She is too gullible, how can a human being in the name of being a pastor have final say on your relationship or marriage. What happens if he is wrong or makes the wrong choice for you? If she truly loves you, she has to stand by you through thick and thin and not allow a fellow human to scatter your relationship.

LikeAking:


It has never ended well. U can ask men u have done that shit in the past. The moment u become too nice and house boyish to ur wife/GF, then it's time for her to dump and get a real man.

A real man to many women, is an evil man, bad man. If she is sick make she go stay for hospital make I know say she really dey sick.

You may be speaking from experience but I also have seen this which I wrote and can confidently tell you that it didn't end their union or cause problems as stipulated, instead it strengthens their bond even more.

It is not always so as you think, my younger sister is married to a man who stays in USA and didn't rush their wedding planning but took it step by step. This year alone he has come back 2 times and is planning to return this week. People are different and do things differently. He has successfully processed and gotten American passport for 2 of his children and about to get same for the remaining 2 and his wife.

Personally I don't see anything bad in helping my wife or girlfriend in doing house chores, as it makes the chores go faster and even easier for her. There is nothing like woman wrapper in it. She is a helper and not a slave. What happens when she is sick and unable to do the chores, will you go outside to get someone else to do them for you or force her to do them.

I have a question to ask you, did the two of you date or court before talking of marriage? I am sure if you dated or courted her, you would have seen this things which you are complaining of here. I will state categorically that you had very good restraints (shock absorber) as a man and did not hit her since. No body born of a woman will sit idly and listen to someone rubbish or talk about their parents during quarells with anyone. You struck her for including your mother in the issue that concerns the both of you and not because she talks to you anyhow or shouts on you which is also a disgrace in public. The deed has been done and you need to calm yourself down. You said you are tired of the marriage, if she too is feeling same, it is best for the two of you to separate so as to avoid bloodshed.

Personally I do not think it is disrespectful as he said it out of anger because you barged into the bathroom where he was naked. How would you have felt if it was reverse the case (I.e how would you have felt if he worked into the bathroom if you were naked and bathing?

My brother since you budgeted 6.6 milion some weeks ago and you feel that it would not be enough, add extra 3 or 4 million making it round figure of about 10 million. It should be enough.

A beautiful and lovely Birthday celebration to you fellow July Born, your life will be full of love, happiness, peace, fulfilment and all your heart desires.

So because you bought her sharwarma on your first date, you are expecting sex as a return? Well expect it same time you bought it for her in the next 2 years.

SteadyGrinding:


Yes. Thanks so much sir.

Glad I could be of assistance.

Since you have confirmed that you have contracted an STD which according to what you wrote is from her. I believe that it is treatable and if she confirms that she is truly infected, the two of you should start treatment immediately. As you said she has been with you through thick and thin, and dumping her like that over this is will be unfair to her, I believe that the best thing to do is for the love you have for each other commence treatment together.

What are your reasons for wanting to stop extending cash assistance to her? The only reason you gave is for her not to take you for granted. There is nothing wrong in helping your sister despite her degree in School, she is your blood and as you mentioned, she is pregnant and also married. It is bad if you stop helping her the way you can.

Most houses in Lagos do not have lightning protection and earthing, which prevents the power from the lightning from destroying your expensive electrical gadgets. A typical lightning carries as much as 300 million volts of electricity and the maximum voltage of any electrical appliance is 240 volts. So compare and contrast. To answer directly, your compound or building should get a good lightning protection system.

ImaIma1:


You should never try delving into counselling whether in church or elsewhere. Because your non stop and prying questions are enough to send the person back into a shell.

It seems these questions I asked her might put me in trouble. How can I withdraw it?

Higgies:

She said you should not judge. Are you blind or just st**
Mr questioner. Over sabi
Now you won't let us hear the full story.

I wasn't asking the question so as to judge her, only to be able to answer her questions.

This issue is a very painful one, but the deed has been done and there is nothing anyone can do about it. You need to focus on yourself and your current marriage, trying from time to time to see him (your son). Goodluck.

Your write up is very simple and straight forward. You made him understand your stand as it concerns being in a relationship with him which he took as you playing hard to get, and in the end it was shown finally to him. You did nothing wrong, you made your choice.

