constantly monitor them.

Where is the official response of Oakland Park's management?

Modified because I just realised I wasted my time and MB on a thread that was jobless

tearoses:
In addition you may want to consider investments in property
Generally speaking property's tend to double in price in about 12 years
Plus you have the rental income guaranteed on a monthly basis if you purchase the right type of property's in the right area.
But its not for everyone so only do it if you have nerves of steel.

Tell the family not to worry too much, they sound like very hands on and very interested in their kids, so their kids already have a head start.

Onegai, same applys to you. I was on this airbuk site recently and holiday apartments in Lagos are going for about £60k a night. I see a market there.

NAijababe eku ojo meta o

Dokita thorpido if you dont mind what do you specialise in?

I didn't know AirBnB/airbuk had locations for Lagos. That's not a bad idea, we live in a service apartment with good access to supermarkets and funspots. If we are travelling, we can let it out for 2 weeks. Not bad o if Himself will agree.

Property in Lagos is really overpriced, but I'm hoping prices fall as the economy slows down and maybe we can take advantage of getting something to rent out. I'd rather us get a block of apartments and have income coming in, before buying a plot of land to build our place. But let us pray and see. Baby E, strangely, is a co-landlady (Grandparents are the worst )

Jahblessme, for some weird reason my family in the U.K. are sorta...weird. They actually avoid areas with a high Nigerian population. One feels that sometimes the issues within the community may overwhelm him. Like a cousin who was attending a Nigerian church there and so much drama was going on with dating and business and stuff and they will carry their wahala and relocate to Nigeria.

EfemenaXY, can you do a thread on financial matters for the family? Do you have enough info for a country like Nigeria? There are no Independent Financial Advisers here and most of the bank staff don't know much.

cococandy:
If you want to escape jury duty, can you use a new baby as excuse?
Anybody know?

I don't have strength for this at all. Besides using my baby as excuse won't be a lie. It will truly be inconvenient for me.

Oooh jury duty! You should go, it may be an interesting case.

Tell them you're exclusively breastfeeding and the change in rhythm will upset the feeding patterns of Baby. Maybe speak to your paed about writing you something?

How's your daughter doing

codemaniacs:
If u know how rich Nigeria is.. U won't be saying this..

I, frankly, in all honesty, do not give a shi.t how rich Nigeria is. Did you sleep with electricity all night long last night? Are your roads flooded because they are poorly constructed and need to be fixed? Are your General Hospitals lacking even clean public toilets and Hand Sanitisers?

If all that is true, then Nigeria is a poor country.

But how is that pride of yours, hope it makes through the flooding and bad traffic this morning and helps your iron your short with no light

That £100mil would have at last transformed out Education sector, so that one wouldn't wonder if those replying him (who are all most likely "graduates" ) would at least be able to reply him like people who learned the official language of their country: English is the national language of Nigeria, you know.

That £100mil could have given a transformer to this guy in a tertiary university: https://www.nairaland.com/3217893/how-iron-clothes-ogwashi-uku

The same people insulting him are wondering how to cross the desert and swim to Europe or travel to the U.S. on a tourist visa and find a elderly person to marry.

But yeah, let's defend our pride!

Xionez:
Mehn, twice a week?!!!
She is not feeling it any more. The lady seems stressed out. STRESSED OUT!!!

Try and take her out, to the pool side, beach, holiday...anywhere. Just find a way of making her relaxed every weekends. Boost it with a few surprises like cooked dinner or takeaways from posh restaurants and eateries on weekdays. Load up on the ice cream with additional purchase of her favorite genre of movies. It seems to calm women down. A good laugh or an emotional cry is enough to make her feel relaxed.

Forget about your sexual needs a bit. She definitely would LET YOU KNOW if you play your cards right.

Buttttt, If you don't mind making love to a plank of wood, choose Thursdays and Sundays.
On Thursdays, she may be very tired due to work so there is every guarantee she would be very stiff. The thought of the work waiting for her on Monday would equally make her very stiff on Sundays
Happy Planking!

TIP: While she is bawling her eyes out from the emotional film/having a laugh, have your bath and smell fresh. She would like to hug or be close to someone (YOU!!!) at the end. And that someone shouldn't have BODY ODOUR of any sort. Let her lead you, don't force it. It will surely come.

I'm married. And I approve this statement.

