₦airaland Forum

MissWrite:
First, this might not be true for all men who cheat; and for those that do fall into the category, I think those men are best suited to answer this question. But if I were to hazard a few guesses I would say......

1. Bride-Price: Some men erroneously feel that they own their wives after paying the bride price. In their minds, she's been paid for in full to perform her duties to him and so he shouldn't have to sweat to make her cum.

2. The Madonna-Wh.ore Complex: Some men cannot respect a woman and be sexually aroused by her at the same time. They marry the women they respect (the Madonna) because they may make better partners and mothers (in their opinion). But they put them on a pedestal and cannot treat them as sexual objects. They would rather sexualize the mistress.

3. Ego: Some of these men date mistresses half their age; and if she's impressed by his performance, it would be a feather to his cap. He knows he's in competition with a younger dick; and even though he might have the advantage of deeper pockets, he would still like to be regarded a stud. Mistresses are also more likely to spread the word than the wives.

4. Over time, they just take their wife's sexual needs for granted. They see her busy with the kids, work and chores; she may not have the time to get sexy very often and so, they stop seeing her that way.

The Madonna-Wh.ore complex is worth a research.

Tried my hands on Fisherman's soup... enjoy!

Happy new year everyone.

crackhaus:
I have a feeling the man whom Ese Ifeta was caught with on the second week of February 2012 at Erho-Abraka also goes by the same surname Ifeta.

All of them are relatives.

You mean it's more of a incest fest?

If so, are such things public knowledge?

How can vigilante catch your husband's mistress with another man and bring her to your home? What stake does she have? What has she done wrong?

The last I remembered, a mistress is not answerable to her lover publicly

Is the wife sure that the girl is not her husband's daughter?

The husband and 'lover' even have same initials

ShaqFu:
How? Obviously, if a woman marries a man who is rich, even if she's poor, by virtue of her marrying that man, her poverty level will reduce, it can't stay the same, can it?.

What is the role of a husband?
What is the role of a wife?

Macgreat:
Pardon,

What I meant is this;

Your great grand parents who when to the farm. Your great grand mother went farming, right? Working along side your great grand father. In this scenario, is it the man that is providing for the family all by himself working in the farm. Has nature not showed us that women are and should be co - provider along side their man.

Did nature also show you that husbands are co-caretakers of the home?

Daboomb:
Jayzus Christ!

How do things get to this stage and nobody can take corrective action?
I can imagine what you are going through...l mean, even l, a ,man, cannot fart in front to my wife or even my children, it will be so embarrassing but we all fart and know to excuse yourself to some place where you can do it discreetly!
Common courtesy demands that you don tleave the En Suit Toilet door open and allow the smell of defecation to return back into the bedroom! Infact, you must open the windows and use deodorant immediately any of use use our common En Suit bath/toilet, so as to keep it clean for your spouse!
And I will find it very disrespectful if even my eldest son uses my Jug to drink!
Everyone in the house will tell you , "That is Dad's Jug, drop it down". No stories
We all have our plates and personal things that we all respect and wont use that of others.... and there are more than enough of such stuffs anyway so, there isno need to use what others are "used to suing". It is an unpsoken rule that we all observe.
I cant imagine my wife using my own plate to serve a visitor. The kind "red eye" l will throw in her direction sef, she will know that a line has been crossed.

As to the walking unclad within the house, if it is just two of you in that house and there is "extreme privacy" ....l wouldn't mind if l were you but then, when you dislike a woman to the point two of youare right now, the things that are supposed to trip you, will be so annoying to you!
She is just not appealing to you anymore.
When we really dont have anything to do on a weekend, me and my wife can be inside our "honeymoon space" (as we call our Master bedroom) from the previous night till 4pm in the evening! naked all through! Sleep, sex, wakeup, drink sole liquids, sleep, sex, talk, e.t.c, just the two of us (children know not to knock more than once, if not opened, then they use the intercom to say whatever they want and then bleep-off).
Husband and Wife must have their private and quiet times always, to BOND further.
But when "love dont live hear-anymore, it is another story!

