₦airaland Forum

All over the world, black people suffer from something we have sadly named: The Black Tax.

The black tax is a notion born from the entitlement mentality that poor (or even lazy) family members have for the fruits of your success.
This sense of entitlement is more common in places like Nigeria where there is so much poverty in the land.

One family member who makes it is often seen as "We have made it". This is great!....but as long as you don't start seeing that sibling as "The Family Savior". If anything, that sibling making it should make for some healthy competition for you to do the same...not to be a leech. It is a mind switch you must be mindful of.

Add to it the fact that most african parents have no understanding of the concept of birth control and the problem compounds.
If you are not wealthy, do you really need 4 or more children? Why use your children to become a burden on someone else's neck? (even if that burdened person ends up also being one of your children who manages to make it).

There is nothing I hate more than some entitled family member trying to estimate the income and expense of another family member as to why the person cannot even give them money sef. That your "savior" is a salary earner for some fancy sounding company does not mean he is wealthy or even rich. That your "savior" made some money does not mean he/she does not have plans for said money.

I find most Nigerians lack financial education.
Someone making money does not mean it must be eaten right away, and it certainly does not mean it must be eaten by YOU.
Go and understand what compound interest is.

I just read a thread about someone complaining about how their brother does not want to pick their calls any more. This ofcourse he also blamed on the brother's wife along with further amebo noise about her not knowing how to cook etc (gossip). I just read that thread shaking my head because this is the same deluded person wondering why the brother wants nothing to do with them.

I find that siblings with this same evil tendency, who happen to also have a generous "savior" siblings start to get jealous and start causing trouble for the savior's fiance before that person can get to become the savior's spouse, just so that they can continue to be the main beneficiary of the savior's generousness. This is why it is good to always create that boundary as early as possible so that no one in your family starts to get it twisted.

To those who still think like this...renew your mind and your hussle.
How you fare in life is NOT your sibling's responsibility.
Their responsibility is to their nuclear family (spouse + kids) and your parents (within reason).
That's it.
Everything else is as a result of their grace to you....not your entitlement . Meditate upon the difference.

This thread makes me want to sell my land in Nigeria and forget that country even exists.

Too many shit-for-brains in that country.
Somebody left his comfortable established life in New York to come fight for your freedom and is now in jail for it, yet see what some of you are saying?

It's like all the people capable of rational thought have left that country and all you now have are morons.

What a pig sty of a country.

And to address the absolute fools talking about Sowore voted Buhari... Have you not been voting leaders in for the past 20 years of your lives? Have each and every one of them not ended up being disappointments? So by the very same virtue of your words, YOU should also be in jail because you happen to have chosen wrong leaders. Measure yourself with the same yardstick you are using to measure others.

Sowore decided to do the only brave thing left, which is to try to run for office himself as the best position to move that country forward. And the man is suffering for his bravery, selflessness and LOVE for YOU and YOUR FUTURE... And this is the best way you gutter slurping, shit eating cretins repay that.

This is a Jesus and Jerusalem situation all over again.

Mine is that, for all those condemning Sowore, it seems you desire for you and your children to never enjoy the renewed modern Nigeria that Sowore and others like myself envision. You are making a prayer that you and your seed continue to squalor in degeneration and shit eating. This is not a curse. It is only a statement of fact by virtue of your mindset as revealed in this thread.

Leoniine:
Now, this is the part I don't like. Invalidation or dismissal. While hiding behind some obscure veneer. How all my talk take be beans? I don't call your opinions bullshit, do I?

Explain to me how it showed me to be selfish!!!! Like, dude, did you read my post, did you? Selfishness, seriously?

Heavy debt? Please, make your question clearer. What kind of debt? Monetary? In what context or situation? Because my brain is coming up with so much possibilities here. I thought up an NGO scenario. And I imagined when I'll be financially comfortable.

You talk too much. Answer simple question.

Can you empty your retirement account for that child that is not yours in the case of an emergency?

1Sharon:
Lol whites and Asians rule the world because they are innovative. Blacks are irrelevant in the grand scheme of things because we are primarily a consumer group

An unfortunate and dispassionate truth.

We have more consumers than generators, be that in things or jobs... Most black people are more concerned about consuming and "keeping things as they are because that is how ancient people did it" as opposed to generating or innovation.

It goes back to the way culture is worshipped, no matter how backward. Culture is nice, but all it is is peer pressure from dead people. It should never out-trump pragmatism.

