₦airaland Forum

There is one lady they should come and investigate around Oando-Jakande stretch of Lekki-Ajah expressway. She has had twins in her care for 2 years now and they never seem to grow past a certain age (of about 7 months, they can sit up). When she first started, they were sitting down. 2 years later, they still are babies.

Submit the cv. That's all, don't do more than that. Don't even mention to the HR people you know her, simply pass it on. That is all you owe anyone. If they ask, tell them you sent it off and she will have to be patient and wait for a call, like any other candidate. You have no power over whom your company hires.
You won't be the first in this situation and everyone else who decided to play charitable Christian and forgive with open arms ended up regretting it. People rarely change and people rarely feel ashamed. Shame is an emotion that makes them feel uncomfortable, so you best believe they won't indulge it on your behalf. Infact, they feel you ought to be grateful you were in their house and met that man. In their minds, they "made" you.

enkaydewdrop:
Good morning mamas and Happy new month...
Please, I'm sorry this question is coming late.

My bubba's 6 week immunisation is this morning, and I heard it's advisable to administer paracetamol before getting it done.

Please, how long before the immunisation and what quantity do I administer?

We didn't give any pain relieving meds before. She only took twice in her entire one year schedule of Immunisation. Professional Injection taker! I was told not to give her unless she ran a fever and she only did the first time (immunisation made her sleepy). Weirdly, we cry endlessly over taking oral immunisation. She hates swallowing stuff. She cries more from the shocl of the needle and by the time we are leaving the hospital had stopped shedding tears.

enkaydewdrop:
Good morning mamas and Happy new month...
Please, I'm sorry this question is coming late.

My bubba's 6 week immunisation is this morning, and I heard it's advisable to administer paracetamol before getting it done.

Please, how long before the immunisation and what quantity do I administer?

Cc zaynie, mitchyy, AlphaHandMaiden, helovesme, babythug, Fortius, ozycy, ahnie, Liftedhands and every sabi mama...


Cutie999, I see you sis...
Kiss baby for me...

We didn't give any pain relieving meds before. She only took twice in her entire one month schedule of Immunisation. Professional Injection taker! I was told in the U.S. not to give her unless she ran a fever and she only did the first time (it made her sleepy). Weirdly, we cry endlessly over taking oral immunisation. She hates swallowing stuff.

DBestDoc:
The theatre nurse didn't do his/her job well.
He was supposed to take record of every single surgical instruments, guazes/towels used for the operation and he failed.

It's his job to count and recount them to make sure he got them all back before the patient is closed up...

The only mistake those Doctors made was failing to double check and ask, unfortunately it cost the patient his life.

Food don don for people who know nothing about how an operating room is being run or organized, they will start shouting quacks . The real culprit here is the Nurse, but as usual the Doctor is charged for every mistake that goes on under his watch.

RIP to the dead.

Well, if you say you are at the top of the medical profession, you have to also be willing to take the largest responsibility. Because it happened under his watch, so he's to blame. I am responsible for my workers doing the wrong thing.

sapiosexual1:
Agreed, a mistake is a mistake, esp when it costs a life however many of us should note that the towel being mentioned of here is a small piece of cloth(gauze), small enough that it could be hidden by a clenched fist.
Matters arising : If they really did forget the gauze in the patient, why would they plead 'not guilty' instead of admitting to their error.
They're more questions than answers in this matter, surely the press appears biased in this case

Everyone charged to court in Nigeria pleads "not guilty", even the paedophiles. Just check any thread. I think it's what their lawyers advise them. For this case to be charged to court, there must have been an autopsy so there seems to be enough evidence. Several malpractice suits have been settled out of court and not being carried in the newspapers. I know this because I know lawyers who handled the different cases and won because the hospital had too much to lose.

KanwuliaExtra:
When it was "sweeting" the "2 both of you", you did not think of the possibility of pregnancy?
Stop PHOCKING. Period!
You go born TRIPLETS next I swear.
Nothing as poisonous as the AKAMU of a JOBLESS MAN.

