₦airaland Forum

OK.
I'm not the man's lawyer or anything.
But...
I believe in balance.
I believe in CAUSE and EFFECT


Could it be that the man's wife is very stubborn?

Could it be that he nags(thank god you didn't say beat) his wife all the time because she likes doing things her own way without listening to him?

Could it be that the reason he has been threatening to divorce her despite having 4kids(boys and girls) for him is because of her stubbornness?

Could it be that he has warned her several times not to overuse the water, that fuel is costly and she should be economical but she repeatedly refuses to listen?

And then after this last episode the man got angry and in a bid to reprimand her he told her he won't pump water for 2days out of anger? And then walked out of the house?(because if he was still in the house she wouldn't have stubbornly come to collect gen from you and pump water successfully)

People who don't bath after a day smell horribly. Also like you said they need water for cooking and feeding. And there are kids involved. I don't think he meant to enforce the punishment. Could it be he said so in the heat of anger, walked out to calm himself knowing fully well he wouldn't carry out his threat, only to return a few hours later to see that wife had stubbornly challenged him once again? And this now led to his driving her out of the house in a fit of rage?

You see how many 'could it be's? can enter this story of yours, thus making it not so one sided?

3cycle: His apprentice lives with him (nwa boyi) and takes the responsibility of making his oga cmfortable. His apprentice could buy water for him to use. A bucket of water is 20naira

Secondly he Has a LIVE IN HOUSeHELP and the son is not little because he is in secondary school (JS2) the last two are 5 and 6yrs old and the help can take care of them

And lastly she stubbornly came to ask for my gen cos she needs water to cook for her children and to bath too.

OK so now we have two new characters. The apprentice and the house help. Are you saying he wasn't going to let them have their bath as well? What would have been the logic, that he's punishing them too cos of what wife did?

Also wouldn't he have to eat too? And drink water too? He would have drank water while his wife and kids died of thirst?

Do you honestly believe he would have sent his boy to buy N20 bucket of water when he can easily pump his own?

So he punished the ENTIRE household because his wife used up all the water?

Hmn...

This story...

I dunno o....

If he refused her pumping water into the house, is he not going to stay in the same house? Doesn't that mean he isn't going to have water to bath too and is in essence punishing himself as well?

Also what man will drive a woman and the leave 4kids who are little(from your explanation, the oldest child should be 12?) to take care of by himself? No be more work for him be dat? Once again won't he have to bath them?

And if she is so weak minded how come she stubbornly came to borrow your gen?


This your story doesn't sound true to me o,

Or if its true you are not saying everything but painting it in such a way that we pity your 'confidant'

Just my thoughts sha.

ifyalways: The name of the girl I found for you.

You people are going to spoil this boy

Zboyd:Albinism doesn't carry the same type of stigma over here that it does in Nigeria.

However, albino kids are sometimes teased in school and, as they get older are a bit shunned in the dating area.

Please oh, albinism doesn't carry any special stigma here in Nigeria. Its the same teasing in school and shunning in the dating area that they experience over there that they experience here. If anything they are treated with kindness(pity?)here, and because of that many of them like to prove themselves. Thank you.

cococandy: The gene for albinism is a recessive one so wherever it occurs alongside the normal gene for melanin production,it will always be over shadowed by the gene for color which is the dominant.
It only finds expression where it occurs alone meaning that for that paritcular offspring to show phenotypic expression of albinism,the both gametes that met at the point of fertilization each carried the genes for albinism.

So he should stop asking if she has albinos in her lineage. The answer is that both of them do have the recessive genes for albinism.
He may never have known anyone in his family with the condition probably because non of them ever mated with anyone who had the recessive gene too.
Now he has and here's the result.
His next kids could be normal colored too.

The only other condition which can give rise to this is a mutation(very very rare too)


I feel greatly pained when I see 'educated' people make such discriminatory remarks against others.

And @zboyd
So from my understanding of what you and efemenaxy explained, the albinism gene is like the sickle cell gene. Being 'autosomal recessive' it requires both partners to give the child the disease. Interesting.

I've learnt something new.

I changed my mind, maybe you should let the man know about this, at least he'll know its not entirely the woman's fault.