Now even if you want to be about culture, I invite the black person to meditate upon Japanese culture and why it is so wide spread. How it is propagated in high enviable quality via media like anime and video games. Till date, we don't even have a world renown video game or animation outlet of said culture. Everything about blacks is backward, not forward.

Always backward.
Till today there are some blacks somewhere that instead of setting their mind on what they want today and going for it, still prefer to cry/complain/blame white people's ancestors for things...yet love in a place that most black people in the world would do anything to get into so they can finally manifest destiny.

That's what happens when you lose the war of civilization. I am mature enough to accept that we lost that one. I need not beef white people about it. In anything, to the Victor goes the spoils. We were venerating idols and Savage shit and fighting with melee weapons while our competitors were fighting with science and guns. The average black run civilization till today, has no sense of research and scientific development. Just keep everything as they are and hope you're still relevant 100 years from now kinda thinking.

Today there are only 2 types of white people: the evil and the guilt-ridden. Thankfully the latter now out number the former.

Most blacks are risk averse, thankfully we have some exceptions.

Equity15:
what tallesty1 and some other said here is the absolute truth which I have witnessed. single mother give priorities to thier child. everything revolves around that child, even when in r/ship with them, they'll keep asking money for upkeeps of the child from you like it's your responsibility. and however you like you deny it, they always have that connection/soft spot for the baby daddy. though maybe it's not all of them. but all the ones I have met so far are like that. please think very well about your decision.

There is no way a man will be in a relationship with a woman that money will not leave his hand for something for her. Directly or indirectly, that cuckold maga will pay for the impregnator's child.... And I can never be convinced to agree to be a cuckold maga. At least not while I am still a young virile man with my legacy on my mind!

Not my child. Not my responsibility.
Such considerations are for old men in their twilight years.

Lol at all the single mothers in thread trying hard to validate their existence and maintain market value in their mind.

If I was a woman with that kind of baggage, I guess I'd do the same to prevent conc. depression. These mental acrobatics and cognitive dissonances is why women benefit the most from therapy and daily complements. Y'all have to receive and tell yourselves so many damn lies just to get by without a mental breakdown.

If you are a single mother, deep down, you know say your market don cast!

Leoniine all that your talk is beans and showed you to be even more selfish.

After all the words I ask you this simple question, Can you go into heavy debt for a child that is not your own?

lilwetdick:
sowore aka sowere is an idiot.

he is no freedom fighter, he is just disturbing the peace, nothing he says is relevant

this is the man that contested for election and lost woefully then wants a revolution because he didnt win

And Fvck you

bewla:
U better quite be for we add another count charge

Fvck you...

lefulefu:
not my friend biko ..but a friend to my friend.u think i will still make friends with someone if i found out he"s dating a girl who previously dated a drug dealer or a cultist? .that a lady was dating a drug dealer is enough to tell me the type of lady she is nau.i hundred percent agree with u dat the guy is a mega fool because ladies who are used to dating thugs dont need a nice guy.u will only be nice to them at ur peril .the most that pained the guy was that he was the one paying for the lady"s son"s school fees in primary school and buying his books and never once did the lady appreciated his efforts.i just siddon put hand for jaw as i dey hear d story.

Experience is the best builder of character.
E go sabi game by force.

Leoniine:
what do you mean @bolded?

And you based your thoughts on a lot of assumptions and "what its." So, it's very possible for them to be ruled out. Not apply.

You're leaving out a lot of factors. Things can go in the positive direction or otherwise. Don't fixate on things (likely) going bad. You cannot tell the relationship between the single mother and her ex. And neither can you judge the current relationship she's in...

Do, pray tell, enlighten us on what "positives" could come out of a situation like this.

lefulefu:
anyway if u want to date one its very important u study her .my friend was telling me an issue about one of his colleagues who was dating a single lady who lost her ex in south africa to some drug deal went wrong.from day 1 the lady started giving him issues and no matter how he proved her love to her she never showed any appreciation.it was the guy sponsoring her son in school and she was still cheating on him and broke shaming him.bros had to run for his life .

Your friend was a fool.

You have to mercilessly vet women before they even have a chance to enter and fvck with your life.
If a girl was dating a drug dealer, that tells me exactly what kind of girl she is based on her choice of man, and what mental blueprint she has been imprinted with.
A woman who is used to the drug dealer man life is not, in any way, suited for relationship with normal brothers.
Especially if she is the jobless type who has no means of legitimate income and was pampered all the way through.

