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TheFacelessMan's Posts

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Culture › Re: Catriona Laing Visits Ooni Of Ife [photo] by TheFacelessMan: 7:14pm On Jul 26, 2019
OkoYibo:
Make I join you siddon here.

Ipob pigs, keep off.
My paddy how far? Getting lazy and not stimulated to write original stories jare. Recycling some of the older ones. Do you know anything about opening blogs ?
Culture › Re: Catriona Laing Visits Ooni Of Ife [photo] by TheFacelessMan: 7:12pm On Jul 26, 2019
Once upon a time...i was a Prince in the Kingdom of Dahomey.

I was seated on my throne one honey on each arm...2 lying on my leopard skin rug....

The skin was real! I killed it myself, don't be doubting me! angry


My son, the 35th ? Or 36th one ?

I can't remember their numbers, 4 women were claiming they had a package on the way... 0.5 x 4 + 35 = ? shocked



Anyways, back to my story....

The boy was running from the direction of the sea, eyes bulging in their sockets, struggling to contain his excitement just like any 4 year old.

Forgive me now if i can't recall his name, he was Abdul-something. Who memorizes 35+ names by the way? undecided

PAPAAAAA!!!!! He cried out like the cute monkey he was....

Following him closely were my warriors in their full regalia, masks, shields, spears and all...

They had a man in between them, his skin was a WHITE as ours was BLACK. shocked shocked shocked

His eyes were sea blue unlike our brown ones.

The date ? I have forgotten again!

It was sometime in the 18th Century, if memory serves me right.

To be continued .....




Crime › Re: Police Shoot 3 Armed Robbers Dead In A Failed Bank Robbery In Rivers (Graphic) by TheFacelessMan:
angry

As an undercover officer in the Nigerian Police, i was caught up in a robbery at the neighbourhood grocery store at Umuahia

After buying St Moritz cigarettes, I was window-shopping - things my 75000 naira salary couldn't buy

I was at the aisle farthest from the entrance when i heard " Make una drop am!!!, biko, biko!!!"
shocked shocked shocked

[img]https://media1./images/20f243e697a63f526fc9a81600daed50/tenor.gif?itemid=4885182[/img]

1st lesson of Police training school - assess your surroundings.

I quickly checked the CCTV cameras and i saw 3 fierce looking boys up to no good.


1 was guarding the entrance, 1 robbing customers and the last 1 was stationed on the girl at the counter. Division of labour at its best.


Back to my story, where was I?


I silently said my last prayers under my breath unlike the those screaming "Amadioha, Jesus and Allah" at the top of their lungs.

I drew my service pistol silently and inched forward slowly in combat stance, sweating furiously even under the A.C.

BANG! I plugged the Mr. Customer Service. His blood splashed on one fat Deeper Life looking woman.


" BLOOOOOOODDDDD OFFFFFFF JESSSSSSUSSSS !!!!!!!" She screamed. How she knew his name, i know not embarassed


The gunshots were loud and deafening.

Mr. Doorman was trying to run away, fumbling with the lock. I shot him in the back.

Lesson Number 2 : Use maximum deadly force if belligerents are armed. 2 down out of 3.

I turned to face the last one at the counter.

All i saw was the frightened face of the cashier
shocked shocked shocked shocked


Lesson Number 3 : How could i forget ? DON'T BE OUTFLANKED. DON'T BE OUTFLANKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Several things happened in the next 5 nerve-wracking seconds...... shocked



I looked at the girl's face.... her eyes went behind me shocked AND..........



I looked at the CCTV AND...................................................



My eyes saw a running movement in the cameras shocked AND................


I heard movement behind me


A split second before my eyes + brain + feet + ears combined as ONE!!!!!


https://31.media.tumblr.com/715b9dcb7ae640885b2c0779421c8d43/tumblr_n27d8w1j4p1sr1lf3o1_500.gif

I was already diving when i felt the impact on my back, the force propelled me against the shelf full of cornflakes.


I was coughing up blood, my knees bent..... gun lost in the dive when he walked up to me cry cry


He cocked the sawned off shot -gun to dispatch me to my Maker undecided



Lesson Number 99 : ALWAYS keep a side chick

I had a side piece in my ankle holster.... I pulled it and shot him in his right eye.

Maybe i eventually met my Maker, but he definitely did so before me

The End.