Some people are just so unrealistic. The rent is due, but because of the new economic dispensation, your company pays you every other month. So you're lying in bed thinking of how you will do the unpleasant task of approaching some relative or friend for a loan. Wifey turns to you and says apologetically "please we need to figure out how to pay for summer school as we cannot leave the children at home". Then the gen splutters because you bought you are out of fuel and mosquitoes start singing in your ears. And by the way, you have to be up at 5am to go to work.

What I described is the normal lifestyle of a typical couple residing in a city in Nigeria. If this is the normal lifestyle, whom are the couples having incredible feats of passion 2 times a night or even every night??

OP, take the twice a week schedule and ensure you perform like a Single Young Man trying to impress a new lady. Also support her with chores and kids, share your issues with her and always ask about hers. Na she go chase you soon.

ahnie:
The last i tried this...my daughter was 5months old i stationed the dog there to scare her from crawling to the electronics and she personally, singlehandedly and by herself gave the Dog the beating of his life that i had to rescue the dog from her grip. before she keels the dog.

Poor doggie

Glover road Suya doesn't blow me away o. It's nice but I can't say it's the best I've ever had.

The best suya is still the N1sticks from Ikoyi club and LUTH. They tasted of Childhood, Freedom and Happiness

Suya+Chapman drink=Taste the Rainbow

claremont:
This is a tandem jump, try a solo jump to get a proper Adrenaline rush.

Solo jumps are for people who have trained and logged some hours before jumping. I wanted to do a tandem jump since! Maybe I'll vex and do it December...

EgunMogaji:
Okay, thanks.

https://www.nairaland.com/2894705/hibiscus-flower-society-calling-all

There is a poster on this thread, called Gloriouspa, whom is a gardener based in Ibadan.

OP, thanks for inviting me here. Well done.

There is a simple solution to all this stories: make the helps wear a uniform.

It's done quite often where I stay (Lagos). The uniform looks like something auxiliary nurses wear and comes in small, medium or big. A tunic and trousers, usually white and blue. You can buy them online or sew them. The help wears them and only takes it off when she is in her private quarters/room after work has closed for the day. So no more accusations of shabby-looking maids or accusations of maids dressing sexily or whatever the case. Maybe on Sundays to church, the help can wear something that she owns to church. 3 pairs should be enough and she can wash them during the week (so no excuses to "I no get cloth" ).

Explorers, keep posting

The U.S. is different. Yes, the school you go to matters, it the university you attend is the big player. Some schools are catchment areas for certain industries. In terms of the future of those kids, most will run the economy (companies, businesses, industries) but won't end up in Politics. Simply because Americans dislike people who look like they got life better than them. People disliked Bush II for that reason, even though he wasn't exactly the sharpest axe in the shed. Of course they love their old money but it's not revered the way an Englishman will ask you if your grandfather attended Eton. To be President in the U.S. you will get more votes if you tell them about washing cars or waiting tables during Summer hols than if you mention "I went to Duke, George Washington, Columbia, Harvard". They mistrust overly smart people. Bill Clinton went on Arsenio Hall's show, played the sax and got almost every single Black and Minority vote. Hillary Clinton can't get that group to trust her, so she's appealing to educated females and educated men. If it were any other candidate for the Dems, Trump would never have gotten this far as a opponent.

damiso:
Kai see calculation

And they say its only women that scheme.

It's when they start denying it that it gets funny. I know someone whom that is what his clique members/awon boys do. 3 have been successful so far. And it always plays out in the same way.

Guy: "where do you stay?"
Babe: "Ikoyi, around Bourdillon, with my dad/Banana Island with my mum/Nicon town in the family house"

Gbam! He will call you back that night, no collecting your number and disappearing, no mago mago. Expect a 2nd date soon. The next day most likely.

Guy: "where do I drop you off"
Babe: "I live in Lekki 1"
Guy (soft smile): "really, I've got some friends there. Where?"
Babe: "Fola Osibo, in a self-contained BQ"

He will follow you home, bring his condom, but leave any thought of an engagement ring behind and spend the next 8 months "wondering" if you are The One (to your chagrin).

Guy: "where do I direct the taxi to take you to?"
Babe: "Festac/Iyana Ipaja/Egbeda/Fadeyi"
Guy: "wow, that's really far o"

Translation: "wow, that's really far, your father better be the owner of Chisco or Young Shall Grow or be a Customs controller of a Port somewhere because I ain't driving that far for nurring. Geh, ah don't do bridges"

If na lie I talk, make I fall for gutter

cococandy:
That's what I thought at first but then you have to factor the minimum wage in Nigeria which is 18,000 and then you see it's expensive by Nigerian standards.

