₦airaland Forum

What a rare gem...ruled by the dictates and conviction of God in his heart and not by what this demonic society or the association of randy he-goats would rather he become!

Radoillo:
Migrate back?
The second biggest wrong that the Whites in America have done to the Blacks there is making them believe that they have no claims to America. You never hear White Americans talk about a Back-to-Europe Movement.
Acknowledge your African heritage, but understand that America is every bit yours as it is the whites'.

I agree. Do you think the fight for racial equality is inappropriately placed today? We get to hear of some movements/uproar on racial inequality when some white guy and black guy is involved. Meanwhile the main issues killing the blacks in America is mostly poverty which in turn brings about black on black crime. Where is the uproar on that? Black Americans fought and still fight for civil rights, but you find out that other minority groups/ immigrants take advantage of these institutions of 'equality' and all the black american does is to keep on fighting for other people to benefit from.
It's ideal to have racial equality, but in a system where an Indian would rather hire an Indian, a White would hire White, a Jew a Jew, I believe black america needs to change its 'equality' strategy.

She looks better black.

Other than some 'faint traces' of Native American blood, Ruthanne said the family background is Czech, Swedish and German.

Lol, not one single black blood.
People are saying if Bruce Jenner can pass off being female, she should be allowed to call herself black, lol.
Passing off someone else as her father must have been the last straw for her parents. I don't blame them.

TV01:
You too?...I used to relentlessly devour M&B...all my early game was learned there...
TV

Lol, I'm surprised you did. Boys usually don't have the patience for such books from my experience, they would rather watch po.rn or look at some playboy mag. No wonder they lack imagination on how to set the mood rolling. His imagination is limited to the awkward style he wants to squeeze the woman into. What a bore! They don't get it when we talk about being ravishing in bed before you know it they will turn it to some sadistic abuse. *rolls eyes* With romance/erotica novels you make use of your imagination, you know what to say, how to set up the mood, what to grab, how to grab her etc.

coogar:
so women are attracted to the money, not the man?

There's a pattern in these romance books- good looks, confidence and rich. You need to have 3 of those. Being rich and not good looking...iyama. I wouldn't even read it as a teenager then.
Now the dominance does not mean abusive, that's where men and women get it wrong. It can even mean what you say to the woman and not the action of the se.x itself.

it's your duty to communicate - don't just expect men to know the exact mood you are in. we are not omnipotent. if you want it rough, say so.

I agree but the truth is that it spoils the mood jare.

coogaluta:
choooiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!
This girl must be Iron lady
Will you marry my brother?

Naa, I wouldn't even call myself an iron lady. I'm one of the quiet and reserved people you'd ever meet, who don't want to be bothered. But when it comes to queer morals especially coming from Nigerian men, ewooo!

raumdeuter:
If he wants to marry you as his 5th wife not just a fling would you still decline
I mean if Dangote wants to marry you as wife #4. What sayeth thou

I would decline. So raumdeuter money is supposed to make me accommodate being a 4th wife, like I'm poor or what or can't live within my means? Na so money dey shack you?
Dangote cannot open his mouth and ask me that kind of question because before such a question would pop up we might have gone through a series of dates. Those series of dates would never have occurred.

Part of the success of Fifty Shades , is that there is a variety of sex scenes in the book in which the main female character, Anastasia Steele, finds herself swept away by her own passion. She is being ravished by a devilishly handsome and psychologically dysfunctional Christian Grey, with whom she has an immediate and lasting committed relationship. This monogamy allows her to experience many dangerous and edgy sexual adventures.

Lol, you think if Christian Grey was poor and ugly he would be granted such liberties?

coogar:
from my experience, every woman fantasises to be ravished the way a lion mauls a buffalo. the only problem is - they want the choice of who would ravish them as theirs. so if any man who doesn't fit into that fantasy tries it, it's rape & he would go to prison deservedly. if it's a man that fits the picture then it's sweet love making.

