₦airaland Forum

ROCKSTAND1: She is depicted as an all-rounder. A mother, wife and resourceful home keeper. There's nothing new under the sun, a man's primary role in the home is not to wash plates. If he must do so it should be by choice not by force.

Witty07: Na wa o. Its hard ds days to undrstand where women belong to. The op is simply tryn to pass out a message that d wife should not earmark a domestc job for him. It is downgrading for men like... She is controln me.
Hope u undrstnd me.

kingphemy: Dear, you obviously like to argue (which is commendable). Lucky your husband. No man wouldn't like a wonderful session after a delicious Efo riro.
And as you said each to his own

LesbianBoy: Am sure the girl must be one of those FOOLISH girls that have the mentality ''On no account should a man or anyone HIT a woman no matter what she does'' am sure thats what gave her the ''liver'' to stab the man, because she felt nothing will happen to her because she is a woman! Looooool........Nairaland girls i hope you all can see, the girl was beaten to stupor and i am 200percent sure MAJORITY of people who beat her were MEN! Lmaooooo Anyways, IMO i think they didn't 'treat her fucck up' enough. They could have stripped her N.aked and start touching her, do nasty things to her (like they did one girl who stole Blackberry last year) before beating her to stupor! so that it will serve as a deterrent to other girls who feel they can harm men yet they don't want to be harmed.........RUBBISH!!!

kingphemy: Before we hug transformer together answer this: If you saw your son washing his wife's panties what will you do? Will you say 'well done my son'? Just like you used to say to his father? It is a taboo in our culture. I believed you are one of the culturally alienated-people. No matter how much you embraced the oyinbo culture, you can never be part of them.

Loving your wife, as a man, can be expressed another way such as providing financially for the family surely not by washing 'pata'.

The efo is making him fresher and fresher as you say but also making him rotten inside..!

1121: They are real muslim whose islamic knowledge has been blended with western education. Thats y they are not using hijab and putting on attire that makes u appreciate their beauty. There are many of them in ABU zaria.

Saksreal: Mark 12:29, "Jesus answered him, the first of all the commandments is; 'Hear O Israel, the LORD our GOD, the LORD is one".

GodzBELOVED: 1st Corinthians 7:13-14 >>>> And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her NOT leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband.

1st Corinthians 7: 16>> For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shall save thy husband? Or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?

My dear, the only thing you should do now is PRAY. You can't tell if God has destined you both to be together and if God is going to change him through you. You need to ask for God's direction. If God says, ''Go ahead'' then you can. But before u get married, make sure u settle things with him- you're not going to change to another religion so he has to know that. Again, I say unto you, PRAY! Shalom!

foliks: I am a christian lady dating a Muslim guy for about a year now,the guy has been everything a woman can ever ask for in a man. Before I met him I dated my first boyfriend for 5yrs but those years were the saddest years of my life and each time I try to leave,he comes back begging and another relationship.

I was supposed to have left me because he found out my first boyfriend is still around now my first bf is back begging again and has gone to beg my aunty. Now my aunty who is like my mum cos my biological mum is dead has refused to support my new relationship and even said I should give my ex another chance since my new bf is a Muslim and now we are not even speaking to each other because she feels my new relationship is the reason am not accepting him back...


I don't know what to do,please what do you advice

k2039: So you want to be boss

COOLDUN: If he resorted to beating his senior sister, then what is difference from her sister beating his wife? Mr. Evil supporter, as a peace maker he would have continued with the pleadings till he gets his sister’s heart calmed. Beating his sister meant that he had already taken side with his wife. I love my wife but never in the level of losing my family because of her, because she herself has a family which she will not like to lose too. His wife is a member of his family no matter what is going wrong in the family; all hands should be on deck to settle the matter and move the family forward. The question is this, now he has turned back to his family because of his wife, will his wife do the same to her family because of him?

Marriage is 90% family affairs and 10% personal. Your family, your wife’s family are all directly involved in your marriage, for you to make things match, you have to share your love between your both families. The wicked wife always jam the heads of her husband’s family together, separate her husband from his family, before she will embark on her wicked mission, when she knows that her husband will not be rescued by any one.

I love my wife and my family because all are important to me. One can marry many wives, but you cannot have other family members. I have come a very long, good, bad and ugly ways with my family. No one will ever separate us.

My love to my wife is agape, while my love to my family is unconditional. He has no right to beat up his senior sister, who might be another man’s wife because of his wife.

joymary7: the bible has notin to do wit this, as an elder sis to my bro i ensure he gets everytin he wants, our parents are nt rich but im married and i try to do a lot for him all tru his university education to his service yr to his day as a job seeker..... After all these sacrifise he beats me up becos of his wife? If i no kill am tht day i will curse his entire generation. Wife ko wife nii... I will never allow my husband beats any of his sis for my sake

Melmo: I just asked him if he's married or not and he said NO.
So when I meet his parents I will ask the appropriate questions.

warrior101: I would not only bite you, i would eat you... Like i said before you will know when it is time.
In the bible there are, simbols and figurative words, there are mysteries etc etc which needs to be interpreted to young minds like you. And there are also those write black and white, and in most cases need to be shown to young minds like you. This is because you young minds lack sense of proportion...

The bible say, wife respect your husband, husband love your wife. What is respect? Figure it out and tell me what you got in our next class.

warrior101: Your argument is baseless and childish... Which other half? Your must be delusional? You husband is another separate entity in the real scheme of things. The idea that you are one is figurative. Ok?

Now, i will advise you as an elder bros that i am to start respecting your husband and kneel down when necessary...
By the way what tribe are you? No offense o, just asking...