Having said so, I still feel the man is within his rights to ask if the women had albinoes in their family or not. Everybody is entitled to what they like and what they do not like and it feels like betrayal if the man asked her and she knowingly withheld the information from him. Just as some people do not want sicklers as children although they can be well managed, others do not want albinoes and its attendant peculiarities.
I believe they are prone to eye defects and skin cancers, I'll Google it up.
The angle I'm coming from here is that the woman may have kept the information from the man, hence his drastic and bizzaire action. Else I have never heard of a mam disowning his own kids just because they are albinos.

Hello all,
Just finished watching Godzilla and I give it a 7/10. It would have been a better movie if they had shown more monster action instead of leaving everything to the last 7mins of the film (which was totally awesome, but still...). Also I didn't find myself being emotionally attached to any of the characters. The main guy would have died and I couldn't have cared less. In fact, the only character I was interested in seeing was 'Godzilla' itself and they kept on showing him screaming and growling but not doing any real fighting until the very end.
All in all a good monster movie, great to watch with a crowd in the cinema but leaves me wondering if they couldn't have done some things better.

joella1: @5mins,
I can surely discuss the techniques(my flame/fling told me about it)..it didn't do nothing for us, it may be beneficial to someone going through the same thing.. Its nothing fantastic or groundbreaking.
1. Doubling up on condoms to reduce friction.
2. Stopping for a while(while still caressing some other erogenous zones like the bosoms and inner ear lobes etc) when the momentum builds up so it can be prolonged.

Doubling up on condoms will not only reduce the friction but it will reduce the pleasure for him as well. He might as well masturbate into the condoms. That wasn't a good idea for someone with this problem.

Stopping for a while is a good idea. How many times did you try this? Were you patient with him? Did he know the 'stopping for a while' was because of his 'issue'? If yes he might be anxious when he mounts you again and will still release quickly.

Pls I humbly suggest you read through my posts again. Take your time. Save the page and read it at leisure if you must. Once you get the general idea and put it to practice I'm sure it will work.
Thanks.

joella1: @5mins,
I initially didn't plan to make any more reponses but since you are trying to help out a stranger with your time and you are not preachy or judgy,I must respond.

It has never been up to par(I feel that was why he needed an inexperienced person & I'm not knocking him for it, would do same in his position), I knew cos I read a lot and have friends who are very open, I just assumed there was a bit of exaggeration in all the tales I hear. My fling/flame opened my eyes to another world entirely!!! I even tried to use that to spice up our relationship by "tellingl him I learnt the tricks from my naughty friends.

What tricks? Can you comfortably discuss them here?

And he is not stressed in any way, he doesn't drink cos alcohol and coffee don't agree wiith him, if he drinks a bit of wine socially, he develops a headache.
If you spontaneously wake him up late night or early morning, he will plead with you to just free him,not cos he is stressed but cos he just loves to sleep. We do have fast one on occasions but its not a novelty cos its not new.

Ok.
OK.
Don't wake him spontaneously since he likes his sleep. I mentioned that before.
Fast ones where? A fast one in the bedroom is not a quickie. A quickie is urgent and passionate. Usually takes place when one least expects it e.g kitchen, bathroom, corridor while guests are in the parlour(don't ask)

We do have a great relationship save for this "small" & "big" problem, don't put him down, don't even discuss it with anyone. That's the main reason I brought it here. Here we are all faceless and you get served appropiately.

Ok

I was only irritated cos he commented on my dropping of my "act". I know he has sought help(even used medications and therapy) and he feels like that should be enough for me..I'm human!! Part of why I stopped the pretence was to help him get better.
He wants me to continue to hail the 3/10 like its 12/10 and was just tired of doing that.. He feels it shouldn't matter to me and I should be more considerate & go with the flow cos he is putting in his all.

I guess this is the crux of the matter it must have really pissed you off. On behalf of him, sorry.

In a nutshell, it doesn't last and can't be revived till after some hours without medication, and it still doesn't last despite the medication as well!!

Do not use medication. It has not come to that and using medication suggests to him that he has a medical problem which he doesn't.

Personally I want to see how this ends.
Op it will be well, înúgo?
Waiting for 5pm.
@pickabeau1 bro how far Na!

cococandy: I thought so too but he explained it.
Duh
You're a late comer.