But this is horrifyingly true o. If they do a statistic of children born in multiple births and correlate it to their parents' financial standing, there is a big chance it will show that the lower the income, the higher the chance of having multiple births naturally, without Scientific intervention. Even in countries: the richer the country, the lower the birthrate, poorer countries will be conceiving triplets naturally, anyhow. Or to quote my evuls sister "shey you want twins, ehnn tell Himself to quit his job and become a driver or labourer. You will deliver triplets sef "

My language is struggling to survive. It will disappear in 2 generations or be absorbed into a bigger entity if we are not careful. I've started speaking the little I know to my baby and to my delight, I have found it has similarities to my husband's language. He can't speak his but I've resolved to hire a teacher for our children in when they're older. Us minority languages have to fight even harder. I've seen books and CDs in the major Nigerian languages sold for kids.

Donald3d:
talking to me ma'am ?

No dear, I'm was speaking to Kris.

jaybee3:
Why should a man with a job marry a liability?

Dynamics of the world with respect to earnings and expenditure as changed so it's the norm that couples contribute to the success of the family.


The pastor goofed with the message even though his intention had to do with importance of finance in marriages. Expect his gullible followers to start demanding heaven and earth when clearly there isn't a lot of eligible bachelors to choose from

Pastor Adeboye's view is too simplistic. Anyone can pray for an hour, cook and hold down a job. That doesn't make them fit for marriage. Finances actually tend to destroy marriage more than domestic skills, so I wonder why we keep harping on the latter as the be-all and end-all to a good marriage. And as for men expecting their wives to contribute financially to the success of the family, very true. Women should also expect men to contribute domestically to the success of the family. If I'm working fulltime, giving my kids the best of my talents as a mother, I will be too exhausted to be the world's greatest wife, because I'm a human being and I'm allowed to get tired. So my husband should step up and share that burden, same as we share the financial burden. Because things have changed, most of us grew up with an extended family unit as kids so our parents didn't hire maids but now we are very much a nuclear unit in our society.

Chepy1:
Baba, I know my sis, she doesn't always make good decisions.....But I'll find out about the guy sha

Take the car away from her temporarily, under the pretext of fixing it. Sit her down and gist with her: share some of your romantic escapades, bring up some of your friends and tell her about some you read on NL. Infact, let me give you 2 stories that come to mind:

A girl had a thread where she was dating some guy who used to live off her financially. It got so bad that the loser even asked her to give him the N50k her dad have her to buy a laptop for school, so he could further his (non-existent) music career. He kept trying to make her feel guilty (she added screengrabs of their convo).

Someone mentioned how a girl was dating a guy and he took her car and drove it around whilst she took public transport. He refused to return it after they broke up and he had an accident and destroyed the car. He sent her back the wreck and moved on to the next available mugu.

Work those stories casually into your conversation. Tell her that unfortunately there are digusting people who prey on men and women for financial comfort. Tell her that when any situation looks bad, people involved are not honest with themselves and see themselves as the exceptions, rather than the rules. Remind her gently that an honest man may need her support from time to time but he will never make her uncomfortable so he can sit down in comfort. That you are her brother and a man and you got her a car to make her comfy. Gently mention that an honest man will have no qualms introducing himself to her brother as her bobo.

Leave the conversation at that and listen to what she says. Keep the car for 3 months and cut down her allowance (tell her things are tight). That should get rid of anybody scrounging off her.

You may think it is a long method but i have come to appreciate the fact that we humans don't always like the truth giving to us bluntly and head-on. We will scream and fight to defend our point of view. But a careful and gentle nudge in the right direction will work wonders much better.

tyconcepts:
My 9months old son is a natural 'chopper' but after recovering from malaria like a week ago, his eating focus shifted from his pap & milk to strictly adult food like Eba, Rice, Beans, Noodles e.t.c Before the malaria he eats adult food + 330ml of pap to step down.... Now he won't even taste the pap at all and am confused on ways to make him keep taking milk. I still breastfeed him but my not lactating properly makes me feel the breast milk isn't sufficient for him. I have tried introducing other cereals like Nutrilac & Cerelac....He doesn't like sweet things at all (That's how he has been).

