₦airaland Forum

For a traditional relationship where man provides and woman cooks and cleans it is okay.

For a modern relationship where there are no gender roles anybody can provide any body can cook and clean No its wrong

Elder001:
Doesn't mean whether they will anything to men or not.

My reason for creating this thread is that I've never heard of or seen any Nigerian woman who has a will. Legal will/testament is like a man stuff in Africa because women don't see the need for it

They need it, many women especially single mothers and widows have wills. A will is not a public document but ask lawyers who draft wills they will tell you

So many issues here:

Is the child's father willing to give up custody? What exactly is the court order about? Is it an injunction from the mother or or from the child?

The parents may be economically challenged now but if that changes in the future and they decide to fight for custody is that right for the child's mind?

It looks like you don't have much of a say.


If this is done right and if you were comfortable with adoption there is nothing bad about adopting a child, the birth right you are worried about these days it doesn't matter, kids find their own way, see Davido and Falz their parents built businesses, Falz even studied law to please his dad but made his own success on music and movies. Davido left his dad's businesses to do music. I am saying raise the kids to be achievers on their own with your support and not to be relying on birth right.


My only issue with this arrangement is if it is legal, it doesn't seem so. Your husband is trying to control a situation that may backfire

Women die too and a lot have work and assets they should have wills.

A lot of women have wills but very few mention their husbands or give them any sort of control over their assets same women who will advocate for men to make them sole Beneficiary and executioners

Evangkatsoulis:
Big difference.

Same thing even worse.

Now that Kemi has finally resigned on the certificate matter when will others with Questionable or no certificate also resign?

Obla who has been accused of forging his WAEC certificate?


President Buhari who has not been able to show his WAEC certificate?

The same Presidency defending her just 3 days ago, same person who Sagay defended a week ago. Sahara liars.



The Presidency yesterday officially reacted to the forgery allegation against the Finance Minister, Kemi Adeosun saying the allegation was unproven, as naysayers were bent on nailing her irrespective of investigations.

Adeosun was alleged to have presented forged Exemption Certificate from the National Youth Service Corps, NYSC, as part of her credentials to the Senate.

The NYSC and the Information Minister, Lai Mohammed, had in separate assertions, claimed that investigation into the matter was ongoing.

Presidential spokesman, Garba Shehu, during an interview said the Minister of Information Lai Mohammed has spoken on the matter and a process is ongoing to address the allegations.

He revealed that when that process is completed, Nigerians will know the outcome.

However the Presidency’s assertions were immediately dismissed by the opposition Peoples Democratic Party, PDP, which said the administration had come to its wit’s end and that the Adeosun episode portrayed the administration as fraudulent.

VANGUARD/BEN

Evangkatsoulis:
Someone else's semen was deposited into his wife!

And so? The married men who go about depositing semen in other women nko?

Now I know Sahara liars are hired PR agents for this government.

Same Government who were defending her a few days ago, Just two days ago they released a press statement in her defence claiming that the allegations are false

Just here to see the male hypocrites telling him to divorce, if a woman caught her husband cheating you will be saying she should forgive him that it rains everywhere that all men cheat and divorce is a sin.

Smh

Meringe:
I think differently from what others here have posted. 11 years old girl can back a baby very comfortable and help with with little house chores.
If you are a good person and a positive person at that, you wouldn't be thinking this way but you seems very difficult. See, no matter how bad people are or unappreciative they might be, it can never stop a 'giver' from giving .
Take this girl in and train her like your own child and she will in turn train your child. Unless you have observed that the girl is not a good girl, then you can be justified.

When you have your own daughter send her off at 11 to go and be a Nanny to another person's child since you feel so strongly about an 11 year old child working for somebody instead of enjoying her childhood

Your dad seems controlling, this seems like a way to totally tie you to his control because once you build in his land he gets to have total control of everything you do from now on. I don't agree with it

I think he needs to calm down and start building a relationship with you instead of shouting and then looking for subtle ways to manipulate you.

I would run from such an offer.

Please don't be frustrated with those accusing you of all sorts, a,child of 11 should be with her mother being a child, helping the mom with a business is best.

Those pre teenage and adolescent years are so tough a child should be with the parents grow and decide as an adult if they want to be a help. Your husband can pay fees while the child stays with her mother

ifyalways:
Go to an Orphanage home and foster a child. Plenty of homes on the brink of collapse because of lack of funding ( no money to pay nannies and other staff, school fees etc)

Nigerians love to aid and reward crime and laziness by giving to online scammers while the real needy offline are dying.

It is not that they want to do things illegally but we make the adoption process so tedious and expensive, time consuming too.

I have been in the system and standards are dying. It is really bad and no help anymore for women who want to give up their kids for adoption.

While I do not endorse baby factories I hope we can work towards making it a less tedious process that discourages intending parents from adopting

Thank you Uju, you have said most of it.


