₦airaland Forum

Cantonese:
Good response.

But on the money matter, what should he do if there is no money?

In all, I think the OP is deceitful. He talked about hiding the garri that he brought from the village. Can we safely say that he was hiding food from his brother first? Remember that what a person sows, he reaps.

If Op is serious , I’ll give him N1,000 for 15 weeks ( to the end of the year ) to at least make sure that he’s got food in his stomach.

There are always 2 sides to a story.
Was he always like this when you first moved in with him ?
Reasons why his attitude would have changed could be that
1. You are not pulling your weight around ( Are you doing house chores ? )
2. Humility - in your write up, you in some ways come across as entitled.
3, lack of love . I can’t imagine having my younger brother around. My house is his house . But I would also tell him that I’d like my house to Remain my abode.

Solution.
Whatever you are keeping he’s seen it I.e your Garri and is offended that you are keeping it from him.
Talk to him and have an open air discussion on modus operandis in his house.

Namaster:
Thank you for this.

Imagine some guys here trying to absolve the sexual predator and blame the wayward girl. We get it. These kids are exposed to sex and sexual contents at a very tender age.

They are wayward and we get that. But let them be wayward among themselves.

Bleep all you want but don't Bleep a minor. A 30+ year old married man has no business having sex with a 16-yeae old.

If you can't draw the line at 16, then where are you going to draw it?

I advised the OP to pursue this case and have the man arrested because he's a pedophile. Children are not safe around him.

He needs to be jailed before he ruins any more lives. If he gets away with no consequence this time, you can rest assured there'll be a next time.

Arrest the pedophile!

By the way if the girl was the daughter of a celebrity, jobless people would have taken to the streets chanting "justice for X". But that's not the case because no celebrity is involved.

While it's the new normal for 16-year olds to be sexually active. It's not normal for a 30+ year old man to pursue them for sex. More importantly, it's NOT legal.

Jail the rapist.

Aptly said.
He as the adult should know better.

Them go dey pose , Them go dey denge denge .

Mustiboy:
Hey, everyone

News just got to me that my friend's sister, who is barely 16, has been pregnant for the past 5 months. This came as a shock to me as I wasn't aware of any such development, neither was my friend. I've informed him, and he's furious.

His mum had held back to the info from him because she knows he would get angry. He's always lamenting to the mum about how she's ruining the girl's life by allowing her to have her way, but she would even defend her, restraining my friend from disciplining her.

My friend and I grew up in the same area and haven't been home since like a year now. That's why neither of us knew about this pregnancy. Info reaching us confirms that she was impregnated by a married guy whose wife just put to bed.

Now we don't know if he's had any arrangement with the mum or anything, but my friend wants to treat this case as taking advantage of a minor. Yes I agree she foolishly spread her legs, but I strongly believe she was lured with money, given how these young girls are gullible and easily bought with money.

How do we handle this issue? My friend is thinking of reporting the case to the police. This is not North. How do you sleep with and impregnate a minor?

I'll appreciate any helpful suggestions on what to do.

Well I’ll start by saying she isn’t the first teen mama nor will she be the last.

There are 2 options
1. She’s a minor so go to the Police.

2. She’s a minor so go to the police.

What happens if she dies during childbirth?
If they both were minors I’d say keep this internally.
What happens to the child , it would be reminder of her mistake and hinder her all through her life unless she gives it up for an adoption!

Undilutedme:
Hello nairaland family.
I trust you guys are doing fine.
I have a little problem and I need a piece of advise on how to handle it.

I have a very wonderful mother. She's caring, sweet, compassionate, name all the good characteristics of a good woman, she's got all but there's this problem I'm still having with her. SHE NEVER APPRECIATES ME, NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY. My mom will never appreciate me for anything I do, even if she does, she does it nonchalantly like it doesn't matter. She compares me with friends at every slight opportunity she gets.

