₦airaland Forum

CHoccolaTE:
Sharapp

I haven't forgotten feminism
This topic is for women that don't want their kids to suffer in future.

I was in support of your analysis of why broke women shouldn't marry broke men. You have already given a valid point on the reasons. But if you claimed to be a Nigerian feminist that doesn't know their right from left then this topic should be off your jurisdiction. You have no business with them and does not share their sentiments. You will be sounding hypocritical and two-faced coin that doesn't know jack just want to follow the crowd. So pls stick to one side of a coin.

At this age group they want to explore life and taste the other side even if you package towers of gold, it will still never be enough for her. Either you are ready to accept more bullshits from her or you just go settle for more matured ones. The ball is in your court, but that she won't do it again, is what I can't guarantee you.

PerfectMatchNG:
Single mother challenge.
Take yourself back to the reason you became a single mother, will you travel the road again?
If so why and if not why?

Entry closes December 14. The answer Familanders deem the best wins $300 and you can participate from any country.

My guy entries has closed yesterday and we are yet to hear from you the next way forward. Hope it is not what am thinking? Still waiting.....

Graxie:
No simple logic anything, most of them are yet to explore the option of leaving their kids for their sperm donors, they can't even imagine it. If only they know that some of the men will do more for the kids than they are presently doing, they will explore the option.

;DMadam Graxie I really couldn't stop laughing at your comments of them dropping the children with their father and also found their way, maybe come for visit too. I understand your point and angle you are coming from. Believe me my sister you are very right to say this. But I will also tell you that some men height of irresponsibility is Grade A. I have witnessed some myself. They don't care what becomes of the children. Most of them will just drop the children with their own mother and walk away never minding how they fair. And you know some men emotions and empathy has been thrown inside the gutter. It is always difficult for a lady to neglect the child knowing that the man responsible is a guy who wants to enjoy sex but have nothing to do with the products of that sex.

Most of you see marriage as an achievement that is why you go all out to attack any lady who is yet to marry at certain age. You don't care if there are certain things or situations that would have made her to be single at her age level. I am in my thirtieth and still single because I decide never to marry until I meet some standard I set for myself. Yet in this, I have seen guys that don't measure up financially to me got married. I have seen marriages of different types and shapes that I will rather remain single than trapped myself in that shittes. Yet people don't go all out to use derogatory names on me rather respect my decision but won't do the same to a lady who set the same standard, why? We can both agree that some ladies are ho.ess, stupid, fish brain, don't know what they want, toxic and anything you deem fit to call them because they probably deserved it. But to go around generalizing all ladies as such is height of foolishness or stupidity in which mental evaluation might be needed to bring such fellow back to mental state. Sometimes I wonder what society you people live in to not see the rot in this scam called marriage. Only few are truly happily married while the rest just pretend along to justify the societal pressure of he/she is married. Only our mothers and fathers have privilege of having a taste of what marriage is. Not this generation where both are not ready to make sacrifice for their marriage to work. Please if a man can decide when to marry let a lady also have such privilege, because at the end of it all it is her cross to carry and I won't be there to carry it for her neither will you. And don't quote me to say she has menopause to deal with, because it is also her cross to carry. Shikena...

First of all you are not legally married to her if you did not go to court to sign the necessary papers. But as long as you paid her bride price and did the traditional right between both families then you are married to her in the eyes of man and God. Both of you should try seeing a counselor or elders in your family to see if you can iron out things. When that avenue has being used and no changes then you can talk of divorce. But you must try first to make it work. Marriage is not for babies or children.

bukatyne:
I don't even see Tonto as a victim, her single motherhood is her choice which is part manifestation of her craziness.

My point is that Churchill can and has the means to battle her in court if he really really wants to do so.

See I have seen deadbeat father as first hand because I have one relative facing such dilemma now so it will be unwise to justify any deadbeat father. This one even have 3 kids and neglect them for the wife alone. So you see . but the case where the woman has all it takes to Carter for the child thereby blocking the father' access to his own child is what I am talking about here. That is why the OP needs to hear his father's side.

bukatyne:
Are you telling me that if Churchill really wants to see his child, he would not?

With the influence he has?

Come on!

He does see at least once in a while with what we have seen online but she is still frustrating the effort. She just doesn't want the child to have anything to do with the father. He has come out to show it several times.

bukatyne:
In Tonto's case, I don't see why Churchill can't fight for joint custody.

He needs to really do better.

See T-billz and Tiwa na. JamJam still feels his father's presence.

I think Churchill is too laid back and has no excuse.

What do you mean by do better? He has also taken her to court to have joint custody but Tonto is trying every means to stop the effort. See there are toxic people even if you don't want to accept that, and Tonto is one of them.

dominique:
He'll blame everything on the mum and the son will take his side. I thought it was bad enough that Nigerian men justify domestic violence, now they're doing same for child neglect using the same "the mother must have done something to deserve it" mantra. I shiver at the next bad behavior they will justify and push the blame on the mother, possibly pedophilia. Very sick generation of men we're breeding.

