₦airaland Forum

kokaneprodigy:
Which one is “without fear of another man sharing her” this is naivety at its peak.

Is it tho? Human psychology is very interesting especially the psychology of males, most men are jealous naturally, common boyfriend dey get jealous because his grilfriend was seen with another guy, not knowing he has no cliam to her becuase she's a free woman. Marriage often solves this problem because a married woman in our society behaves according to certain expectations.

The honest truth is when you look at it strictly from a business/risk viewpoint, men SHOULD NEVER GET MARRIED! However, when you look at it from the point of emotional connection, ability to secure a partner that shares a common goal with you, ability to continue enjoying her without fear of another man sharing her, ability to not only have kids but for those kids to have a stable home based on love, respect and family values. When you consider all these things, you would be MAD not to get married!

Let me be frank with you, life itself is a risk, if we considered all the bad things that happens in life, most of us would tell baba God not to send us down. So as a risk taker, did you do your feasibility study? Did you analyze the risks and what controls did you put in place to ensure you married a good wife and she doesn't turn into someone that would bleed you dry? If you're wealthy, do you have a prenup? Religious consultations( Pastor, Alfa, Ifa & Google)? Background checks includinfg social media history? Did you analyze her family? Any generational or imminent curse?

Marriage can be sweet once you lay the proper foundation, build it on honesty and facts then watch it blossom, build it on lies and secrets then watch it implode and ruin you. The greatest factor is not why but who.....Pick the right who and the why becomes easy!

fidelisodogbo:
No doubt, Nigeria is a backward nation! The theology of Islam they still embraced in northern Nigeria is one that existed in the 7th to 10th century during the islamic invasion and conquest. I lived in Qatar (Middle East) for more than a decade. Such barbaric and inglorious act in the name of Islam never happened. They've moved on...hosting soccer competition, female beach volley ball, gymnastics, swimming and athletics sports involving females. Makes use of the court system and respect the due process of the law. Of most annoying is the fact that Nigerians do not know that they are two different peoples. Falsely claiming one Nigeria is plainly stark ignorant reflexes. The broken down system will also let these killers live like normal human beings rather than confined behind bars. How can a Country be so daft and stupid? ...

What majority of the North practice is the same as Iran or Pakistan. It is extremism to the core and does not represent modern Islam. The problem is further compounded by poverty and the godlike status most Nigerians give to their religious leaders. Even Southern Muslims are seen as inferior and not worthy of any true position in Islam according to them. Unfortunately there's no credible solution in sight, it continues to get worse and worse.

Saltybear:
You are one of the few nairalanders I respect don't fully yourself have some pride.

Now to the issue. Tinubu caused it for himself. He has was always openly hateful against the southeast and never regarded us in the southsouth.

Unfortunately he can't win. The southwest is divided and the north will never support him.

He called the southeast okoros on numerous occasions in public and he called us in Southsouth drunkards

He sowed the seeds of hatred long before the harvest

You speak Jargon and call it facts! How can someone hate the SouthEast that during his reign had more Igbos in his government than any non Igbo state in Nigeria, ever heard of Joe Igbokewe? How can he hate Igbos and openly pave way for Ameachi and many other SE/SS folks in today's government. Fianally, ask yourself who was the first political leader in the SW to ever openly advocate for an Igbo person to bag a chieftancy title in Lagos, he even went as far as to create ways for Igbos to be baale in Lagos. You can hate the man all you want but PLEASE STOP THE FALSEHOOD!

Aparche:
So why don't you wear only your boxers to work and if your boss react ask him if they have any written policy for dress code.

You'll be talking about human rights as if the other customers in that restaurant are not humans that also have a right to have their meals in peace without being assaulted with a walking pornography.