There was something that happened. Momsy travelled sometime around this year and stayed for close to two months and she has a shop that she manages. The shop's generator has been bad for sometime and it's really stressful for her selling with dim lights but she refused repairing it again because according to her, the generator is consuming her money because of too much repairs every time. So I wanted to surprise her, I called a friend that fixes generator to come help me fix it so when she comes she'll see that it has been fixed. My friend came and fixed it. When momsy came back and I told her that I fixed the generator for her, she told me that, she didn't send me to fix generator for her and that she is not going to use it. According to her "I send you make you fix gen?. I say I nor wan use the gen again". I swear I was really hurt.

On another occasion was during the just concluded UTME exam. My friends wrote before me, a friend of mine had 330 so I told her, she was very happy. She was like, I pray you get something like this. Fast forward, 3 days later, I wrote mine and result came out. I scored 314, when she came, just happily told her, instead of being happy, she just hissed and said "You nor fit get reach 330?". My spirit just died immediately. She likes comparing me with my friends.

There are many occasions things have happened but I'll not bore you with unnecessary talks. It's really eating me up emotionally and psychologically. How well can I make my mom appreciate me more?. How can I please her?.

Ps: Please nobody should throw insults at her. I beg you in the name of whoever you serve. Thanks.

Well I am sorry to say the following but
1. Are you sure she’s your mum ?
2. You may have been born to her at a very difficult time in her life so whatever you do doesn’t amount to a grain of salt .
3. It’s rare for a woman to not show appreciation

What can you do
1. Find out from DNA !
2. There’s nothing you can do except she heals from whatever underlying issue.

Immanuel5984:
THIS WHY I FROWN AT INTER-RACIAL MARRIAGE

There’s nothing wrong with IR marriage.

This happens everywhere folks.
Even in the west.
And there are 2 sides to a story.
What I don’t understand is why she didn’t ask him to use a Condon ?
I mean what did you expect would happen having unprotected sex. Especially with a foreigner.
The only reason why this is news is because of the economic situation we find ourselves in 9ja.
There are many one night stand turned pregnant and you abort, give up for adoption or keep the child.
I hope she at least has a picture of the father to show the child later in life !

Absuchat:

So if as a medical practitioner, you should get arrested for every death that occurs under your care, even without any proof?

For an arrest to occur they have seen some evidence of foul play.
Again she isn’t the police mouthpiece so it could just to help with the investigation and not an arrest

My solution
1. Only use professional hookups .
2. Have them leave phones at the door
3. Dim the lights

I’ll say a Suya. I came all the way from Australia because I missed it bad !!!
First stop - The University of Suya .

I must have been living under a rock . Never knew the dude while alive. In death even the Lagos State governor signed condolence book .

IjeBos:
I'm sorry, but you're experiences aren't representative.
1954 - Brown v. Board of education - desegregated schools
1964 - Civil Rights Act
1965 - Voting Rights Act
1968 - Civil Rights Act
So your argument is that in ~60 years all the racist people who were alive died off and the racism they thought their children faded out as well? I assume every white person over the age of 65 has/had racist inclinations. Serves me well.
And where would you live that race wouldn't be a problem?

Now you are mixing things
The OP talked about experiencing racism which is day to day living . He did not ask if USA didn’t have racist laws.

Rossikk:
Garbage.

YouTube is filled with ‘KAREN’ videos where some white ‘Karen’ is telling a black person that they couldn’t possibly afford to live in their neighbourhood, and even calling the police on them!

And in this year alone there have been several mass shootings targeted at blacks just for being black!

What garbage ?! Are you going to take a handful of Karen and say … that’s how every white person thinks ? Most Karen’s are republicans anyway.
Plus, would I want to live in a place where my privates can vanish in thin air or I could be lynched in a twinkle of an eye.
I ain’t saying it doesn’t exist but you won’t find me where I know it exist !

CandidAdmin:
Which country? Are you saying you've never experienced anything close to that?

WOW!!!

If you go looking you’ll find . If you mind your business who cares

Besides
Good Sex
Peace
Good Company
Being employed

Nothing Else

ogododo:
https://dailytrust.com/subsidy-back-as-fg-pays-n169-4bn-in-august/

TLDR sorry

I don’t understand the backwardness we are in 2023 . Hand them over to police .
There are people in high places legally stealing from you. Why not beat and stone them ?

abbaapple:


Long over due mehhn!!! Ban the mofo!!!