A woman like that is used to being dominated and negotiating with hyper-aggressive types of men, so someone like that will not give a normal man peace. In their mind, one person needs to be aggressive, and if it isn't you its her...and she will hate you for that. E.g Women with that imprint need a man who will slap them if they step out of line and who won't be weak to them. They won't even report it to police (in the west where they worship women in court) if they get beaten, because they secretly like that shit. That is her comfort zone.

Women like that love punishment. And if you don't give it to her, she will give it to you.

Leoniine:
And it's not likely for women who aren't single mothers to sleep with their exes?

The difference is, if all goes well, childless women won't have to see their exes all the time and the ex has no legitimate reason of coming to where she lives.

But in the case of single mums, if all goes well, they have to see their exes in their living space quite frequently and also interact with them about an element of their conjoinment (aka the child) every single time. Everytime she sees that child, she remembers the dick that put it in her and he is always there, and both ex and child are always there, refreshing that memory so it cannot be a distant and forgotten memory.

This triggers unneccesary memories, and before you know whats up, she might just prove herself a fool maybe when she and her main maga are arguing.

lyndaway:
The last time I checked single mother is not a disease if you love her and you are sure she loves you too why not go ahead she didn't choose to be a single mother she just find her self in situation that is beyond her control if you love her go ahead

Typical female response.
Ofcourse you want some man to be there to take you in after you have taken all the dicks you want to and created babies for other men, so what else will you say again?

The man's ROI be damned. Maga format abi?

Single motherhood = misplaced loyalty.
She is loyal to HER family that has already been started with some other man. NOT you.

Simple!

You as a constantly sacrificing man will never have even the tiniest priority.
And you will have little ROI for your efforts as that child is not a derivative of your seed or lineage.
And you are faced with the lifetime humiliation of always having the guy who first impregnated your wife always showing up in your house and looking at you in the eye.

Why would any childless man of high self worth tolerate all that rubbish?

Most single mothers learn that they simply must have a bangin body, but that is just to attract men who cannot see past a bangin body i.e men of low self worth. Her having a bangin body only earns her dick. It does not earn her a ring.
If that woman cannot give you priority, as a single mum cannot because her priority is her child, then she does not deserve you in your untethered prime.

That stuff only works when you as a man also has a child.
That way you can both de-prioritize each other equally and together for the sake of your children.

I bet that stank pussied slowpoke with the handle "Anele" feels like a fool right now.

The best way to impress a girl is to NOT concern yourself about impressing her.

Going down the road of "trying to impress" woman....is a slippery slope.
Their desire for pointless material things knows no bounds.

Damn....

That's that Chun Li thicc alright.

pappy2000:
I need to start this write up that i met this lady early this year and i had another lady who from my analysis is not so much in love with me so when i finally met this lady, she was everything i desire in a woman, so we started dating and from dating i went to see her sister in Abuja then from Abuja i went to kogi to meet her parent.

I met her family late June 2019. So I work in a blue chip company with a salary of little more than 100k so but i realized the salary won't make me live my dream life so i took a loan from gtbank to buy a car and use for e hailing.

My fiancee was so much supportive that she on her own decided to add like 200k fund so i bought a toyota matix.

So when I gave out the car the people i gave it to were all misbehaving so i decided that i will drive the car, she was so cool and nice that she will do everything at my beck n call.

Now when i went to meet her sister in Abuja her sister insists that we should pick a date meanwhile in may when we were marking her birthday, she told me how sad she was due to the fact that she was marking her birthday and she is getting younger so i promise her then that we will marry this year. I told her in Novermber so we finally settle for a date and the sister spent her money.

Unfortunately for me things were not as i planned in the uber biz, i need a few repair here and then. Now we got days left to wedding and she has been very irrational. She is pregnant for me, each time she visits me, i will beg her, na the cry and cry. How I truly want a happy home.

There is nothing "irrational" about her behavior. It's actually understandable.
Na you dey Bleep up.
Of course she feels used. You set wedding date with a woman, but it's not looking like you are going to come through.

Add to the fact that you have also done the stupid thing of giving her belle, if you were to cast her now, na she go loose for una matter. So she is just finally applying logic to the matter, and logic demands she be wary and somewhat angry.

