₦airaland Forum

Op. Don't mind those that have been condemning your suspicion as a result of imbalance in your Christian standard with your fiance. Marriage is a serious business. It's a life time decision. For a true Christian it's for life.

We always advice intending couples to pray and seek divine direction. God must be first.
It's dangerous for a fervent Christian to marry a church goer. It will affect the spiritual and moral upbringing of the children and the family.

It's not about denomination. Within the Catholics there are fervent ones. Is he one of them? A man is supposed to be the head of the family and by implication the pastor of the family. This is the perfect setting.

What I have discovered from experience is that in most homes today the women shoulder the spiritual burden of families. This is because most of the women did not do what you want to do now. As pastor I have observed that majority of the marriages are being managed. What is still holding them is either the children, what the society will say or desire of one partner not to be out of marriage.

I will suggest that you consider the following:
(1) Is he liberal about your Christian faith? I have seen Moslems that their wives and children are Christians and they encourage them.

2) Though he attends Catholic Church as a church goer, does he get involved in non Christian practices or beliefs? I know that a lot of them do.

I have made this lengthy because you are seeking counseling and not mere suggestion.

May God guide you.

Ladies are most times confused in their choice of life partners. To an average lady if you ask her to list out the qualities she wants from her future husband, one of the most common desire is "God fearing man"

But if you ask majority of them whether they can marry a pastor, their answers are no.

My questions are:
(1) Are pastors not God fearing?
(2) What is wrong and/or difficult in marrying a pastor.
(3) Why can't the same ladies that bombard pastors with counseling requests be their wives?

@KimberlyWest

Na Small pikin dey worry most of una.



@me
Na big pikin dey worry majority of us.

@mutter

Don't worry... We women don't need a man to go on his knees to boost our ego.



@me
Correct woman. Good wife material

@frozen70

You guy's will just start thinking on how to make women weak despite the fact that they are called weaker sex

So when a man kneels to beg a woman, he becomes a woman

Those married women that have taken up the responsibilities of the family because the man couldn't make it, has their private part changed to that of men

Meaning such a woman has already become a man

Look, when you see a man kneeling down to beg his wife or woman, his reasons are best known to him and you can't tell him otherwise.



@me
An African woman is an African woman. Even if she is the breadwinner which we know is abnormal that doesn't make her the man.

Kneeling down depicts respect to someone higher than you. Any man that does that has become a woman or at best woman wrapper.

No matter how high a woman is she must bend to urinate.

The man is fully enjoying his investment. Chop ptoto and download with milk.

Long story short..... your wife don do you.

Whatever is sweet may somehow turn bitter. We have been telling you guys that sex outside marriage has consequences but you will not listen.

See your life. Better don't tamper with the life of that innocent child. Face the result of your wild screaming.

@pocohantas

The end of a redpiller, online madness.

Just reduce your dosage to 50mg and join your brothers here, you will be fine.



@me
Hahahaha..... inside me I dey pity you ladies on how you manage to bear all these bashing on this forum.

To some of these boys once they have a bad encounter with some of these loose girls they will come here and pour their anger on you ladies.

I'm sincerely sorry.

@EndRape2
You are among the 1petcent scare Igbo men. Period, this is not generalization it is statistic and research,. Just go to ministry of Justice and tell them you want to take counts of women killed in abusive marriages,. You will see that 99percent if the women killed are married to Igbo men. Their mothers never allow their sons have peaceful homes

It is a sad truth most Igbo men are domineering and abusive.


@me
Hahahaha... which ministry of Justice? Federal? Does federal ministry of Justice keep records of cases in States?

States? How many states did you research and get your data?

Over 80℅ of domestic violence like other private issues in Nigeria do not get to the courts nor even the police because of illiteracy and poverty.

I will like to learn. Please if you have any data from stratified sampling I will be willing to forward my email address so that you can send it.

Maybe you or someone you know had a bad experience with an Ibo man. That will not be enough reasons for your statement.

Mind you I'm not defending tribe here. I have lived all my life in the city. I'm a cosmopolitan and detribalised person. Even if you make the same statement concerning any other tribe I'll still counter it because it has no statistical backing.

We are friends. We are not fighting.[/quote]

@omonighoblessing
is your friend a rich and fine dude



@me
Do you want to take her place? The guy is a backup artist in the game.

She has seen that the only thing he wants is the vhole between her legs and she decided to give it to him and collect small change.

Meanwhile there is the main actor. Do you want somebody's daughter to wait for one "promise promise" boy and become evening newspaper?

