₦airaland Forum

Particularly, the thought of unknowningly raising some other fuckboy's kids should put the fear of woman in you and dump this creature you seem obsessed with.
I know her type well. She is a slave to dick. Okafor's law go too worry this type.

All those blocked guys need to do is trap her in one corner one day and whisper seductively "remember how this dick tasted when it was in your mouth that night? It needs your throat again. Your beautiful (peck) special (peck) throat" . O boy, After that one Her willpower go break and she will suck strange dick that night. Probably come back home afterwards to either kiss you or pick a fight with you because of her inability to deal with her guilt.

Guy flee unless you like drama and abuse.

SGANIVA:
if you don't ask me for money,I will be worried .is also a very big problem when you ask for things you know I can't afford.i will hate you for this. one thing for sure is that I will you provide your necessary need s . the ones I feel is not necessary, just forget about it . because am really stingy in that

This is proof that nigerian men cannot be saved.
What kind of reasoning is this?

This is the truth.

A girl you are not married to asking for money with no mention of paying back is just trying to use you to boast to her friends that you are her maga.
It's a dick measuring contest for females. It is hard Bleep-girl energy.

It is the equivalent of a guy asking a woman he hardly knows to lick his ass.
It shows they aren't even trying to impress you.
"This person looks and acts beneath me and will definitely give in to my unreasonable, disrespectful demands. If they agree, then they prove me right."

It is basically see-finish.

Nothing wrong with us both adopting if the natural way no work (God forbid)

But I will not marry a single mum. That is one thing I can't do.
We must both learn that new child together, not by 1-0 match.

spiralwedge:
A time will come, all these countries will be rushing to enter Nigeria and other African countries that they have ridiculed with their visa issuance and ridiculous English language tests.

My friend una better go and fix una country's 24/7 power and water infrastructure situation.
Until that is done, you can kiss that your scenario goodbye.

I personally do not argue with women.
Especially when I see the argument is no longer logical, but some irrational/emotional mess.

The issue comes down to how men are great at compartmentalizing.
As a man, I have opinions. But I do not attach my opinions to my psyche or emotions as unchangeable.
Opinions change, but only if a more superior logic has entered the game than the previous logic that bound that opinion to my psyche.

In an argument, if the other person can present me solid facts that irrefutably make my earlier opinion of something unfounded based on common sense, I have no issues going "Hmm. I stand corrected then" and proceed to learn something new. I don't see it as a failure for "standing corrected". I have upgraded my thought codex, and acquired more knowledge...more logic.


This is unfortunately not how most women's mind works.
For women (in stark opposition to the rules of compartmentalization)...everything is connected.

I've said before, women are not illogical.
They can be just as good at processing it as much as men.
The only thing is, women cannot process new information when their emotions are high.

The emotional side of their brain is simply stronger than the logical side, and easily over-powers the logical side.
This is why most women find it super hard to simply become calm and tend to need extra help doing so (crying, etc).
"But why should her emotions be high over a basic difference of opinion?" you ask.

A woman is more likely to attach her opinions to her emotion, so that a disagreement with her opinion is not just an assault on the "possibly obsolete" logic backing up that opinion, but it means an assault on her personally. An assault on her entire being....because everything is connected.
So the emotional side of her brain activates fight or flight mode, desperately trying to use everything it can find to win this assault i.e argument.

Sometimes it will use logic, and if logic is no longer serving its case to win the argument, it will quickly discard logic and reach desperately for something else....something that likely makes no sense. Men find it hard to do this even if we are agitated, because the logical side of our brain is still strong enough to keep emotional wahala in check (unless the man is a mental invalid)

With women, the logical side of the brain is not militant enough to fight the invasion of emotion. It is all about adrenalin and desperation and winning the argument when she is in this state.
Logic means nothing. From a brain physiological state, You are basically arguing with a drunk at that point.
Her brain cannot take in any new information in its state of civil war, so do not bother continuing to argue with her...unless you have time to waste.

Go on to do other things until her emotional flight or flight, must-win-argument-or-I-am-a-failure mode has subsided, so that the logical side of her brain can finally wrest control from the usually stronger emotional side. Then and only then can it process new logical information.
But this can only be by herself and will only happen when you, i.e the threat, is no longer in the vicinity and has gone to do something else more important with your time.

I guess pity/ATM sex is all this maga knows he can aim for, hence shit threads like this.

What you both need is a live-out maid....not a "house girl".

Because you both will not have time to be doing all that every day.

