₦airaland Forum

--

If I had hairlicious lenght of hair. I would be wearing my hair as a top. Shikena!!!
Thank God for 26inch brazilian hair

Na Uzoo be this, madam when people with short hair talk you too open mouth! If I catch u ehn, I will use scissors and show you short hair then we can start stretching together

So I just returned from a long retreat organised by Opus Dei in one of their centers and the topic of mortification was discussed at almost all the meditation sessions. Mortification is one of the tools by which a christian may achieve sanctity/holiness. Remembering that our Lord enjoined us to be holy as our heavenly Father is holy. Other tools are constant prayer, dedication in our everyday activities, etc.

Saints are said to be people who did ordinary things in an extraordinary way. We too can aspire to be saints and thats where mortification comes in. St Jose Maria Escriva founder of Opus Dei wrote "don't say that person gets on my nerve rather say that person sanctifies (mortifies) me" we all know people who annoy us or get on our nerves or make us want to scream, as a mortification we can decide to be patient with such people, to be kind to them or to even have a conversation with them ( as long as it is not an occasion of sin). In our hearts we don't want to but because of love of GOD and a desire to become closer to him we do it and we offer it up as a prayer intention. As we continue in such practices after a while it may become 2nd nature and u find yourself doing it with ease. This is just an example. Another example might be to decide to do our jobs or normal daily tasks with more passion/love than we ordinarily do offering the extra effort as a prayer to Our Father in heaven.

St Jose also said "choose mortifications that don't mortify others" a mortification is a personal decision/action and we shouldn't make others suffer because we choose too. (I think parents should be exempt cos they have to train the kids.....just me talking sha). Now The Church teaches that not all suffering is bad, sometimes we need to suffer for the sake of a greater reward eg a student spending more time reading in order to pass an exam, and thats how we should view mortification, suffering this earthly body a little so that the spiritual being is more united with God, because it is usually in the midst of pain that we find it easier to put all trust in GOD.

Mortification must be done with LOVE: Love of God and of our neighbour if not we would just be like the pharisees who follow letter if the law without living the spirit of the law. It is good to attach a prayer intention as well.

I hope I made sense sha. Anyone have anything else to add

Uzoo your hair and mine sound like sisters........mine should be the elder cos she turns coarse sometimes after a day, I havent tried a tea rinse before, maybe I should. Am in my 6th week of strechibg and its like at my last deep conditioning all my hair went with the comb . My hair is fuller now and I have more strands on the edge but it doesn't want to grow like that hairlicious chick's own.

Am so demoralised I just had to go fix my hair even though I planned not to. Does anybody have ideas for cool protective styles for short hair, the ones I see are usually for long hair.

^ ^ ^ ^ . Reading your post makes me wanna go back to school and read medicine so that I can save lives like you do.

Chukwudi abeg no vex.....explain your post in naija english before some people interpret nonsense to suit their biased arguments.
Ha! I said it!!!

Oluwalala: Its physcopants like you, that is holding nigeria back! Are u saying people can't have personal opinion on issues of social importance, must it be attributed to religion or a paticular faith! Its people like you, that are the 1st to judge teenage mothers. I don't support abortion, not because am a christian but because I don't think its right!

Please don't be angry sir that he didn't allow leeway for your views. I think he was refering to organised religion not individual feelings when he asked the question. Chukwudi44 is not a psycho, he is just a fervent devout catholic who loces the Lord and his Church.

Well done

nanz: is all abortion killing of innocent lifes?what will u say of development of foetus at the Fallopian tupe?

Emmm the child is still innocent. The child did not wilfully choose to develop in the fallopian tubes to kill its mom

Chrisbenogor: Let us keep emotions aside madam,
In your previous post you said God "understood" that she "murdered" the child.
Now let us your look at your analogy, you are saying murder is right under certain circumstances. If we go by what you are saying the fetus is a human being and innocent one at that, the woman killed a human being albeit to save herself. It is still MURDER no matter how much you paint it. If you say it is permissible under "certain" circumstances then certainly if a woman feels she cannot take care of the child she should be given the option of terminating the pregnancy.

My apologies if my english was misleading I said "in our human thinking we think God will understand" thats how we justify the action of killing a child to save the mother. I personally dont agree with that. Abortion is cold blooded murder no matter the reason, as a christian I believe God will judge us all on the last day based on our actions during our lifetime. Only then will we know if HE understands. A woman "feels" then she aborts a living thing, people can feel a lot of ways and most of them will not be noble feelings.

My position however is different
A fetus is not a human being, all innocent human beings deserve to live. There is no reason whatsoever to kill a human being unless he or she has committed a crime which is punishable by death according to the laws of the land. A fetus however does not qualify as a human being because it is biologically still dependent on another human being to become fully independent. There has to be a line... a line where all of us christian muslim budhist traditional worshippers atheists all agree and that is when the child is born. At that point it does not matter if the child was a result of rape, incest, whatever it is that child is now a human being and ready to be accorded all the protection a human being should have.