Still sounds fake to me
Sorry about this ladies but...
What kind of man whines so much like this?
And do you notice how he keeps centering the story around himself like he's the star?
Three ladies have directly insulted him and his response was 'thank you' like he was relishing the insult. When aisha2 used pepper tongue to fire him and someone stood up for him he quickly followed suit.
Three pages of me me my as if he's trying so hard to paint how bad he is so we can start squabbling over his deeds. Haba
Its HERPES! What's all the panic about? Kids get herpes in school when they play with other kids and their teachers! If he really read about it he should have gotten this information, why is he jumping up and down as if he has contracted Ebola?
Someone mentioned his tale would be more interesting if it was HIV and now suddenly we are all awaiting HIV test Eveny genius Aisha come dey console am

Well, like I said before its a good story with good lessons to learn about the ills of infidelity. Its just that I think the story was written by a woman

wolewill: Good day Nairaland

To crown it all now, I need to go for HIV test to be sure I am not in bigger trouble than I am. right now my wife is in the kitchen preparing break fast while I type this, but I cant help but look back and wail over how I have destroyed the lives of all the people that trusted, believe and genuinely care for me with my selfish acts.

Interestingly my wife keeps practicing her house hygiene without knowing that the greatest threat to her hygienic life is her husband, I kept looking at the situation as she go about her finicky hygiene lifestyle, she is so finicky to the extent that the children cannot come into the living room with their pyjamas in the morning and sit on the couch there because visitors also sit on them and she doesn't want them to pick anything from strangers cloth thereby getting into their bed with.

wolewill: @mrbrownjay. Naturally I am not wont to this behaviour but for the fact that I work away from my family though not excuse to behave badly. I need to confess to my wife but I need to be around her and I am not due for leave anytime soon

.

blank: Who is deceiving whom?


Can's stand all these fake Nollywood stories abeg.

[size=15pt]BUSTED[/size]
The whole story sounded fake jo! I won't be surprised if the op is actually a female trying to teach males some morals with her story!

Finally...

YOU.

Yes you! You cannot solve a problem if you think it cannot be solved. Nothing is impossible if you don't stop to think about it!

Many Nigerians are like this. They tell you a problem and when you start offering solutions they tell you why the solution WON'T work. We are extremely negative as a people, maybe that's why we are still where we are.
If you want to solve this problem you have to set aside two things:
1. The blame mentality. Its not my fault, its his fault. This is the bane of all problems whether business or marriage. It might make you feel good declaring that the fault is not from you so therefore there is nothing you can do about it; but that won't solve the problem. And you want the problem solved. Don't you?

2. I've done it already mentality. No you haven't. Yeah you tried it once 5years ago and it didn't work so there! You've done your part. No you haven't. The guy that said 'if at first you don't succeed, try, try again' was very wise. You prosper by repetition. You excel by repitition.

Nobody is putting you under a spotlight, nobody is blaming you. But its your husband. Its your marriage. Its your decision toake it work. Do it for him and it will eventually be done for you!

Adultry isn't a good thing. Your ex is married and you don't know the compsure of his wife. You don't k ow what they are going through in their marriage. If you go back to this ex you stand the chance of
Ruining your marriage
Ruining his marriage
Contacting diseases
Being attacked by the wife(I've seen it happen. Acid was involved.)
Carrying the guilt with you
Etc.

Or you may not get caught. Who knows? Its a free world. But the whole adultery thing looks a bit risky toe though.


Be Oga's seductress. Be his teacher in this field, I'm sure he has been your teacher in other fields. Be patient with him as he has been with you in other areas. That's what marriage is all about.

Stay blessed.