DNSPro:
it's intentional cos the on thing I wanted to change there is to make it past tense, which is "was"

If you are trying to make it past tense, then that should be "were" not "was".

2buffagain:
Paraguay and that judge should go and sit down.
They want to use them to flex.
Nobody gives a phuck about paraguay, and no one still will.

It is highly possible that these guys did not know anything about what is going on.
These WAS multi-millionaires. These things are handled for them by agencies and staff.
It is very possible that they were not parties to the issue. The agencies or "handlers" of these things should be questioned.

There is no need to put undue strain on these guys especially if they have offered to give to charity and be self-arrested.
They have NOT been proven guilty as it is still undergoing investigation so they should be put on bail till investigation subsides, not paraded around and humiliated. By all indications...The judge is just a poverty-stricken hater using the small small power he managed to have in a shit country, to feel big.

DNSPro:
FIXED... DINO is BROKE... There is every possibility that you are richer than him as we speak.

How do you "fix" someone's comment with bad grammar?
You type like an uneducated akata.

Paraguay and that judge should go and sit down.
They want to use them to flex.
Nobody gives a phuck about paraguay, and no one still will.

It is highly possible that these guys did not know anything about what is going on.
These are multi-millionaires. These things are handled for them by agencies and staff.
It is very possible that they were not parties to the issue. The agencies or "handlers" of these things should be questioned.

There is no need to put undue strain on these guys especially if they have offered to give to charity and be self-arrested.
They have NOT been proven guilty as it is still undergoing investigation so they should be put on bail till investigation subsides, not paraded around and humiliated. By all indications...The judge is just a poverty-stricken hater using the small small power he managed to have in a shit country, to feel big.

Impress them in 60 seconds. Then tell them they have 5 minutes to impress me.

KingWarri:
Quite there! E get one place where poor man no dey?

Naim make una girls turn baby Mamas.....smh

Amongst themselves they can be poor.
But if someone from a different tribe tries it, he must pay.

BYOG (Bring your own guns)

If you play Division 2, join the clan "Naija Reloaded"

Dasall

If women are ever going to be taken seriously in Nigeria, it starts with the abolishment of these excessive practices.

Naija feminists take note.
I love how quiet you all become when these topics are broached.
Una work for naija never start until you become more vocal about these matters.

If na true, then OGs like Solomon, David and Samson for Bible no for great.

OP go and build something with your life.
No be by all day one.

If you don't have a ring on it, she is not yours.
It's just your turn.
Remember this, and don't get mad if she finds a better match.

Focus on building up yourself physically, financially and mentally.
Everything else in this world will be added onto you...more than you want sef.

y3mi:
Outrageous but I'm in support.

Marriage isn't for dudes as the op has said, marriages are for men. Capable men.

I've no issue providing those items and even more provided the money is available and the love is there.

The big issue is after everything she doesn't turn out to be of another character/personality completely different from the courtship period.

However parents should ensure their daughters are raised well and very much up to standard (culturally and behaviour-ally)

Nb.
This may be far from the prenups agreement some wealthy westerner do but in a way quite similar as it ensures a lot of things that's destroying the marriage institutions.

If every tribes in Nigeria are doing this, there would be respect for married women folk as if will greatly put an halt to all those out of wedlock marriages were the lady is abused and or periodically subjected to maltreatment as the hubby believes afterall her bride price isn't paid for.

Notice how many married igbo women in are taken care of, I'm not saying all of them, I believe most. Even if the husband get indulge in extra-marital affairs, he never downgrades or subject his wife to unfairness. By the way I'm a big hater of extramarital activities.

Guy you jus dey type beans.
WTF is an out-of-wedlock marriage?
What does this ensure "like a prenup"?

Paying all this on a wife means she is now property and that will cause MORE maltreatment, not less.
Whoever still wants to beat and cheat on their wife will do so, whether or not they paid all these things.
Whoever still wants to poison and cheat on their husband will do so, whether or not they were bought like cow.

And then what happens when that family moves to the west, a place where given the laws, it is the women that are supposed to even be paying for marriage list?

Call a spade a spade and say it for what it is.
This part of igbo culture (among other parts) is bullshit and does not line up with the times.
It is a scam by hungry wretched creatures.

Seuntek:
I was in a relationship with a single mum for like 3 months, sometimes around last year. There are somethings i observed during the relationship. (1)d lady was still communicating with the father of d child (2) The child is number one and her ultimate love (3) She still love the father of the child secretly, because she will tell me some things he's good at frequently.

