₦airaland Forum

culf:
you shouldn't assume that, I know a lot of parents that don't put pressure on their kids.

running won't solve anything, they have your number and they know your address, so they can visit anytime and continue from where they stop.

When it happen, make them understand, asked them, if they want you to rush, make mistakes and end up divorce? just calm them down and on your own, try to go into good relationship, when they see you in a good relationship, they won't pressure you but in all, never settle for less in the name of pressure, stand your ground but don't push them away, parents will always be parents

#What makes you believe you won't be married by next year?

(are you the first child or daughter).

Lol...married by next? Lol ... Don't crack me up pls.

I'm the first born of my mum and her only daughter. I've two younger brothers

Nicepoker:
That home you want to run from. You will go back to that same house with unwanted pregnancy.

Lol

akwesenana:
She doesn't deserve it.
If I commit suicide tomorrow, hold her responsible.

Nawa o...things dey happen. Just so you know, no matter what our parents do to us, we're not supposed to be the custodian of their punishments

Loveladies:
All you need is a wicked man

Ok

culf:
1. Its not every family that put pressure on their daughter, what made you think your family will put pressure on you, my family don't and no one cares.

2. For whoever that want to pressurise another, distance won't be a barrier. its just to develop thick skin and make such person to know that their is time for everything and mounting pressure on people makes them do serious mistakes.

I foresee it, especially on marital issues

culf:
I don't know why are the different negative post about late marriage or choosing not to marry at all.

Some marry late and have the best of marriage life. No be who marry first oooo, everyone has his/her time.

@op, nice one, sincerity is good, your man that you blow you away and wow you is coming, don't allow anyone's post get to you to make you change. meanwhile, its also better to love or go into relationship with someone that loves you very much, maybe more than you love them.

But at least, you also have to have even an iota of feeling for them. I maybe wrong, but it's like most people commenting so far are misunderstanding me, and that's why I've chose to read and ignore their comments. When you at least like someone, you put an effort in that relationship. You anticipate talking to them as well as seeing them and more. I've stated in my post that I know love isn't enough in marriage, but love even if it is little from both partners, is essential.
I'm not building castle in the air nor have I set my standards too high as most commenters have stated. In fact, if I love a guy, even if he's as poor as church rat, I can spend my money on him if I have provided the love is mutual. I'm not the type who explains myself much especially not on a forum like this where I know there considerable amount of misogynists. But I know some few people will understand me. I'm also a realist, and that's why I'm worried at this age23. Ordinarily, some girls will think they are still at their prime age until they approach their late twenties. I understand time flies, and I'm a very futuristic person. I do not want a partner I would ever cheat on. Trust me, if a woman truly loves her husband, she will never share her body with any man. Any married woman u see cheating, then her love for her husband is questionable.

czarr:
You are still in love with your ex that broke your heart, and you compare all men that come to you with this ex....if you end up alone it's not cos life did not smile at you, it's because you didn't smile at life cos of your past trauma.

Smiles. To a large extent, you're correct. However, I do not see all men as the same. Just as I don't believe all women is greedy, materialistic, feministic etc like you guys claim. I've just not been able to feel love towards someone else. I wish our emotions are things we have control over.

Is it advisable for a lady of maybe 25 years to leave home immediately after NYSC just to save her self from foreseen pressures? I'm still an undergraduate. Will be round off in less than a year by the grace of God and may ASUU not embark on another strike. I've been thinking a lot these days, and I'm just not confident enough to face any pressure from families especially after NYSC.

To those who left home after NYSC, with no hope of where to go, how to start or what to do, were you able to scale through? Did you regret your decision?


Pls, share your experiences, especially if you are a lady who has experienced this. Thank you

akwesenana:
It depends on the relationship you have.

I'm 21 and the no born my mother well to try to control me.

It's because of my elder bro and also my self respect that I'm not over the board.

But if my dad was around, I might not have been like this.

Not because he was harsh but because I respect him.

And you don't respect your own mother?! Incredible!

siofra:
Chai! Nigerian millennial and gen X parents are creating a generation of traumatic gen Zs. They'll regret this.

It's not easy out there, my dear.
If you already have a skill you're earning money from, it should not be hard. And this may sound cliché but if you're determined, you'll make it. Or you can save your NYSC allowance and invest in a business idea, if you have one.

But my best advice is that you should use this time to learn a skill, preferably a digital one. My suggestion is UI/UX and graphic design. I have a friend who did this and now she's doing very very well for herself.

But don't expect it to be easy o. Learning a skill is not easy.

My parents are not making life hell for me. They're wonderful beings, but I just foresee that no matter how angelic our parents are, once it comes to marriage and earnings when you are of age and they ain't seeing any signs, they might change side in split of second

bisqit:
how old are you

I'm 23

Slmgirldippussy:
You just met her ...but you don't understand why she need commitment.
Yiu want her to understand why you need sex. You want to use sex to study her.