I think you are taking it too far. Reconciling with his father won't stop his love towards his mother or care he ought to give to her. Moreover you can't disregard his father side of the story if he has the chance to hear him out. There are some instances where the mother will forcefully take the child away from the father neglecting the repercussion. At least a case study is clearly seen in Tonto Dike's case now. She even drag the father to court to stop him from seeing his own child ooo. Who does that for Christ's sake? So you see there always two sides to a coin.

The way and acts at which Mamman Daura displays his power is as if Buhari will never leave office again forgetting that he is running his tenure not royalty. Just like Saraki was feeling like a small god then but now being bamboozled here and there by the power that be. Daura should know that General Buhari will leave in 2023 no matter what. This regime has demonstrated the height of lawlessness in every capacity even more than we bargained for and someone will say we are still practicing democracy.

crackhaus:
I'm sure you have convinced yourself you are well read, no issue.

I only asked a simple question - is there scientific evidence showing that a child can be born with sexual desire?
Your response is that a female child can be born with high testosterone.

So is testosterone the specific hormone responsible for sexual attraction to women? If yes, why then would someone like Serena Williams with manly features like Caster Semenya (due to increased testosterone) be attracted to only men?

You are definately digressing from the main message. Caster drag IAAF to court claiming she can't be blame and shouldn't for having high testosterone level in her hormone and should not be a negative effect to her. And I stand with her in that regards. Because she is different from other feminine gender should not be used against her but be accepted as who she is, now that is my point. Now check this stats: Roughly 68% of the population has an IQ between 85 and 115. The average range between 70 and 130, and represents about 95% of the population. Now among this stats comes a very special person Marilyn vos Savant she has the highest IQ of 228 according to Guinness Book of Records. Now will you say she is abnormal and she is not human because she doesn't have the average IQ of humans? And that of Serena Williams is inconsequential in this regards(because it is a thing of choice).

crackhaus:
In those YouTube videos, did they also explain scientifically (with evidence) how a child can be born with latent sexual desire?

Yes with facts and figures done by researchers. Have you heard of Caster Semenya, a female athlete who has high testosterone level and the IAAF says she won't be able to compete with her gender due to high testosterone level. Was she born that way? Yes. I can't delve into it right now. My point is there are different type of people born with diff hormonal imbalance and rare gene that when you meet them or hear about them, they become abnormal to you because you don't see it around. Read books, watch countless of documentaries of real facts of life and you will understand that this world as it is today cannot be boxed inside one sentence or meaning or what you personally perceived it to be.

I was speaking from the same angle in the past because of my ignorance to some certain events I never knew of. I watched some videos on Youtube to discover that some people were actually born that way. I mean from childhood they discovered they were only attracted to the same gender as theirs. Not because someone coerced them into it but it was natural to them. What do you say to that? Do you call them devil? Or you say they have demonic possession (well that's African ideology of somethings they can't explain). What I have learnt from some of us overtime is that we try so much to fit some happenings into a particular box just like you stated above but then when it doesn't fit we say it is an abomination. The world is statistically going to 8 billion people with genes and traits. You will be amazed at your findings if you decide to do an intensive research. You won't sit in your corner to perceive that only one way should or must be the only way, tagging anything else as an abomination.

Purpletee:
hmmmm,most reasons wasn't because the single mums out there are promiscuous but because they trusted too much,loved too much and got disappointed at the end.

So mine was that, i met this guy while in school,we started dating,dated for a year and five months,he was a cheat and I was always forgiving, eventually broke up with him only to find out I was few weeks pregnant,i got misoprostol and mifepristine,but couldn't take the pills,dunno why,was in the hostel then,my roommates kept pestering me if I had taken the drugs but I lied to them,and no,it wasn't fear,my biological mum had me and gave me up for adoption, probably I felt I wouldn't be where I was if she had aborted me,or maybe I still held unto my affections for him and thought that would change him,until today I don't know the reason I decided to keep my baby,but in all,that was one of the best decisions i've taken in this life,though I dropped out of school,and had to get a job ,the journey wasn't easy,but above all I CONQUERED.


To all single mums out there,forget the societal stigmatization,you've carried a child in your womb for nine months,and gave life to that baby,you're awesome, even though it wasn't what you planned for your life,keep strong,it can only get better.

Your write up did not include if he rejected the child or not? Or you never bothered to inform him. Well the earlier people start realising that a cheat will remain a cheat the better for them. You don't forgive a cheat not even once. It takes two to tangle, if you can desist from cheating then your partner should wear the same shoe. But most times greediness and selfishness keeps us in the relationship until its too late. Some even call it love . At the end you carry your cross alone.

PerfectMatchNG:
Single mother challenge.
Take yourself back to the reason you became a single mother, will you travel the road again?
If so why and if not why?

Entry closes December 14. The answer Familanders deem the best wins $300 and you can participate from any country.

