₦airaland Forum

anyimontana:
That's the curse uve brought to ur family..kip on collecting bribes and making illegal arrests, making things hard for common men..soon u will rape ur own daughter at the age of 13..

please be careful, if you wish him bad, fine but not an innocent 13 year old daughter. Be careful.

Benclever1:
Hello everyone.

So I met this girl through a mutual friend and we started bonding. Initially, I didn't take the friendship seriously because this lady is a little older than me and I do not see any future between us.

Now, things got more intense between us. She visited me one time, one thing leading to another, we were in bed, about to have sex and then I pulled out the condom but she refused, insisting that she doesn't enjoy sex with condom. I was very surprised to hear that, so I tried to make her see reasons why the condom is very necessary. She adamantly refused. We ended up not having the sex that day.

Just last week she visited again and we spent the night together. We tried to have sex again but the same issue came up again. She insisted I must not used condom. Now this got me upset. During the conversation that ensued, she made it very clear to me that she does not have any STD/STI so I should not be afraid. She however admitted that she was ovulating and that the chances of getting her pregnant was high, but that I should not worry that she'd take care of herself and the pregnancy, if it happens. She said that she would not force me to get involved with the baby if I don't want. However, she made very clear that she's not ready to get married. This got me confused.

I don't want to let my guards down by indulging in unprotected sex with someone I don't trust. I also do not want to hurt her feelings. So I plan to take her for medical tests next week and then we can kick it off from there.

What's your advise for me.

Thank you.

The moment die dey hungry you and you still dey calculate the most expensive way to die.
it is just one vaginal out of 4 billion vaginals in the world. .
Guy japa o

Ekakamba:
I ain't.

You deserve the best things of life but such amount for such small job isn't a wise choice in my opinion.
If you invest half of your pay on rent, what happens to your plans for future? or you don't have one?

Ekakamba:
Forget that yarn.
I earn 45k and my rent is 250k (almost 6 times of my monthly income). Legit hustler ooooo.

you're joking

Nice dedication

next news please!!!

Jewessgratitude:
I do not wish to argue the word of God.

same here. but make sure you study bible properly.

Jewessgratitude:
Read your Bible. What happened at Pentecost? Its says they were filled with the Holy ghost and started speaking in tongues. So yes I speak in tongues because Im filled with the Holy Spirit.

I laugh in Japanese. Stop piling unrelated verses to prove your point.

A305:
This hurts because you had true and genuine intentions.

Psyched her up to get educated and begin a career. Surpported her all the way and she ended up betraying you. Hurts man!

Easy to tell you sorry but hard for that experience not to remould you. You will be good bro.

You don't understand women psychology, she see you as nice person, yet not attracted to you. Simple.

pickatyou:
The boss is about to be out.

Welcome back.

Haters gonna hate
Same way
Potatoes gonna potate.

See them!

The ones who have lost all characteristics of what is called sanity, all for the sake of getting money.
Fraud, killing, maiming, stealing, cultism and ponzi is the order of the day, Your type don't value society nor humanity. **spit**

phunbyt:
I'm a graduate learning Programming at the moment.

Since I can't learn coding on an empty stomach with no support from anywhere, I decided to take up a job as a classroom teacher in a primary school. The pay is #22,000 + lesson fee of #8,000 and I get extra #2,000 for the transportation cost of one of my pupils.

My monthly transportation cost is #8,000
Hence take monthly income is #22,000.

The perks of lesson notes and marking is killing me, besides shouting upandan in the classroom as I get home mostly exhausted.

Now I got a "connect" to drive for a car hailing service in Ilorin (like uber). According to the guy I spoke with, the pay is between #25,000 to #30,000 not yet sure, also there is a tendency that I may have to spend t-fare of #6,000 that is if I'm not allowed to take the vehicle to my place.
Which will bring the monthly down to #19,000 or #24,000

But I'd have time to rest and i won't get exhausted as usual

Hence my confusion. Should I go with the stressful job with a better pay or the less strenuous one with a lower pay. Also I'm considering the lifetime of the businesses due to the seasonal revenue of Ilorin, the school has a better chance of survival than the car hailing service job.

Please advise me.

Bro you're in a setup

My first question to you is this...
What is your qualifications? I mean academically

TalkTalkTwins:
k

se dem space bookers

novice22:
If God answers all prayer, I would have been dead because I told him to take my life if I ever go into betting.

I told Sango, god of thunder to take my life if I ever repeat my past mistake yet I am finding it very difficult to let go.

I think it will be easier for me to make heaven than to quit betting forever....I have done a lot of things to let go of my addiction, but none is working.

I believe a problem shared is half solved that's why I'm bringing this here.

Mod please a lost soul.

Have you tried caging

iRepNaija1:
You're going to end up assaulting a woman and when the police arrest you and ask you why you did it, please tell them the same explanation you just told me. Nonsense.