Poster, I understand how you feel, your dad was not raised to be functional and most of the answers you seek you may need to be the one to initiate the process



Take time talk to him and let him know your frustration, demand an apology. He may not give it then but he will think about it and as he ages and starts thinking about death he may make amends. I had a bad relationship with a parent I was consistent in telling the parent how I felt it took a while but things are getting better now same parent is my biggest support system through current challenges

Sigh

Passengers are now afraid that herdsmen may g
Start attacking the trains in retaliation for their cows killed and sadly the President may defend them

A Kaduna-Abuja train carrying 600 passengers on Sunday stopped in a bush near Rijana in Kaduna State after crushing over 50 cows.

Sources said the area is notorious for kidnapping and armed robbery.



DAILY NIGERIAN gathered that the train with registration number KA4 stopped for about 40 minutes, causing panic among the passengers.

Sources said the police arrested the herdsmen for allowing the cows to stray onto the track.

On Friday, another train broke down on the outskirts of Jere Local Government Area of Kaduna State, an area notorious for kidnapping and armed robbery.

The incident prompted anger and disappointment from the passengers on board the train, which took off at about 10:35 am on Friday and stopped in Jere at about 12:20pm.

kennydotkom:
Calling you name before your husband when he knows ur kids name is bad. Also calling you ur name or disrespecting u bfor his friend will empower his friend to do same to you and society frown at it. Secondly the boy never do anything in the house when his sister is busy with her 3kids, cook food, sweep, mop tiles the boy will remain inside his room until it's time to go to kitchen to carry his food or go to watch ball on saturday afternoon. His sister is feeling the need to have her female sibling staying wit her than this boy.

The name thing is cultural, some cultures don't really care about that, the main issue is not doing anything around the house and expecting to be served, that isn't decent behavior

kennydotkom:
Abi now. How can he call his sister by her name in the present of her husband and that wont cause trouble evn if he has been doing that before now? when ever woman get married either your elder sister or younger one, she deserve respect from that day she got married, but this boy stil want to live in the past.

€


My sibblings call me by name doesn't matter to me but staying in my house and doing nothing is not acceptable

So why is he afraid of election jailing anyone who declares intention to contest against him

Nobody should make you uncomfortable in your own home if he cannot live and respect people then let him go and have his own house and do ego

Hanseel1:
evidence on what?

Of the negligence she is accusing him of

My people don't seem to understand that condom is family planning method.

Calendar method is only effective for regular periods it failed me

Same people shouting injectables and pills will come and talk down on a woman who puts on weight aa side effects of oral and injectable contraceptives

Please ignore the ignorant people who do not know that condoms are a form of birth control.

Gold circle is good and safe but some do not like it because they say it reduces sensation, you can use rough rider though expensive.


Most form of birth control have some side effects on the woman and condoms are a safe form of birth control, the fact that people use it as protection from STDS doesn't mean it is only for that purpose

Juzzybabe:
I know most people who are not linked to me on social media may be wondering how I am doing. Well, I must admit that God has blessed me beyond my imagination. I am doing extremely well, and my kid as well is growing so fast and performing well in her academics. Her dad isn't responsible to his duties but my job is well paid so I don't even feel the burden. My mum looks after her for me while am at work and I adopted two other kids. So I have three kids

I'm sure I mentioned that he filed for divorce and custody of the child, well I got a lawyer in Nigeria and the case is still ongoing. But it will surely end in praise. Thanks to you all! I will keep u posted

Happy to read this. I hope you have evidence against him so he doesn't get custody of your child

realtalk19:
The child is not the only victim here,she is also going through domestic abuse but afraid to make a choice. It gets to a point one will be so scared to run because you feel there is no where u Wil run to that he wunt find out or threaten you especially ones kids

She is an adult she chooses to stay with an abuser even though she is the one providing and can afford to leave and provide for her kids, she doesn't want to be called a woman without husband, her choice nobody can force her but a child didn't choose this situation hence the child is the only victim here

Hmmmm, there is no legal way to do this. No matter what documents one signs if you decide you want to walk away with your baby there is nothing the adopted parent can do.


If this is true I really understand your current state of mind and before I would refer you to social welfare but social welfare is dead since this Government took over so I know people are mostly on their own in these matters. Sigh

Baby factory scam. I pity any desperate trying to conceive mom who will fall for this

So many people lack the love of a father hence keep dating damaged people trying to fix themselves, if father's loved their kids and showed them affection then we won't have so many low self esteem women and angry boys.

Nothing wrong with the picture, everyday I see things like this I fondly remember my dad. All the strength I have came because he loved me and showed it

NGRBorn:
As I said previously I do not live in Nigeria, which makes the guest's actions more mysterious. There is no logic in the guest keeping or hiding for future use Naira in a country where Naira is not the currency.

You are not listening, it seems your mind is made up. When I travel, I set my local currency aside so I can have some money when I get back, sometimes people can forget it or where it was kept very common and just assume it was lost and not want to bother you by asking especially if they are not sure where they left it, call the person and inform them they left their money and stop with the needless drama

The person probably hid it so he or she can have naira to use when they return and forgot it. I keep my money tucked away so I don't get tempted to spend I forget sometimes