Culled from "The Memoirs of The Faceless Man" cool

Crime › Re: Man’s Gun Jams In An Attempt To Shoot A 45-Year-Old Woman In US(Photos) by TheFacelessMan: 12:32am On Jul 24, 2019
angry
Travel › Re: BREAKING!!! Airpeace Crash Lands In Lagos(photos) by TheFacelessMan: 12:28am On Jul 24, 2019
...
Politics › Re: Tinubu’s SW Loyalists Flood Ministerial List. by TheFacelessMan: 8:15pm On Jul 23, 2019
uduak2016:
Fulani rewarding a loyal slave why they continue to make inroads into SW. SW is the remaining loyal support Fulani got, so they have to keep them relaxed o keep their agenda going. Looking at posters above, afonjas hailing him, tells me something congenetically is wrong with Afonja. Like the aturu directly above me.
You actually sound very jealous and in severe pains

Take heart.

TV/Movies › Re: $2.79B, Avenger Endgame Overtakes Avatar As Highest Grossing Movie In History by TheFacelessMan: 8:06pm On Jul 23, 2019
grin

James Cameron waited too long to release Avatar 2.

BUT he's The Man and can't be rushed.

I remember how Terminator: Judgement Day blew everyone away....

He then followed up with Titanic, then Avatar.
Health › Re: Woman Had Chemo & Breast Removal Surgery For A Cancer She Never Had by TheFacelessMan: 7:19pm On Jul 23, 2019
dominique:
The hospital must compensate her and her family handsomely.

Had this happened in Nigeria now, we would have seen comments like Nigerian doctors are quack, Nigerian doctors are wack etc. People need to understand that there's no place in the world where human error does not occur.
That is what annoys me the most.

'Nigerian doctors are useless.. UK /US, here i come"

They never ever try to see positives in Nigeria.

If you ask their personal contributions to improving the situation.... SILENCE.
Crime › Re: former Naval officer convicted of raping 26-year-old woman at his Glasgow flat by TheFacelessMan: 7:16pm On Jul 23, 2019
Ruined his life over sex.

Useless guy.
Politics › Re: El-Zakzaky: Religious Movement Or A Military State Within Nigeria? (Photos, Vide by TheFacelessMan: 7:59am On Jul 23, 2019
Buhari should manage the situation well or...

Generations after him would suffer the consequences.

These guys are angry and fearless plus

Well funded with global reach.

A stitch in time...
Politics › Re: Precious Owolabi Is Dead: Channels TV Reporter Shot During Shiites-Police Clash by TheFacelessMan: 7:44am On Jul 23, 2019
BruncleZuma:
Coming from an individual whose favourite antic is writing incoherent brain numbing BS on NL.

Go bother someone else man...it's too early to start teaching you that probability is not on the side of the police in this matter.
grin grin cheesy

Coming from a closeted bigot whose most intelligent response to anti - government articles is

"grin"

Grow up sonny. Many see through the foolishness.

Don't feel bad if you are not smart enough to understand my stories.

Those intelligent enough are entertained. All fingers BRAINS aren't equal... don't feel bad tongue
Politics › Re: CJN, Tanko Study Law Without English & Mathematics (PHOTOS) by TheFacelessMan: 1:51am On Jul 23, 2019
Generally the standard of education is bad in Nigeria but the North is exceptional!

I was wooing a lady who was in her final year, studying English language and she could not communicate in the language.

I have heard stories of graduates from there who couldn't write their own names during NYSC - i felt there were exaggerations

But these stories as far fetched as they might seem, are often true.
Crime › Re: Man Commits Suicide After He Discovered His Account Balance Is Less Than #2,500 by TheFacelessMan: 12:40am On Jul 23, 2019
losky83:
the problem with this people is the fact that they have no real idea of what suffering really means.he should have tried visiting Africa.
I don't wanna laugh on such a thread but this is so very true...
Politics › Re: Precious Owolabi Is Dead: Channels TV Reporter Shot During Shiites-Police Clash by TheFacelessMan: 11:26pm On Jul 22, 2019
BruncleZuma:
undecided undecided undecided undecided

Nigerian Police and their lack of trigger discipline...will still blame the Shiites last last...
You seem so sure who fired the fatal bullet.

Learn to reason objectively.

