₦airaland Forum

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IPAKsGbqcg

Labadi69:
When I woke up to the fact that pastors are all crooks trying to use religion to obtain innocent people. I’d rather pray at home and give my tithes directly to the needy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IPAKsGbqcg

Streetpriest1:
Hey dear. Have a personal relationship with God and in ur relationship with him, try to obey him. U don't need to be in church everyday but build a strong foundation in ur life with the word of God.


God bless.

.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IPAKsGbqcg

Noise.

rollywise:
Keep running from truth. Is there any church where they teach robbery, fornication, killing and all the many vices It is your heart that chose to focus on the unnecessary and leave the cogent. Pastor cannot stop both good and bad from coming to church. You come to church and a phone is stolen by some bad ones and you say you will never come to church again. For such who do evil in God's hose, God said in the last day he will separate the wheat from grain. The Bible says we should not forsake the gathering of the brethren.

What will you do with the reasons?

Nahunger:
Many Christians have backslided from attending church service due to one reason or the other.

I am no here to judge, I only wish you can tell us your peculiar reason and hopefully someone might be here to advice you on what to do.

No one is perfect, we all learn from birth to death always have a open heart to the endless possibilities been alive.

Nigerians are conditioned to be heartless.

Not sure what you're expecting here.

I won't say mean things but I do think you should stop lamenting on the situation.

Focus on yourself and improving your life.

Ogbrave:
I am only human before being a man...we Africans derive pleasures in a fellow man's pain..How can some people ask me for her link? How can you insult my manhood and my person just because I feel bad and sad that a woman I once loved and lived with now acts blue film..I am not cussing on her..I am not wishing her bad or trying to get her back...I am only being emotional and venting my pains out..I am human..I pray you all laughing at me don't experience this..because in this part of the world empathy is lost...I don't get you all..is it a thing of joy and happiness that my ex now acts porñ? Am I supposed to be happy and proud about it? I am not begging her to come back or wishing her bad..I am just sad..money is my goal..and I must score my goal.!!

Waist beads are a part of culture.

They are also very useful in preventing excess weight gain.

SundayNightGist:
Honestly, I used to believe some things belonged to the red light district. Or is it just me? Seeing that I was raised a church boy with little to no experience chiking babes, I couldn’t imagine myself ever dating a girl that now makes me think twice. Like, am I now mad or what? How did I get here?

Since I met this my new girl, it’s just been as if the veil of "ignorance" is beginning to fall off my face; abi guy man don dey spoil go be that ni?

Or how else can I explain to this honorable forum that my current girlfriend, though a manager at her company, likes to wear waist-beads? I mean she even wears it to work!

Although I somehow like the sight of it on her waist, I just can’t get the idea of thinking she might be a corporate olosho out of my head. This thing is sowing seeds of mistrust in me and I really don’t know what to do again. And it’s not like I haven’t told her. Everytime I do she will just look at me with a side-eye, rub my head, and laugh briefly. Shey I never carry load wey no be my own like this? Abi na my mind? Make e no be say na person glory dey on the line so o. The thing dey fear me walahi.

Nairalanders please advise a brother urgently.

This is abuse. Emotional abuse...and you're enabling it.

Stop taking her calls. Communicate by texts only.

NAPTIP.

tooth4tooth:
.
From your statement , the bolded is the remaining avenue that needed exploration.

Make una dey marry person that can live within their means.

I am SURE you knew of her runs lifestyle before marriage.

Did she help the family stay afloat with the runs proceeds? That would be understandable (and is a common occurrence).

If it has gotten too much for you, be sure that you are financially buoyant before leaving. If she earns more per month, take her to court!

Alaji1220:
I need a very reasonable advice from this wonderful forum.

