₦airaland Forum

bukatyne:
This thread is not about sex please.

The author listed 10 ways to be a dominant husband.

What the author did was tell the husband to change himself so his wife would naturally change herself to conform to the husband if that's her desire.

So your concern should be: how many Nigerian men are dominant (in author's terms) without been abusive or ungentlemanly?

bukatyne:
Ok.

bukatyne:
I found number four funny: if a husband is to be 'sexually' dominant like 'Wear that pink bra and wait for me on the couch' and not expect her to say no, where is consent coming in?

I am not arguing for/against here, just made an observation.

Another observation is that they are very big on faithfulness. Irrespective of the type of marriage prescribed, they teach faithfulness to the husbands.

So let's go:
Men: Do you agree with the traits listed above?

Any additions to the list

Dtruthspeaker:
we are Spirit too, so we see spirits!

Remember that is why we used to see some babes and we say "Bros run, day one na evil spirit"

Dtruthspeaker:
What shall you say when it is married women knocking on your door asking you to Potiphar Wife them now?

That is what is going on now?

Mariangeles:
That is awesome.

Though I could doubted the story without picture or video evidence, but I chose to believe and hold on to that little faith in humanity.

Mariangeles:
Really? You?
'Cause that your comment was just too plain and concurring to be true... and the smile, it made it even worse
With you, it's either disagreement or sarcasm

Mariaangelo:
1 man comments nd it has 2 be u,,, are u d only man in this section?

Mariangeles:
But he said to them, "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe."

BornToSucced:
It’s a crazy world champ........May we not end up dating married women or becoming Assistant Husband las las

Dubemzy:
Christopher Dempsey gave up half of his liver for someone he’d never met. He overheard a coworker he barely knew talking about a cousin who had stage-four liver disease. She needed a liver transplant, but there were 119,000 people on the transplant list before her. Unless she found a donor, she would only have two more months to live.
Dempsey didn’t know the family well, but he didn’t think it was right to let her suffer. And so he butted in to offer to get himself tested to see if he was a match. When he found he was, he agreed to donate part of his liver.
The woman whose life he’d save was named Heather Krueger, and they didn’t meet until after he’d promised to give her his liver. When they did, though, they fell in love. They started dating after the operation, and in 2016, two years after saving her life, Chris Dempsey got married to a woman he would never have met if he hadn’t agreed to give up an organ for a total stranger.

BornToSucced:
I get you bro......Just imagine the mental calculation you have to go through, when this could have been avoided by a mere ring

BornToSucced:
I don’t see it as a bad thing either.

I just wish I could easily identify a married lady (especially the fresh and newly married ones), even without a ring.

Is there a better way?

ObaKlaz:
She has revolted against the Sisterhood.

Why wait till his brother's funeral to open the can of worms?

Mariangeles:
You do know that extreme fatigue and exhaustion kills right? Seriously...
Also, nervous breakdown can lead to so many health complications.
I don't believe that more husbands die earlier than their wives.
The thread is gradually taking a different turn...

Mariangeles:
By detrimental, I meant health-wise.

It is not that contradictory.

In fact, because of the satisfaction we get, we can easily get carried away with work and all. The more we get, the more we want. Aiming for the top, we keep going and never stop. I mean, why stop when you can keep going right? And there's nothing wrong with that, unless your health is at stake.
It takes someone who really cares about your well-being to take note to remind you to stop and take a break to at least breathe.
It is an issue for most women nobody is talking about.

Mariangeles:
Yes, there's a satisfaction that comes with having a successful career and running the home, but what I am trying to make you understand is it is mostly at the detriment of themselves.
The truth is women hardly speak up when they feel too much pressure. Nervous breakdown is real and I believe women are more likely to suffer it.
When people like saaphiere's pastor keep pushing, pressurizing women to prove themselves no matter the circumstances with the whip of her words in the name of motivational speaking , they lose it at the end of the day.
I know her type....they say more than they do.

Mariangeles:
I agree.
No woman should be shamed or compared to another for her seemingly weakness and shortcomings.


Well, I don't agree that a woman should overexert herself to try to prove to whoever that she's a super woman
I believe a woman should give her best as much as she can to her family, and should be appreciated for whatever she's able to give and not to be pressured into doing more than she can.

Like it or not, knights in shining amour still do exist

Mariangeles:
That could only be possible with women who have very supportive husbands.
When I say supportive, not just financially.

Any woman who makes you believe it is easy to have a thriving career and still keep the home running successfully by herself is lying to you and slowly dying on the inside.

vickyfrancis1:
then just pray and hustle to get money so you can build a very big house and you won't have to be bothered about privacy since the rooms are different. you can also eat whatever you like whenever you want. unless you have other reasons.

WoundedLamb:
Wife or not, the OP should help the ex. Given the current situation, helping the family of the ex who isn't even in Nigeria is only pertinent. They aren't together anymore and they are far apart, I see no imminent threat to his current relationship

Ishilove:
A figure of speech of a sexual nature. Fucky fucky.

Ishilove:
And you just had to include a sexual angle. Oniranu.

Saintmary:
My point exactly!

P. S. I couldn't get the things I said to you out of my mind. I apologize.

bukatyne:
At this rate, I give up!

@your other post: Marriage gives legitimacy to a relationship between a man & his woman.

However, if you cannot be responsible and make the right decisions by your partner before marriage, the marriage vows possess no special powers to make one start to make the right decisions after marriage.

That is why people choose monsters and somehow expect them to change because they said their vows after marriage. Or choose partners who had multiple relationships and someone expect fidelity.

The responses on this thread are also hilarious to note especially as it is a rare sight of male & female NLers heading the same direction: whatever name we call the OP, he did right telling his current girlfriend about the Ex's request.

The current girl should have had more sense, dug into the matter and make a right decision else Bobo would stop telling her stuffs and when/if they marry, she would start lamenting her husband keeps secrets from her. If I can't trust you to make the right decisions, why shod I confide in you?

My tboughts: if the OP still feels very strongly about his ex after deep soul searching apart from her sexual prowess, he should end his current relationship (apart from the fact he doesn't love her, she is very selfish, greedy and would alienate him in future) and reach out to his ex.

Lay his conditions on the table, extract her and continue the relationship. If a her concern is to 'help her family' instead of finding an escape for herself, her story of dumping him to hustle for her family is believable.

Some people have a misguided sense of duty towards their families. I know a woman in her late 30s who said she couldn't leave her brothers alone (40s & late 20s) to get a job she was required to stay there for the week in addition to other factors.

When we meet people at certain stages of life, we must accept that others have contributed to the man/woman we deem attractive enough to date/marry and they might have debts to pay.

Ishilove:
Crack are you being deliberately vague?

Ishilove:
I didn't understand half of it.