I just remembered my mills and boon, harlequin, historical romance, etc days...tehehehe
The other problem and reality is that men are not mind-readers, and have the tendency to be abusive with such fantasies. They don't just get it. There's a mood for that kind of se.x, and most men antennae can't even perceive such mood. What a bore!

coogar:
one of the reasons that power was taken away from them in the first place was because the women largely abused it.

beating up widows, making them do unspeakable things, levying sub-taxes on the bride price, etc. the system was barbaric. the white men had to send the foremothers back to the kitchen.

Lol, they didn't abuse it abeg. The white men were coming from a place where women did not have as much power as in Igboland. We proudly participated in the politics of the land.
Initially, they even thought it was Igbo men that was causing the riots and destroying their colonial institutions, but later found out it was Igbo women acting on their own bidding.
My dad always reminisces and says Awka women were strong and no man wanted to get into their bad book!
Our forefathers were attracted to strong women, not all these sissies we have on NL today seeking for fragile oyibo femininity. The African woman is a symbol of regal strength.

coogar:
the women made it:
the umuadas were very powerful - something you had reiterated time & time again: issues concerning womanhood were left for them to handle.

•adultery
•marriage rites
•motherhood
•widowhood

men had no say in any of the 4 events above. women decided the way they wanted to live until the missionary came to scrap the whole tradition.

This even works perfectly for my agenda because I believe women should determine their own fate just as their foremothers. Now, when we talk about our feminine issues on marriage etc here on NL, I hope you men butt out of such discussions. We are taking back being the decider of our fates as our foremothers did! Whatever we decide we would let you know in the general town meeting. And any angst towards our decisions would be met with boycotts.

I can just imagine a married man having the effrontery to open his dirty mouth and ask a whole Stillfire out, even single guys think twice before they tread my path.

TV01:
Love it Stilly .

But you realise that when "feminism" finally screws everything up, you'll join us in the cave - and resume your natural role as we rebuild. Although I was talking tongue-in-cheek, as I don;t think it wil get that far before[b] womens natural instinct to police other women and protect patriarchy will re-assert itself [/b] .


TV

Not when I'm alive.

coogar:
you woulda been right if the article didn't also state the umuadas determine the severity of the mourning process. so they are not only the executioner, they are the judge & the jury as well.

i laughed out loud when i read the part where they take vengeance if the widow wasn't in good rapport with them when the hubby was still alive.......in some cases, the umuadas actually beat up the widow.

the police only make arrests, they do not decide the severity of the punishment so your analogy doesn't quite fit. women are responsible for women's woes. men have little to do with it.

Deciding the severity of the crime is appropriately under the jurisdiction of the judicial arm of governance, not the legislative arm.
The question now is who is more likely to make the law in a patriarchal system in Igbo land circa 1500? Is it men or women? lol
100% MEN!!!!!!!!!!

coogar:
umuadas are the enforcement agency. emphasis on enforcement!

seriously, you should give up now.

Exactly enforcement, not the one who makes up the law.
For example Umuada were the Police- A police force is a constituted body of persons empowered by the state to enforce the law.
Now who makes the Law? The legislative arm comprised of MEN. Patriarchy is to blameeeeeeeeeeeeeee 100%.

coogar:
chief priest? in the matters that concern widowhood? that's not how it works.....

read this piece - this is why everyone of us here should be scared of cococandy as the #1 umuada of igbo region.

Women were and are the foot soldiers of the patriarchal system that allowed all of these to occur.

sweetorgasm:
she was only defending the love of her life

Lol, what harm could a mum do to her able bodied son that he wouldn't be able to handle by himself , unless she's a witch, has a gun or trying to stab him which are all extreme cases... And you know how sensitive all these our old parents are. Any small thing they take offense... Who has time for their petty wahala?
It's just like settling a fight between husband and wife, and tomorrow both husband and wife would turn against you the so called mediator.

coogar:
oh puhleaaaze....
you women should take responsibility for once. what has patriarchy gotta do with calling junior ones aunty/brother? is it patriarchy that forces widows to shave their heads, drink the bath water of their husbands corpses?

Who sanctioned those dead body bath drinking sessions? Definitely a sadistic Chief Priest with a dangling and reckless anatomy in his groin.
All these are man's 'generous' gifts to women under the institution of PATRIARCHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And because women are afraid to be tagged rebels (like my proud rebellious honorable self )of the patriarchal system, they follow the rules to the T to please people like you.

coogar:
that was a rumour back then.
jay-z never took her name. matter of fact, she toured with mrs carter after their wedding.