Go back over what you wrote and tell me when did going to work equal going out to eat at a restaurant. I won't bother to waste my time explaining the difference to you. For your second point, aspire to travel out of the country and see how sane people interact, restaurants with dress code have it written and expectations are set before the customer sets foot in the restaurant. You just don't pick and choose based on perceived morality, I know we love doing things backwards in theis country but let's be guided, that's all I'm saying. Would you also feel offended if a guy came into the restaurant with a nose ring, tattoos and and dreadlocks? Or is the madness only geared towards females?

janga02:
Maybe he is serving his purpose in that condition he is. Let's give thanks to God wherever we find ourselves.

You okay? 39 years in coma, what f*cking purpose? Ordinary man spends 10 years in jail and is already running mad not to talk of someone that spends 39 years unable to move, speak or express himself......No dey talk this rubbish talk again, it's better to just keep it to yourself!

It's a symptom of a larger problem in Nigeria. In a sane country, unless the restaurant has written policy for dress code, she could sue them and win a discrimination case but as we all know 9ja is not sane. Look at people here focusing on her dressing rather than the act itself, when companies starts denying or approving service based on how you dress, look or how they feel then we are heading towards a state of slavery 2.0.

A lady was denied entrance a while back because she was a lady and did not have a male with her, soon another lady will be denied for wearing long hijab and so on and so on. Imagine as a guy you wanted to take a lady to a nice spot but when you got there you were denied entry because you had tattoos or your lady wore a double nose ring, how would you feel? This is the danger of a society that places perceived morality over common sense and human rights. Same people that would cry and spit fire when social media bill becomes active are now supporting the same kind of censorship/discrimination. Clueless nation and sheepish people.....5&6!

1x2x3:
Nigerians really deserve the poor leadership they get. I'm not a political person so I wish the best candidate to drive Nigeria forward should win irrespective of tribe. I expect you to question the credibility of someone who came out to defend killers of his own people and also kept mum when his people are being chased out of their ancestral home.

Actions speaks louder than words, Tinubu does not need to speak in order to move mountains, he is a master strategists and will not allow tiny fishes to make him say or do something that would land him in prison for treason, those shouting Oduduwa republic or that Nigeria must break are mostly edmpty drums with nothing to offer, an elser statesman will never utter such words. Furthermore, all you people shouting Tinubu this Tinubu that, the man has no intention of contesting in 2023, he has already done the feasibility study and concur that it is better to be a king maker than try to be a king and break the castle. Don't be surprised when the Jagaban announces his support for another candidate, someone you did not even think about.

Dreamchaser2424:
Fall down and die

O kuti....Gbogbo ara ni ogun....The man's juju still dey kampe

Wickedfacts:
There is so much poverty in the land. Look at how 100k looks like 100 Million to people who can't believe that someone transferred 100k to soldiers to teach cultists a lesson.

It's not really about the money but the state of Nairaland itself, so many stories are pushed to the front page full of lies. Even this poster, if you check his post history, you'll find it hard top believe that he's telling the truth because he's a daydreamer and loves spewing rubbish but what do I know, 9ja itself is a cruise

Many are going to be shocked when Tinubu does not run for president and decides to support a candidate we all never expected. Most of you are so focused on Tinubu that you don't see the chess pieces being moved and the game of thrones being played.

Ask yourselves this simple question, has Tinubu ever beeen shy to make his ambitions known? NEVER! Not when he campaigned for Senator, not when he campaigned for Governor and certainly not when he chose Fashola, Ambode and Sanwo-Olu. We sit here shouting over 50 million Naira from a man worth Trillions. Are we okay at all? Whether charity begins at home or away, the sooner we realize we are just spectators, the better! Tinubu's matter no gon put food for your table o, be wise!