How do I get him to take milk....I want to make sure he takes milk everyday?? Also do kids grow to like sweet things?? He won't even take Capri-sonne

One of my nephews is 8 years old and he doesn't like or ever want cake. No matter the quantity or quality, he simply is not a sweet tooth. Some of my other nephews and nieces don't eat white bread and prefer weetabix or wheat bread. Baby E prefers fruits to Cerelac amd won't drink milk by itself. Sometimes, kids like what they like. Try making scrambled eggs, add milk, ginger and garlic and spring onions or onions to it.

Abagworo:
Everything you wrote have they not been repeatedly tried ? Beyond politics you can enquire if indeed those things are not already there. This idea is good IMHO as long as the salaries are not yet slashed. It only proves the workers are irrelevant in running the affairs of the State but were just attached to create false sense of employment either by this Government or the past ones.

They have not been tried. I've worked for a state government before to know that the amount of lipservice paid to what the reality on ground is, is huge. If course they are going to slash salaries, even a blind man can see that coming.

Hello, I can't access my email or send you a pm. What's up?

Abagworo:
What is bad about this policy?

What they need is commercial agriculture, large scale farming to produce crops that are viable in the markets of Nigeria and Africa. So they can generate revenue for the state to fix those appalling roads or is Rochas planning on having people pay taxes via tubers of yams? People in the villages are not starving, they are surrounded by farmlands. They don't have money to do other things like access quality education, good healthcare and start manufacturing businesses. Farms in schools should be geared towards research, they can sell that research to companies (that is what is done in working countries). This governor is codedly trying to slash salaries. He should reduce his workforce in the civil service and offer them mechanized farming apparatus with the little money he has, reduce political appointees and aides and take a pay cut himself and the deputy governor and every single commissioner. Offer tax incentives to anyone with a viable manufacturing proposal (he has the manpower) and fix his roads partially.

Why is it that no governor is speaking of reducing aides and slashing their own salaries and those of political appointees ?

Great news! Kudos to GEJ for implementing and Buhari for seeing it through. Governance should be a continuum. So, where can one purchase this in Lagos?

I wonder how expensive this list is now. The economy has certainly taken a nosedive and prices have skyrocketed. I'm glad I'm not buying some things now because they would be pricey.

Karbridals, you wanted us to tell you he was a bad guy. Most of us did. EfemenaXY merely said the other side of the coin: you also had some issues. She's not lying about what she said: you carried this relationship on your head very strongly, for someone you knew little about. Nothing wrong with an online relationship, but something wrong with an online relationship taken too seriously, with no footing.

If someone tells you he/she will give you something and they don't, if they are not your immediate, understanding and loving sibling, and whatever they are giving you is not a textbook or something you need to save your life, please don't remind them. It reeks of low-class desperation.

And if someone doesn't return my calls, if it is not my mother, I don't keep calling. I learnt this and you should too. There is nothing, absolutely nothing in this world stopping anyone who wants to contact you or keep in contact with you, doing so. Think I'm lying? Proof: if his phone got stolen, he has memorized important numbers to call them, they are on his Facebook so he can message them and tell them. Did he do that for you? Why didn't he? No, don't tell yourself he was angry, that's a lie. We both know the truth.

And when Efemena said you hadn't gotten over your last relationship, she probably meant that whatever happened there influenced how you handled other relationships (including this one). And the amount of time between doesn't mean much if not spent well. It's the most common thing in the world to see a man or woman clinging in his/her next relationship if in her previous one, she may have felt let down by how it ended. Maybe she was dumped, maybe the last guy disappeared, maybe she got cheated on, maybe she did the breaking up and the dude went on to marry the next girl he met and gosh, their pictures online look happy and beautiful. Whatever the reason, your self-esteem took a hit and you wanted to fix it by having another relationship. It's not a bad thing, just a common mistake made by people dating. So just try and heal yourself and know you're better than this.

Karbridals, that man was not into you. From the start. Oh, yeah, when you guys started, he was all over you because new toys are interesting to small boys. But his interest waned and he moved on. You didn't do anything wrong so it would be damaging for you to blame yourself for his lack of serious interest. Please move on. Remember this, several men have found good relationships without having to "test" anyone through silly mindgames. Once anyone starts disappearing and not picking calls, assume it's because he has found a new toy. If he ever tries to come back, please don't let him.

oriaburefarms:
For now 1kg is ok. Most importantly I needed to know that I can find it in Nigeria. Can u pass the company contact and location? Thank you

Hmm, 1kg is pretty small for the 2 companies I know who produce fertiliser. I can't pass on their contact info but I'll ask them for whom you can meet to buy retail.

