₦airaland Forum

Asking if you should date a girl cheating on her boyfriend is like asking if you should hire an armed robber as your gate man.

iykbethany:
Guys pls what is *depression* and how do you know that you are depressed?

Depression is prolonged sadness. You get depressed when you think there’s no hope of improvement on the situation confronting you.

You know you are depressed when you don’t want to be conscious. Some people just want to sleep, others abuse alcohol or drugs and some want to just die. You would do anything to escape the feeling.

opebiboy:
America and western Europe are capitalist countries. They hate free things and believe you need to work to get what you need. Everyone should fend for themselves. Imagine living 60yrs without creating a retirement plan for yourself then passing it down to your kids

And nobody hates free things lol.

opebiboy:
America and western Europe are capitalist countries. They hate free things and believe you need to work to get what you need. Everyone should fend for themselves. Imagine living 60yrs without creating a retirement plan for yourself then passing it down to your kids

lol In this same Naija? Anything can happen like job loss, or even low income earners who can not afford to save after expenses. There’s nothing wrong giving to the parent, it’s a way of honouring them and showing gratitude for what they did for you.

My parents are doing very good but I send them money monthly and they appreciate it a whole lot.

opebiboy:
A friend told me in Europe and America kids dont support their parents financially and that is one of the reason they are progressing. If you want money go and work for it. Even in developed countries people work into the 70's.

Neither do parents support their kids in Europe and America, kids move out of their parents house at 18 or start paying rent in their parents house, kids borrow from government to go to university too.

I am struggling to see the connection between not taking care of your parents and progressing as a nation

My parents gave me everything when I was young. I don’t have to owe them before I decide to give them the best according to my abilities.

That’s a woman who acknowledges her husbands headship over her.

They may attempt to buy the baby from you and if you refuse they may likely eject your family from the compound, making you financially distressed so you agree to give the baby up for adoption.

The only reason there’s a fixation on the baby and not the other grown up kids is because she wants to have the baby to herself.

Those saying the OP is selfish are just entitled little sissies.

It’s like the OP husband wakes up one morning and tell his brother to give him 20% of the money in his account or ask him to build a bigger house for him because his family has outgrown the BQ and when his brother says no we start calling him selfish.

OP your SIL will soon tell her husband to offer your husband money to adopt your baby. It is a good thing you stopped this early before it escalates to that.

If your SIL’s intention are pure she will soon get over it after grieving. She definitely will understand the bond of a mother to her infant. Doesn’t matter if you have 100 kids, no woman should be separated from her baby unless she chooses to.

Slikosliko57:
You have a point but not entirely. If the individual didn't pose as a threat to himself or others then it's wrong to force him to a psychiatric hospital. But just because two of your sons fought each other does not mean they are now both mad and insane and need to be taken to a rehab. Some people have temper issues naturally and that's why the police are there to solve issues of violence. Rehab or a psychiatric hospital is only meant for people who have become unable to manage themselves, who display symptoms of madness.

Why will someone prefer to get arrested instead of being taken to rehab? When you live with a guardian they determine when you are unable to manage yourself.

When I lived with my folks, sometimes I’m sick but I think I can manage, they are the one who insist on me going to the hospital. It comes with the territory, the people who you live with knows when you need help even before you do.

You are assuming that this family throw their son in rehab to punish them which isn’t the true. I’m sure we will never agree on this issue, maybe till you have a son who’s causes you problem. If a 30 year old still lives with their parents and go to club every Friday that’s a rehabable offense in my opinion.

Slikosliko57:
Unfortunately, this is true. But it is wrong. Anybody above 18 or 21 should be considered an adult by law.

Not really wrong, your parents has the right to choose what is best for you as long as you remain under their care. Is it better to take a child for therapy or evict the child? I know in Canada once you turn 18 your parents can kick you out of their house.

18 is the age to stand alone, so must 18 year old work and pay rent even if they continue living with their parents. Adulthood is responsibility not just age. If the child lives alone, the parents will not go kidnap him from his house and take him to rehab.

Weed smokers I know are always angry and violent, they don’t know and they think they are just fine. The people living with them are the ones who suffer the consequences. I support rehab, if you want to be stupid live alone.

In Nigeria as long as you live with your parents you are subject to their authority. You are not an adult even if you are 62.

mamagee3:
[color=deeppink] What does it mean when a man doesn’t like to use a condom with you but uses a condom with other girls?[/color]

He tells the other girls the same thing. He’s digging all of you raw.

bdchange:
I agreed with your first statement, but using it as a yardstick for today's marriage is flawed. Change is inevitable in all situations. So it is either you change with it or remain lagging behind. So many things has changed since our forefathers and mothers such as educations, socialization, politics, population increase, humanity, and so on. Just like trying to compare U.S of Abraham Lincoln to Trump's or Nigeria in which Lord Lugard almagamated to today's Nigeria. Evolution has taking place and we need to adapt to the new changes with different approach. Marriage inclusive.

Change is not inevitable. Human quest to cause problems is what is inevitable. Something can be absolutely perfect and people think we can make it better. We have seen this with weapon, cosmetic surgeries, junk foods etc.

Just because things are changing does not mean they are changing for the better.

Mstick:
Yes she’s 100 percent right. Women are evolving constantly and bettering themselves meanwhile men prefer to be stuck in the stone ages.

We’ve seen threads on nairaland, heck I just left one now where the posters agree that men can cheat but women cant, in other words women are the only ones that can feel the emotional pains of being cheated on but the ones causing the pains should be pampered.

Marriage is not business a usual because more and more women are getting exposed,educated and financially stable which is pretty much the only thing men really can offer that’s why you see them always talking about which woman ate their money and who didn’t.


Over 70% of divorce are filed by women what does that tell you?!

