₦airaland Forum

Amhappy:
@Lateralmaths you are a good counsellor. However there are no two methods for everyone. A collegue told me a painful story of how her brother's wife died. She was this dovey loving,submissive and humble type to the extent that she was condoning her husband's bad behaviours ;infidelity and keeping late nights even to the dismay of her MIl and Sil. She saw it as a way to get into his heart and stop his bad ways. To cut the long story short,the husband mistress killed her and now he is married to that woman.

Timbuktou:
1. Pretty sure. Do you want to give up the freedom of cleaving to one woman? You can be open to her and share your fears without barriers. Imagine having to open up to Shade, Titi, Chioma, Halima... haba

2. Nah, that's all on David. He didn't bond with his kids. They were basically fatherless. The man was all over the place fighting wars and claiming territories. No father figure at home. Was Isaac polygamous? Remember what his only wife did to him and her own child? Rebekah was acting out a script written by God Just how Judas was acting a script too

3. Oh, please. What stopped him from seeking redress? He understood the implications of the "scam" and went along for another seven years. Haba. That's a sharp brother, right there. What redress? After sleeping with her? He couldn't divorce her because she was a virgin. The options were to marry Rachael or forget her. He loved her and was still willing to go for it after been scammed. Jacob hated Leah (first wife) that's why God gave her babies and according to Isrealite customs, you cannot stop sleeping with your wife or providing her clothes even if you 'hate' her and have a second wife. Remember Moses was not born and there was no provision for divorce

4. Na diabetes kill dat one. Too mush of everything is bad. Lols

5. It was what it was. It wasn't anything to do with polygamy or monogamy. Remember Isaac, Lot? Lot was greedy and fearful; he chose the best lands for himself without consideration for Abraham and when the Angels told him to run to the hills, he limited himself and requested to stay in small village instead. If he went to a town, his daughters would have looked for some one else to bang. Issac (what happened to him apart from the barreness of his wife? and the son's/mother's deceit? Remember that God doesnot love Esau and loves Jacob and destined him to be above his brother? If Rebekah/Jacob did not do that, something else would have happened) Ori Esau gba bode noni

6. I stand a chance, then. . You're such a beacon of hope. Unfortunately for you, your are not gunning for bukatyne's heaven

Timbuktou:
1. Nah, no first or second. Just play your role and stop looking about.

2. Thanks for being gracious.

3. So, it would seem

4. Hehehehe. Succeeded, eh?

cococandy:
who told you killing is bad?
Who told you prostitution is a sin?

Children of God did it in the past so you don't have to be in doubt

Timbuktou:
2 Cor 13:8. Polygamy is the truth.

Kedam:
love your preaching

Timbuktou:
Maybe we should revert to the commandments that existed before the fall then, and scrap the ten commandments. Life would be much simpler that way. I don't want polygamy, I just take exception to being lied to. Monogamy favours only women, whereas, polygamy would favour both genders. I've said this before, I would teach my sons to make their choices.

Per God bending the rules, I notice He does that for His anointed. They're allowed to break the rules, no? I mightIII have to get anointed to get free passes to commit things like murder, after all, all I stand to lose is my baby at infancy.

DickDastardly:
No long thing..........here goes below

1. Occasionally going to Mama Ngozi's Beer Palour with him.

2. Watching Football games with him no matter how boring they are.

3. Helping him to pick sure games on Nairabet and soccer pools.

4. Opening the door in time for him in time when he partied or clubbed came back late.

5. Understanding with him and giving him breathing space when he says his head is filled!

6. Petting and caring for him when he is inebriated till he comes to!

7. Buying him stuff like lovely ash tray and stupor vomit bucket on his special days!

8. Cutting down on street gossip and nagging.

9. Going out pantless with him and grabbing a quicky @ weird places to blow his mind.


You can add yours

Lateralmaths:
a husband should love first before the wife submits?

Sophyrocks:
Buhahhahahahaha.

Oh dear.

Timbuktou:
Hmm. Let me try to wriggle my way outta this.

When I say I don't believe in love, what I mean is, people don't love and expect nothing in return, which is unconditional love. So, if as a husband, I show/practise love to my wife I expect her to show me love/submission in return.

Also, her submission to me isn't out of a desire to submit for the sake of it or her love for me but, to have a happy home, a "loving", happy husband, etc.

The point at which we realise that our love/submission will not bring the desired results; a loving husband, a submissive wife, is when marriages tend to break down.

Even when the marriages do not break down, we tend to play our roles in a bid to experience a change of fortunes for the better/status quo. Perhaps, our spouses might see the error of their ways because I'm playing my part, blah blah blah. Gettest thou, I, sis?