Well done Mr scientist

Lol

siofra:
So, you're a graduate. Have you gone for NYSC?

If you have, why did you come back to your parents house?

Pls, how can one go for Nysc and not return home. I'm thinking of that already, even though I'm in my penultimate year, but I can foresee that life at home after NYSC will be hell for me. I don't have the courage to face that. I'm 23 as well

Veiniously:
Hello sorry, I want to know are you done with school

I'm in my penultimate year. If not for the strike, I would've been rounding off by now

Good morning, everyone.

So, I've been reading certain trending posts on this forum about women's late marriage lately.
And having gone through most comments, I realized that certain people are ignorant ( I'm sorry if this sounds rude), some are not but chose to be wicked and heartless with their comments, some were mature, empathetic, and mild with their comments ( kudos to you guys).

I will take my self as an example. I understand there are greedy, materialistic, rude , arrogant feministic women etc. Out there

However, they are some virtuous women who were just so unlucky to have life offer them nothing, or opposites of their desires( I understand we can't always get all we want in life).

I as a case study, i'm a young girl of 23. As much as I do not pray for wretchedness or poverty ( let's be sincere with ourselves, no one wishes for that) I've never been moved by material things owned by a man. Not cars, not houses, or his worth in cash. Yet, the fact that I haven't found someone I feel even the smallest of feelings for has kept me out of relationship. To me, one sided love is unfair to the one whose love isn't reciprocated. I understand love isn't enough in marriage, but we can't ignore the fact that it's its foundation. I've rejected certain proposals that I personally feel bad that I fear i might even end up alone, but at the same time I can't deceive or pretend to love someone I do not love, cause even the presence of the person let alone his touch will irritate me. I just can't see my self doing that. I'm not making this post to portray myself as righteous or a good girl or whatever you guys might call it, but I just want many of the commenters bashing women to know that there millions of women like me out there, who are still unmarried because they chose not to be deceitful, but yet, life hasn't smiled at them.
Not all women is intentionally over selective, not all is arrogant, not all fight equality with men, not all is badly behaved. Life is just not fair to some. Thank you.

You rendered me speechless.
Me wondering if this is how my own younger bro will be thinking of beating me up in few years time. Olagbara o

Chummynoni:
well, you are not far from the truth. In my own opinion, most saying degrading things about ladies , it is either they don’t understand that there is no manual to life or they are young boys without life experience. You can’t see a mature man reasoning the way they do. I want to use an instance.When I was a corper, there was a lady that kept herself for her fiancé I.e she didn’t mess with anyone hoping that after service, she would get married to the guy but what happened? The foolish guy broke her heart, it’s been more than 4years now and she is still single but to some idiots on nairaland, they would assume she lived a reckless life while younger. My advise to you, when you see a thread where they bash women, just assume that the ones doing so are bitter boys.

N:B to the stupid ones that would want to quote calling me a simp or whatever names you call your irresponsible fathers, I gladly accept that i am a simp to my lovely wife for a decade, a feat your fathers couldn’t achieve due to irresponsibility on his part

You spoke well. Keep speaking, sir.

FrancisDiote:
First of all I didn't contradict myself because I didn't say ALL ladies are...

Secondly, it's not a crime for ladies to take the first shot. When guys approach girls, they don't show desperation and so girls shouldn't show desperation. That way they don't get exploited. Everything is a risk

Yinmu. Easier said than done. Comma say the same thing if you were a woman.

BePrepared:
Guys its plain wickedness to mock these ladies, let's be considerate, sincerely I pity them.
Ladies on the other hands don't mess with your lives while young. Stop building castles in the air, settle with any reasonable guy that is genuine and serious while your flower is still fresh.

Say no to premarital sex

No to pre marital sex is reason why some are still unmarried. What would you say to that?

GoodIsGod:
I have a Christian Lady who is a close friend. She is Forty and no marriage and no kids.
Her major reason of still being single is that she wants to stay a virgin till marriage but every man she meets want to have fun before being committed. Once she denies them, they Waka.
She has good shape and a good face. Not ugly at all and very hardworking.

I pray for her daily to get a man.
I am just glad for her that she remains a happy woman despite her challenges.

Trust most NL's men to criticize such lady for being overly selective, bad attitude, greediness etc if she seeks advice from this forum. Empathy is really a big thing we've lost in this part of the world. I'm not justifying the greedy ones, overly selective ones( of course select, but with moderation cos I don't advice anyone to marry someone who's abusive in the name of marriage), but most of them, once any post is made to bash women, they become excited. You will see them commenting and rejoicing that I wonder if these commenters are the kinds of men women are expected to settle down with. They are bullies, that can reduce any woman's self esteem to nothing. May God grant all good women out there good husbands, Aameen.

Aguilar:
i feel your pain dear. Just work on yourself and look good.