I was their biggest fan but it is becoming increasingly clear that they are under a spell especially this Peter with his arrogance. He was always less talented than his brother(musically) and I guess the frustration has been building for some time but this is no way to address fans. No be fans say make you no love yopur brother, no be fans tell you to venture into solo career in which you know fully well say na ofutufete.....Just retire already and save your fans from seeing more of your decline.....SPITS

In this life as long as your conscience is clear nobody can guilt you! Even my very own siblings know that you can't just come to me and say bro dash me 1000 dollars, I'll be like for what? I'm going to grill you like Oputa panel but if you behave sensibly and bring forth good ideas to turn the money into recurring income, I'll be your biggest cheerleader and supporter. Nigerians no dey ever finish their problems, it's always one problem or the other and the same people will be eating goat head pepper soup every weekend and drinking beer, me wey dey abroad sef no dey chop like that

This is not wickedness or strictness, it's making sure Nigerians do not run you down and bring you back into the poverty you worked so hard to escape.

Angelfrost:
When you are ready to intelligently and civilly learn about the reality of life, quote me... Till then, continue acting like a petulant child like your idol above. Bye!

You honestly believe I'll take life advice from someone that use the tongue out emoji, nothing wey person no fit see for Nairaland o, it is well!

Exodora:
Pride comes before a down fall.
You can't possible do it all on your own .
Somebody some how contributed . People listened and liked the music first , at least acknowledge them .

You don't get it, he's not referring to his fans or his mom or his close pals. He was referring to those haters who shaded him the last 2 years, if you visit his Twitter regularly you'll see all sorts of hate comment from so called fanatics of other musicians. Na real war, so let my guy celebrate how he deems fit!

Angelfrost:
Try again... You made no sense!

There are no self-made men in this world! Not a damn one! It takes wisdom and maturity to know this universal truth!

Abeg be quiet! Self made does not mean alone, it means not relying on the sponsorship or finances of others, in the music industry it means not signing your life away to producers/marketers etc. Dude could have blown a long time ago if he signed with Mavin or some hotshot record company but he didn't, dude worked on himself, gave his fans what they wanted and God handled the rest.

9jaRealist:
Dude, abeg drag your knuckles out of the Stone Age...
Mental torture and scars are just as bad as (if not worse than) physical ones.
>

Yea no doubt and I bet you're the type that would off himself when someone shouts at him. Physical and mental toughness should be taught by every parent. Life is unfair, life is ahrsh, if you have to kill yourself just because you feel ill treated then f*ck you!

It just proves that this generation are just weaklings. People now see death as easier than being ridiculed. Your parents accused you wrongly, so what? Did they beat you? Even if you received beating, did they mark your body with blade and put pepper on it? Even if they did all that, did they call your neighbors and the rest of the people to come and watch?

Omo, these kids cannot grow up in the 80s and early 90s o, dead body for don plenty.....Anyways her fight is over, rest in peace!

Everyone is not meant to work for someone, everyone is not meant to have a office job, do not clash with your destiny. With that said, majority of Nigerian graduates cannot write a proper CV/Resume, majority of jobs requires 3-8 years experience, where you wan get am as a fresh graudate? This is why it is important to start the process of job hunt before you leave school. Starting from your 2nd year, find a local company that would employ you as an intern or understudy, make sure it relates to what you're studying. A year or two experience with such company will look so good on your CV/Resume.

Furthermore some courses have 1 year or 6 months I.T or Practicum, take advantage of it. Finally, there's nothing less desirable than someone looking for a job while jobless, most companies nowadays wants to drag you away from other companies, the HR believes if you're truly a top talent then you should have something that you're doing. Ability to show this on your CV/Resume puts you at an advantage over most candidates, remember the HR does not know you, your degree does not make you stand you, what makes you stand out is your job history/activities, outside of education, how have you shown leadership/efficiency/teamwork?

DEMZEE:
Noooo we don't need a woman who is financially stable or even educated. We just need a woman who is feminine, submissive, cooperative, fit, have fidelity and young.

I don't deal with hoes bro, I kick them to the streets.

Marriage is transactional.......commitment, time, resources, emotional stability from the man for sex from the woman. It's that simple

Why are u not considering women's sexual mating strategy though??

Well we are two different people, a financially stable or educated woman might intimidate you but they are enticing to me. I agree marriage is transactional but to look at it from purely physical nature will land you in hot waters sooner than later.