OP, if I greeted my husband on one knee as a model dressed as a Native American Indian, he'd be confused. He would probably ask "first of all, why did you drag me to a forest in the middle of the night and why are you dressed like that?"

Please put up a picture of what you're offering. And mention a few brands so we have an assurance that all products are genuine. Thanks.

ahnie:
Please give me back my baby's slice .
She was just saying...but i want to JUST eat it AND PUT THE EGG INSIDE .

I WAS stoneface...mehn i jejely retrieved my baby's slice from her.

Omo coman see bony.she was just carrying her face upandan.she even xtended it to zino.she refuse to carry zino.

Imagine a 53yrs old woman behaving so.she wee bee eating children food.
Infact if she sees any staff eating...her WI-FI longer throat wee bee in your food and she must beg you to share food to her.

But this is bad o. Pikin food. And they can tell the parent "baby usually finishes the food" and you will be in your ignorance happy.

Silvofitz:
Atimes it's good to withhold comments, especially when one is ignorant of the subject matter. We read your comment aloud in the hospital here, and people have been cracking their ribs. It obviously shows you know next to nothing about Medicare, and I advise you keep your mouth shut, and stop making yourself a laughing stock.
All the interpretations you gave to LUTH Press Release are warped.

This is what it means:

1. She's an old patient who came with another ailment means, she's a regular or known patient of the hospital who had been coming for certain treatments; but this time around she came with another complain of abdominal swelling. So, being an old patient does not mean she had been coming overtime and they have not been able to diagnose what's wrong with her.

2. That her family requested to fly her abroad does not mean her condition was wrongly diagnosed. LUTH is a tertiary institution. Most patients who come in are either referred from another secondary hospital or have been treated in another hospital, and might have undergone some laboratory investigations in those hospitals. And she might have been told she had cancer. But usually LUTH would insist on doing its own investigations to be pretty sure. The family might feel they already knew what was wrong with the patient, and hence requested to fly her abroad. This does not suggest incompetence on the part of LUTH. Patients have the right to request to be discharge from the hospital at any stage of their treatment, even against medical advice. That's why DAMA (Discharge Against Medical Advice) form is available in the hospitals. The patient or the informant would be asked to fill the form before such discharge is granted.
The patient in question had not even spent 48 hours in LUTH. Some of you come to the hospital, and tell doctor you have typhoid, and you expect him to commence treatment straightaway. Only quacks in chemist or drugstores do that.

3. That LUTH doctors are quacks is laughable!
It's obvious some of you out there don't even know what quack means.
No quack can work in LUTH or any teaching hospital.
Funny enough, when you even travel to abroad for treatment, you might be surprised that it's Nigeria-trained doctors who would attend to you.

4. If LUTH had not arrived at any diagnosis, and had not in any way indicated that the condition was life-threatening, i wonder why the hush hush for overseas treatment. I also wonder where the referral letter to overseas emanated from. This makes the whole issue suspicious.

I think the referral letter came from one of the hospitals who diagnosed the cancer. Though I'm confused: I thought I read a report that her sister said it was 3 consultants who studied her case and eventually started suspecting cancer and that happened at LUTH. But she's not been there long enough. I'm rather confused now. I believe what happened was that some medical person from one of the hospitals she went to, saw the online social media financial drive and contacted the people organising it that her case was actually very bad and probably not operable. So those organisers then felt the family was trying to scam the public by raising money for a case that was not going to end well, most likely. The public erred because they read the initial broadcast, didn't understand she had stage 4 cancer which had spread plus sickle cell anaemia and assumed all she needed was surgery and care to recover.

If I knew all those, I would pray for her but assume the worst. Sickle cell and cancer is like having a car accident and then having another car accident in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. Only God can help her and the family can do what they can, but truly this is not one of those issues throwing money at will solve.