If your wife asks for what SHE KNOWS both of you cant afford, then tell her to increase her work and income so she can afford it herself.
You should not steal just to satisfy the avarice of your spouse or kill yourself while trying to. That is not love. Love shhould be understanding and protective of the other spouse and not push them too hard.

As itis now, what do oyu think can be done to re-awaken this love that died or did you not love her at some times in the past?
Does she do all these things back then?
marriage is a very serious matter than can make or mar both of you so it has to be handled with some determination and effort.
For eample, when you talk to her about farting in your presence, what is her response?
Is it that she finds nothing wrong in that behaviour (probably due to fualty upbringing, some homes dont see it as anything wrong)
Have you tried to educate her on the need for respecting others, even your spouse, to keep certain things private and not cause odiferous odour to return back into the Master Bedroom? Whats her reaction?

Can she change?
can other women talk to her?
What about her parents, when things are really getting out of hand, can they be of help or is it a case of "bad in-laws worse than a bad wife""?

I dont like couples to break over matters that can be resolved, it really brings me down.
Both of you are at an age when you should begin to really enjoy each others company

Are you lastpage?

Balkan:
Let me be honest with you, l am married for ten years now. The atitude your guy is giving you is exertly what l give my wife

In my own case, it started well but there so many things she does that l dislike which l told her that it irritates me but she always nags why l tell her that.

1. She is always unclad in the room. I mean always. She never covers herself.
2, When ever she inters the toilet to poo she never shuts the door of the toilet in our room.
3 She always fart in front of me
4 She always ask for things she knows we cant afford.
5 She does not give me any spacial attention eg. No saperation of things l use from the things everbody use in the house like plates and cups

So many littles things that matter to guys she does not observe them and when l bring them up, she will tell me that l hate her.

The truth is that l dont get errection again when l see her. So to make love to her is difficult because l dont get erection. But when l see ladies she is much more finer than, my dick stands

We hardley sit to talk because she irritates me. But l am just praying for God to help me. I am not ready to marry another woman. But the love is dead. She does not respect me bc l cant perform but l cant take vigra for her because l am BP patient.

She is in her 30s and l am in my 40s

But she is just a pretty lady with good sense of dressing. A dream of every man but worths nothing to me

Hmmmnn

Boss13:
No she did not forget. She deliberately ignored it and portrayed a story to describe the husband as the wicked one. These are the whips of women; to obscure facts and present fictions in order to attract sentiments.

Don’t wallow in pity for this woman, she is the architect of her own situation. When you hear from the husband on this same matter, you may regret the comments you have previously made.

Do you know this couple offline?

GraGra247:
All the things you listed points to one thing and one thing mainly:

Your husband has developed chronic dislike for you.

Finding out the cause is now left for you.

100% agree

cococandy:
Aww thanks for the compliment

Yes I had loads of fun. I woke up early to cook so I was done by 1:00pm and took a small nap before the party started at 3.

Side note: I used to work in a fast food kitchen in Nigeria when I was in imsu. That’s where I learned to cook many things at the same time and fast too.

Interesting

So for instance, can you break down how you cooked all that stuff with different bases i.e. not like 3 soups with same base where you prepare the base and portion to 3 to cook the actual soups.

Grabs a seat.

Mindfulness:
I have been cooking for two days now, from dusk till dawn. I need to eat and relax, eat and relax, eat and relax and repeat this cycle for three days.

Pele

Merry Christmas

cococandy:
Christmas party at my house.
I cooked all of these.

Nigerian fried rice
Hawaiin fried rice
Corn bread
Egusi soup with pounded yam
Meat pie
Puff puff
Turkey
Grape jelly meatballs

I’m tired that’s for sure.

Weldone o! The meals look as fresh as you are

I can see your Christmas is very merry.

Compliments.

GooD one.

Learning to accept what they can't change in good fate.

The ineptness of NPF aside, children are trained early to watch the company to keep (except they are the bad company).

18yr old dating the kind of guy who parties and has a gun?

Ladies, be careful and sensible.

Not all that glitters is gold

Odianose13:
There are many questions to this story. Walahi. I dont believe the whole truth has been said.

