₦airaland Forum

@netcees
Please note the rules

-A verse of 16 bars only
-Any extra verses will be deleted
-Stand by after Round II for directives

@Wordsmith
Good work in Round I
You'll have to go first in Round II
A win for you in this round will mean you just won Warcraft: Know Your Role

@Hannibal
You'll need to come with your illest shit to go on to the next round
As I said before, extra verses will be deleted

@ALL
Without doubt, both netcees have lived up to expectation
Will we see a strikeback from Hannibal? Or will we see a concluded autopsy from Wordsmith
Sit back and enjoy WARCAFT: Know Your Role: Round II

This is what the netcees dropped for the first round

HANNIBAL

Once again it's on. . .
Yo-Yo-Yo, feel this. . . . .

Why the hell i w'anna battle with a sissy and his prattle
Ma lyrics like the venom of a snake that wont hesitate to rattle.
I throw a jockey of his saddle, ya blood's for me to gaggle.
The plan is to subdue your crew and beat your spouse properly
I got a fetish for afro-titties, i ma nibble on her nipple.
Me against u is like Bruce Lee versus Spike Lee.
With ma desert eagle, i feel blue spitting ebonics and language so blue
So contagious it spreads flu which leaves your ass glued on a mat like a dying Hindu.
And while your brain`s aching, I'ma have your dame slavin`
Crack 'caine, and plain white apron over a flame bakin
Wordsmith, u have clashed with cyanide gas
Be prepared to die fast!!

WORDSMITH


THE FUNERAL

For this wack, i'ma break it down like enzymes/*
'cause i assumed you presumed your doom like the end-time/
this homo screaming ain't no mountain too high like Brokeback/*
you get thrown back when i blow gats off this show jack/
. . . leave your dome critical when i flow criminal/
wit that tek heat//have this head split, and the death goes clinical/
now i keeps that Mac clean just like that toothpaste/
u lose face when i grab that tool out that tool case/
f this quack, i'm on that duckhunt, u's on a wild goose chase/
'cause you to me's an idiot running a fool's race/
your talkin' is cheap? gimme the glock n em clips and the guttin is deep/
read that Kama Sutra and you still can't Bleep with the 'Smith/
3 years running and i been bumping the site/
like a miscarriage, 9 months and u still can't deliver somethin' with life/
your future's empty, ain't none can get this fool past me/*
'cause only time u flow is when you bleed a tsunami off your p*unani/

VOTES FOR ROUND ONE

HANNIBAL - Hybrid-X,
WORDSMITH - Chiogo, Tianshe, Malthuss

Wordsmith is therefore declared winner for Round 1

Hannibal:
Now the next item on the menu is Dr. Kitaun's Jehovah Jireh jingles.

SHARRAP DIA!!!

80th minute, Liverpool has refused to score

End of Match: 2:0
UCL here we come
Hope we don't get tough teams in our group

Cristalz:
What manner of embarrassment is this na? Bringing Bendtner on when the game's already good and wrapped up? What's the point playing for what, 4 mins?

Van Persie is injury-prone
He can pick up an injury in the 94th minte

Walcott + ADE=GOAL!!

And his reward is Randall coming to take his place

@Hannibal
Did you hear Setanta's commentary crew taking a shot at McLaren
The dude was telling us that they're losing an important match, even though there's no umbrella in sight

debosky:
So Alonso is out, one less player to get speculation.

Yeah . . . Alonso's out, now at least the press will leave us
What a waste he'll be if/when Barry comes

I think it's time for Vela to come in, Walcott's into the match now

Funny enough, the guy that should have cleared the ball went off with Walcott
C'mon, an indirect freekick, and he was following Walcott??

VP-Ade did sumnsumn now
Seems like we'll score today

@debosky
I saw hightlights of the Liverpool match, Alonso's playing
That rules out one potential buy

Now our only hope is Inler

@Hannibal
Seriously, I'm not sure if Walcott started the match
I saw him touch the ball only once . . . it scares me

Keane has been showing of his 20mil fee . . . so far, no goals

I'm still trying to understand how Djourou, Eboue, Sagna and Clichy can play in one match
Our attacking instinct has been impotent so far

Oh shit . . . one on one
Almnia saved us

@Podeep
Don't mind Jackal jare
Denilson-Ramsey midfield, they're doing their job well

VanP's been our main player
Ade's been non-existent

DeepZone:
You wonder why we have more gay men in Nigeria now over lesbians? Some men especially the poor ones had to resort to another man's behind just to exhale and release stress. Hannibal knows what am talking about but he's fronting here because somehow, somebody gave him a job as the image maker for men. i suggest women should be allowed to carry guns in Naija now.