I disagree with you here, a fetus is a living creature, a being with a soul and spirit, also i dont think any human being is truly independent from others just that the degree matters. In the case of babies its to a very large extent and thats how God made it. There are invalids and old and sick people out there who are vety dependent on others, when we are born we simply trade biological dependency for material, nutritional, financial etc dependency......all na dependency
As for the line........ There are cases of 7 month abortion where labour was induced, the lady birthed a premature child but the baby was killed, the doctors argument is that since the child was born as part of an abortion procedure, they were still right.. mean while with an incubator such a baby would have survived. People will cross that line and one day you will find them cultivating fetuses and harvesting them for stem cells because a certain vague line has not been crossed. The only line I would suggest is at conception

How come am just seeing this thread. Hi everyone am proudly Catholic. I think I have a million testimonies on how Our Lady and the intersections of the Saints have been of immense use to me. I thank God for the gift of His Mother, for the gift of the Holy Catholic Church and for my catholic brothers and sisters. God bless you all

^ please where is the ROLMAO icon when u need it

Classic example of when spiritual and human desires clash and there is no grounds for negotiation. I believe it is possible to be a good christian and a famous star at the same time

Chrisbenogor: How many kids have you adopted? Your blood relatives adopted? I am sure it's zero.
The fetus is not a human being.

He doesn't need to adopt kids. Did he tell you he was looking for kids . BTW when people adopt in naija, they usually go to great lenghts to conceal it, so the true statistics is not readily available. Like all things naija, the proper framework for the process to help people is not there. You csn spend years trying to adopt.....paperwork alone is crazy. That is why pregnancy farms flourish. People need babies from birth not at 3 months or 3 years. Give this girls an option....please don't abort, hook them up with families that need babies, let there be a sort of arrangement, take the stigma off adoption. In my maternal family, 3 out of 5 siblings adopted:for various reasons sha. The 4th one is starting the process now. When the first aunty adopted she tried hiding it but after a while it came out, the kid is 18years now and wants to enter UNILAG to study maths like me . If his own biological mother had aborted him nko.

The Fetus is a human being. No matter how people try to distort the truth or deny it. The fetus is a human being albeit a weak and defenceless one who needs 9 months to mature into an independent functioning one.

vivalableue: Ok I'm a firm believer in Christ. Already with 2 children in their young age (3 and 2) and I discover am pregnant. At first I was resolved to keep it, even though the father wanted nothing to do with his child. Until I started getting very ill, sharp pain in my stomach. The pregnancy was growing and causing internal bleeding due to a cyst on my ovary. I was so exhausted with running around with 2 small ones. Still even with prayer, I wasn't getting better. I had to stop working and was hospitalized. The abortion was offered and after much prayer and advice from pastor (who was against it) and parents (who were against it until they found out I was basically going to die if I kept the pregnancy, asked me to abort it). My kids must not be motherless in this very crucial time of life. I did it, and although I felt terrible none-the-less, I believe Godhas the grace to forgive and blessed me with in spite of my failings. I know that it was a very hard choice to make, but the babies who were already in my heart were my only factors. Yes my health and life meant a great deal, but the future of my babies was so important for me. How can you ask a mother to disregard the family she already has for a principle? Parents
will do anything to save their kids. That is all. Somethings aren't black and white, the world we live in is confused.

How many women do you know that had to make this decision and compare it to those who do it for cosmetic reasons. A very minute few, even women that are hypertensive carry baby to term nowadays. Mordern medicine is really doing wonders, if you dont know ask your doctor, dont be surprised another doctor may have been willing to work with you to carry baby to term. Imagine a woman who has been trying to conceive for 8 years and then she does with this complication, such a woman may try everything to bring baby to term (parents will do anything to save their kids, your words). This story is very touching and sad but guess what if you still committed MURDER to save your life, for a worthy cause sha so in our human thinking we believe God will understand. But what of those aborting babies because they are female and they want a male child, or those aborting because they had unprotected sex or because they dont want more children or just to punish a guy

The sad truth is that abortion is a controversial issue and in this age of people wanting to hear what pleases them, no sane pastor would spend so much time on a doctrine that may cost him his customers sorry congregation.
All of you talking about saving the mother's life, l hope you understand that it is just in 5% of pregnancies that will really/necessarily lead to this point. A lot of abortions are cosmetic or for family planning. Medical science is very advanced now and there are a lot of success stories of women carrying complicated pregnancies to term. As for the victim of rape or molestation.....very sad story indeed and I would not wish that on anyone, but the fact is that the foetus is a living being and aborting it would be like punishing Peter for the crimes of Paul, the problem is more of a societal one where people blame the victim instead of consoling her.
Adoption in Nigeria is WAR! Its a difficult and demoralising process, if you are not strong you will give up hope. Most motherless homes have a list of coupkes who are online hoping to get a baby, but approval from government is usually slow and unfortunately most people want babies below one year. There is thread on nairaland talking about couples experiences with IVF, I was so touched when I read through the 66 pages, people out there want babies and we are here supporting abortion.
The solution is for everyone to practice what they preach....sexual abstinence.......
Any church that teaches that a foetus is not human or alive until a certain age is a big fraud,