1. If she was entirely innocent, she didn't have a family for 6 years, to fight for her from the outside? A lot of NGOs today can go through any length to fight the cause of a woman. So she was not visited by anyone for 6 years?

2. Was it the same IPO for 6 years?

3. Was she truly his girlfriend or a prostitute who was taken home for a night stand at that point in time?

4. Is the boyfriend released or still in jail?

5. The police would never believe when the dude said she never knew anything about the gun. It should not be surprising if the police thinks she
is an accomplice.

6. A lot of convicted female prisoners (even after trial) face these sexual abuse, are we sure the sex advances by the IPO was actually related
to the case, or empty promises just to have a piece of her.

Case transferred to SARS Ikeja and charged for Conspiracy/Armed Robbery. Though the boy confessed to be a cultist and also told them Amanda knows nothing about the gun or know his cult activities.

Last week, Amanda was freed after Six (6) years Awaiting trial, boyfriend convicted for Unlawful Possession of Fire Arms.

7. If the boyfriend was convicted, that means her case was also brought up to the jury and a decision was made by a judge in a court of law
since both of them were arrested for the weapons possession. Are you saying, she was found innocent and the IPO undermined the court
rulings and also the IPO took her case personally to witch-hunt her

8. If she was transferred to other units, was it the same IPO all the way?


The way the NGO dude has attached every instance of her name to 'Beautiful", i only hope he will not be another randy IPO.

Wa gba yi, wa se re.

I wonder what the posters on this thread will think two plus years later.

Hindsight is .....

Hmmmmmmm

Babes is mixing up ejaculation with male organsm.

makydebbie:
And what do you know about me living paycheck to paycheck? Gerrof my mention.

1. The Saint guy gave a generic opinion you personalized.

2. I agreed with his generic opinion and expanded it without personalizing it to you.

3. The fact you think we are both referring to you tells me you live from paycheck to paycheck. Your response to my initial quote tells me why.

Good day.

Pidgin2:
You need to go for counselling, you are not managing your family properly, your wife is suicidal because of the way you treat her

Hmmmm....

A wife who spends rent money without an ironclad reason (like the child is dying) and husband's consent im this economy is extremely wicked.

OP should report her to her family and drop her there for Christmas till she is ready to disclose what's chasing her (if any because it could be a stunt to garner pity) and what she spent the money on.

makydebbie:
You know, I don't appreciate it when dumb people display their stupidity on my mention.

Wannabe don't be original. You'll forever be known as the child who tried so hard to imitate nwamaikpe and failed.

He is very correct as painful as it sounds.

It simply means the person is living paycheck to paycheck.

Such a person can't be rich.

Cc: Saintsammurai.

@OP: nice one.

Happy birthday Iyawo Toonice, God bless you and family.

sassysure:
Half population of the males we see around will want to do something to get a better prik cos it kill's their image a lot when the power house looks funny. The reason all those drugs for such sells like hot cake. Yet the ladies haven't crucified them for that. If a woman want change especially after undergoing pregnancy change,she is free to do so.

Lots of u (assuming u are a guy) droll on nicki minaj image or Kim cos why? Even when u know they are mostly fake? Why not droll over Asa and her likes.
Beauty sales for everybody. If u hv the money to do it,be it man or woman,go ahead.

I am not sure the outcry is on the actual surgery as opposed to the stupidity of filming it for us.

If I remember correctly, Kim Kardashian the queen of reality TV has constantly denied she had any surgery done. She shows us everything without saying anything.

Madam Caroline Danjuma laid low for 2 months and came back with a transformed body due to 'squats'.

Tonto isn't so active and could take 3 months, do her surgery, top it off at the gym and resume with her new bod..... afterall, we saw her at the gym.

The world doesn't want to see you poo.... the want to admire your healthy body (which is due to pooing when due.)

Reality TV is to redeem your image not pummel it further.

These women should learn.

She looks much better in the multicolored dress.

Kudos for trying to give Jam Jam a 'normal' life.

Lovely hair, lovely makeup. Lovely skin.....

Lovely pictures.