Jay Z is not the man then. #goingbacktohatingeverythinghiphopmode.

Ngokafor:
....like seriously i know understand those that say that women are usually the champion of atrocious cultural practices against other women.The bitching here is really an eye-opener to say the least.
..Imagine a brat 10 or more years younger than me having the audacity to expect that i call her 'aunty' and even insisting in collusion with her female relatives(as usual)that i do so..

..anyway i am happy i do not have to deal with that..ever!

..Aunty my left foot..nonsense.

...I guess it's because they know our culture will not give them respect as human beings in other areas, so the area small respect is given to them, they hang on to it like a witch on her broom whether at the detriment of others or not.

coogar:
at least you are not blaming patriarchy for this one. when we say women are the cause of women's woes, you people pull out your daggers ready to stab me.

this is your war - men won't fight this one for y'all.

Patriarchy made women to think of themselves as passive, weak and that is why they fear to go against culture even if it's not rewarding to them. In fact it is akin to the slave mentality affecting black people today.
The passive trait is just for the patriarchal society not to see them as the rebellious, non-virtuous woman.
So Patriarchy is still to blame for every damn thing wrong in Africa today, lol. Bite me.

Even Jay Z also took up Beyonce's last name...
There are men and there are men. Jay Z is the man.

TV01:
I'm afraid it has/is



No, it's Ben Martin (nee Coghill) - husband of Rowan - one of a new breed of men, who are taking their wife's surname.

The last of his name, forsaker of the bloodline, the kinship, ties, the culture and heritage of his fathers. A sign of the feminised, limp-wristed, males that these days pass as progressive and open-minded men - presumably a genital swap will be forthcoming

I's all over Cracky - feminism has triumphed. Lets find a cave somewhere, gather the troops and live out our time reminiscing about the good old days - when men were men and women made sure dinner was on the table !

TV

Buhahahaha. I hope the bats in the cave kick you out of their natural habitat.

She should have minded her own business. Two agbayas quarreling and she decided to make it three agbayas.

Where are the guys that often feign ignorance when we talk about culture disrespecting the place of a wife and women being accomplices and enablers of these kind of degrading institutions? As in this case, it's the women that are bitching and still want to practice this in the 21st century.

How did the chic even have the mouth to tell someone older than her to call her Aunty? At least fear will catch me small.

The word love is so huge and strong because it encompasses tolerance, kindness, patience, understanding, empathy, slow to anger etc.
I don't think human beings can easily meet up to that, but we can at least try.
As Christians we are called to show love to everyone not only our partners. It's very hard.

Look at her face, her choices are limited.
There are some faces you just wanna punch, she fits the bill.

The answer to the questions above is quite obvious. Evidently my position of authority will be greatly hampered should I find myself in any of these situations. That begs the question - can wife battery be justified in any guise? I think every man who has thought about beating his wife is guilty of wife battery because only a coward man hits or thinks of hitting a woman (especially one that can't defend herself physically). This warped ideology in itself is the problem with my society - the misrepresentation of cowardice for authority.

He shouldn't beat himself up too much. Who in this world hasn't thought about hitting someome? Guilty as charged here. I have thought about giving people uppercuts that will send them to pluto.

1. The rage I feel when my wife challenges me on certain issues - is it nature or was I nurtured to feel that rage? If my younger brother or friend (emphasis on younger male), who's taller, bigger and obviously stronger than me, were to challenge me on same issues will I feel the same rage? If I do, will it be to same extent? Will I be as condescending in my reproach of fellow males as I am of my wife?

Lol, so true though.

I think people like Beyonce, Kim Kardashian, Nicki Minaj and all other ghetto, immoral, twerking hood rats have changed society's perception that women aren't sexual beings as much as men are. I guess women are showing us who they really are after all when these societal barriers that restricted them before are broken down.
As far as I'm concerned, all these blatant immorality in male or females does nothing for society. And all of these would have been abetted if we held men by the same stringent standards we held women when it comes to sexuality.