First thing to do is confirm if actually what she heard about him having children outside their matrimonial home with another woman after telling her to use family planning as a newly wed. If she confirms the authenticity of the fact, she has to do all she can to stop that plan he has to run away to another country with the children and the other woman. What ever it takes, as the act itself is an act of utmost wickedness to her. How can you tell your newly wedded wife to use family planning when she should be focused on conception? Why bother getting married to her in the first place when you had a plan to abandon her here and elope to overseas with another woman which I am sure you must have met before instructing your wife to use family planning.

I don't know why most guys don't want to learn from the mistakes of others. How can you impregnate a girl you are not married to? You have been having s3x with her using protection for a long time and you were not satisfied. You decided to go raw so according to you it will be sweeter than honey, but you forgot to apply withdrawal method. Now the result is out and you are here asking what to do. Did you invite us when you were planting the seed? Now that the deed has germinated, you are now inviting us. My brother go and look for land to sell and carry out her marital rights. You are the architect of your own problem.

I understand what you are saying and your concerns, but as much as I do not want to blame you for this your present condition, you still have questions to answer. Firstly, why did you allow someone who you know is not your husband to impregnate you? I know you are an adult in your late twenties, but did you think about this type of problem or situation before the did was done? How are you sure that the person you sent mails to will come back knowing fully well what he has done? Even if he does come back, are you sure he will take responsibility for you and the child? You know the type of parents you have and still allowed such to happen to you. Since you've decided to keep the child, you have to inform your mum first on your present condition telling her everything without leaving anything out. She will tell you how to take the issue to your father. You said you know the family of the guy, to me it is not advisable to take it to them or informing them as they will never believe you. They might even convince their son to do same. Go to your mum as I told you, if eventually he comes back and is ready to take responsibility for your combined action ( you and him), fine and good.

Your uncle was the cause of his own problem. He knew he adopted a son which by right is his own son from the day he was adopted. Your uncle would have written a Will, stating who has what. If he did it this problem wouldn't have come up. Your towns people who are fighting for the biological children of your uncle, what do they stand to gain by sending the adopted son of their late brother out all because of his father's properties? First thing is first, he should release the twins that were arrested and bury their father whose properties they are fighting for. After the grieving period, they should meet, both biological and adopted children to discuss a way out of this mess. As per tradition, what the first son has is just the house built by the father ( accomodating his siblings till they build their own houses.

Talk to him on normal brother things, avoiding your secrets as he can't keep them.

When you started noticing the strange behavior and distancing, did you find out from him the reason for it? Now concerning the wedding, I have to agree with everyone else who advised you not to attend. If you are friends with his wife on Social media, you can send her congratulatory message on either 18th evening or Friday morning.

DryMouth:

Idiot...
This is a public forum and anything can be posted.
Visit reddit and other forums and see for yourself.

Am not gay tho.

Reddit is not a Nigerian forum or platform, such could be encouraged there, but should be discouraged here.

A person that posts such a rubbish on this forum should be banned for life. You can live your life the way you want but never bring it to a forum of this type, it is disgusting and disgracing for a young man in his senses to post such a trash. Mods please ban this fool.

I believe they must have interviewed him, so as to get to know him and his intentions towards you. They must have told him that he was not good enough for you or that he is not qualified enough to be around you. It killed his moral and rather than talk to you, he decided to go with what he was told. Everyone has encouraged you to talk to him so as to find out why he said he is not good enough for you. You need to know why, and bear in mind that one thing is sure which is your parents will never accept that he is good enough for you most especially your mom.

The fact that she moved her things out of the house back to her parents and you not sending her packing herself, is to be settled by her moving her things back by herself the same way she moved them out. You do not need to go there to carry her things. According to tradition, it is the man that can send his wife packing only due to infidelity from her and not the woman moving out her things. If you have older relatives confirm from it.

When this news came out, I was asking what killed her calling this forum liars. People called me names, seeing me as a problem and a leach. Now the truth is out and confirmed as fake news.

Honourable2003:
Good evening nairalanders

I read a news here on nairaland where a man send her wife back to her Father's house just because the woman is not Virgin
Now my question is Does virginity really matters when considering marriage or even a relationship??
Candid opinion, feel free to say your mind
No bulling pls...

It depends on people. The story you are referring to, she lied to her husband that she is a virgin. That lie alone must have angered him apart from the fact itself.

Islandlady:
Good men like you are rare sha! She is lucky to have you
Most men don't give a f**k

Thanks for the compliment, she knows that we are lucky to have each other.