I got married close to a decade ago and the marriage is blessed with two kids.
Though things were tough at the beginning because wife lost her job and I bore the burden solely for 4 years, we had our st child 5 months after wedding andh the second 2 years later. Lost my job around the time our second kid arrived, we kept struggling with great hope. Around 2017 she connected me with a mam that help with an adhoc work in a recruiting firm, I got their within 2 months I helped madam to secured a marketing job, I managed with the job for like 8 months before it ended. Immediately it ended Madam began to behave funny let's I forget I sold my car to pay for her final year exam and also gave her money to get the certificate all amounting to 250k then. Around 2018 I was thrown back to the labour market and I was shown hell by wife, several calls of men, knew about 4 men through her watssap messages that she had affairs with I always get to see these whenever she fell asleep with her phone in her hand. 2019 I got back on my feet and I noticed she stopped the runs. Meanwhile she made so much money during the period of her escapades because of clients deposit that earned her bonuses at work but squadder a huge sum on travelings which were unsuccessful. She joined another financial institution this year and she handles client that need loan, 2 months after securing the job she started talking of getting car ordinarily I would have discouraged her but being someone that is always resolute in her decision making I quickly wade in so as to safe her from men that may want to take advantage of her as this has happened before I tried to inquire about the source of fund for the car she said she liase with a client to take loan that she will only pay back the principal portion that the client will pay the interest and she will be using all her salary to pay back, before we got the car I told her to go for a lesser car like 700k but she said it's 1m she budget for Nigeria used Toyota Corolla. But since we have got the car madam is so stressed up financially while I take care of all the bills even before she got the car she has not be helpful in the area of bill but only buy food stuff whenever she feels like but since she got the car she's still pestering me to be funding the maintenance of the car she drives to work everyday. I saw her chat with a man like 3 months ago and from the chart she was wooing the man for financial assistance, they arrange a meeting which I'm sure something must have transpired between them I confronted her and she promised not to see him again, my main pro is that in her new office some people around there know me we carried out maintenance work on the car recently that got her to online loan debt and I can observe that she was connecting with some men again for financial help, I got some messages confirming her promiscuity again and I confronted her she began to raise excuse here and there I was so mad with her that she thought I will beat her but thank God I didn't though we kept away from each other for 3 days but on getting home yesterday I discovered she had packed her loads and kids loads and left for her parents house and this should be her 4th time of doing this whenever we have misunderstanding. I love my kids but her attitude is making me to gradually loose the the love I have for these kids. I reported her to her mum she was kneeling down and begging me yesterday but for how long I'm I going to continue with this woman...

Please I need advice that will guide my decision, I only fear for those innocent kids future because she doesn't seem to care about their present well being though she claims all she is doing is to process traveling to secure their future.

Genuine people exist.

With genuine people comes genuine love, black or white.

Oboy don't you have old friends, even gfs?

Na to find one of your old friends that is working.

You don't have enough time to build something organic.

oldienavie:
I am actually avoiding the referral option, but how is church a bad place to get a wife, I understand there are pretenders even in church sha ?
By the way, I am not exposing my abroad status I am just laying low like a regular guy.

Lool.

You and Magnolia came to troll today.

siofra:
When you probably spent your youth trolling women on nairaland and saying you must marry a virgin?

Mba nu!!

Coming back with the express desire to find a wife leaves you vulnerable to wolves.

You're not too old so good luck.

oldienavie:
I clocked 36 years 2 months ago, I look fit for my age compared to many Nigerians(I realised most Nigerians dont pay attention to their physical fitness).
I have been outside of the country and just got back with the aim of trying to get a wife.
Am I too old to expect to find a decent woman ?
What suggestions do you have with regards to getting a good woman in the shortest possible time ?
Thanks all.

Very interested in this.

N30k is likely for full time work. The state will almost definitely argue that street sweepers are not full time.

Talk2david1:
Good evening nairalanders. I need an answer to the above question most preferably by the lawyers in this forum. Sometime ago, the President signed into law the new minimum wage of #30,000 but some employers especially private school owners still pay their staff as low as #10,000 monthly. Even here in calabar some weeks ago, the street sweepers were protesting for not being paid their '#7,500' salary for 6 months. My question is,
Does the #30,000 minimum wage apply only to government workers or are private employees suppose to adhere to this law also?
And in a case where you work in big Private school that makes up to 70 million in a term, can You sue your employer for paying less than the minimum wage without loosing your job or being fired?

With that power dynamic, very close to being R word.

ORBLIGHTS:
I JEZ HATE WHEN PEOPLE TALK ABOUT BLEEPING HOUSE HELP, MAIDENS, FEMALE EMPLOYEES ETC. IT PISS ME OFF

24 year old man is not a kid.

Instead of him to be living on his own, he's planning on getting a 19 year old child pregnant.