If I was to send my kid from here to school at home, I wouldn't consider it expensive because when you make the money in dollars and convert it to naira, it doesn't bite as much. Say $4K a year going by the current exchange rates. That's a real steal.

But For a Nigerian being paid in naira, it's expensive.

Even subsidised schooling in Lagos can't be covered by that minim wage. One taxi man told me his boys had to pay N5000 for something about their result and the next term. I think it was some new scratchcard. And that was a school in Ilasamaja

thorpido:
The trophy wives who are probably going to groom their daughters to aspire for the 'prize' too.That man must have looked at you like,'you got it'.

But of course! Do you know how many people that their parents tell them "don't bring home a nonetity"? Or those that teach their daughters from childhood who is an acceptable boyfriend or not. They are so plenty. Those trophy wives will screen their kids' friends down to the last. Even amongst big guys, if they are your mentor they will help you select a bride that will place your feet higher. I heard a tale of some popular Businessman who had a PA he liked. When one of his billionaire friends brought his daughter home, he pushed his PA at her. The PA refused and said "I have a gf of about 3 years, you know her, blah blah". His boss replied him "there are a million pretty girls like that once you make your fortune, but your wife is an investment into your future". And that was that. It is soooo common that it is funnier to see people denying doing it than the actual deed.

thorpido:
@bolded,Kola Abiola wanted to marry Babangida's daughter.I learnt it was Maryam who kicked against it because she didn't want her to be second wife but their relationship was that deep.

Do you know i was about to mention Abiola? Maryam herself is originally from Asaba. You won't see core Northerners like Indimi and Dantata wedding outside their tribes and social group. Like you won't hear an Okoya marrying one of the old Northern families. It's the same across different tribes: the older the money, the more they would rather their daughter/son get someone they know (and I'm speaking from experience). Even in old Yoruba families, though they are not as rigid (but they will show the outsider pepper sha). Even one Ijaw guy that was in an ivy league, one Senator from old money from his side insisted on giving him a huge scholarship and visiting him a lot in school and eventually started bringing his daughter along. His father was totally complicit in the matter.

They groom themselves to marry from their social circle.

tearoses:
Eventually the wheat will be separated from the chaff
The quality of the people in corporate now is really high
So many foreign degrees around. I've stopped counting the number of family members/family friends whose children have come here for their Masters. Yesterday I was at one of my aburos PHD graduation.

You can get in by the back door but can you sustain it?
When you are bringing the whole team down, people will start to talk
When you cant do the job you were employed for, you will be eventually sacked.

One of my aburos told me how in his bank, the managers used to line all up all the back door entry staff on top of the desk every week and tell them that he knows how they all got in and sometimes even names their godfathers and tell them that he will fire them if they didn't pull up their socks.

That's cold mehn but yeah, so many people can now afford a foreign degree, it no longer makes people stand out.

Did you ever hear of that HR guy last year that tweeted asking for CVs from international students only, for a banking job? I met some lady who said her company only hired international or private uni grads because they're more disciplined.

Meanwhile, for all those who like to complain about shabbily-dressed Nannies, relax. At the Graduation Ceremony, most of the Nannies wore uniforms so you certainly knew whom they were.

And enough trophy wives! Mehnnn! I saw one and was like "surely she's not someone's Mummy". Then they called her child and she went forward, with her elderly husband. Himself started laughing when I smiled approvingly at them

EfemenaXY:
I get what you're saying but these examples you've given are of kids from elite classes. Granted I don't know the dynamics of how it works within the Nigerian environment but even then surely private schools back there aren't the exclusive preserve of the super rich with billionaire parents?

So that group aside, how does it work for the middle class / upper middle class kids that go through the private route? I'd like to believe that even at that level, the girls graduating from those schools aspire for high end careers and not become glorified housewives? Otherwise what would have been the essence of sending them to such schools in the first place?

Many of the top end female politicians in palariment went through the private route or grammar schools.

Hmm, the upper middle class girls who attended these schools have more leeway, some work and some don't. But they are still given a cushy landing at their jobs and they run successful businesses. Some get fasttracked to the company's Board of Directors. But yeah, most of them I know, I see them at the gym, at the supermarket, at the right weddings and parties. Not really at the office, slaving away till 9pm like most bankers. Ikoyi club, for example, has a law that says no more maids or Nannies on the premises escorting children. So who will take off work to take Junior and Pretty to Swimming or Tennis lessons? Mummy or Daddy? I mean, that was why Mummy went to N3.5mil per annum school, so she could sit beside Daddy and marry him and not some random dude who can't afford to pay for Ikoyi club membership dues.