DEMZEE:
Baba every woman wants the top 10% high value men.

She doesn't understand she has to share him with other women.

Women also do this things wen they are young, especially in their early 20s. Women smv peaks at 23yrs and men smv peaks at 37yrs.

If u understand women's sexual mating strategy and men's sexual mating strategy, you wont be thinking like an egalitarian equalist

Hope you also understand every man wants a top woman( Boobs, ass, pretty, clean, good cook, financially capable etc) also, he just wants to be able to control her as well. Hope you keep the same reasoning when you have to share your woman with other guys unless you decide to marry a pig . If you properly read what I wrote, you would realize I was more about emotional needs than physical or sexual mating strategy that you keep referring to.

I can never advise any woman to stay with a cheating husband, even if she stayed she will never forget and that in itself is very dangerous. Our men are equally as culpable, we want women to forgive but when they do their own we raise god of thunder to fire them. Now here's a shocker, 90% of Nigerian men wil lcheat at one point or the other but there's a difference between a cheat and one that gets caught. Women must realize that leaving a man because of an affair is like gambling, it rarely ends well unless you're playing with awoof money. If a man has evr made you smile, happy or thankful to God then why crucify him when he makes a mistake or becomes distracted? Same goes for men, if your loving wife has been an angel, a blessing to your life but she messed up just once, are you saying all the good she did becomes null & void?

WE NEED TO BE BETTER HUMANS, WE NEED TO UNDERSTAND LOVE IS NOT BY MOUTH ALONE BUT THROUGH TRIALS AND TRIBULATION.....I FIT DIE 4 YOU, NO BE BY NAIRALAND/INSTAGRAM O

blackpanda:
Lol u are only deceiving yourself daer. Not only tax. Which mumu tax u pay??

Every adult pays taxes in some way or another! You chop meat pie for restaurant, tax dey! You buy petrol, tax dey! You use toll gate or buy recharge cards, tax has been added one way or the other. Not to now talk of bank transactions, buying items online, salaries etc. If the average Nigerian knew the various forms of taxation in this country, we would start paying attention more to government wastage!

CyclistViola:
Well, that's where you are wrong. No one has the right to tell a woman how long she should stay without speaking up. It's her pain, it's her story and in her own time, she should speak up. Yes, it would be good if every rape victim speaks up immediately they are hurt, so the perpetrators can be brought to book, but have you ever stopped to consider the factors involved? Fear? Hurt? Stigma? Victim shaming. These and many more are reasons they can't speak out
And just so you know, the ones that do speak out, majority of the cases aren't prosecuted. Rape is more rampant than you think and most are swept under the rug even when they reach the station. We only have access to what we know now because of social media. And it's the same social media that manages to put pressure regarding some cases that you end up prosecuted. Nonetheless, please let a rape survivor be strong enough to tell her story. Let her heal.

Now to your point about her not calling names. Pray tell me why she should feel comfortable to call names? Today, it will be her word against that of the rapist's. And it's funny that the same people clamouring that she calls names are the same that will be accusing her of trying to bring an "innocent" man down if she makes that step.

And please, I would love to see the research or rather the videos (evidence) from these "trained" psychologists who say being raped up to three times or more is rare.

This sounds more like making excuses than facing facts! Yen yen yen, no one will believe her, yen yen yen majority of cases are not prosecuted. If a celebrity like Iyabo Ojo cannot be bold and speak out then what should those with less power and fame do? My point remains what does she have to be afraid of? This is 9ja remember! People get called out for fetish, for stealing, for all sort of things, can't imagine what the next door neighbor could have over her to make her feel so timid.

In any aspect of criminal law, the preservation and timely presentation of evidence is crucial, if you ever want the justice system to be better at prosecuting rape cases, you can't continue using psychological trauma as excuse for not speaking up, remember it is not about what you're comfortable with but what you can actually proof! The law does not and should not be based on emotional rhetoric! You keep mentioning let her heal but we are talking about several incidents spanning decades. Surely she can be bold enough to name the least dangerous predator which is the neighbor, come on if she's comfortable discussing it in an interview surely she can call him out?