After all the vhole cannot be full no matter the quantity of liquid you pour in.

Church of all places.

Stupidquestion, Stupidquestion: Satan has desired to have you and sift you as wheat but I have prayed for you.

Repent!!!

Like someone said.... yes you have wasted five years. You have no space in his heart.

Stand up, clean up and start a new life. Don't listen to anything he tells you otherwise you will waste more years.

Let the past be the past. Move forward

@Bigdik70inch2


[b]Well.......if u have a child already never u get he or she provoked.......

U doing that is you going against God.....




@me
Stop quoting the Bible wrongly. You have forgotten the law of harvest. One day your child will do this to you.

@EndRape2
He looks handsome and good looking, I am sure he will be a very gentle man, and easy going, they are beast and lack self control, I keep saying it, Igbo men are abusive , they all need help , 99 percent of women that die in abusive marriage are killed by an Igbo man.

They are blam pushers , do not be surprise when he starts blaming the woman, instead of him to seek for help to manage his mental illness.




@me
I'm an Ibo man. I have lived with my wife for 28 years I have not raised my hand once on her. I have lived in Lagos since 1977. I don't want to tell you my observation with other tribes.

Stop this nonsense generalisation.

@360degreess
Man of god indeed.l blame their gullible followers Who see them as semi-gods.




@me
Pastors are human. Even the great Moses that spoke with God mouth to mouth showed the human side of him.

I'm not supporting what he did but some people take joy in announcing any small fault form men of God.

@sapphiere

Terrible. Beats a pregnant wife? Hmm!

Why do men beat their wives? Just asking.




@me
If I tell you what will you give me?

Women and story are 5 & 6.

I'm tired.

@musa234
Why always Africa that these things like springing up?





@me
Deliverance is it an African word? When you meet mystery in life you will understand this.

Fyi white people seek deliverance too. Contact very good white pastors and you will know.

There could be fake though just like in any other call.

Pray, pray and pray....e get why

@tomilayomi
Many of us think its only when we deprived ourselves of food that's when God knows we are fasting. Fasting is a strong communion with God in spirit.

You can eat and still fast, E deep right? That's why some people will say there is white fasting where you are allowed to eat some certain kind of foods during fasting (fruits, water etc).

What matters is your closeness to your maker.



@me
You scored F9. In a public forum like this it's free for all. All manner of opinion. There is no variant in fasting. You are either fasting or you are not fasting - Hosea 4:6.

Regarding Op, he can stop his fasting, attend to his health and either continue his prayers without fasting or continue his fasting when he gets well.

Be a good in-law. If they become rich tomorrow and start helping you would you reject it?

Eat alone die alone.

@LadyRosa



Even the early papers, how many of Una dey get money /mind buy am read? No be to stand like lepers for bus stop dey argue?!



@me
Hahahaha.... you don finish us. You get mouth sha. I dey fear you. I no fit talk wetin I wan talk to you.

@LadyRosa

Call it off... Na expenses waste not the opportunity to marry a bloody liar




@me
If she becomes evening newspaper she will hate you for life oooooo.

@frozen70


See my sister, men lies by nature and defaults, they do so to save their head in some situations depending on the circumstances

Having a child before meeting you is not enough reason for you to end the marriage plans

Some men still have children or a child while even in a current marriage

So forgive him and accept his apology and continue your relationship with him

There is more lies to come and it can't be worst than the first lie

Good luck to your marriage.




@me
I don't consider what he did as a lie. So long as he was not formally married to the mother, there is no problem. He was simply having problem braking the news to you.

It's just a result of an accidental discharge in an old relationship. It happens everywhere. If all other things are in order I will advise you to go ahead.

Besides you know as country be. Husband no easy.

@Hintona

Please avoid single fathers[



@me
So men should avoid single mothers?

@Bola146


No we are glad to watch the end of the movie :



@me
Funny you

@Palema007

I concur!

He who works deserves to be fed :




@me
Deserves to be fed with what?

Tell your friend to complain to a friend that she knows that the fiance respects. The friend should summon a meeting involving the three of them and everything will be ironed out.

@Prechgold1180

Well who doesn’t like him ??
He is good looking and has money with a nice ride

Now the question is
Have you ever regretted saying no to a guy
And what will you advise my friend to do
Let go or fight for love.




@me
Fight for which love?
The girlfriend don gum body.
You think it dey easy for this Bubu time.
Person suffer get good boyfriend then one UNKNOWN GUN GIRL come snatch am. For where?

sapphiere

Hmmm. Nothing about a male is normal.




@me
Hmmm..... everything about a female is normal.