If everyone had a billion
1 who listens to whom ?
2. Who does laundry
3. Or drives the bus
4. Or Cooks
5. Hyper inflation so whatever you have would simply cost x billion $ more.

I guess Robots !

Brokeness:
So during yersternite's duty, this Lexus ES300 Uber/Bolt driver carrying 3 girls drove to my pump for fuel of #3,000 (5 litres) requesting to pay via card, which the POS machine declined (I think it's Zenith card). On letting him know, he pleaded with me to try again.

Normally, I don't try a declined card twice on my pos to avoid 'debit without approval' (a situation where a card is debited but isn't approved by the POS transaction) customer wahala. I do tell them to check another pump if they can't make transfer. But I had pity on him due to the way he was pleading so decided to help out as he wasn't having cash, neither could he do transfer.

Due to the rush in my pump, I gave him the POS machine to hold while it's connecting, so I could attend to other customers.

Brethren, that was my second biggest regret this month (first one was someone that did transfer of #6,000 to my First bank from opay because Access bank transfer wasn't going throughout that day, up till now, I'm yet to see that one) cos some moments later, this dude legit looked me eyeball to eyeball and told me approved to which I asked again, approved? Which he repeated loud and clear, Yes, approved bro. but it was a big fat lie. It had declined again.

My motive of asking was to confirm because I had ran out of paper roll so I couldn't print it out and dude was in a hurry begging me to sale for him first when I insisted to go and get a paper roll, so I didn't bother to verify if it really approved by going back to 'reprint' to check the status of the transaction. I just swallowed his words — hook, line and sinker.

It pains me most from the bottom of my heart 💔 because this is money that I was supposed to add and pay my faculty fees — deadline is tomorrow (I was lucky enough to borrow from a colleague) But this dude and several others effortlessly scammed me and put me in huge debt which would be debited from my salary because I decided to trust my fellow county men.

I still have the failed transaction receipt, and will keep it well. I will upload the pics when I get home in the morning. Though, I don't think I can recall the guy's face if I should see him again, but then, miracle no dey tire Jesus!!


My advise to you all is; 'In all your doings; "Never trust a Nigerian — dead or alive." I have learnt my lessons, albeit the hard way.


Thanks for your time.

Sorry for the inconvenience
If you can still trust .
I’ll pay the #3,000

Matix222:
Is this normal? No text, nothing I have been waiting since morning nothing yet but she is posting on her WhatsApp

She isn’t your gf!
If you didn’t know … now you know !!!

blessingnenye:
What are some of the biggest turn off for men.

Materialism.
Insensitivity
A woman who keeps numerous male friends in the name of not putting all your eggs in one basket.
Nagging and lots more you can find in the article.

https://loveonet.com/5-biggest-turn-off-for-men/

Materialism
Empty -Vessel ( if you don’t know that 7/0 is infinity bye bye. )

Samantha124:
But you guys are missing something here, let's be honest here... I father can no longer be financially supporting a daughter that is no longer a virgin.

Because immediately she starts sleeping with men, she becomes their responsibility, unless she's working and is able to provide for herself.

Imagine a girl that's sleeping with her boyfriend anyhow going to her father to ask for money for sanitary pads, when she has a man that's been drilling that same hole she needs sanitary pads for.

Immediately a girl becomes sexually active, then her mother should become her father's only responsibility since she's his wife and the one sleeping with him... Unless the father still insist on sending her the money.

As long as she is sleeping under his roof and has not been handed off to a guy in marriage , she’s his responsibility. All that stuff she is doing is “ on the low “

Fathers must love their daughters so that they can find love and affirmation in all the right place.

Just came to gain experience

She not your wife. You just knocked her up not once but twice 🤦🤦🤦🤦

If you have it in affluent areas and I have a vehicle - a Jalopy , I can still visit being a riff -raft. Either you allow all or allow none. Plus some areas are zoned industrial so technically nobody would visit during the evening to make it happening.

The reason it’s fenced is purely a security measure. The Nigeria factor people will break in and steal.
People steal cables from a functioning transformer. CCTV ain’t gonna stop nobody from stealing

jmoore:
This woman is married to a man that cheats on her.
She is tired of the marriage and was contemplating walking away from the marriage.
She decided to retaliate by cheating with a friend of her husband. The cheating ended up in pregnancy and she is feeling suicidal.