Evolution of women is also the greatest undoing of women, forget what you see on social media, talk to the divorced women around you. Talk to the women who refused to get married because they wanted to make money first.

What would you want men to evolve into? To start getting pregnant? To start breastfeeding? Perfection needs no evolving. The reason women feel they need to change is strictly out of low self esteem. Women are stepping up to men’s role, men do not have anybody to look up to and simply has no need to evolve.

60% of divorce comes from women because women again, always feel the need to change their situation. When they are single they badly want to get married, once married they badly want to be single again.

From the days of Eve women always wanted change while men always wanted to keep the status quo. God placed different curses on men and women, the women today are partaking in the curse of men while carrying their own solo and that’s what you call empowerment? Evolution?

ouzo1:
see marriage and wedding na two different things.
most of u prepare for weddings not marriage,marriage takes alot to work.
u need to be ready mentally and emotionally but these days na weak ass Men dey everywhere and whining Women.

You can never be prepared enough for marriage. Are you going to prepare for the loss of a child? Loss of income? Are you going to prepare for your wife’s family issues? Prepare for a wayward child? Anything can change the course of a marriage.

The marriages of today has left their original blue print. Marriage built on the wrong foundation can’t stand.

Marriage lasted in the past because women depended on men in the family unit. If you want a long lasting marriage, marry a dependent woman period.

Women like to claim evolvement, but not all evolution are positive. In the past people killed people with spears, today there are chemical weapons that can wipe out a whole country with the push of a button. That’s evolution but is such evolution positive?

You can’t change a working formulae and expect things to work the same. It’s Eves evolution that got us to where we are today. The lust to change what is, to change the status quo is the biggest problem of a woman not a blessing.

Your mum is greedy and it’s difficult to change things like that in adulthood. Whenever people call you to report her begging, tell them not to give her anything.

You can go further to tell your uncles and aunts to tell your mum that you instructed them not to give her anything again. She will stop begging if they stop giving.

Cheating shouldn’t be an option to anybody who has signed up for a monogamy relationship.

I know lot of women who do not mind their husband cheating because the husbands made it clear from the start that he can’t be monogamous.

I don’t think there are humans in this dispensation (dating/married from 2010 to present) who doesn’t cheat or would not cheat if the opportunity arises.

It is because single people aren’t looking to get pregnant. So single people aren’t concerned when they don’t get pregnant.

There are lot of single people having unprotected sex but have never gotten pregnant, we do not hear of them because again they can’t be bothered.

Some girls act like men are some kind of lifeless toys that can be remote controlled.

I don’t know the kind of family your boyfriends come from but if my brothers girlfriend comes to me wanting to Bleep me, I will probably bundle her and take her to a psychiatric hospital before her condition worsen.

Virginkpekus:
Oga stop lamenting, nysc is just one year, go and marry from your village.

The only one lamenting here is you. I am not into Igbo women, I am not dating an Igbo woman, I will not marry an Igbo girl.

If you want people to marry from their villages stop spreading your seeds in their villages. Stay in your caves.

If you don’t have the funds to go abroad, stop thinking about it.

You can register with NOUN and school while you work. You already work with an ICT firm so why not study something ICT related?

It’s never too late to go to school, in 5 years you will be 30, you can either be a 30 year old with a degree or a 30 year old without one either ways 5 years from now will most likely come.

This is like saying why do the Igbo people complain about other tribes yet they won’t sit in their villages? So they prefer these other regions to theirs yet they keep complaining about them.

Whether you like it or not, by virtue of being together in a country people meet people and fall in love with them, it’s not a matter of preference for a tribe.

For example when I served in Owerri I was the only non-Igbo corper. I was surrounded by Igbo women I had to be with Igbo girls not because I prefer Igbo girls but for lack of options.

If you don’t want people from other regions to marry Igbo girls, the only solution is to stop moving to their regions and stop them from coming to yours.

It increases your chances with the visa officer, the officers know you have a place to stay so you won’t be homeless once you get there.

Just apply with complete and correct documents and your chances are higher than people who have nobody there.

Nigerians do not know how to be empathetic. The MUA would have simply taken her inside, talked to her about the requirements of the shoot, told her if something else comes up they will give her a call. That’s how someone with a functional brain would handle such issue.

If she lives in a country like Canada or the US she could cash out big from a law suit.

She's religious and you are not. There is no wrong or right here, you both are incompatible and trying to change yourselves.

Better to leave now, if you end up married, you may not last 2 years in marriage. the bible says "can two work together except they agree?"

Marry a girl who doesn't go to church or doesn't have a personal relationship with her pastor.

1Sharon:
I still don't see what's so bad? Kaftan looks very traditional

I'm 100 percent with you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the wife. The only difference between the wife and side chick is the age. The wife looks like she is in her late 40's to early 50's while the side chick is obviously younger. It is arrant stupidity to expect a 50 year old woman to be dressing like a fresher on campus.

Shey Beyonce sef dey wear oversized kaftan na why Jay-z cheat abi, Juliet Ibrahim dey tie wrapper na why iceberg slim cheat, abi na Toke no dey wear makeup. All this long talks is just from guys who cheat trying to rationalize cheating.

2019 was Atiku’s last chance to contest, no more grandpa in Aso rock after 2023.

If the PDP decide to give it to the North again (which I absolutely doubt, as the southerners in the party wouldn’t allow) it will be between Tambuwal, Saraki or Kwankwaso. The likes of Wike, Fayose, Obi and Umahi will most likely fight for it too.

First time is always special, your second time when you see cocaine, chains and whips hope you will be kind enough to update us.

That’s why if you must cheat, cheat with people that have something to lose. No professional doing well for herself will be exposing her whoring to the world like this.