₦airaland Forum

souldust: i been tink say u wan begin criticize oo.its seems to be the only thing you do on this forum. Pls mellow down on the aggressiveness in your criticism of other people.

I wonder what mind he has. Must be moving around looking very miserable..oh God, deliver us from fanatics

Good move.

I'd so much love to work in such a city . Women would feel more comfortable outside of their homes and would more freely express themselves.


I think allowing that woman go for the olympics is a bad move. She probably was allowed with the thoughts that she'd be less exposed when compared with other sports. but arent sports with the purpose of inflicting harm on you or somebody else UnIslamic?

「「itikaf means seclusion and if u wld only take some time out 2 observe those acts of worship in a mosque,u shld call it somefn else. the least itikaf u can avis a night wv d intention. going and coming like some people do,I dont think is what itikaf is about. waAllahu a'lam

@op I am not observing Itikaf yet. my schedule isnt allowing it but my peeps ar doin it somewhere in Ibadan

May Allah accept everyone's Ibadah. amin

smartmom: @sisi=kill, you are speaking like a real down to earth kinda naija brought up gal. I tell you those are the values we have thrown to the dogs in the quest for westernization that has brought up most of the ills in society. Yes we can and should pick the good out of western values, we should be wise enough to keep our own great values as well. I have friends who have vowed to instill naija values and etiquette in their kids though they live abroad. Now that is what I call having the best of the 2 worlds!

yes. it is okay to instill those values. But please, not the one that involves beating a child to a pulp

following..

what pains me is how Africa's gold medals are now going elsewhere. Ethiopians and Kenyans used to win the long distant races. I wish they still do

I think parents have roles to play as said. Funny enough everyone who shared a story has a loving parent My fear is of people who may think they'r doomed because they fall in the other group--they have the other kind of parents, probably the abusive ones. So, here's what I think.

While having parents who call you beautiful, good hearted and all the good qualities in this world, even when you don't have those qualities has a role to play, I think the most important part to self esteem is YOU.

My mother thinks am the most beautiful young woman in the world and when anyone speaks of something good about anyone around my grandma, she'd say that person is beautiful but my children are much more beautiful . I was very thin while growing up and even though people teased me as too thin, my mama made me realize I was a princess.

But the most Important thing that has shaped my life and made me realise how worthy I am is when I discovered whom I am, what I wanted from life and how I wanted to achieve it. It gave me a sense of purpose and I simply stopped taking less than I deserve from anyone and I think that is self respect.

I dont care too much about what anyone thinks of my looks. Even if I would spend my last bucks on it, it was for me and for me alone and not for anyone's approval. Any disapproval, if in the form of an advice would be well received but any jest is shoven aside. It doesn't get at me.

well, I hope I wrote that humbly

tbaba1234: This is a powerful statement; Our communities face these problems.... I am so glad, He spoke about them, I will like to hear deols comment on this...

Habib Ali passionately talks about the compulsion placed on Muslims in ensuring that the treatment of women within the community is done in a just manner. He outlines the Prophetic tradition on how the measure of goodness is tied to the goodness to women.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZG6ibK8mwo&feature=player_embedded

May Allah guide this ummah... Where are the men of this ummah?

Thank you sooo much for this video @tbaba. I enjoyed seeing the video and it is a good wake up call to Muslims. The home is what makes the society and Muslims just cannot continue to be the way they'v been. I am saddened when I see the way Many Muslim women live in Nigeria. Because I am very outspoken about it, some people term me a feminist but I am not I am just a Muslim woman who thinks Muslim men are going overboard with the 'I am the head of the home' thing

from this video--

*Muslims should not think their Iba'dah end with fasting, reciting the QUr'an, jihad.
*All of the other things we see as important are naught if we wont address injustice to women.
*the issue of injustice to women is one we should not run away from
*when abused women cannot get the injustice from the muslim community, they seek it elsewhere
*if they leave the religion as a result, everyone involved would be questioned on it
*Men justify these wrong actions against women using the QUr'an
*whereas they are getting it wrong
*and maybe the men need to put themselves in thhe shoes of these women
*smh @ situations where the victims(women) become/ are termed the criminals