This post your wrote is very shallow.
who has talked about an assault here
Get out!

ifyalways:
A pastors daughter does not care about pre marital sex, even her Pastor parents that consented to the awkward marriage.

If it's just one of those church weddings and certificates and no registry certificate, its easy for you to walk out of the marriage now. Tell her how you feel and If she wants to keep wearing wedding band and stay married to herself just so she can keep up appearances, that's her own wahala.

Your child though should not suffer for your indiscretion. Make she s/he is well taken care of.

What kind of stale advice is this!
What gives you the impression the man isn't the culprit here, what gives you the impression that he wasn't the one who went looking for trouble.
Irresponsibility smells all over him **yuck**
He wasn't even man enough to admit he went into th marriage instead he told us his wife parent and wife force him in.

Bro be careful how you advise people especially when it comes to relationships, I don't think you're married yourself.
If your are then I perceive you could be irresponsible yourself(no abuse intended, I am being blunt here).

donbachi:
If people know what happens to those they leave behind after committing suicide.many wouldn't have tried it.and their are also those whose destinies are tied to theirs.imagine those people whose destinies are are tied to this guy...may our future destiny helpers not commit suicide.in Jesus name.

Keep quite jare!

Ginaz:
I trusted her, In fact she was a sister to me not a friend . That was how I took her to be . She is good , lovely and beautiful but her bad side unfortunately is jealousy, very intense one. She doesn’t know how to trust and I was the only friend she had too. All her friendships always failed .

Eyah, sorry o.
No matter how much dedication, TRUST is the foundation of any kind of relationship, it's a pity she get to lose her friend including you. I still have this kind of friends sha, I mostly ignore their excesses most times although for your case she went over board by trying to tarnish your image.
What a life.

Ginaz:
She took it I didn’t know , We were together on that fateful day.

Let me Guess both of una nor trust una sef. because Why the heck would she wanna do such and not just that she when as far reading them.

As a rule of thumb sha I don't date people who has dated anyone in my circle, but that wouldn't hinder my rapport with them.

Ginaz:
I’m over it . thanks .

Girls una funny o, how come she was able to check your chat logs?

[s]

Toks2008:
Do you know that it is practically difficult for a lady to be with a man she has no desire for?...and whilst it is easy for men to manage a lady they don't really have feelings for, it will be very difficult for a lady to do same but unfortunately in most cases when a lady sees a guy she strongly desires, all she does is wait and hope the guy woos her...an unfortunate situation I must say.

A lady who has no feelings for a guy will find it hard to be under the same roof with such let alone allowing the guy to touch her in anyway thereby making the guy go through serious heartache and emotional pains...yet if the same lady sees a guy she really desires, she is compelled to just wait and hope or maybe show signs that may not be understood by the guy.

I had always maintained the notion that ladies should be with a man who loves them even if they don't have any desire for the man but this is simply because most ladies usually wait for the man to make the first move even when they are drooling for him and it makes no sense for a lady to be selective when all she does is wait to be selected even by a guy she so much desires.

So i begin to wonder why ladies had to go through the pains of just wishing a guy they desire walks up to them when they can simply walk up to the guy and tell him straight up?...in my opinion, this does not reduce the worth of the lady but it is how a lady comports herself in an affair that determines her worth. If a lady expresses her desire for a guy and he turns her down, the lady should just walk away with her head up high...it changes nothing about her self worth but real men will even respect her for that...but the shocker is that in most cases, men Don't turn down ladies who decisively woo them.

Ladies must understand that we live in the 21st century where gender equality is the order of the day and what is the essence of gender equality when ladies can't express their desire to a man just as a man would?
Enough of the silly hard to get act or showing subtle signs that you want a guy...IF YOU WANT HIM, WALK UP TO HIM AND TELL HIM.

It will shock many ladies to know that there are many responsible marriage ready guys out there who are just fed up with the wooing game and will practically fall for any lady who genuinely shows interest in them and this is the secret few ladies presumed to be "bad girls" are using to get sweet responsible guys.

As long as ladies allow and themselves to be curtailed by the tradition of men making the first move,they may have no choice but to learn how to cope with the ones that come there way.

My candid opinion.

What do you think?

[/s]

Ginaz:
This happened to me . My ex best friend told me she didn’t like her ex bf of then . Somehow the guy saw me before he went outside the country , he requested my number from my friend and we got talking . Along the line he said I should be his girl but I refused cos I know how that my ex gf could be a witch when angry .

I told him I can’t date my friend’s ex but the guy kept insisting for a relationship which I never accepted. Well one day my ex gf saw our chats and she went berserk. She accused me of so many things , even what I told her in secret she revealed . She spread false news about me that people who I didn’t know called to ask me if it was true.