She should abort now.. why will you cheat with no condom ? She doesn’t have my sympathy! Be wise about it

TongueTwista:
Na una sabi!

It's not as if womanising is even cheap or a profitable venture. Just dey give yourself unnecessary stress. As I never knack in 8 months, see as my skin fine, I come fair like Daddy Freeze.

Just one month of womanising and I'll start looking dusty like Bola Tinubu. Abeg I no do!

Lol 😂

I am not going to comment on if the OP post is true or not .
All I will say is that west environment is not conducive for a man to cheat . You cheat and if the woman can’t forgive you . You loose half your $hit so why marry .

On the flip side , I have some friends who have wives living on separate continents .

The side chick keeps asking “ when am I moving in . The dude informss her right before me. “ listen there is a madam of the house , let’s draw the lines of relationships status now , we are having fun, mutual benefit . We see, I give you something , you give me something, let’s not spoil what we have !!

We are wired differently. Men and Women. On average Men are always the pursuers, initiators of relationship. For a woman to think that her husband is going to be celibate or masturbate daily to deal with his sexual urges is not realistic.

Woman can withstand the same sexual urges for longer periods - it’s proven .

How many men will stay unmarried if they loose their spouse compared to women ?

Yes both parties are hurt by cheating .
Women who think their husband are ok because he doesn’t ask for sex 2/3 times a week are deceiving themselves- he has an alternative.

Women who want to punish their spouse with sex - you are deceiving yourselves - there are alternatives.

9jatriot:
I know most parents begin to backdown when a child approaches 14 and further backdown at 16. Just curious, if as you got to around 14 they stopped micro managing you would have still gone haywire when you got your freedom during service?

Was the whole approach bad or that he just did not know when to stop?

I think without a doubt - my attitude would have been different . You want a healthy dose of liberty and rules. Some parents would allow their kids make mistake and then correct them while others will try to prevent them from making those mistakes.
I think he did what he thought was right.

Kondomatic:
I don't see how parents being strict increases a child's libido

Let me explain as someone who was brought up strict.

Having helicopter and strict parents means you are macro managed. Curfew was 6pm . You had to be home for dinner and at sleep at 8pm. No parties . I was woken up at 3am on weekdays to study till 5am . Additional Sleep till 6am and then took the bus to school . School was 8am to 3pm had an hour break and then evening school was 4-7pm.

I had friends but no girls were “allowed.”. I mean if you came to my house and asked after me and met dad, I wouldn’t get the message. Mum - yep . Plus with dad you just put more shit on my plate.

Went to church on Sunday and sat in the men’s section for those of you who went to Anglican Church . Women left , men right side the youth sat at the back. I was told sit with men .

Time and space wouldn’t let me go into details but I couldn’t play street soccer . Whenever I played it was before popsie got home . There was a day , I experience two emotional highs and lows at the same . Long story short . For those who played “ set “ . You decide prior first to 3 or first to score and you battle. This game was hard but I scored the winning goal as my mates were celebrating me, I saw someone point and say - home. It was my dad. I begged him for 500meters , the length of distance to get home. I still got caned.
And there are many other examples.

I had a group of friends come and beg dad for me to play a soccer game. He said no and I had more homework to do .

The only time he backed off a bit was when I told him I would cut off his head cleanly from his head with a machete . This happened when I was 19. I said, I have done everything you asked of me yet I can’t go to parties or have female friends or I can’t say I am going out to visit friends .

2 weeks later I had these uncles come and try hold me down but I beat one silly and the other I slashed with a machete - the. He knew I was serious.

My freedom came when I was posted to serve .

My dad and uncle want it to be Lagos, I said nope. Been to Lagos done it , tired of it . What else does Nigeria have to offer ? Was posted to Edo state - I went crazy with freedom and ladies . I must have had like 50 girls for that one year. First time touching a female anatomy in daylight .

Most kids from strick parents have pent up emotions , may not be able to relate well with others or over do so. Want people to like them and some are introverts. One thing for sure - is that they are Hot , at least I was /am .