YES

Wizeboy: why are you so jealous deols

Actually,I asked that question for a reason I have thoroughly discussed on this forum. Muslim men/Imam/alfas prefer to talk about and emphasize the role of a woman in her marriage while almost totally neglecting that of the man. see this link- https://www.nairaland.com/884289/nigerian-muslim-men-women#10316770 .

the effect of that is not far-fetched.

the truth is majority of us are selfish. very much hoping we'll get partners who would be the best in the world without striving to be the best we can be.

olawalebabs: pls don't let us post some sensitive materials online. E mails and phone no. There are ways you can send those contacts.

I agree with you. some people may not be too bothered though. If you arent stepping on toes, you may care less.

fellis: @tunyus,
please who those sitting round the table?

I think I can tell two of the guys and if I get time to look deeper maybe I'l get more. I want to know who the ladies are sha.just their usernames. anyone wants to help with that

the message is obviously for Muslims. may the christians just ignore it?

oh no. they just cant deal with hearing anything good about Islam,d way the majority of Muslims practice it.

They would rather hear of the Islam of the boko haram. that way,christianity may appear good.

I could care less what you christians think of Islam. I am more concerned about my Muslim brethren practising it right.

Hope the last ten days is going on good peeps. dont forget to seek the pleasures of Allah,ask for forgiveness and remember d girl hiding behind 'deols' in prayer.

Nigerianeye.com. finding the story hard to believe

he isnt allowed 2 die but every other person is? o ga o

Wizeboy: From the above Hadiths, we can sum up the characterisitcs of a good wife:

1--She is a good Muslim, obedient to Allah and His Messenger.
2--She performs the five regular prayers and fasts Ramadhan.
3--She is obedient to her husband, unless he orders her to do evil.
4--She protects her husband's money and honor in his absence.
5--She is always nice to her husband, checking on his needs.
6--She always tries to please and calm him if he is angry or upset.
7--She bears his children and does not ask him for divorce for no reason.
8--She tries to always look and smell nice for her spouse.

and the good husband should?

jaylehk: The prophet (saw) said that guys should look up for the following in a lady:BEAUTY,WEALTH,RELIGION and BACKGROUND.....But he placed more emphasis on religion.So,i think that makes more sense

Actually, the prophet did not ask men to look for these things. he said people seek these things and the best is religion.

I however have seen many 'religious' men who are not necessarily good husbands/fathers. Ironically though, the prophet mentions that the best of Muslims(saying, the best of you) are those who are best to their wives and in another narration, who are best to their families.

sino: my sister, no be so o, i just liked their simple way of doing things ni o, unlike the yorubas with so much effizy and razzmatazz.
On a serious note, i believe there is nothing wrong, in fact it should be encouraged, whereby the families of both the bride and groom come together to render support for the couples(not the support of buying cow and drinks for the ceremony), especially if they are already due for nikkah but having difficulty of accomodation and other basic needs.

I agree with you. Parents shouldnt wait until their girls bring bele home or when the boys do the undo before rushing things. Yoruba Muslims(really enlightened ones) are also, nowadays helping their Children start up.

I agree hundred percent wv bnty
one other reason I dont agree wv usn quran verses as ringtones is d need 2 pik up d call thereby cutting off the recitation midway

@Olawalebabs, sino and kokozain are right. The bride provides the furniture for her sitting room and bedroom. Like Busar said, we really should be concerned about the effects of all of these things.

in Islam the groom should make the provisions except on occassions where he is not able to and a tradition that makes it compulsory on the bride should not be encouraged.

waAllahu a'lam

@bros Sino, na wa o..so because of furniture u wan go for hausa bride ehn? If it was for the beauty I for support u o..

kokozain: I think d major fault is frm our parents had it been dey have make nikkah arrangement even before our BALAGA (maturity) all these issue might not even ensue in d first instance.

arranged marriages are not entirely good either and it is not the rule in Islam. So, no need blaming anyone for not engaging in it.Remember also that the consent of the people involved are to be sought before the marriage can be legal .