Beautiful girl...all the poor NLder men were angry when they got married and are still angry.

cococandy:
See as dele's pot belly is trying to put him in trouble
When you tell guys to go easy on the beer they won't listen.

Lol.

raumdeuter:
I agree with OP. It seems to be getting worse. youths are just anti knowledge nowadays. even with the internet

Someone would make erroneous statements online, still argue blindly when he can simply google the right answer.

I remembered when I was growing up my dad used to buy 2 newspapers per day and I made sure I read it. I first started with Sports, later I went to politics. I realized from Primary school that you would "shine" if you are knowledgeable. I would go into newspapers and textbooks to read some information I am sure my classmates wouldn't have heard before to shine in School. That way it became a competition between us in primary school.

One day in Primary 3, My classmate told me Australia is in Asia and I "shamed" him, From that day we started a competition in Primary School before primary 5, Like 8 of us knew all the countries of the world and their capital. Later we stepped it up to countries and Presidents, We later stepped it up to everyone studying encyclopedia, we later stepped it to having a current affairs competition organised by we the students, the winner would set questions for the next round.

We took it to High school and still continued with the competition, But nowadays especially with so much entertainment around, youths now don't even want to bother with anything educational.

In my time, the surest way to get a babe and be popular in school was to be a member of the school quiz, JET or debate team
nowadays Its always latest dance steps, music, clothes etc

There are still some Nigerian products who are very good and excel but their percentage to the total are reducing very quick

So so true. Which mouth would an olodo boy use to toast a babe? Lol, his own is finished.
Nigerian babes that would dump you if you repeated a class, lol.
It's not as if we did not know about the latest dance steps then, but there were priorities.
I still think our teachers should have done more though, some of us just braced through school by cramming.

Your wife's issue is not a married women trait...
Reasons I can think of...
1) Some people are just not attached to their phones
2) Some just don't want to be bothered by calls...
3) Her job may have a no answering of personal phone policy, but since you mentioned neighbours, scratch that out.
You know your wife. Is she the type that is always on her phone, browsing social media, texting others etc? If she is, the truth is that she simply does not want to be bothered by your calls, because there's no way she wouldn't see your calls.

There are people that even if I'm taking a shower, I'll pick up their calls loll. The others? ...oh dear I would leave it to ring till eternity.

Good job. More grease to the Yoruba elbows. Yorubas take their culture wherever they go, and that is why the language will continue to spread.

macof:
All those films that have 30% english?
Songs 30% englisch and 20% pidgin

It helps for people like us.

Nonso23:
Flesh and blood did not reveal this to you.,
My standards are already set although I'm sure I will not be so unfortunate to meet with this ilk of women off here. Tufia!!
Cheat, I find out and I end the Union gladly. No bargaining on that one.
If it's the other way round , it's her call.

And you are on the other thread supporting that women remain in these marriages and angered at other women telling her to leave her marriage, lmao!

coogar:
you guys have time arguing with these beings that have extreme difficulty with logic. bunch of hypocrites they are!
isn't this the same set of women that argued a man should never retaliate physical abuse against his wife or any woman as 2 wrongs don't make a right? or am i reading their comments wrongly?
now....they want to open their legs and fück another man because their husband cheated. for most women, logic isn't the strongest point. they would retaliate if it's sex but they don't want him to retaliate when they slap him in the face.
i implore you guys to set your standards sky high. if the wife cheats, that should be the end of the relationship or marriage. no ifs & buts. she shouldn't even be around to know if i would retaliate or not. she's going straight to her father's house!
if i cheat on her, i expect her to leave too. i won't even make any effort to stop her from leaving. if she's worth anything in the first place, i wouldn't have cheated on her. if she stays after my infidelity & thinks she shall be given the same grace if she cheats, then she's on a long thing!

Lol, at least this one here isn't a two-faced idibia.
Your mates are on another thread proposing that women remain in such marriages if they cheat. Hypocrisy to the greatest power. Something they cannot take themselves.
I absolutely agree. Women have REFUSED to set standards for themselves. A woman started the other thread about condoning cheating in men.