CyclistViola:
Please stop propagating rape culture. She was raped by a man. A man raped her! Why focus on her, the victim rather than the man who did the wrong deed? Not enough men are condemned for their crimes! We always find a way to put the blame on the woman. So what if she was even wearing a miniskirt? Is that reason to be forcefully violated? No means no! Whatever she was wearing, she didn't deserve to be raped. It is about time we put an end to this dastardly rape culture. For crying out loud, blame the perpetrator not the victim.

And for your information, a beast who wants to rape a woman would rape her, not minding if she's swaddled in blankets from head to toe. Like you haven't read of children being raped. Pray tell me what they must have done to attract their rapist since it's now the fault of the victim.

A person who gives an excuse for rape is certainly no different from someone who stands by and watches the act being committed. You are simply a rape apologist. I really wish we will be careful with our actions and words. Too many women have been violated and they are not strong enough to tell their stories. And people like you continue to crop up, minimising their suffering. It really is disheartening.

No need for the epistle, she will be blamed because even trained psychologists would tell you that the odds of being raped three or more times in a lifetime is extremely rare, now she said 5 times not by the same guy but at different points in her life. Okay let's even forget all that, do you know why rapist continue to enjoy their wicked ways? Because victims don't really call them out! Even now, she can't properly name the predators especially the one that was her neighbor, at her age what does she have to be fearful of again? You can blame men all you want but soemthig ain't right here! EXPOSE THE DEVILS, IF NOT FOR ANYTHING, TO PREVENT FUTURE GIRLS FROM HARM.

davido91:
No he's actually right about that, gay people are so desperate they come after anyone that manages to look good.

Then you shut that sh*t down, sounds like the guy kept entertaining the attention and that in itself looks suspicious. Your fellow man asked for intimacy and you no curse him papa? He sends you nude and you no block am? What's really going on?

Stop confusing being introvert with being depressed or suffering from chronic anxiety. Most Nigerian introverts are just people frustrated due to lack of opportunity or resources. I have seen many people claim introvert only to travel out of the country and start balling. I have seen so called introverts suddenly turn into motivational speakers when they reached a certain status in their career/life, in fact I am an introvert by nature but when the success came with the exposure abroad, I discovered that what I called being introvert was just plain frustration, I no know how I became a talkative once dollars became involved

gassbee:
pls which state is this because d judicial system in some state is so slow

Lagos, Eti-Osa to be precise.

WibusJaga:
Now, if this tenant starts looking for house now & finds a suitable house this month & decides to pack, will the landlord refund his balance 5 month's rent?

By right, the 6-month quit notice is supposed to start from the day his present rent expires, but the problem is that most tenants abscond with the rent arrears.

I advise the tenant to start looking for house now & if he finds a suitable house b4 the end of his current rent, the Landlord should refund the balance rent.

Which right? Which law? In Lagos, it can come anytime even after one month, what matters is that a notice was given, the tenant still maintains the right to complete the tenancy or move out early and get a refund. A tenant that was given a 6 month notice in month 4 and the notice covers all the way to month 10, has been duly served. After the rent expires, the only notice left is a 7 days intention to recover. Just did this for 2 tenants last year and the judge gave the order easily.

nencounter10:
This will help

https://www.google.com/search?q=is+adultry+a+crime+in+Nigeria%3F&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-b-m

Thanks for proving my point, now go back to what I wrote and tell me what you are arguing again?

Adultery is a criminal offence under the Penal Code of Northern Nigeria. Section 387 and 388 stipulate imprisonment for two years, and/or with a fine for adultery. It is not prosecuted under the Criminal Code of the Lagos State of Nigeria.

nencounter10:
The best thing for you to do is to consult a lawyer.

I have 2 lawyers in my family and my uncle is a SAN, so on this particular issue I have all the consultations I need...thank you!