She called to tell my people and all who cared to listened that I stole her guy.

It was such a horrible ordeal for me . I and the guy still talk but it’s just on a friendship level . We have both ignored her . She still stalks him till today.

What an ordeal, sorry o

sweerychick:
Whose Fault Is It Anyway?

Good evening nairalanders!

I need serious opinions on this issue, as it has bothered me so much so I decided to bring it up here. It's about my younger sister and her girlfriend.

About 2 years ago my younger sis girlfriend met a guy that indicated interest in her, according to my sis her friend wasn't into this guy, in fact her friend was using him from the onset, my sis said that her friend told her that she doesn't like the guy at all because the guy according to her was a teacher in one private school and he isn't really what she wanted in a man.

But this guy loved her and my sis recounted one time the guy paid her tuition fees and gave her money for her project work. The guy was always there for her but her sis friend never liked him sometimes my younger sister will tell me that she should go for him she thought she was joking but little did she know that her girlfriend was serious.

When it was obvious she couldn't play the guy anymore, she had to confront the guy and told him face to face that they can't continue together, that she can't put up with him anymore and that he can have my younger sister as a friend since my sister is her roommate.

The guy was shattered and devastated, and it equally shattered my sister as well because my sister knew how much sacrifice the guy has made for her girlfriend. So the guy would meet my sister and start begging her to talk to her friend, and each time my sister tries to talk to her girlfriend to reconsider, she would turn it down.

So the guy gave up his efforts but maintained communications with my sister.

As time went by my sister and this guy became close, and they were good friends, so early February this year they guy got a contract job with Exxon mobile for 5 years at Akwa ibom, and he is now asking for my sister's hand in marriage. He's so serious that he has brought wine to my Father with his family members.

My sister told him let her put it in prayers. Because she's currently doing her NYSC.
Upon hearing the news of my sister and this guy, her silly girlfriend that rejected him because he was low, is now beefing my sister and telling the whole world that my sister snatched her boyfriend away from her. it was so bad that she even tried to re establish communication with this guy again.

My sister told me that her girlfriend sent a message to this guy and told him that my sister once had an abortion when she was in her 3rd year, and some stupid lies. But she said that the guy knew that her girlfriend was lying and decided to block her. This got my sister infuriated and me also but the guy begged us to let her go That she's just desperate.

But I'm really really really angry now because she has been spreading malicious lies about my younger sister. And my sister is planning her traditional wedding with this guy by January So please I need suggestions on how to deal with this issue because I don't see my sister at fault here, and I only see a wicked and desperate friend trying to cause wreck in someone's happiness..

Mods I really appreciate if this topic is on front page because it's a serious issue..

Your sister broke the don't "date my friend from our circle" but she owes here no single apology.
The pained soul could go to hell for all I care.

iRepNaija1:
This is the problem with you and other men: if a woman says no, you'll keep pursuing and bothering her until she says yes. Can't you just gracefully take the rejection and find someone else? Haba!

A No is one word never to take seriously with women, even they themselves know it. A No could mean
I don't trust you,
I am afraid,
It's too early.

But annoying things is that guys fails to read the mean and still comes back samw way, which will then become annoying.

maximusprime2000:
From experience she know what she is doing by HAPPILLY making another guy feel like a boss while d op looks like a muppet. discussion with her will only triggers his mumu button. If i tell u my current situation u will cry for me. Wen i hear people say true love is wicked and blind i dont understand cos av been a player all my life. Experience is a mean teacher o. I woke up with pain in my chest every morning now hopin i get well soon. Swift actions is d only way d op can take his balls and respect back from her now. dat will send better msg to her cos talk to her is too cheap.

it will be better not say anything to those kinda babe, it is better to just end the relstionhip straight amd just say you're no more interested.

you could also play their own games

themaestro08:
there is nothing unmanly here. Its a matter of figuring out things logically. If I have an issue with anyone, I prefer we talk about it. After that I will pay attention and see if the outcome is effective. The moment I realize am been taking for granted I will simply walk away from such toxic relationship. There are lots of decent people out willing to give true love you know, so why should I stress myself? This is a more sensible approach. And more importantly I have nothing to lose.

Many of this girl that have undercover lovers know you're hurting, they like to find your mumu button and keep pressing it, next time you come across someone like her, try your tip and she will gladly tell you that she would stop.

Long story short: She wouldn't stop and You must have to preach the same sermon like every sunday for next two month before you quit out of frustration.

Best thing is to just kick her out like you said or play her games.

For me I like playing games with them

Talking are for girls that have you at heart but got distracted.

Kingrefreshed:
I support the first Motion! Women can turn water into blood when power is given to them.

How does this translate here?