ROCKSTAND1: I totally agree with you. I help my wife as much as i can, and she even hardly allows me do stuff. Just recently i offered to make indomie for myself but she 'evacuated' me from her kitchen, so i had to go bath the kids and put them to bed. She currently works 8 - 5, taking an MBA plus the home responsibilities. Sometime ago i was abroad for only 4 days and everything literary grounded to a halt. The generator, the water pump, the lights in the children's room, her car even my maigard! On arrival i fixed EVERYTHING in one day. My point is that we all have our roles to play and no party should force their own roles on the other. The man's primary responsibility is not doing house chores, God never designed him like that. The man is created to protect his family both physically and spiritually, every other thing is secondary. Lions hardly hunt, they leave that to the lionesses but when the meal arrives they get the 'Lion's share'. Women are specially endowed with the strength to do their assignments which include house chores and child bearing. The problem of the Western world is that they have adulterated family values and distorted the very foundation of the home. This is what has lead to homosexuality, teen violence etc. [b]The virtuous woman in proverbs 31 was not a spirit yet her husband usually sat at the gates with the elders perhaps playing ludo.[/b]I pray never to be found wanting in any of my responsibilities to my family, in-laws, parents, siblings and even nation.

Flexskillz: I think what the OP meant is the woman making somethings HIS RESPONSIBILITY and I think that's totally wrong!
Its a Man's world wether you like it, believe it or not. And if you want your marriage to last you have to learn to respect that and treat your Man as the head of the home except of course you want to switch places.
I observed that too with my wife, I help a lot in the house and there are some things that after helping out with, I observe that even when She can do it, she will leave it and even remind me that I haven't done it and it just beats me.
Another TRUTH, as men we love our ego and you cannot take it away.
Its just the trend of late and things are changing, wayback women didn't even enjoy half of what our ladies of late are enjoying and they were Still happy, so I think if you have a husband that helps in the home you ought to be grateful and encourage Him rather that try to impose some things on Him, the male factor in him will always decline that.

kingphemy: You washed your wife's clothes..?
It seems like you've eaten 'vegetable soup'. Go for deliverance.
Lest I forget, wash the pants very well..!

Tomeseen: MEN, thou shall not pretend to be what you are not. What you won't take as a rich man, the best time to start rejecting it is when you are poor. Don't spoil her doing household chores you don't enjoy doing. Thats cheating

Why do we get married. Because we love our mate and want to care for our partner. That being said, there are duties and there are duties. Even if your husband is a chef, he is your head. Unless you are both in an arrangee marriage, both of you don't need to be told when your partner need care, or when your duty comes along.

My husband is 100% caring but he won't be caught dead in d kitchen 'cooking' the only time he did cook, when we were courting and i told him no fast food today, cook for me. He thought i had lost my marbles but i wasn't taking no for an answer. Yes he did cook the rice, it was a major disaster.

That said i didn't marry an insensitive man, if am too tired to cook, we either eat out or(eat anything close at hand or easy to rustle up)

I wash my clothes, his goes to the drycleaner, said they will be too much for me. If i take mine to the cleaners as well, he doesn't mind in so far as i don't work myself to death, but no can do i can wash my clothes thank u.

Cleaning the house is no big deal, i enjoy having neat surroundings and on those rare occassions that he pitchs in and help out cleaning or what have you. Am always so surprised and happy, its like as if am given a gift. Besides i thrash the house more than him. Am a seamstress, So u understand the plenty pieces of clothes everywhere.

For the women who married pretenders that cooks and clean before marriage, then suddenly stops after marriage. Take it or leave it, you already signed the dotted lines. For those who married men that geniuely loves helping out with the house chores, well i have this to say, i envy you.

Either way lets get off this topic and go for the man who cares and love you. He won't work you to death even if he can't help with the chores, he'll find a way to relieve you of that stress. Trust me thats true unless he didn't love you to begin with.

Lastly, financially my money is 100% mine while his money is our money Lol. I can contribute but my husband don't expect it and there isn't any slack. Way i figure, why contribute when there is no need for it. Nuff said Each to his own, abegi

auchs: chei! This is one of them. Hmmmm. A woman saying she is equal to the husband. men be wise! Marry who you love and like its character not working class. Money may not help you on somethings.

omiobo: 1 strategising
2 strategising
3 nobody,status
4 NO

991: who told you that men don't help in domestic chores? up til now i still wash my clothes, my wife's and that of the kids. I cook when my wife is tired, drive the kids to and from school daily. Thank God am self employed so i have time to care for my family.

ayo ade: Answers to 1& 2 is nothing.
Answer to 3 is my younger sisters
Answer to 4 is no, thats my responsibility not hers.

iv4fb: misplaced priorities

lukaino: Many times we hear women complain about men not helping out with any of the domestic chores and people are quick to conclude that such men are wicked and insensitive. I think men have reasons for not helping out. Mine for example is that all the times i tried to help out with something, my wife automatically makes it my duty every other time; she'll even remind me when i don't do it. I think one should help out of one's free will. Guys what are your reasons?

Witty07: You said he is your best friend,okay but if you were asked befor marriage what you want in ur husband, one key thing u will say is a man after God's heart. If you acknwledege God so much and He has commanded you to respect and reverence ur husband as the church do unto christ, why can't u symbolise it with kneeling down since he has taken after God

Witty07: You said he is your best friend,okay but if you were asked befor marriage what you want in ur husband, one key thing u will say is a man after God's heart. If you acknwledege God so much and He has commanded you to respect and reverence ur husband as the church do unto christ, why can't u symbolise it with kneeling down since he has taken after God