This is not the time to take sides; it's tasteless.
Politics › Re: DCP Usman Umar Belel Buried After Shiite Protest, Had Only One Child (Photos) by TheFacelessMan:
angry

This Life... he woke up this morning probably with plans for 2020.... 2023 after Buhari....wedding of his kids...

what he would eat for dinner this night.


All that gone!

The unpredictable nature of Death is just mindboggling
Politics › Re: Police Shoot At Shiite Protesters (Graphics Photo) by TheFacelessMan: 10:29pm On Jul 22, 2019
respect80:
Honestly I'm really disappointed with this comment coming from someone like tonyebarcanista.
If they were truly unarmed, how did they manage to shoot DCP Umar Usman dead?
DCP Umar is a person I know personally which left me completely devastated when I received the news about the incident. As a DCP, he couldn't have been with a gun, yet, he was shot dead. I'm not a Buhari supporter and I will never be. So I condemn his rigidity and negligence of the rule of law as much as I condemned the non peaceful protest approach which El-zakzaki followers usually tag as peaceful. You don't block roads and disrupt the peaceful conduct of people's daily activities and call it peaceful protest.
Both the shiite protesters and the FG (Buhari) all got it wrong here.

We are all aware that the Nigeria police has killed so many innocent people in cases like this but we should remember, they are not mad.
The protesters couldn't have killed such a high ranking officer if they were not armed.
We shouldn't politicize everything because it will surely do us more harm than good.
When I say "us," I mean all of US
What the tonyebarcanista guy doesn't know is that he can actually be picked up for writing an obviously inciting comment.

The pictures of bleeding people showed clearly what the situation was like.... but showing a Policeman carrying a tyre and ascribing his intentions as premeditated arson to frame Shiites ? Is he a mindreader ?

For the record, i am not a Buhari fan too and I feel he should release ElZakZaky for peace to reign but i wouldn't be so stupid to write partisan comments that can cause legal troubles.

The DSS can pick him up... the Police can arrest him saying they were simply creating a barricade.
Politics › Re: Police Shoot At Shiite Protesters (Graphics Photo) by TheFacelessMan:
TonyeBarcanista:
Nigeria police pictured with tyres trying to set facilities ablaze so as to credit it to Shiite
This particular picture shows your partisan nature.

The rest make sense and speak for themselves.

But "so as to credit it to Shiites" Are you a mindreader ?

Be careful starting what you can't finish.... my 2 cents
Crime › Re: Nigerian Man Arrested In India For Duping Marine Engineer With Fake Job Promise by TheFacelessMan: 4:05pm On Jul 22, 2019
Politics › Re: Army Places Hakeem Otiki Under House Arrest Over N400m Escort Soldiers Diverted by TheFacelessMan: 4:01pm On Jul 22, 2019
comshots:
Dem never fit catch tompolo wey dey inside nigerdelta na unknown soldiers dem won catch.
Do you think these guys have the same level of resources and support systems as Tompolo?

If you steal as much as this from a senior Army officer, that's when you would know Nigerian Army isn't as incompetent as their image portrays. Cc Grossprice.
Crime › Re: Chinonso Obiaju: Nigerian Teenager Shot Dead In South Africa – Union by TheFacelessMan: 3:28pm On Jul 22, 2019
KidsNEXTdoor:
sad sad

A 17 yr old went out to buy something from a nearby shop but was chased down and murdered in cold blood..
This is all you can say about it my Yoruba Muslim friend .. A fellow countryman

Thunder fire anybody who says this country will ever prosper... God punish all those who joined this country together...

We are never one.. And we can never be one..
Keep quiet!

What he said is inhumane but YOU are known for not caring if lives are lost as long as they are Yoruba.

You are just as despicable as he is.
Family › Re: Help, I'm An Alcoholic! by TheFacelessMan: 3:24pm On Jul 22, 2019
greggng:
All you need is a good boy friend like me ...I know how to handle issues of this nature....do you eat bitterleaf?
You are THIRSTY! Pun intended! wink
Family › Re: Help, I'm An Alcoholic! by TheFacelessMan: 3:22pm On Jul 22, 2019
cry

My own addiction is energy drinks....