6. He doesn't watch porn. Good. Porn makes a man selfish. It makes him want to go straight to the point and forget about fore-play. This in turn makes the woman feel like an object. Porn is bad for sin. es and worse for couples. Its a plus for him that he doesn't watch porn.
7. He doesn't take alcohol. Sista, you sure say Oga no be pastor? Haba talk true o, make e no be say you wan make I spoil man of God oh!
Anyway he's your husband, so.
Too much alcohol can reduce sexual performance. A little alcohol can enhance it. Its good he doesn't drink, at least it means he is not pot-bellied(hopefully!)
8. If sleep is very very important to him then he must be a man stressed! If he is stressed out most of Tue time and wants to catch up on sleep, madam don't disturb him! Wait until the weekends or public holiday. Let sex be an event. Tell him you have fixed a time for you guys to have sex, make sure that time is free from hassle and he has eaten(but not something like EBA or AKPU if not he will just pass out) and is relaxed. Let him know you are the one in charge and make sure it doesn't encroach on his sleep time.
You didn't say he has issues with getting hard. Hopefully he doesn't cos that one is a different approach.
Also try and break sex from the routine of nights. When last did you guys have an official quickie? I know he doesn't last long so quickies are not new to you but I mean real quickie As in he finds you in the bathroom and rushes a fast one before going to work?
Who is laughing there? Its very possible! In this case you'll have to initiate stuff like that. Itay not end in sex the first time you try it. You may rush in and loss him and grab something etc etc enough for him to get hard and when he complains that he's late, laugh mischeviously do it some more(I don't want to be overly explicit) and then leave the bathroom. He may draw youback to finish what you started or he may go to work but iI bet you he'll be hurrying to come back and finish it when work is over.
This is a good alternative to the 'helping himself one hour before sex' that you researched on. Hana, Na robot him be? Why embarrass him with that kind of info as if he needs help?(we all know he needs help but making it obvious like that doesn't help!)
By the time you guys have the quickie in the morning then evening or afternoon or running out of the car to 'deal with you' before heading to work will definitely last longer.

9. Has been addressed. More stressful work means less meaningful sex.
10. Has to do with his idea of sexuality. So its not like he was sexually naive before marrying you. Noted.

11. You corrected him in the process of having sex? Bad. Bad bad BAD!! Very bad of you. You have destroyed his ego.
Men do not like being assessed during sex; unless its a good assessment. If you are not screaming 'oh shola my king! My sweetie! You are soooo big! Don't tear me oh ! Yeeeh, ejo!' Or something of like manner please keep quiet. If you say things like 'I can't feel you, do it well naaaah, this your thing is too small, have you entered?, etc etc' then don't be surprised if the sex ends disastrously soon after. Many females have avoided being raped by laughing at the size of their attackers. Of course saying such things can also elicit more beating but let's not change the subject.

As from today if you want your sex life to improve you have to become an actress. You have to resurrect that his sex.u0al ego. No more 'do it like this, do it like that.' Instead if he touches you right you must squirm in pleasure. If he massages a place properly say 'ooh that's it honey, you sure know how to make me feel goood.'
Don't laugh. Its for your own good. Your husband has to vet his confidence back in this area. Nothing he does again is bad, if it sweets you 3/10, move as if it sweet you 10/10. This willake him more confident and want to do those things more! And you will benefit in the end!

One thing though. Make sure he doesn't fall into a routine. If he knows touching your left breast makes you scream in pleasure , he may not want to leave there again. If you notice something like that, let him realise all the other places are just as pleasurable for you e.g 'honey that's so sweet, please do the other other one like that' etc.

Please note that this entails for all men, not only African men. All men have huge sexual egos or none at all. Its better for you for your husband to have his sexual ego intact. Na you go enjoy am pass. That's how single ladies get married men out of their homes. Simple massaging of their ego and they are putty in your hands.

Finally....

alutacontinua: Don't spray no perfume on your vagina, biko
#team don't alter down below's pH#
Water is the most important, if not the only cleanser you need.


@5minsmadness, fire on, I dey feel you

btw, your madness don dey reduce to 5 seconds these days oo

Corrected! Not inside but on the surface where the shaved hair previously was! Thanks for the observation

edwife: 5minsmadness,very good tips you have here.

I am impressed.

Thanks. I dey work so I go dey drop am small small

3. Not surprised that you replied missionary mostly in this one. This is the most common position for a 'lets get it over with' sex life. Sorry but that's your fault. Why stay in one place? Do you know the missionary position is the quickest way for a guy to ejaculate? Why, you ask?

In the missionary position the man's focus is mainly on your vagina. He is supporting himself on his hands and knees while drilling the woman who by the way is just lying there 'like a log of wood'. Most times if its a pot-bellied or fat man the woman feels compressed and can't move. The man requires extra effort to free one hand to handle madam's breasts or maybe to take a break to lean forward and kiss her but otherwise its 'drill-drill-drill-pop champagne" and everybody goes to sleep.