AdaAda1331:
This is very good advice. It's something I'll definitely take into account with all my relationships. You've actually given me great advice I know I will practice. If knowing this is the sole reason I felt compelled to write this, it was definitely worth it. I truly appreciate it.

It's okay, love. I spent my early 20s reacting to things. In almost all situations, I was totally justified but people started using it to pin a label of "controlling, commanding and difficult " etc on me. It didn't matter what I said, if I reacted to something, some manipulative person was there waiting to pick it up and twist it. Manipulative people are a dime a dozen because it is one of the easiest emotions to use to get your way. So you gotta be careful.

AdaAda1331:
Thank you for all of your responses, I honestly appreciate each of them. Your responses are very similar to my mother's, my brother, his mother and other of my family members. Very different and very honest.

Someone above mentioned that I should treat this as a car sale. You're actually on to something. I still see this in a similar way but not totally. In my mind, he's a Lamborghini but that doesn't mean it's the only Lamborghini I'll see.

Alot of you gave constructive criticism that I may be controlling or I should be mature and I don't have people's skills. I understand that as well. I haven't dismissed my opportunity of growth. I know there's still a lot for me to learn. I also understand that its what youve been able to decipher from my short message. Understand though that I'm not affected by his brother calling me names. I actually laughed when I heard it unintentionally. I didnt take it personal because I knew it wasn't coming from a place of constructive criticism but just plain criticism. My parents are the ones in disbelief, that I haven't even done the introduction but his family are already calling me unnecessary names out of spite.

I made the decision last week to end the relationship. I came on here to see if I did it with the right mindset and heart and I know I did now because I have peace. My point of view is to allow things to run its course. I'll focus on my graduating next year as I have been and I've told him to do the same. Nothing stays the same, I know we will both come out of this. I don't know what will end up happening, but I've decided not to focus on that.

I think you'll be fine. And please don't take the comment about People skills wrongly, almost everyone I know doesn't have it, heck I'm still learning it. That laughter at his comment, that was a reaction. And one day, if you're not in a good mood or having a bad day and he makes another spiteful comment, you will flare up. Because you're human. Trust me, I've been there. And the other party immediately seizes on my reaction and plays it to an attack against me. And later on, it hurt. Because an innocent moment was turned into an opportunity for a goat to be spiteful.

Great people skills means you won't react immediately, not even with laughter. You will go "hmm, okay" in the calmest of voices and continue the conversation. My MiL has mad people skills, I've never seen her truly upset or angry in that she won't react at that possible moment but pass the message along later. Her eyes are always on the end game. The worst thing she has ever said to me, had so little sting in her tone, but I knew she wasn't happy with me. And it is so effortless, it comes off as genuine and sometimes, it only dawns on you a week or month later what she really meant. She knows when to smile, when to be calm, how to be underestimated but still be a juggernaut, when to react, how to always sound sympathetic no matter what, how to pass across a message without getting her emotions and feeling involved and how to code her emotions when she's angry. That is what makes her awesome...and dangerous .

Ochyglowsglows:
@ Onegai, i will still say there is nothing wrong in her family making it seem like it wasn't that bad. U know y, cos no one would ever want to lose a loved one. I put in the little i had for mayowa and i do not regret it. In 2012,when my dad was diagnosed for lungs and liver failure, we went into huge debts trying to see that he got well, even though he was a chronic smoker, and he still kept smoking while he wa even ill, we cud av said this man isn't even helping himself and let him be especially as the doctor told us he might barely make it. But we kept borrowing to make sure he got well, eventually he died. In 2014, mum was diagnosed of dementia which the doctor said was as a result of high bp, and told us to just let her stay home and nurse her whichever we could till whenever God decides to take her. But we began to make some research on it, we took her to some other hospitals and carried out several brain scans that went into hundreds of thousands. This was just barely after recovering from paying off d debt incurred during my dad's illness. What am actually driving at is that, when u have someone very dear to u, going thru a life threatening illness. You d do whatever to save them. God is in d best place to judge if mayowa's dis wrong by painting the picture that her illness wasn't that serious (as u claim)

I have several medical consultants in my family and the first thing they will tell you is that Cancer is the worst thing to happen. They have come home to cry from losing a patient to amounts like N1000, sat down and held children's hands when their parents were not there. One of them has told a cancer patient "you can fight this but you have children who need to go to school and have a life, don't put them in debts they cannot repay". I too have lost loved ones. I'm sorry for what you've gone through, but please, do not play that emotional game with me.
If they had said "the doctors here have written her off but we won't give up till the final moment", trust me, this issue would have been avoided. Palliative care is what she needs. They had to move her treatment to Dubai because the medical staff cannot certify her fit to fly to the U.S.