OdefaGirl:
You should focus on learning simple things in life like spelling of "cobwebs" before writing that piece of shit..... so we should praise you and give you a pat
Well I expect less from you, you still a kid bro... you've got nothing to worry about.

Did you submit?

Darasimis:
I believe this a good and alternative route for Nigerians. Am working toward submitting application in January 2020 by God's grace. I pray it worked out.

Quote my original statement.

"Sexual compatibility". Not "go and marry someone that has the exact same libido as you".

Kobojunkie:
I don't understand what you are getting at.
The above is from one of the articles

He is contemplating cheating which in my books marks an end. They may not get divorced or separated ("just" because he cheated but trust would be gone forever.

Kobojunkie:
The topic has nothing to do with ending ending relationship though so why are you even bringing this up here?

The Op is frustrated because he claims he is not getting enough sex from his wife... he expressed he has no intentions of ending it with his wife though.

People. An and sometimes should end relationships.

The number 1 cause of divorce is money, closely followed by sex. (Culture and education attainment are not far behind).

However, people need to understand that a lot of people (too many contrasting figures to quote a percentage) regret their divorces; some even get remarried to their exes. If you're at an impasse which you believe is insurmountable, understand that your life could become worse, you could not find anyone else, the grass may be greyer on the other side; or (I suspect the most painful one) your partner could find someone pretty much perfect for them.

Kobojunkie:
Add to that, destroying his own relationship by his foolishness.

Kobo, if you're going to send a link, at least read it.

The Men's Journal link is completely irrelevant.

The bottom line is this: you have to be in a sexually compatible relationship for it to work. Compatibility is not one sided. Both members of the Union have to be at an understanding.

Edit: I see there's another link. I'll check it out.

Kobojunkie:
This is especially for you and others who believe in such ideas [url=https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/underneath-the-sheets/202106/the-myth-sexual-incompatibility%3famp]The Myth of Sexual Compatibility [/url]

Common Sexual Compatibility myths, Debunked

I'll check out the video but my statement is based on my life's experiences.

Kobojunkie:
This is especially for you and others who believe in such ideas [url=https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/underneath-the-sheets/202106/the-myth-sexual-incompatibility%3famp]The Myth of Sexual Compatibility [/url]

Common Sexual Compatibility myths, Debunked

Patronising.

People should marry someone they are sexually compatible with in the first place.

Kobojunkie:
A woman married to you is still a human being and not a sex doll or slave. Once you get that into your head, you will be well on your way towards finding a resolution to your marital problem.

If you really don't want to cheat on your wife , then the options available to you are as follows
■ Find a channel through which you can expend the excess energy you carry around with you there self control and discipline aren't lessons only kids ought to learn. Adults benefit a great deal from having such lessons planted in them from childhood, and are still able to learn them. Take up exercise, Sports or a hobby that allows you focus on other things to take your mind off sex.

■ Work on improving the health of your marriage. You and wife can seek out professional marriage counseling to help you both figure out how to help each other in this problem

■ Also consider the aid or a sex therapist as a couple to help you get the best sexually out of each other.

When we tell you people to know your wife/spouse before marriage, una go hala.

SuperStriker:
Good day everyone.
I don't want to cheat on my wife but she cannot cope with my demands for sex. She even told me to control myself and be more spiritual and I am wondering. If I am not controlling myself, I would have cheated on her long ago. I am a fine looking man with many opportunities to cheat. We only have sex when she's ready and wants it, anything outside that is excuse upon excuse. How can a woman I married be telling me to control myself?

If you've been doing Accounting at a church, is the church planning on opening a school?

Accounting is a straight line to management.

This alpha beta gamma yarns is hogwash.

However, you should have advised her from the beginning that you would wait 5 minutes. Then when the 5 minutes was up, you vamooze.

There was absolutely no need to go back to talk to her and complain.

None of my romantic rendezvous were materialised by trying to kiss someone who wasn't trying to kiss me.

Pumpumking:
Ok so yor advise for a guy is to stand like mugu looking like statue & keep steering at her lips & doing nada...correct?...brother, do sleep wit teddy bear sir?(no oofense)

Boogyman557:
Holly Gram tell me, who on Earth will not LICK or SUCK does TOES.. How many Naija GIRLS nails fit be like dis. WTF MAN

Fake story.