Apology to d south (am a yoruba bt shcl in d north) dat is y i respect deir arrangement because dat is wat dey do no "karimi"(show off)

what does this mean??.

Even on d day of nikkah dey made it simple has hw d holy prophet did it. So bro & sis pls let re-ajust on hw nikkah ought to be done not infatuation.

You could just have given your advice without this comparison. The Northerners I know and what I have heard of their wedding ceremonies is far from simple. The bride price and all that goes with it is enough to keep a man running away.

Hw many broken homes do we hav nw compare to our parents time. Allahu Allam

Times are really changing. Am not sure though if it is for the worse

^^ are u a shrink? how come u know all that happened?

it is good. I av no problem using it

Havilah93: what i have noticed is that mosques become full during this period..., and the general behaviours of people fasting change, i mean they become friendlier....which is a good thing. I just hope this will continue after the fast...

that is one of the aims of Ramadan...Someone who could shun fornication for a month may realise he could do entirely without, becoming a better Muslim. Such a person is one believed to have attained the full benefit of the glorious month.

@op, every Muslim is expected to be calm during Ramadan..to avoid vain talks and to be deep in worship. SO, to a large extent, Muslims are calm in Ramadan

maclatunji: Maybe those girls shouldn't be eating in public during Ramadan being Muslims. Not everybody researches before jumping to conclusions as we have clearly seen here.

I wonder how easy living would be if u keep looking over your shoulders for people who may not understand what you'r up to.

SO I dont av to repeat myself, I mean, there's nothing wrong with doing the right things even if others wouldnt know/understand them as right

we love Nija no matter what.

If we cannot win any medal, we should at least be able to flex muscle over something...this is it

I was at an event in Ibadan and at some point mobile policemen started harrassing the cameramen, people not seated, etc. I felt very uncomfortable and asked what was going on. ..the governor was on his way! think of moving too close to him and I wonder what would av happened.

OlowoTee: Hmmm...
why are we so QUICK to believing anything we read online? I don't attend Winners Chapel, but then I find it difficult to accept this report...because it's one-sided. No evidence, no excerpt/statements from the AbdulGafar, Bishop's Sister etc. What if this report was falsified to tarnish more the image of the Bishop and arouse unnecessary sentiment just has we have here, already? Let's be quick to hear/read and slow to speak. It helps... #Let's be our brother's keeper, love unconditionally, never quick to judge.

well, tbe AbdulGafar one is very true..It wS very much discussed on this home page not too long ago. That thread, just like this one confirms the intolerant nature of Nigerian Christians

drzed: @King Fahd University list:



Because I KNOW for sure that they are Christians...unlike some people here who post their assumptions as facts. That was why I provided links to (some of) their web pages which contain email address. Send email to anyone of them and ask them yourself to be sure. I even pointed out the one whom I suspect is a Hindu.

For your info, I KNOW most of these Christian people personally....thats right.... King Fahd University alumni in da house.

I would have provided list or links to Christian students of King Fahd University (Nigerians for that matter), but memory dey fail man pikin, there is no time, and also because the Nigerian Christian students I knew long ago dont have web pages/have graduated.

many of these people are too happy the rumors about d midle east are thriving that they fail to verify them. They even claim churches are not in those countries without ever being there and that u cant take a bible to Saudi. and even when d facts are presented they look d other way.

i dont know why many pple are insulting the op. I just dont c d correlation btwn being a good cook and avn a successful marriage. that rule is not set in any kind of stone.

what if a man doesnt like breakfast or prefers to eat out or just doesnt care about who cooks his food.

people only need to understand whom they are and d kind of person who'd be able to deal wv their thought process and lifestyle.

update us as it unfolds pulease