Sophyrocks:
And adultery is totally prohibited in the bible. It is even a criteria for those who want to be in the kingdom of God. People will mention solomon, abraham, david and co but will forget the consequences of their polygamy. God allowing men of those days to marry more than one wife does not mean he is in support. Just because God has not destroyed satan does not mean he is in support of satan. That was why he sent Jesus to set the records straight and jesus had to repeat it again that a man must have only one wife and they will become one flesh. Not one man and many wives. None of the christians then in jesus time married more than one wife. Greed no go allow them hear word.

Timbuktou:
The wisest man who ever existed.

lilmax:
tell that to solomon

Timbuktou:
I'm curious, though, why did God not speak against when His servants engaged in blatant polygamy? Separate law for them? Perks of serving God, as in, deeper level of grace?

Timbuktou:
Christianity does not preclude polygamy. God doesn't frown at polygamy. By the way, happiness is selfish.

Sophyrocks:
Even people that wed in church will still argue with you. Look at the Op na. He is one of them. When they are saying their vows, isnt faithfulness included?

vkoni:
hello all.
i am a career woman doing night duty most of the time,i presently do not have an househelp/nanny for fear of wat might be going on wen im not around.Going for night duty leaving my kids, with my hubby and housemaid brings so much tots to my mind.wat do i do?Not even this era of hubby and househelp digging it while u er not there.Really so afraid

cococandy:
No he doesn't live to keep his wife happy.
Neither does his wife live to keep him happy.

If having extra women will make him happy, then fine.
If extra men will make the wife happy, fine too.
As long they are both happy, it doesn't matter what they do to each other and how they treat each other to achieve their personal selfish happiness.

Ojoariyo:
Dtz the kind of relationship I wanna share but my gf always get angry when I try to help in the kitchen.

Timbuktou:
No such thing exists, whether in heaven or earth. No, I don't believe in it.

cytochromeC:
My thought exactly. This picture up here is so not recent. Annie and her accomplice should try something else.

cherryice:
None that am serious with

cherryice:
Thanks alot

cherryice:
thankz for the concern. Hes takinf responsibility of our kid. But we not together

Timbuktou:
You're not married. Come back and share the results of unconditional love after your tenth year of marriage. Goodbye

dre11:
Hum
Omotala married at the age of 18years and she still keeps her marriage till now
I know a lot of ladies that married at 19 and 20 and still use wisdom to keep their home because they are matured in that aspect


Also, I know of ladies that married at 30 and their homes aren't no more

When u talk about maturity..... Age plays little part on it but its you, experience, upbringing, information and capacity to develop faster in all hemisphere.

cherryice:
Ok! Here's it. When I was in school, I got entangled in this relationship with this well, sweet guy. We were so in love and we both thought we had it all. Along the line, I got pregnant and wanted to terminate it buh he told me I shouldn't bcoz he was already making plans for our settling down. I believed him never knowing he was the devil's advocate. Anyways time went on, nine months later, I delivered of this bouncing baby boy which I still cherish today and asked God for the forgiveness of wanting to terminate my child at first. Okay...few months before I put to bed about 3months, my boyfrend started acting weird. He wouldn't pick my calls nor return it, he ignored my texts, I was so confused and felt like dying. I visited his place and asked him what was going on but he kept saying nothing and that he had a lot of pressure at work. I believed him and told him everything was going to be fine but I needed him to be there for me this time as my parents were unaware of my condition. He said it was okay and that he was sorry too. We kiissed and made lovve again that day and I left.


Two weeks after, there was no change still. Infact things became worse. His lines were nolonger going through. I knew some of his friends who I made enquiries from and that was when I found out my bf had relocated to the US. I couldn't believe it! That was when my world crumbled and I decided to give up on men except my only source of joy, my son. I begged his frends to help me wt his contacts but all said they didn't have his new cell number and that when it dawned on me that I was on my own. I cried day and night, wasn't eating rght. I kept prayinn he was gonna call me someday before I put to bed buh he never did. As God would have it, I put to bed safely and it was a handsome baby boy.


I moved on with life afterwards after settling with my parents. I startd life all over again as a single mother. I left school, got a wellpaid job. My son too was doing well with school and I was happy.

I got to my office one morning few days ago and when I was less busy decided to log into my YIM_ I saw I had a new invite, accepted it and this guy and I got talking. He talked like he knew me, and along the line he told me who he was, my baby father! I logged out hurriedly cos my heart racing fast. I didn't knw what to do, I noticed tears run down my cheeks, I quickly cleaned up and re-made up cos I was having a meeting. I left for the meeting and from there went home. When I got home, I picked up my phone again and logged into YIM and saw loads of msgs he had dropped for me. He was asking after his son and asking for my number. I refused replying, he kept sending in messages, I was just reading em wtout replying. Sum of it all, he said he wants a comeback..

I have never been this confused. I know I said I've given up on men, I don't know why I'm still having this feelings which I donot want to have for him. I'm hating myself for having this feelings right now. Please nairalanders, I really do need your help on this.. Do u think I should accept him back despite the fact he left me and his son? Do you think he's sorry enough? Do you think I'll be hurt afterwards if I go back?

Men are wicked!