Its boring, but its a great way to have kids. Also since the man focuses more on drilling he will definitely pop faster.

Your man by now will be too scared to change the routine by himself. You can take the initiative and do it. When he has drilled to some extent push him off and move to other positions, preferably starting with the 'woman-on-top'. This has numerous advantages.

A. The change in position will pause his tempo and increase the time it will take for him to pop.

B. When you are on top you do most of the work. This will give Oga time to 'rest' thus in turn giving him more stamina.

C. You are the one in charge so you know how to move to achieve better pleasure.

D. Oga has better access to you breasts, tummy, legs. While he is caressing you, your pleasure increases. When he sees you excited he will be like 'hey, she's enjoying this!' And this in turn will excite him. So you both win.

E. When you feel he wants to pop, you can get off and caress and kiss him until the feeling comes down then start again.
This by itself will improve your sex life tremendously. On to the next one.


4. Has been taken care of by you. Be adventourous for him! He will learn to follow suit.

5. You have said he enjoys MouthAction being done on him, so he doesn't see it as a taboo. So why doesn't he do it on you?
Well, why should he? Let's turn the tables round a little. Do you take time to wash down there very well? Can youbeat your cheat and say it doesn't smell? What about hair, when last did you shave? Does he encounter stringy multicoloured hair when he visits your honeypot?
Men love dishwashing we really do. The only thing that puts us off is the look or smell of the place. Have you as a lady ever had a guy go down south on you, past your belly button, down, down, and then suddenly pause and start coming up again with style? Its because he met a roadblock of some kind. For some guys its hair. For most guys its the smell.

The Indian women who partook in the Kamasutra actually had a ritual before they engaged in 0ral sex. They would bathe themselves and then stand over sweet smelling incense for one hour. By the time they met their lords that place will be smelling like a flower.

Today you don't need to stand for an hour. Simply have your bath and spray with perfume or preferably a mild doedorant and you are ready. Please note you are not spraying into your vagina! Wash inside with clean water and then spray the surface with a gentle deodorant. Shave completely, let it be smooth as a baby's bottom. That's has two advantages:
A. Most men get aroused when you shave down there. It shows neatness and thoughtfulness. It also makes us feel you like sex and that's a turn on for any man, spirokoko or not.
B. Most guys identify your privates with the Hairy border. Its like a roadblock. If there's no roadblock he has no official place to stop, he'll keep going down until he reaches the promised land without even knowing it.

Now he has a reason to go down on you. But he won't do it cos its been a long time or he feels angry he has to do it before you do him (the condition you gave him) etc etc. This is where positions come into play. This is a dance and you are taking the lead. 69 him. While you are doing that its only natural for him to smell your sweet scent and wonder what else he can do with that place.
Brb

HIM

He is a reluctant lover. That could be from a number of things including his spiritual upbringing, his age and his poor performance.
You have said it on more than one accession that he is the 'spirikoko' type. You must have known this before you got married in fact it must have been one of the main reasons why you married him in the first place i.e responsible, faithful, etc. You honestly don't expect such a person to be a swx maniac, he will definitely be conservative.

Its true men's libido decreases with age (from 45 onwards) but that is no excuse for your sex life to go to the pits. The thing is to make sure he is actually physically fit to increase his sexual appetite. Does he have a stressful job? When last did thetl two of you take some time off and go on a vacation? In Nigeria going on a vacation can mean leaving the kids with a family member for a weekend while you guys spend it at that new hotel that opened up near your house. No stress of family work for you, no stress of office work for him, just room service, ac tight room with 24hrs light and a swimming pool and gym at your disposal! This change in itself can bring about a marked increase in his libido. You guys have been married 16yrs, have you taken time out for a second honeymoon?

Still on age, does he have any chronic illness? E.g back pains, waist pains, hypertension, diabetes? If yes are they under control? Does he struggle with back pain while knocking you in the missionary position? It would be no wonder he's just interested in getting it over with as soon as possible and if he isn't fit or is unduly stressed he won't have the stamina for round 2 or 3 or 4.
Get him to see a doctor and do a fitness test. Just to make sure everything is running fine.