@ Chukwudi44
I like how you stand for the Church and Faith, you always encourage me. God bless you

Neccessity is the mother of inventions and creativity. Unfortunately most of Nigeria's problem are caused by greed and pure incompetence. Then creative kids will need support from their parents and families. Anyway one day "Papilo" must make us proud

biafranqueen: He further explained that typical northern parents have 20-30 children and keep two or three they like, while sending off the remaining dozens out into the almajiri world to never know love.

Please this is not as typical as you would make it sound. 3 out of every 5 almajiris are not even Nigerian to start with. I still say that abortion is in the North is as high as else where, its just that there are no records. A lot of DIY goes on there and those gehs know the latest and safest ways, I served there and I stayed with Drs. If a girl came in with complications from DIY abortions they kept it off the books if not that girl would probably end up dead, killed by a vengeful relative or some radical he goat. Also abortion as a form of family planning is practised there very well and it is kept off the books. The figures you got come mostly from from NGOs am sure they even doctor their figures to make it lower cos they wldnt want some Imam to get up and say they are corrupting the young girls.you know how that will end na!

I feel your passion about this issue. You are very right, Nigerians generally are hypocrites. We will not adopt until we are pushed to the wall. Imagine a couple selling their property for IVF when they could ave just adopted and used that money to train the child. And they will not marry single moms. If you are a single mom and you don't have a strong family supporting you all the way, your life will be hell in Naija. People who you are better off than in every way will just feel the need to put you down.
But that does NOT make Abortion right. It is pre-meditated murder of an innocent child: yes the child is underdeveloped and cannot survive on its own but it is still a living being. And that's where most Pro-abortion posters are coming from but then again the question you asked is very important and should actually be addressed: What is the solution? That would require a whole re education of youths to value hard work and the fruits of such efforts over so called easy rewards from prostitution or pimping, Churches actually teaching their members about purity, honesty and the value of marriage amongst other efforts. A really Herculean task but one that I believe can at least be started.

Correction, abortion rates are not lower in the North. Its almost the same just that they are more discreet about it.

The solution is very easy, sexual morality, if you dont have sex you wont abort. Proper use of family planning for those couples who dont want more kids. These account for least 90% of abortions.

Stories that satisfy our morbid curiosity with the spiritual

luluosas: My dear please, take the world out of the WORD. I hope this help you to understand the Christian lifestyle. Thank you.

Emmmm I struggle to understand what you mean

Abortion is murder and a sin. Life begins at conception, so killing that child for any reason is murder. How many % of abortions are done because of rape or to save mothers life, I won't be surprised if its less than 10%.

But debating this bill will not solve the root issue which is the high rate of sexual immorality in our socities today. That's why we have a high rate of unwanted pregnancies that result in abortions.
For those saying how can u bring the child of a rapist into the world, child na child, when brought into this world they are all pure and without any character. It is the enviroment and the training they get that helps shape their characters into what it becomes. I have seen children of educated couples turn out useless and children of illitrates, teenagers, etc become useful members of society.
With the number of couples who are looking for babies spending money on IVF, maybe we could have situations where people could adopt babies who are not wanted.

Above is very nice and decent. Something I would like to wear

The reason why some of this doctrines change is because most times they were human in origin,created by humans to help guide other humans keep God's commandments,(like what the Isrealites did with the 10 commandments), as human taste and fashion changes, this laws will change. There was a time women could not wear trousers at all at all now its accepted. Who knows in the nearest future bumshorts may come to be accepted as normal everyday wear.
This applies to every human law on how to achieve holiness, they must expire. The only law that will not is that of God. And we all know why. In this mordern age, culture is changing ever faster than before.

Wow! We have freedom to come on nairaland and comment kn/insult people's religion anyhow, meanwhile for drinking from a well a woman is sentenced to death.

Congratulations to Kaffy and her husband!!! wow this babe is really strong, DAncing while pregnant. I really admire her cos she used her passion to make money anf fame for herself. I know a lot of people have and will continue to say crap but Kaffy dear keep up the good work. I wish her and all preggies safe delivery!!!

Uzoo thanks, its really helpful. Now to go through my wardrobe and see if I have anything that resembles the combos you highlighted. .

Uzoo abeg what about possible combinations for leggings. I finally bought a pair of black leggings and am not so sure about how/what to wear them...especially to work.

striktlymi: But still the defence has to come before we can ascertain its validity.

Ok daddy

striktlymi: ...are they to be feared I believe they have every right to put up their defence.

Well at least people have a heads up to be ready for useless defences that make no spiritual or intellectual sense except to the poster