If I say you're daft, Hannibal will tell me I'm wrong
How dare you say sumn as stupid as that??

Have you gone to UNILAG before?
All the years I lived in Nigeria, I never saw two men kissing
I've seen ladies tonging in Galleria, 11:45, Mighty(at Igbinedion), on my street
I've heard of 'em in Secondary Schools too, and here you are openly displaying your stupidity

DeepZone:
Another ridiculous claim from a ludicrous He goat.

I stayed in Lagos for two weeks last year
I saw three 'Leave my boyfriend' alone fights

No one even came to interfere, they passed without flinching

DeepZone:
Show me a link, even in the tabloids. LIAR!!!!!

Where I came from, they call pple like you OPONU
I said sumn is normal, why would it be in the tabloids??

It's just like reporting in the news that boys now play football on Saturdays

[quote author=$$Rhino link=topic=159805.msg2652389#msg2652389 date=1218651721]cld this be as a result not enough men to go around?[/quote]Hmmn . . . you said it yourself
The XX thing in Naija is causing a lot of problems now

Hannibal:
Honestly, the lass needs help.
Posting garbage everywhere on a forum to GET OFF.
What do we call this now. . . . .Post-gasm??

Yeah . . . to her nland is her personal P-SPOT

DeepZone:
Here comes the hammer. can you prove that women use juju on men? Of course it's an urban legend but I can prove these murders and we are talking murder here. Why not start an organization that will provide free shrink for our men so that even though many of them are LONELY, they can exhale through adequate communication and fellowship. The non profit organization can provide the services of free strippers too on tuesdays and sundays.

I've told you, there's a reason this one made the papers
At least it was still the same Punch that had a story on thousands of women begging for husbands

Infact two women fighting on the streets for men is now a normal occurence in Lagos

DeepZone:
Yesterday it was a man killed his girlfriend and commited suicide and today it's a man killed another man over a girl, Very soon, Hannibal, Eldee and co will come here to claim that women are surplus in Nigeria with respect to men. It's not women killing each other over menooo, na men dey kill each other over us.

Mugu . . . you don't know it's strange
Why do you think it made the news, out of all the killings in Naija
The stories of women going to spiritualists over men don't even make the final cut
Why? It happens too often

@Hannibal
Abeg leave the trany alone
She's busy clutching to The Punch papers for false hope
It seems like her Ilesha houseboy has stopped giving her regular shags

Le Constitution
1. 16 Bars
2. 2 Rounds (A third round if it's concluded a draw)
3. All out dissing, no holds barred
4. No judge.

a). A total of 5 votes.
b). 3 - 2 votes is a win.
c). 3 straight votes is a K.O
d). 5 straight votes T.K.O

5.  NO BITING
6. No irrelevant talk

RESTRICTED VOTING: Shaz, HybirdX, Tianshe, Mailmalc, Alexpissu, Maverik, Menike, Malthuss, Chiogo, Rapsody are the only voters allowed
                                   Votes from other netcees will be counted as mere opinions

And I'll give both emcees a chance to do a 10bar callout

                       ********************************KNOW YOUR ROLE********************************

No callouts, no angst, just the best of today VS one of the pioneers of Nairaland freestyle battling.
This is definitely not the walkover we witnessed in Spit or Quit, this promises the best thing Nairaland netcees have ever seen.
Best of 2006 (Jackal) VS Best of '08 (Wordmith)

Famous lines from Wordsmith inculde:

kiss a verse like Jada, that gun locks [lox] with a clip on u/
hot 16's be the shit, my Styles P[ee]

on the Battle with Bolajibaok

lyrically i remain flawless, your remains more or less on the floorbed/
with an epistle that reads "here lies Malthuss whom the Wordsmith murketh"/

Apparently murking Malthuss

From Jackal
Its Jackal, the street- talker, heat sparker
the beef starter, packin guns while i eat prawn-crackers

They call me Jackal Tha Assassin because i thrive on dissin'
Dishin venomous lyrics to foxes that SIN and hood-vixens

Place your bets already, this is def sleeker than your average

Hannibal:
Many of em are thunkless. . . . . .
It took me 3 years to explain the old offside rule. . . .Now with the new rule with interference, i am thinking 2019 before she grabs it.