Poor performance. Once again you married him like this and so shouldnt be too surprised that he is the way he is. But I'm guessing after 16yrs you are tired of the whole thing and want to feel some real power between your legs! Nothing wrong in that! It will happen but like I told the guy who was complaining about his wife, you'll have to be patient. It will happen but not all the time too but that in itself is a good thing. It makes it all the more special when it happens.

His Discouragements and encouragements
1. Two to three times a month for a working couple isnt bad. How many times a month do you want it? Do you have time for it?
2. Men HATE to have to ask their wives for sex. I repeat, men hate to have to ask their wives for sex. Its a whole different ballgame from when you were boyfriend and girlfriend, then the adventure of the thing and the idea of conquering and being conquered added spice to the chase and men dont even mind begging for it. But now you are married. If he thinks you are not interested in the sex and only allow him when he asks maybe because you feel obligated to or the bible said 'your body is his body' etc; then he will carry out the act with a sense of guilt orlike its work.
'Let me satisfy my urge and finish jo, aafter all I know she's not really enjoying it. If not that I can't control this urge I wouldn't have bothered self."

'let me do and go, I'm not a good lover, she has told me so her self; let me do quick while she is still cooperative".

These aren't sexy thoughts. This won't make the man stay longer, if anything it will reduce his performance over a period of time. Its time to change his mindset to a sexy mindset.


Brb.

@joella1 op so you have a spiritually inclined one-minute man, otherwise known as a 'rapid ejaculator'.

A premature ejaculator is one who comes so quick he can't even get you pregnant. I want to believe you guys already have kids. So he's a rapid ejaculator not premature ejaculator. Knowing the problem is the first step in solving it.

Your husband knows his problem. Its a BIG problem for all males, one of the main destroyers of our big ego, not being able to satisfy our woman. Believe me when I tell you he is more worried about it than you are. What he needs to improve is your support not any harsh treatment like refusing his gifts or throwing the holy book 'your body is my body' at him. Force will do nothing in this area.

There are some questions that need answering before we go further. These questions are explicit but necessary. All kids below 18 please log off this section and go read your books pls.

1. How many times a month do you guys have sex?

2. Who initiates it? Think carefully about this pls.

3. Do you guys have a routine position for sex, if yes what is it?

4. Is he open for trying different positions during sex?

5. Does he object to 0ral sex? If yes what is his main reason? Religion, disgust?

6. Have you ever caught him watching p0rn?

7. How many times a week does he take alcohol

8. What time on the average do you guys have sex? Mornings, afternoons, evenings or midnight?

9. What is his occupation? Does he travel a lot?

10. When he 'almost disvirgined' you was he a virgin himself? Did he have sexual escapades before he married you?

11. Have you ever urged him to try harder in the process of having sex?

The answers you give will determine the next step.
Stay blessed.

Egopersonified, godmystrength, soulglo see una head like 'what is dishwashing' as if say una no know. Abeg don't embarrass the bros he explained it very well what it was.

However it seems the husband has issues dishwashing too so this might be tricky.
Brb.

Beware of Ebola.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa






Money don lost!

babygirlfl: I personally do not think it is more prevalent. I think it is percieved to be more prevalent. In my opinion, there are two reasons why it is percieved as more prevalent.

1. A woman is percieved as soft and nurturing which means that when she does something wrong, she is more critisized. Just like when a female robber is caught with other male armed robbers. You will hear people talk mostly talk about the female robber.

2. As it is then mostly talked about, it appears to be more prevalent.

Interesting.
This same argument can be used to defend the notion that men beat their wives more than wives beat their husbands.

@whyalwaysme, Op do you anticipate the failure before it occurs? Do you get the deal then as the end comes you start to think "is this deal going to fall like the others?" And then it falls?

There is a book I'm sure you would have heard about or seen Titled "The Secret."

Read it.

My 'first time' aboard an aircraft was ARIK airlines.


It was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life
I wore my suit, strolled on board with my briefcase, said 'hello' in my foreign accent to anyone who cared to listen,
Na Benin to abuja flight o.
I didn't want to look like JJC so I was just forming like its an everyday thing for me.
Omo, as the airplane took off see as I grabbed my seat eh!
The passenger beside me was like 'are you alright'
I said 'Yels, of course of course. Thank you for asking.'