Please don't give me that "you will do anything" line. Because there are others who can be saved, who are not milking any emotional plug.

It seems like there was some issue of miscommunication on the part of the family. The young lady in question is at stage 4 cancer. It would take a miracle, not the best medical care, but a miracle, to survive that. Her family wanted to give her every fighting chance. That is very commendable. But the information passed along seems to have communicated to everyone that things weren't so bad, if they could just raise the money, she would most likely survive the treatment. I think that is why people are calling it a scam. Some people in this situation, actually donate the money for their treatment to another patient who has a better chance of survival. I wish the family had painted a better picture from the get-go. The situation is sad.

The same situation played out not too long ago on Family section: someone came and framed a story in such a way to sound dire and people hurriedly donated, only for them to find out that the situation was not as bad as it seemed and he manipulated the story in a way to raise quick support. Same with that Lola lady: I spoke to several people who knew the case and when I heard what they had to say (with irrefutable proof), I was ashamed that people had manipulated her story in a way to gather momentum and castigate doctors, all in a bid to play on the public's emotions.

Children are starvig to death in our country. We don't care, we are bickering over politics and letting foreigners care for them. Then later we will thump our chests and say we are the "Giants of Africa".

AdaAda1331:
You have it exactly right. That's why I'm on this forum. I know you all can't make the decision for me but I'm having second thoughts if this is something I'll immensely regret doing/not doing. I had an idea about his family behavior but it never directly affected me until now that I'm being attacked. I know God wouldn't want me to make a decision out of fear but I'm still on the fence if this is also God's way of telling me to run. I see the fire now before marriage and me saying yes will be me putting my hand in it. I don't know if that's wise.

I don't think you should get married to him, just yet. Because you're not ready.

And as for his Family being crazy, puhlease, half of everyone's extended family can redefine crazy (someone once forbade his entire family from attending his brother's wedding. Imagine not one sibling showing up to your wedding. Awkward!). Another married a Simpering Miss, who once she started having problems with her hubby, proceeded to blame his mum, sisters, his brothers (none of them even knew they were having issues), moved out of the house and told everyone they threw her out (they only found out 4 weeks later that she had moved out) and her lies got so stupid even when there was video evidence disproving it, but it causes friction between the husband and his mother and siblings. Yeah, crazy. So, what is happening to you sometimes happens to a lot of people.

But you are not ready or matured enough to handle it. Someone said something over the phone and you're already panicking. What happens when they say it to your face? You can't comport yourself to smile and keep a straight face to make them wonder if you give a shi.t

And your family and friends know you. So they know you're not ready. That's why they're telling you to run for the hills. Your degree and your relationship with God and your value doesn't make you ready to handle marriage, it's your People Skills that decide the quality of your marriage. Think I'm making that up? Out of all my friends and former classmates, the more Christian and "good" the women more, well, the more likely they ended up Single mothers, divorced or not even married. I'm talking 15 years later from when I met them. So, yeah.

Let your man settle himself, financially and emotionally. And you learn some People Skills. Before saying "I do" to anyone.

ifyalways:
Never knew that library is open to the Public.Well done,Onegai

ZODML is open to the public as well. It's on Awolowo way, Ikoyi, after Goodies supermarket. It's a very good library. www.zodml.org

oriaburefarms:
Hi everybody. I'm looking for a specific type of fertilizer for my plants that lack micronutrients. It's iron chelate. If you know where I can buy it or atleast know a company that I can ask, please let me know

What quantity do you need? I know someone that works for a fertiliser company.

Touchmeder has turn professional gardener o! Coco, that was well done of you and you picked nice colours for each container.