That's hard?? try explaining transfers
Try explaining to them that La Galaxy bought Becks from Real Madrid, and not from England
That he still has a right to play for England

Hannibal:
Too much for 'em because Football season clashes with em moronic shows like Cheaters and especially all those senseless movies on Nollywood TV.

Sometimes I have to go on wikipedia to prove that Bendtner does NOT look like Ross from friends
And that we didn't sign Fabreagas because of his looks
Please tell me any resemblance between Ferdinand and Kevin Federline??

Hannibal:
Farewell what?? Not on a bloody grandslam sunday.
If i could refuse to pick up a girl at the train station @ 4pm on sunday. . . . . Heaven knows i won't be attending any event at such Godly hours.
They forget football never leaves us when they throw their own weekly temper tantrums.

My Boss told me the best way to get em interested is buying em a football shirt. . . .
I tried it and it didn't work out. . . . .Women?? Smother em before u take a rattlesnake's life.

Buy a football shirt? Nah . . . chics think wearing a shirt twice is a threat to national security
After the forced smiles and one day of acting as if they care about the off-side rule, c'est fini

Now no one's telling them to jump wiv us when Adebayor scores his 30th goal, just go watch Friends or sumn else, and stop calling.
Is that too much to ask?

Hannibal:
They are twisted attention seekers. . . . . .They don't want any other thing to be between u and her.
A woman once accused me of cheating on her with MAN UNITED.
I laughed for hours. . . . . .I mean, i have heard many asinine statements in me life. . . .That had to be the 1st.
They simply forget the hours they spend watching back to back series of "Friends" or "Lost".
Buncha self-loathing twits.

Just imagine one chic telling me to come to her friend's farewell dinner on Grandslam Sunday??
With all the newspaper coverage and TV ads Sky Sports rolled out, she din't still understand how important it was to World Peace

Women will never be satisfied till the day we look into the bathroom mirror and scream 'Idiot, she is your master, serve her wiv your last breath'

CodeRED: See your face, conquests from where?    , I visited the AIDS ward today and I saw many "Conquistadors". Soalang, have "fun". Just know the black dresses in my wardrobes are far too sexy to wear to funerals

AIDS?? Nah . . . STDs are passed on by choice
Conquests are won by tact, determination and passion.

Infact I've always wanted to stop phishing, but nah . . . eLDee wasn't born a quitter

@topic
Adventure, Fun, Conquests, Stories to tell my grandkids

debosky: eldee I think you need to write a book mate

I think I need to draft it as a contract
Sumn all men have an chics have to sign after three dates

onyinye: More rubbish in my ears. Load of garbage.

You're not being forced to sign, are you?
It's not like you ever go out with guys that know any footballer apart from Beckham

Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be

To expantiate on that

The Champions' League Final is like our anniversary; it reminds me of how many Champions' Leagues we've seen together

Never ask for the front page when I bring the newspaper, it's attached to the back page(transfer rumours page), use your brains

NEVER EVER arrange any dates for Saturday afternoons, it's a crime

I will not be responsible for anything I say or any action I take when Arsenal's a goal down

Everton VS Blackburn is as important as MTV Movie Awards, I have the right to watch the second half

The jersey for last season is different, why the hell do you think it's £20 cheaper

@KarmaMod
More like . . . out-of-this-world, next level . . .

@Hannibal
How?? Go to New York and get a credit card from there?

Sly said sumn bout buying Itunes gift cards from US stores, then using 'em to by in US dols
UK Itunes hates us, they'll only get an album after constant pleading
Now when I hear a new show's coming next year, I'll have to start writing reviews now

Doyin thinks it's Wizard of Oz

@Hannibal
What of the all important question, 'Does I-tunes UK have it?'
HMV has any and every series on DVD, we need to beg I-tunes to give us anything

Or do we have to go there and write reviews like that of the Nas album?

@KarmaMod
That's just what I use when I run out of adjectives jare

I'm on Episode 9, where he found out his dad left him sum property, he's moving to the new house at the moment

@Karmamod
You know how you don't want it to finish on time, because it's just season one and two?
That's why I'm not watching more than two episodes a day

Dexter's the best thing since Saw

@Hannibal
Did you buy 'em back?? Next time listen to me when I say HMV beats I-tunes
Is Oz aight? I know The Wire's tight

DVD comes wiv special features and deleted scenes
It's nice to watch jare

[flash=425,355]http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docid=8749401442170075570&hl=en&fs=true[/flash]
That's the video
Listen to how he explained it

@Hannibal
Polying? nah . . . I'm a child of God
I just get bored easily and this is DVD not I-tunes
I'm not scared it'll mysteriously disappear