₦airaland Forum

'This is the best sex I've ever had'

All of 20 seconds of it!

You can always get a family member who might be good at it to do it for you . . . . . .

spoilt:
We are in a recession oh. You can do your own makeup. Just draw two lines where your eye brows should be and you are ready for your big day.

roflmao . . . . . that was funny.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]I was thinking something along the lines of physical threats

Leave country ogini wetin? Na him get the country?

Ignore him jare, if he persists, get a male relative to put some sense into him.[/color]

Thank you jare!

luxoire:
hahah see what i mean by your funny!! (i bet you some ppl will tink you actually mean this and miss the sarcasm - whether intentionally or not)

It seems you understand me well well. No mind them ohh. That kind sms will be one filled with juju to do such a thing to a woman. Fall in love in deed.

Anyways, it's all for fun. . . . .  

wow, I have fallen in Lurve with all of you. Your poetic skills is really something ohhhhh, I no fit sleep, I no fit eat. . . I'm sooo in love. . . . just from simple sms.  yes ohhhh. somebody help me come back to my senses. !    

@ topic nope!

My younger bro when in secondary school used to buy luxury donuts, sweets etc from the supermarket and come and sell it at school, put the canteen people out of business.

Oh pissed. . .

debosky:
Marketing team? Someone from NNPC and Gazprom sat together on the evening and cobbled the name together.

lmao. This is what you call real 'unity' to the highest level.

luxoire:
no mind them! because na so all naija babes dey, surely dis one too want me to stalk her

I like reading your posts, they are soo refreshing.

As for me? No means NO!! simple! Shakara? I'm sorry, but no time to waste abeg. !

If I say 'maybe' to something, it simply means that i'm not sure and I need to think about it, nothing more, nothing less.

C2H5OH:
If it were menini? Biko stop coughing like a diseased granny o jare speak the words on your lips.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Is why I prefer older guys. . . .

Have a nice day am going to work.

C2H5OH:
No ma'am that was at topic.



As for what you posted though, I'm not sure exactly how to comment on it.
If you prefer older guys then more grease to your elbow. That's more of the convention for women anyway, so it's not like you are stepping out of bounds or some shit.

Ok sweety, no problemo, because you know if it were. . . . *cough cough* . . . .

C2H5OH:
Maturity? They say with age comes wisdom.
Maybe they "papa" you.

Was that implied to me?

I prefer older guys, not 17 years older though , but for me it's more of a maturity and being on my level/wave length kind of thing. I am financially stable myself, so it's certainly not a financial thing and I grew up with my dad and many brothers in life so it has nothing to do with that either. However, I did actually date a guy who was younger than me and he was one the most mature, responsible men I had ever met. . . . . . . .

I hate G-Strings, because they are just that, a piece of string I can make myself. I prefer my frenchies. . . (boy shorts). . .

lmao, SALE sign on one of them .lol

More. . . . .

Here some. , . . . .

Well, I think examinations are more like a test of memory. . . . the things you remember from class, tutorials, text books and lectures etc.

VOR:
With regards to point two, I don't think it is quite that simple.
When the kids are born what names do you give them? Also
do you call an imam to name them after 7 days as is the muslim way
or do you call a pastor? Or maybe even do both?

Marrying outside your religion takes a lot of tolerance, forbearance
and one or both parties has to compromise. I would say such a union
could never work if both parties are quite into their respective religions.

This is why number 1 on my list was positioned there in the first place, with the emphasis on 'heavily'.
It is not unheard of to give children a muslim and christian name. What about nigerians who give their kids English as well as Nigerian names like myself.
You can do both of everything and let the child later decide which path to follow or neither. I couldn't marry someone who is tooo into his religion (if opposite to mine) as it gives him the chance to impose it heavily on me and i'm not ready to convert.

Was a veggie once. . . . . , then I came to my senses.

Lady T, I have been laughing here at your posts!!!