Gungnir:
i am not even pandering to the sarcasm of the women, but why will you go to an exclusive party without finding out who the organizers are and what for? if na ritual things nko?

100% agree.

Forget rape, what if it was an initiation party or they were ritualists?

People need to be really careful.

I have been in stitches since.....

I admire that he can relax and actually do this for his party....

He must really be someone who is not held back by obstacles..... He sees no impossibilities.

Good one sir.

Reminds me of my CEO.

crackhaus:
Okay thanks.

You're welcome

eyinjuege:
Being uneducated doesn't make you a lowlifer, doesn't make you crass, doesnt mean you'll be a wrapper tying, chewing stick chewing, razz person. Provided you have worked on yourself.
Its all about individuals and not about how much of an education you have.
I will always use my tailor as an example. Beautiful woman, dress sense is top notch, her demeanour probably only associated with royalty, the way she carries herself alone. You just have to respect her. Her speech is equally good. Ever keen to learn and all her children went to gòod universities. She is a blessing to her husband, not a liability.
And a lot have people talking of class here have mothers who never saw the 4 walls of a university, and parents who probably grew up in poverty, but made something of their lives.
Some of them have parents who are still struggling to care for them , probably tired and exhausted from bearing all the responsibility of a grown 20+ adult, yet they have the audacity to look down on a woman who has a skill she's using to fend for herself and not depending on mama thank you.
Some ladies are waiting for a man to continue from where their parents stopped, and are probably wondering why the man in question should pick an illiterate over them.
He knows what he saw in her, he should be allowed to marry whoever he wants. I'm sure he's dated other educated women in the past, but there's something about this one that has held him captive. Respect his decision. His parents should get to know the girl.

Your tailor is ever keen to learn and carries herself with class i.e. doesn't behave like someone who is not educated. She has to leave her class and polish herself to a higher standard to fit her spouse.. She also ensured her kid's went to good schools to give them the leverage she didn't .... i.e. she is not your average tailor or have the mindset of an average tailor.

You are bringing up outliners.

Bill Gates dropped out of school and is the richest man yet we know that it is not realistic for a child to drop out of school in the hope of becoming the next Bill Gates.

The class here is not primarily money; it is an individual's outlook to life as a whole which comes as a result of experience and upbringing/socialization.

I am a firm believer of not mixing classes; I think that was one principle our fore father's used during match making and procuring spouses for their kids.

Using myself as an example, I can not marry your average mechanic (no matter how wealthy) or a Governor's son.

We all have different value system.

crackhaus:
1. I'm guessing you already formed a conclusion about this particular lady not improving herself over time.


2. Honest question, how did this Deola Sagoe start out?
I hear her name a lot but know next to nothing about her.

1. No conclusions really

2. 'Deola Sagoe has entrepreneurship in her blood, coming from a prominent family of Nigerian entrepreneurs and owners of the Elizade Group.

She studied Business Administration at the University of Miami and returned to Nigeria to get a Masters Degree in Finance and Management from the University of Lagos.

Deola's mother had been running a small tailoring house called Odua Creations which was known for producing meticulously embroidered traditional Nigerian menswear. In 1989, Deola joined her mother with a view of expanding the label's repertoire to encompass more contemporary designs for the ever-developing, cosmopolitan Nigerian society. The following year, Deola began designing under her name'

Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deola_Sagoe

It's like using Beyonce as a standard for black women.

cruchenutii:
Biko, what has Education got to do with Religion or fetish activities? This is the first time i'm seeing this. That's why I quoted.

Japan, India & China has the world's best brains & they are ravished with Religious & fetish activities. They have the Best Computer programmers, Medical Doctors & Engineers in the Whole world excluding Russia & Germany.

India has 79.8% of the population practicing Hinduism and 14.2% adheres to Islam, while the remaining 6% adheres to other religions.

China is the country with the largest population of Buddhists, approximately 244 million or 18.2% of its total population Also Japan is not left out.

So I disagree with your statement, Charm or Juju (as I know it) is NOT a respecter of your Education or Queens English.

Illetracy has nothing to do with religion

My bros, I weak that;'s why I quoted that moniker.