The girl wey refuse this pastor na wicked gehl sha.
Very wicked gehl!
Sistah, Can't you see he is in SIFIA PAINS?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBhCvw-kUgo

That's just fetishization.
I recommend your friend WAITS until he hits his 30s first before thinking about marriage to women that older than him.
The 35+ year old woman that might look good today, will not look the same in 4 years.
Sometimes, all it takes is 1 year for sissy to turn into aunty

Only in his 30s can he have the full mental spectrum needed to make such a permanent decision if "older women" is still the path he wants to walk.

Ilekokonit:
There is NOTHING spiritual about mental illness. My Professor of Medicine went through something similar at UI Medical School back then and after in patient treatment at the psychiatric unit at UCH for a month for bipolar affective disorder or manic depression he became VERY well and went back to lecturing in UI Medical School.

In civilised societies mentally I'll people are NOT shamed but well looked after by their Government and mental illness there is as common as the common cold and is NOTHING spiritual and it depends on your INHERITED genes, lifestyle choices e.g. lack of sleep which can trigger it from dormancy and the general stresses of daily living etc which is why Prince Harry of England can openly admit that he suffers from Mental Health Issues.

Instead of assisting the EXTREMELY vulnerable and I'll lady in getting to the nearest PSYCHIATRIC hospital, that are ignorantly dragging her down from a PICK-UP TRUCK so that passers by can ridicule, taunt and abuse the clearly troubled lady whose ONLY CRIME is to succumb to an illness the high and mighty in CIVILISED countries succumb to ON A DAILY BASIS.

Illiteracy is really a disease.

We in Nigeria need to move away from STINKING THINKING.

The real answer is...it depends O.

There are people who ALL their kids are mentally ill. All 2,3,4 of them. That one is not matter of chance or medicine.

Those black girls are trying very hard to look happy, but they are not.
They. are. FURIOUS

Many bowls of ice-cream will be pigged on that night.

NwaAmaikpe2nd:
Are men created this way.

Anytime they see a pretty lady,all what will be on their minds is how to bang her.

A man can buy what he doesn't need from a lady or buy something precious that ordinarily he can't buy for his mum for a pretty lady he just met.

Even me a man has promise to buy me a plane ticket and finance my travel and the funny thing is we just met the first time in church,that was 4 years ago.

Are men created this way?

Just asking.

lalasticlala
mynd44
dominique
ishiluv
joslas
nwayiokpa
nwayiawkaetiti
lucifer
sarki
Victoria puegeren

All that one na banging things.

It doesn't mean we don't think far and do looong mathematics when it comes to who we marry as a wife.
Unfortunately a lot of women don't have access to the feedback loop of "unattracted" male wisdom or men in the family...especially in the west.
So the women could end up focusing on being fuckable and totally disregard the other aspects and personality virtues that the serious side of that man is scanning for in a wife.

That's how they will become old and be wondering why no man has put a ring on it. She thought all she needed to be successful in life with men was the puccy.

Kryzboy:
no she wasn't , she is just a lady with dick

Dis guy, I dey suspeeet you.

This your logic be like say you dey reason am like you no go mind suck dick and balls, as long as na person wey dress like woman dey dangle am give you.

I just find it funny how these transformer men still have mind to be listing requirements for other men like tall, handsome, rich, etc.

Because real woman looking for those exact same qualities don finish abi?

If there is one thing that will make many women end up in hell, it is their trademark unforgiveness over basic things.
"You sneezed near me!...cold shoulder",
"You touched my hair!...cold shoulder"
"You yelled at me for being dumb and annoying!...cold shoulder", etc.
You as a man should not care so deeply about that.

It is all manipulation and control....2 things you should not fall prey to with women.

hezy4real01:
Theirs more to this... How can u get someone to stand for u and u turn it off

My brother,

It is not every gift that is offered to you that you take, neither is it every food offered to you that you eat.
You must first consider the motive behind the gift.
This is the very basis of corruption....something anybody who has not been blinded by political blood sacrifices can see that Sowore wants nothing to do with.

Love her but don't care so much...

The worst thing a man can do to himself when it comes to women...is care too much.
You simply become easy to manipulate.

It is also not every question she asks you that you should bother answering.
When you sense her trying to serve up bullshit, do not partake. Let her simmer in it alone...she will eventually realize that she is being foolish.

That, or she will leave, neither of which should concern you.

Nigerians...

Any Nigerian that insults Sowore, a man fighting for your freedom, your mindset right now is the result of several blood sacrifices that have been done to make it so. To make you the conc., illogical MUMU you are today.

If after reading this, you still carry on with your MUMU mindset, then you are a willing participant of said blood sacrifices.
May you receive the same punishment as those that did them.