I know exactly what you mean. I was taking my niece and and cousin to naija, and we all needed visas in our passports, so I did the postal service as I had done for myself before. I paid the postal order for all 3 to avoid paying a fee for each individual one. I didnt receive these passports back after 2 weeks, so I went down there and asked them whats was going on. They said,
'Well, we tried to call you, but you did not pick!'

I said, 'Oh really, so you could not leave a msg or write a letter'.
Their reply' Well we don't leave voicemail on people's phone' . . . . .

Can you imagine this crap? ? ? ? ? To make matters worse, their missed call was a private number!!!!!

The classic: I actually witnessed an employee taking bribe! In this Uk.

I would give my parent an ultimatum,

Your Happyness or mine?

Yes I could marry someone from another religion as long as:

1. He does not impose his religious beliefs heavily on me.
2. He allows our children to make a decision on their own to which religion they wish to follow
3. He doesn't stop me from practising my own religion.
4. His parents and family are not against our union because of my religion.

The above are none negotiable. Otherwise, NO!

Romeo4real:
Ok, having observed many a poster get upset and angry at the sheer volume of insults and abuse they get in replies,I have decided to do a public service and post a few tips on how to avoid.

(1)Do display a modicum of intelligence. It does helps. NL is a forum where people contribute and discuss issues, but at least show that you you have more brain matter than a lizard by the quality of ur post.

(2)Dont put up stupid posts, or ask idiotic questions like - If you found your Father killing your Mother and ur child, which one would you save first, or My Fiancee slept with my sister, and cousin, together! - And I dont know what to do.

(3)Dont be a hypocrite! this is soooo important if you dont want insults. Saying you slept with ur Husbands best friend, and asking for help(), then getting offended for being called a cheap LovePeddler - This just wont wash with NL'landers

(4)Yes, NL is a free forum, but pls avoid putting up posts that make it look like u have too much time on ur hands, and ur just a non-productive parasite, like - Do u ladies think im hot? with the accompanying silly picture.

(5) Make sure that ur post is easy and clear to read. Ur writing a post, not sending a text! And yes, we do know that Yoruba/Ibo/Hausa and other numerous dialects are really ur "first" language, but, Haba, you did go to school now? And moreover, forum rules do stipulate this.

Well, that's it. If you mind being ridiculed,abused or insulted, if you are of a sensitive nature and disposition, if u easily get hurt by tactless comments, if it offends you when your intelligence is questioned, or your mental state scrutinized, then Nairaland is simply not for you. You see, NL is not for wimps, and only the strong, with thick alligator like skin, can survive.

Remember, most people who reply to your post are just like you. When given the chance, they can be tactless, lack diplomacy, discourteous, and downright rude. For NL'landers, sensitivity is just a word from a Ralph Tresvant song; But it's all part of the fun and not personal.

Enjoy.

ROFLMAO. . . . . you are very right my dear. Am sure this shall help many a people.

Moonstone:
See this Joseph. Keep wishing o! That's good to hear.
Are you answering him? He can't even rent a girl to shower with him not to talk of having one.

roflmao!

Pataki:
Curiosity kills the cat!

If I have to tell you, then I have take bath with y'all! Hey, nice idea though!!

With the present heat wave around, a cold shower together surely ignites the passion the more.

Go and play with your 'teddy'!

Moonstone:
Hi darling! I missed you o! We no even see your break light again. I dey o! How you dey?

I missed you too ohhh, I fine sha.

No mind Pataki, he only going to bathe with his sponge tonight!

Moonstone:
Yes o! With who?

lol. Heyyyyyyyyyy moonstone, wetin? how you dey?

Yes oooo, I can do it, especially if I have slept with him already. Oh, the enjoyment of scrubbing his back and *cough cough* other parts of the body, woo hooo!

I'm sorry, but if you have slept with him/her, then what's the biggie? If not then fine!

Pataki:
I can, and I have. Will I still do it again? OH YES! Possibly tonight sef.

with who? ? ?

Honesty is the best policy.

The truth shall set her free.