Don't know when to stop!
Politics › Re: Garba Shehu: Why Shiites Protesters Are Not Intelligent by TheFacelessMan: 3:14pm On Jul 22, 2019
I am so shocked with the level of incompetence of most that work with Buhari...

GEJ was terrible but still had some bright minds with him BUT this is stupidity on another level!

Another President would sack an aide for being this reckless!


This idiot just ignited another fire....Vultures like Reno & FFK would scramble to douse it with petrol.

They are typing a response as i just did. angry
Romance › Re: Sex: Access Bank Staff Caught In UNILAG Branch Office Ready For Sex by TheFacelessMan: 11:33am On Jul 22, 2019
jaxxy:
The bank can’t sack him for that a best discipline or warning. He didn’t steal money, office romance in banks aren’t exactly an illegal act for 2 consenting single adults.
In office premises? Are you kidding ?

Do they own the building or Access Bank?
Politics › Re: Cabal Goes For Kingibe As Buhari's Successor Rather Than Tinubu - Prof Kperogi by TheFacelessMan: 11:07am On Jul 22, 2019
richiepolymer:
All those calculations will fail. cheesy

All these is just to whip up sentiments.
2023 is not guaranteed for anyone.
There is no way a northerner will take over after Buhari. It will be the undoing of the North and I guess they wouldn't want the problems that comes with it. Insecurity is high and most middle belt states have been ravaged by criminals who many term as Fulani. That alone is enough to deny the north of whoever comes out to contest.
This is what we patiently try to explain to SE people.

This Kperoggi is playing with their brains just like Reno, FFK and Kanu do.

Hausas are very very savvy politically. They want ONE Nigeria at all cost. They benefit far more than contribute to the status quo.

They know if a Northerner succeeds Buhari, the South might revolt.

So they would go with who they trust more. TRUST, not love.

It sure wouldn't be SE.

Even Kperoggi, Reno et al. would laugh at all the stupid anti Tinubu comments.

In this regime, against all odds, Yorubas have Number 2 and 4 positions. Even Bukola Saraki, ex 3 hiding under the Yoruba/Fulani cloak is Yoruba.

These dumbos think it's all by chance cheesy
Politics › Re: Video Of Dead Vultures In Enugu - Police React by TheFacelessMan: 8:37am On Jul 22, 2019
angry

Years back, i was an infantry man in the Congolese Army.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/ImpishThankfulBeetle-small.gif

While on a reconnaissance mission, we got ambushed.

It was an unfair contest, we were outnumbered and outgunned 10 to 1. undecided

Out of nowhere, a small ball came from the sky and i heard "GRENADE" shocked shocked

Seconds before i heard a deafening explosion, felt excruciating pain and DARKNESS.....



I heard grown men screaming, i smelt the coppery scent of fresh blood, my body aching all over and DARKNESS as i fell unconscious again.

I was woken up by the buzzing of millions of flies and a sharp searing pain on my left leg.....

I looked down and i saw i was covered from knee down with.......

[img]https:///media/8-29-2015/g7SdOU.gif[/img]

VULTURES!!!! shocked shocked shocked

I was being eaten alive! shocked

They were as startled as i was and they flew off with my blood dripping

from their beaks, strands of meat on their ugly necks.

They flew off just far enough from my reach..... watching me with beady evil eyes.

The scent of the blood pouring from my leg was irresistible and they moved closer and closer....

I shouted, they flew off, they moved closer and i shouted. We repeated this cycle till they realized my shouts were impotent and

They became BOLDER, striding forward confident, I was LUNCH and they wouldn't be denied
Crime › Re: Panic As Several Vultures Die In Enugu Market After Allegedly Eating Cow Meat by TheFacelessMan: 12:51am On Jul 22, 2019
DavidEsq:
Haba! It's hyenas that do that, not vultures na. Go read Hadley Chase's "the vulture is a patient bird". Chilling content
Actually read the Hadley Chase. Read 88/92 available books...

Vultures would do exactly as described. I hope you don't find out by experience.
Crime › Re: The Memoirs Of A Faceless Man by TheFacelessMan(op):
TheFacelessMan:
angry

Years back, i was an infantry man in the Congolese Army.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/ImpishThankfulBeetle-small.gif

While on a reconnaissance mission, we got ambushed.