This challenge won't produce the most desirable winner because you can not tell which is a true event or a good story writer. How then do people choose who truly deserved to be a winner? I have read some already and can tell you that I felt sympathy for them and will be biased to pick any as a worthy winner. Well if nothing, single girls can learn a lot from their stories because many will definately be in line right now about to be dupped by one devilish guy. That alone is why the challenge is okay.

I guess your mum must be the only one taking care of the family because you never mentioned your Father in all your comments. I hope other ladies will learn from you when it comes to having raw sex with a guy because you have a lot to lose compare to the guy. Genevieve kept her pregnancy by then and it turn out good for her today. What you need now is family support and I pray you get it.

frozen70:
You have done all risky thing to remove the pregnancy, but the stubborn child refuse

Don't you think that you are harming yourself

What's your business with what people will say, you are not the first and won't be the last

If you really love the guy, inform him and keep the pregnancy

But if you don't really love him, go to hospital and stop self medication before you harm your self

With what has being said so far you are still talking about Love...haba wetin concern love for this matter?

you are a funny lady I swear. I am just laughing here while typing this. You needed an advise and yet still insulting people who proffered solution. Marriage means before you do jack you must consider your partner's reaction, negatively or positively.

Ladykiss:
Honestly i want to end it too but am heart broken and confused. I just need someone to give me hope, am hurt

You have said it yourself you don't need his money. So what else does he want to give you? Not love... Because it is already divided...not integrity? He is married and yet chasing you again. Just open your heart and this time don't be too picky because the right man might just be at your doorstep. You can also shoot your shot also if you see any available meat

Ladykiss:
Ofcourse i put myself in the wife shoe reason i congratulate him and wish him well. But right does that woman have to message me, the annoying part in her message was

"Hi lola i know you are my husband ex, how are you? She sent it with a laughing emoji

Is her message fair on me?

She can be jealous because the man might still be emotionally involved with you and she can sense it as a woman that she is. Just let them be. Your destiny does not lie with that man. Pls get that into your head.

How can you wait up to 6years and not make a decision?hmmmm you really let the ball out of your court. But the man is a greedy and selfish being, why won't he leave you alone after marrying a new wife yet still chasing you. My advice is to cut off from him and wait for another man to locate you in peace.

rolyboi:
There are some girls dt re still very faithful &would be so happy to have a faithful partner too.

In a relationship with a Nigerian girl, if you're not playing her, she's playing you. U need to be ubunjanised. Ignore the red pill and keep rignaroling. The only girl that deserves the celibacy rule is a virgin. If she says she's a Virgin and has not allowed you to check and confirm physically, she's playing you. Any other lady that says no sex till marriage but is not a virgin with intact hymenbis playing you. Ignore these rules and have them catch up with u one after the othe.

I checked ur profile and saw female as gender. I am surprised a lady is telling me to be Ubujanised . If you are really a lady and telling me this then I don't know what to say..

SKYloafFISH:
if it worked I wouldn't need to remove it

Not all toothache needs a dentist.most of them will recommend removal as first option, which is not the first solution. Mine was removed some years back by a dentist only for me to start getting pain from another tooth. I met someone who directed me to this herbal people and they gave me something to put in my mouth that it will kill The bacteria there after some time. I did that for at least a week and boom it disappeared like magic till today. I regret ever going to see a dentist since that incident.

cococandy:
So people can just decide to physically abuse others because they are going through stuff?

Is this supposed to be new to you? That is part of human traits. Sometimes we want others to feel our pain even without telling them about it. He might just need someone to sit him down and talk some sense into his brain.

The first solution to marriage palava is to inform family members and loved ones so they can try to repair any damage found. If that option has been utilized then you can think of separation before divorce. She wants her marriage back to a happy home but most of you are already giving her the last option in which most won't used when face with the same issue. Hmmm

millionboi2:
is not Igbo

Nigeria is a scam

Next government go sir TINUBU

The day Tinubu will be persecuted and sent to jail will be a libration testament to our political system and every other politician will have fear before stealing a dollar. But I don't know if it will ever come.

Chidex50:
Stupid man,wetin Igbo do you.Are you in a way better than an Igbo man? Or do you and your Tribe possess anything extra ordinary? I don't know why some people still think they're better than some people in this present dispensation?

Pls just leave him so he won't turn this thread to a tribal one

neoclassical:
It remains Tinubu, the CEO, Bullion Van Transport Company of Nigeria

If he can actually be convicted and wear the prison uniform then we start clamouring for these heads you mentioned here. Let's wait and see

You can either choose to be besties forever or sexmates.you can't have both because the moment he sleeps with you with everything he knows about you just know that bestie is over. He can never stay faithful to you even if you shoot your shot. So my advise is just allow him to date your friend and continue ur friendship with him.

tetula123:
the girls face is all over Twitter. Hopefully she denies it. It might be a set up.

I thought so as well