Lol... U need not feel my pain. Plus, I gat no problem. I'm not perfect, but my attitude aren't intolerable. You should be careful what u mock people for. It may not concerns you, but you beloved. My 10kobo
You're free to rain insults. Bye

Aguilar:
your problem. It's not my fault you're a woman. If you like blame nature

Lol ... Blame nature? Nah.
Bask in the euphoria while it last

Aguilar:
Unmarried women are just littered everywhere like strays waiting for a responsible Innocent man to claim them . It's not our fault they are unmarried. No man like stress. We just want our peace. If you can't give us that, then you are OYO.

We know this is a thing of joy for most men, especially on this platform. Continue

benqo01:
Even people dey wey don marry for here dey shout marriage is not everything una well done stop that rubbish

It's Nigerian society I blame, sir. I know marriage is necessary. In Islam, when you get married, you're fulfilling half of your Deen. However, not all women will marry at the expected age due to certain circumstances. However, trust the society to be there to judge one and see one a bad omen.

FrancisDiote:
Not all ladies, but most ladies. There's a man for a woman. It's not a crime for ladies to take the first step.

Lol... You guys contradict yourselves in most of the things you say.
Not all ladies, but you generalize. It's not a crime for ladies to initiate, yet most guys take advantage of such ladies. It's okay if you don't like them and reject them. Guys get rejected as well, but most guys won't do that. They see her as vulnerable and take advantage of that. Tell me, if you were in women's shoes, would you take such risk? Pls, be sincere.
At times, I just read comments silently and laugh at what most young guys comment which is opposing to the reality. I'm a young girl as well.

I know they are ladies who are prideful, saucy, and ill-mannered. However, they are some chaste ladies who not just lucky. Plus, nature has really favored men in many aspect. That's the reality!, And that why I laugh when some women drag equality with men. We're unequals, whether any lady takes it or not. I'm a lady as well.
Beyond greed for wealth, bad attitude, over selectiveness and all other negative things you guys think keep most of age ladies unmarried, there more nonnegative things hindering them from marriage. Thank you.

FrancisDiote:
Ladies have one problem, when most of them are supposed to give relationship a chance, struggle together, build together and have a say in your home, they are busy selling their market to the highest bidder. This is the major problem of a Nigerian girl.

I have one solution, shoot your shot. Who knows you may get lucky

What of ladies who aren't material driven, no loose, but just haven't found someone they love? Or according to you, all ladies are loose and material driven?

Obidients are toxic. I pray who so ever will complicate this nation more than it's now shouldn't smell aso rock even if it's theunnecessarily overhyped Obi.
They are just to toxic. They was even a day a guy was threatening people that he's going to send boys to execute anyone speaking against Obi or talking about Tinubu. They get excited when other parties' aspirants get bullied, but they can't tolerate even a constructive criticism against theirs. It's the Yôrubas I pity. If una sell una neighbor at cheap rate, una no go fit buy at expensive rate. The kwenus are already telling us what they are going to do to us once they get there. The writing is clearly on the wall, yet some of you are shouting Obidient. Call me tribalistic, but which tribe no go support him tribe at war? Dey there dey shout tribalism, until reality dawns and u see that these people gat zero likeness for us. I'm not supporting any candidate nor am I campaigning for any( take or leave). I'm just fed with the level of toxicity of the so called Obidients. In fact, if this forum wasn't faceless, to freely air one's opinion na with fear. Oga o

forexwilliams:
Source: https://www.vanguardngr.com/2022/10/fg-apologizes-to-students-parents-over-prolonged-ASUU-strike/

We don't want apologies. Ask us not to pay next session tuition fee

FalseProphet1:
I see another strike in the coming months, the strike would be the longest in the history of ASUU, I see universities being turned into farms and poultries, I see students forgetting their department, level and the course they're studying.

I turn to the East for answers and I see hope, I see Peter Obi winning next year's election, I see Nigeria becoming better than USA UK and Canada combined, I see whites struggling to come to Nigeria, I see our Visa becoming the most sort after in the world.

This I have seen.

General overseer. Just tell us u wan campaign. Mitchewww

Myzubby:
it depends on what you can do . It totally depends on you , before you launch in to any business spare time and money to learn about it . There are business that doesn't seem to be profitable yet others make a good living from it .


It all depends on your ability and the skill you have to handle the business.

You talked about fast selling , my dear you cannot sell fast if you do not know no the right strategy to employ in your sales or business.


You must understand the marketing strategy applicable to that business before you can make sells.



I started dropshipping on nairaland here I pick peoples product and resell on my s.m accounts many NL are wholesalers and they are willing to give a discount to resellers from dropshipping products I started importation of gadgets from China alongside other businesses I do .


I will advise you to learn from others and learn about the business you want to get into learn how to run ads paid ads this will help in promoting your business and help you upscale your sales.

I hope this helps

Thanks for this

I've been so curious about the business I can do that wouldn't in jeopardize my studies. A simple and fast moving business. Even if the profit is that much, so far it's fast selling, I'm okay

Build with him.