This post have changed my life

neonly:
Before crucifying d man let hear the other side of d story
Women can be very aggressive especially when they become d bread winner
Through I don't and will never support d man action towards d innocent children but hmmmmm women they can bring out d worst in a man after they will be forming the victim my opinion sha

Here comes the men that are never responsible for their actions.

sylvez:
You are actually stupid my guy...
I was once this stupid...
I experienced exactly the same thing you are experiencing now....
When i confronted her about one of the guys, she said how will i be asking her weda she is seeing a married man, that the man is a married man na!!!

To cut long story short, i love my woman but sometimes love is not just enough...

We didn't break up, three weeks ago she told me she will travel for a cousin's wedding...i didn't know she traveled for her traditional wedding....she sent me the pictures today and informed me that her white wedding is next weekend.

We never broke up!!!

All the while i was dating myself...It's so painful but you just have to let go....

She did all these to me when i needed her support for my professional exam coming up next tomorrow.

I loved her but see my life now

You mean she was so good that she made those illusions seem real right?
Something tell me you saw the handwriting on the wall but you still hope everything will be fine until it became too late.

themaestro08:
I get you bro. Remember to "trust people actions and not their words". She clearly knows what she is doing and she is happy that she is getting away with it.

Am not sure she truly loves you(even if she does it must be negligible). you need to man up and have an honest discussion with her regarding exs and male friends, state clearly what and what acceptable. Make sure the outcome is something you are comfortable with. But if she object, then toss her out and walk away because thats a toxic relationship. and I can guarantee that you will be better off without her.

Mistake 101, if you try this, she will sweet talk you and tell you that you're paranoid. Don't try this at home.

It will even make you look less of a man, Girls of this nature are well prepared against confrontation of this manner.

sylvez:
See the way you are proffering solution like say na exam hall you dey.

Your solution is so theoretical.

Bro, in practice, i mean in real life scenario...once a girl is into you because of what she is benefiting and not because she loves you, she will keep pressing your mumu button...you want her to show some commitment? she will show you more than commitment since that's what you need...she'll practically do anything to make sure that the benefits she gets from you does not stop.

But when a lady is into you because she loves, but starts giving you the kinda attitude op mentioned just know that she's no longer interested in you.

You should know that most ladies don't marry who they love but who is ready to marry them.

The solution to op's problem is to understand that he's no longer or was not in relationship with the said girl....so, Mr op, goan look for another beautiful lady that will love you....all na by luck.

You are right with other ladies. But for this one that keep undercover lovers, leave them to me.

Simple rule: Love them as they love you.
Else you will have heart attack.
I speak from many experience.

motionarena:
There is this girl am dating, and we love eachother or so i think.

She is fund of doing something that pisses me off.
She at times uploads her WhatsApp status with random guys but that is not the worrying part.

The strange thing is the caption that follow the status.
She will give d guys pics captions like
"My love, i will always love you"
And stuffs like that.

I have seen her do this for 3 guys on three different occasions.

When i query her and ask her why she will do such, she will say they are just ex-school friend's that the guy in particular has helped her in the past and she is just appreciating them.

And mind u this same girl i think loves me has never uploaded a pic of me on her own status to appreciate me.

I beginning to look stupid.

Stop querying and asking her about those guys, that will show your insecurities.

Stop posting her own pictures also, reduce the way you chat and communicate with her, you need to start letting her miss you a little. if she confront you, don't cry and pour out your emotions like a naughty baby, just comport yourself and tell her that you're busy and carried away with job. Don't confess how you feel, if you do she will laugh hard on how important she is in your life. SHOW A GIRL HOW IMPORTANT THEY ARE ACCORDING TO HOW MUCH THEY START BECOMING COMMITED TO YOU. 30% commitment deserve 30% percent compliments and nothing more.

Focus on your life and get your focus on your career and plans. Get busy with your hobbies and work, stop unnecessary expectation from her

Give her some space to miss you, and stop your UNNECESSARY GIFTS, FAVOURS AND LONG CHAT AND HANGING OUT.

You said she don't post your pictures, YOU ARE AN UNDERCOVER LOVER. Open your eyes, You're chasing shadows. Go out and date other girls and don't tell her, if she finds out, tell her it is nothing serious BUT stop this act as soon as she start showing much commitment.

To get her attention you need to respect yourself and understand you deserve someone better than her, follow 50/50 rule, never loves her more than she loves you.

MY CONCLUSION IS THAT YOU TRYING TOO HARD TO LOVE THIS GIRL. SHE OBVIOUSLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO TELL YOU SHE IS DOING YOU A FAVOUR.

I HAVE DEALT WITH HER TYPE AND I LOVE THEM, IF YOU'RE NOT LIKE ME THEN TELL HER YOU WANNA QUIT AND IF SHE AS WHY, TELL HER YOU WANNA FOCUS ON YOUR FUTURE CAREER