OP, once u are in a relationship with a single mum, u are number 2 to her and there is one thing I'm very sure of, she will still be avin sex with her ex if he's still alive.
.
Don't trade ur joy out of pity or being a good samaritan. If u can't eat it, don't smell it. Peace.

Dude, any woman who gets so disrespectful as to VERBALLY compare you with some guy she used to date, should be kicked TF out your life.
I see some wimps tolerate that shit from their women sometimes and I don't know how they allow it (maybe she pays the bills).

Even if she thinks she is joking, that's some disrespectful shit.
My view is: If the other guy was truly all that, your busted ass would still be with him, so STFU or leave.

As a man, there is a difference between adopting a child together with your wife VS your wife already having a child.
Her child is not and cannot be your child.

Even if you as a man have good mind, the fact is between herself and her child, they will always see you as an outsider.
This is evident when you try to correct that child and she becomes angry at you. It is because that is not your child, but hers.
Your job is to shut up and sponsor her and her child with your resources like the good little cuck-maga that you are.
Even if she might not see it exactly like that in her head, that is factually what it is. (Thank your God you have uncle 2Buff to give you the facts).

Now if you BOTH adopted a child that none of you gave birth to, then there is no pre-established advantage on either end.
You BOTH are freshly trying to love a child that is not yours, so there is no "us vs him" dynamic (You are not starting the match at 1-0).
As a man with a heart, I have no issues giving love to a child I did not birth...but it just can't be a child my wife gave birth to without my involvement.

You will always be an outsider in your own home, and if that child's father is alive, it is like you married into a complete family and you are just the 3rd wheel and part/full financeer of that family... too much of a sissy to go start your own family.

All of the responsibility, less of the benefits you should be entitled to.
Till today, I don't care to know who Obama's step father is (i.e the one who paid and sacrificed to raise him through Havard).
All I and most people know, is that Obama's father (the impregnator) is a Kenyan.
That is because blood is thicker than water.

The only way adoption will work smoothly is if everyone is connected by water.
One cannot be connected by blood and the other water.
Ko le werk fun mi rara.
My childless brothers, don't cheat yourself.

Basic123:
This is one of Igbo people gods






They like him like mad

Igbo people will worship anything to do with money and anyone that has it...even if it is stolen money.

Fake is never sexy

I love Oyedepo for his mouth.

Buhari is either a traitor to this country, or is just an extremely senile firgurehead.
My guess is the former.

cococandy:
Eggs scrambled with onions, tomatoes, mushrooms and sardines.

What would you eat yours with?

Where's my breakfast?

healthserve:
Forget her money. Watch her ego. There lies the truth. I've done it and I'll say to men to watch it and be very careful. Their work environment has turned them to something else. With rivalry and competition their work environment has instilled in them,pytting up with such energy on a consistent basis would mean heart attack, untimely death

Not all lose themselves anyway sha. But ego must be watched and consistently

If you notice your partner is disrespecting you because of "job energy", you should not be that much of a bitch that you cannot tell her to "keep that energy at work" and not bring it to where you live....and mean it. She will appreciate you for calling her out on it.

Some women find it difficult to compartmentalize like that because in their minds everything is connected. That's why they have you to check them and then let them know how. Balance and compartmentalization.

As to the general topic of this thread, I like that she makes all the money she can.
The best situation to be in is when monthly expenses can be covered up by one person's income so the other person's income can be used for investments, etc.

I don't see rich.

This is a bogus list as far as a lot of females are concerned

Sexyolori:
because she was getting to know him. you're don't expect her to drop such info at the first point of meeting...

Nope. That's a first date thing TBH.

In this day and age, I highly encourage people to ask "Do you have kids?" right from the first date.
There are people who are okay with you being a parent and will continue, and there are people who will end it there if its an issue for them.

Not everyone will be okay with that life configuration.
Whether it be man or woman.

madeinnigeria:
I am guessing you see those who adopt kids even after having their own as crazy. Life is not that complicated its not until you father a child biologically you can show love.

Adopting is VERY different from the unfair dynamics that already exists when stepping into a single mum situation.
The man will always be an outsider. You see that even in the OP's write up when he tries to correct the boy. That is when she reminds him that that is not his child.

So if she herself knows that, then what is the point of him still financially supporting them like a maga?

With adopting, there is no pre-existing dynamic.
BOTH parties are equally getting to know the child, much as it would be if the child was BOTH of yours.

Two very very different things here.

madeinnigeria:
So i must be a female before i can show love, have empathy towards others. When you realise a child is a child whether blood related or not you'll understand my point of view better.

Not when you get tricked into it like she did him.