It was an unfair contest, we were outnumbered and outgunned 10 to 1. undecided

Out of nowhere, a small ball came from the sky and i heard "GRENADE" shocked shocked

Seconds before i heard a deafening explosion, felt excruciating pain and DARKNESS.....



I heard grown men screaming, i smelt the coppery scent of fresh blood, my body aching all over and DARKNESS as i fell unconscious again.

I was woken up by the buzzing of millions of flies and a sharp searing pain on my left leg.....

I looked down and i saw i was covered from knee down with.......

[img]https:///media/8-29-2015/g7SdOU.gif[/img]

VULTURES!!!! shocked shocked shocked

I was being eaten alive! shocked

They were as startled as i was and they flew off with my blood dripping

from their beaks, strands of meat on their ugly necks.

They flew off just far enough from my reach..... watching me with beady evil eyes.

The scent of the blood pouring from my leg was irresistible and they moved closer and closer....

I shouted and they flew off, they moved closer and i shouted. We repeated this cycle till they realized my shouts were impotent and ....

They became BOLDER, striding forward confident, I was LUNCH and they wouldn't be denied
Politics › Re: Soldier Mohammed Abdulazzez Killed By Boko Haram by TheFacelessMan: 10:09pm On Jul 21, 2019
angry

RIP. This loss can't be described.

Unlike some other jobs were the training required is not so much,

Filling into his shoes is like YOU with a week's notice having to fight the Heavyweight boxing champion or

Doing brain surgery.

So sad! RIP man!
Celebrities › Re: Timi Dakolo: I Never Discussed My Wife’s Virginity With Anyone by TheFacelessMan: 9:58pm On Jul 21, 2019
grin
Crime › Re: Panic As Several Vultures Die In Enugu Market After Allegedly Eating Cow Meat by TheFacelessMan:
angry

Years back, i was an infantry man in the Congolese Army.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/ImpishThankfulBeetle-small.gif

While on a reconnaissance mission, we got ambushed.

It was an unfair contest, we were outnumbered and outgunned 10 to 1. undecided

Out of nowhere, a small ball came from the sky and i heard "GRENADE" shocked shocked

Seconds before i heard a deafening explosion, felt excruciating pain and DARKNESS.....



I heard grown men screaming, i smelt the coppery scent of fresh blood, my body aching all over and DARKNESS as i fell unconscious again.

I was woken up by the buzzing of millions of flies and a sharp searing pain on my left leg.....

I looked down and i saw i was covered from knee down with.......

[img]https:///media/8-29-2015/g7SdOU.gif[/img]

VULTURES!!!! shocked shocked shocked

I was being eaten alive! shocked

They were as startled as i was and they flew off with my blood dripping

from their beaks, strands of meat on their ugly necks.

They flew off just far enough from my reach..... watching me with beady evil eyes.

The scent of the blood pouring from my leg was irresistible and they moved closer and closer....

I shouted, they flew off, they moved closer and i shouted. We repeated this cycle till they realized my shouts were impotent and

They became BOLDER, striding forward confident, I was LUNCH and they wouldn't be denied
Family › Re: Man Climbs 19-storey Building To Save His Mother From Fire by TheFacelessMan:
cheesy

So touching. Mothers are the best..

That reminds me of an encounter i had rescuing someone from an inferno back in the days.


https://thumbs.gfycat.com/HairyMammothArctichare-size_restricted.gif

I was quietly smoking my marijuana and blasting Bob Marley's songs ...

when i started smelling what was definitely not weed undecided

Thick smoke was billowing from bellow the door next to mine.


I banged my shoulder into the door, crashing in and my left shoulder turned instantly into half-cooked suya. undecided

I saw this girl lying down, crying weakly, all the curtains and the couches were ablaze shocked shocked

Everything i touched seared my palms so i rushed into the bathroom to look for something wet to douse the fire between us.


I wrapped the girl in the towel and i discovered the entrance was aflame and no way out embarassed

I took her in my arms, took a running start and crashed through the window facing the street.

There was a loud WHOOSH and the increase of oxygen made the fire roar louder behind us.

While plunging through the air, i remembered to my dismay that........


WE LIVE ON THE 5TH FLOOR!!!

[img]https://media./images/50d98e7ec2398b81fbc588bea3c3b52e/tenor.gif[/img]


TO BE CONTINUED... undecided


Culled from "The Memoirs of The Faceless Man" cool

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