Next thing the plane was just slanting upwards and going up and up and up
I held unto my seat for dear life and ground my teeth together.
Small time the plane levelled out and those fine air hostesses came and served us snacks and drinks. I was munching mine when it occurred to me to look outside the window(they used window blind or something to close it. Omo as I saw the height my breathing seize o! I was taking deep breaths but it was like I was underwater, no oxygen was reaching my brain!
I didn't know when I removed my suit and tie and was fanning myself. The guy beside me was 'are you okay?'
Men I forgot my ego and shook my head 'no'. I couldn't even talk again.

The man turned out to be a doctor. He told me to sit with my head between my legs and when that wasn't working (by now I was almost passing out) he asked for large amounts of juice for me. I drank it and felt a little better but my vision was still going dark.
Finally they gave me OXYGEN TANK to breathe with.
By this time the whole passengers were praying for me and speaking in tongues

When the plane finally landed everybody cheered and were clapping my back as if I was a celebrity. One middle aged woman in particular prayed extra for me
Then I was made to wait until everybody disembarked and they used ambulance to come and carry me.
Chai! One of the worst days ofy life
The good news was I passed the interview I was going for

pickabeau1: is there any issue with travelling with his family

How is the relationship with the inlaws.. his or her mom

He can't travel with them just yet. No provision for it. They are entitled to one month vacation with him over there travel expense paid by the company and that's it.
No problems with in laws as far as I know. Why asking?

orbis: Well, tell him to give you the chance since he aint interested. Am sure you would have been the one if only you had stopped eying that babe across your office....

D position is not transferable

Call me all the names you want, Nairaland don turn me to office tatafo

One of my colleagues recently got promoted after doing a very good job of meeting all his targets this year and has been given a prestigious position to work as manager in our UK branch. Now there's no need saying how much he is going to gain from this in terms of finances and new opportunities. We were all happy for him, small jelousy enter small I no go lie

The strange thing now is, he has refused to sign the acceptance letter and is opting for a higher position or even a similar post as long as its in the country(Nigeria).
His reason is that he:s worried about his kids. He has two sons and a daughter, the eldest is 7, the youngest 2yrs. He says his wife beats them 'mercilessly'. He was brought up in a home where corporal punishment was with words and yes there was the occasional caning but not so much. However he is complaining that his wife even uses her bare hands to beat the kids on their back, bumbum, pulls their ears and gives them heavy knocks on their head. He said the last one was when the eldest was given assignment from the summer vacation school and he didn't even know what happened the next thing he heard screaming and on coming in saw the boy crying and the wife pushing him into the guest room to lock him in for 'some time.' He confronted her and she said yes she beat him and wanted to lock him up cos he was being stubborn. The man had to bring the boy out despite heavy protests from the mother and do the assignment with the boy and he said the boy did it well that all it required was a little patience.

He says his wife feels he is spoiling the kids, that that was how she was trained when she was little. He disagrees that all she needs is to be patient that even if she must discipline the highest she can use is cane and not her bare hands.

Because of this he feels he will be 'abandoning his kids to a terrorist'(his words) and his conscience can't let him do so.

But this opportunity is once in a lifetime and will open doors one can only dream of, so some of us are encouraging him to go but be calling often and besides his family can come and join him in a year or two. Others think he should stay and take the higher Nigerian post since the salary is almost the same.

What do you guys think?

Why the reduction? What needs to be fixed. Pls let me know asap
Don't make jokes about my username.

jjwaterfalls: Am starting to think d op is a doc.

MeanwhilE yur write-up doesn't look like it was researched on, rather it looks like It was written 4rm ur mind and u were angry whilE writting it, cos itS too provocativE

No I'm not.

I didn't research anything o Na as e dey my mind I talk am o. Research ke.
I wasn't trying to come off as angry, just trying to see the whole issue from an unbiased point of view. It was even a bit funny to me sef
Wetin provocate you inside?

Op the man must have specifically asked her if she had albinos in her family and she said 'no'.
Only to deliver and he got the shock of his life.

Sending this your long epistle to him am not sure it will help. It sounds more like he is feeling betrayed.

I am ashamed to say I'm not comfortable around albinoes. Lord forgive me but its one of the deal breakers for me in a relationship. I know its not their fault and I'm proud to say I have three of them as my friends, but..hmmn. It ain't easy.

Op put yourself in the man's shoes. Be honest. How would you react?