It depends on the private school. School on the mainland, N650,000 per annum cannot be compared to school on the island at N8mil per annum. So the sentence "I went to private school in Nigeria" has to be qualified by the name of the school before anyone gets impressed. Private schools have become the new Designer handbag.

tearoses:
I want to believe that there comes a point where companies choose people who are suitable for the job and not just because of your surname, even in Nigeria.

Unfortunately this is not true. I have a friend who didn't make the right contacts during his schooldays, even though he went to a prestigious University abroad. He couldn't get to the interview stage for any oil and gas firm in Nigeria. The day he met my friends and realised that even though they worked in O&G, almost all of them hadn't bothered to get even a Masters from anywhere, he nearly wept. I mean, one of them did Industrial Training at a desk, got posted to NYSC at the same desk and afterwards resumed full time work at the exact same spot. Another used his contacts to get a plum job at an oil coy, even though he had an extra year and finished with a 2-2. Ask any Nigerian student, they will tell you that you cannot even attend an interview at an oil coy with those issues, yet I had classmates who are successfully planted there. All their contacts and networking came from Family and School. And there was my friend, jobless, with his pretty degree.

Tearoses, what you've said is absolutely spot-on. It depends also on the parent. At that Graduation Ceremony, the best student (a girl) also won several prizes for subjects. Parents rushed to congratulate her parents and asked for the contact info of their lesson teacher(s), So they could hire them for their own kids and see results. They were all surprised to find out that the girl had no lesson teachers. Those parents were still looking to outsource their roles as parents, thinking that throwing a bucket of money at the problem for results, rather than their presence.

As per the Otedola girls not working, I'm not shocked at it. Okoya's daughter got married and everyone congratulated the dude wedding her and were surprised to find out she was jobhunting. No-one would really hire her either because she's an Okoya (and Daddy may have pissed them off in the past) or, she was NOT expected to work in Corporate. Rarely do I see the daughters of wealthy people working in the Corporate world after Marriage. They are expected to be Gracious Chateleines to their husbands and run the home and his social calendar, not be CEOs. It's actually uncommon. They can afford to be socialites and be SaHMs so no-one expects them to be hustling a 9-5 that is demanding. Even the one i knew who has an MBa, her Dad bypassed her to pick his son who's younger than her and doesn't have that qualification to run the company. Zahra Buhari is going to run a charity one day, not an oil company. And they will be expected to marry well, and help Daddy forge alliances with the right family. Which is why, no matter how devout or comfy a Yoruba Muslim is, he cannot aspire to wed a Hausa-Fulani girl from a wealthy home. She's been promised to someone else.

EfemenaXY:
I totally get where you're coming from but at the end of the day, it really depends on what you (and dad) want for Baby E. The key thing is ensuring you get the right balance of academic tuition versus pastoral care. Some schools are more academically inclined while other tilt more towards pastoral care / sports, or others offer both at a 50:50 ratio. It really depends on your child's capability and what you as their parent feels is priority.

One of the advantages of going private are the smaller class sizes. Take here for example, the average class size is 30 pupils per class (with 1 teacher and 1 Teaching Assistant {TA}) in the state school. But when you go private you get an average of 8 - 12 pupils per class. So the kids get a closer 1-to-1 attention from the teacher and the class size is more manageable.

Additionally, unlike their state school counterparts, each teacher has got the required university qualifications and experience to teach their precise subject. So you don't get instances of 1 teacher handling mathematics, English Language, French, Fine Art, Music, Spanish, etc.

I can't quite remember the exact statics but there was a report a few years ago detailing the percentage of private school pupils in the country and the percentage of those from that background bagging the top jobs. I think it stated 6% of the entire population were private educated kids but yet 95% of those top most jobs were taken up by those who went through the private route.

Onegai, put baby E in on one of them jare. Don't worry about that white riding helmet you mentioned or her getting to marry Prince George...you never know it just might happen but you've gotta start right na, abi?

It's true sha about that statistic of 6% in the right schools and 90% of those kids end up running the country. And Kate Middleton will definitely be screening girls carefully for Prince George (people who clawed and climbed their way up the social ladder are very touchy about letting others get there as well ). So we really have to start right, sigh

If no-one sees me on NL, it's because we are paying schoolfees and I can't afford to pay for data on my phone Princess Baby E, Duchess of blah blah, has to happen.