Belafonte:


But each woman has the choice of not dealing with man who wats more than one woman. I mean men divorce cheating women everyday, no?

pocohantas:


What exactly are you talking about? Is Pete Edochie rich?? No be yesterday Kanayo build house? Tony Umez is still living in a rented property till date. Didn’t some other old actors die of sicknesses?

There was no money in acting (and entertainment) of the old! They were at best comfortable like an average family.

Fame isn’t equal to wealth!

Now you guys are twisting in all angles to refute the grass to grace story. Do you know his father more than him? Same Yul that celebrated Pete on father’s day saying he didn’t have more than 5 pair of trousers while they were growing up. Abeg rest!!

JONNYSPUTE:
...... Hehehehe.

JONNYSPUTE:
.... You don't know what you are saying bro.
Yul's father Pete was a civil servant and a presenter in radio Nigeria.

When he featured in things fall apart then,he acted so well that when he retired he joined nollywood so he wasn't rich.

It took him,Pete more than 10 yrs to complete his personal house in Enugu so tell me how such a person will be tagged rich then?

Yul him self after writing his waec then in 1998 from New heaven boys secondary school got admission,graduated and while waiting to serve got his girlfriend pregnant.

It was the dad that stood for him and was taking care of him and the wife .

And it was at that time that Pete introduced him and the other of his son into acting and luck smiled on Yul.

Believe him when he says he had nothing.
This na guy weh I know too well. Grew up together in the same vicinity,move around and belong to the same group chat of our old boys though he left the forum now.
So you won't tell me about the family.

Emarvel:

I will skip your rhetorical questions and respond to the bolded, when you say or write that a woman suffered with a man, is it that the woman was far better than the man but she chose to marry the man or both of them were just managing? If both of them were managing, then stop using the term stick by or suffer with because its not applicable, life is just a race and we all came to be part of it, nobody invested his/her life into another, let's stop playing the blame game.
If he was maltreating her or she cried out because of domestic violence, then i will be a critic of Yul, but right now he has done nothing wrong by marrying a 2nd wife, unless he stop caring for the first wife.

Emarvel:

He has repeatedly praise her till date, but there's no where he promised her monogamy.
He married a 2nd wife doesn't mean he now detest her, he just want to continue to live peacefully.

Acidosis:


Is this message for me or the OP?

Acidosis:



Good. We can condemn Yul's actions without trying to make ladies who are "really suffering" with their decent husbands look like f00ls for upholding their vows. Odabo.

Acidosis:



I'll really like you to bookmark this thread 'cos the same Yul will come back again in two decades to hype the second wife about how she stuck with him in 2022 when he had "nothing".

I hope my aim is clear now? Please bookmark the page and save us the stress of having to type the same thing repeatedly.

Acidosis:


I am not in the category of people who said all actresses earn more than their male counterparts. For God sake Pete Edochie used to be (and maybe still is) the highest paid Nollywood actor for over a decade. What's the idea behind the cancel culture and gross generalisation? Female actresses appear richer because we all know that many of them have multiple streams of income and the industry somewhat favour them.

For how long do I have to come to this thread to explain my point?

People must not say what you want to hear, where you want to. And this thread is not about the correctness of Yul's actions.

Nobody deserves to be cheated on. That's my view about life. Trying to demystify cheating behaviours based on who is less or more deserving of cheating husbands do not make sense to me. This is the narration I'm trying to correct but some are hell bent on pushing the narrative of "don't suffer with him".

Even if you want to classify the type of ladies that do not deserve to be cheated on (since this is what the thread appears to be), I don't think Yul's wife has done anything beyond what other victims have done and still doing.

Acidosis:
Funny how people still believe some "grass-2-grace" celebrity stories online.

If Yul, a son to a famous Nigerian actor, could be broke during his undergraduate years, so what then should we and many other Nigerian students say?

Yul definitely wasn't where he wanted to be at the time he got married. That's not the definition of being broke.

If Yul's dream of becoming Nigeria's president gets actualized tomorrow, he will come out again with stories about how his second wife agreed to marry him when he had "nothing."

Yul was never broke and Yul's 1st wife did not marry into a broke family.

DoggoneDogg:
A sensible woman ought to be hiding her face if she is just getting married at the old age of 46.

All these fake smiles will disappear soon when there is no child to be presented to this same family. And even if a baby comes out of this union, this woman will be holding a 3 year old's hand to Kindergarten at 50 years old.

And knowing celebrity marriages, if they do break up in less than 5 years, a woman in her fifties will be coming on social media to constitute a nuisance about her "side of the story"... something she should have grown past in her 20s and early 30s....


Let me just stop here before I puke.

janejjjjj5000:
No. I grew up in Winners Chapel and Papa and Mama always say they have never argued in their marriage. Even last year, Papa still said that he and mama have not had their first argument almost 40 years later. That is the kind of marriage I always wanted but now, I feel bad because I cannot boast of the same thing. Shouting at your wife is abuse. And worse is that our children see it. I have read that it can affect children psychologically. I feel that I have failed.

michael1508:
Ojukwu blood never dies

Mariangeles:


In this case, it is the mother that is giving the whole family sleepless nights na.

O,p for now, just give her some space.

folake4u:


Yes oh. I fit deck person teeth sef.

folake4u:



Lmao, not in this life or the next to come sef. I nor fit try am, Sis.

folake4u:
I nor fit marry if I nor get my OWN MONEY oh.

Me wey like enjoyment, cruise, food and soft life.

lefemmechoclat:
You know one thing i live by is what isngood for the goose is good for the gander. Im sure if i was a woman that did this the advice would be different. For this man to literally lie to my face while it's ongoing is something that I s unforgiveable. Its like judas to jesus except b i am human. If he can do that to me knowing all i have donenin this home and for him. He can do anything to fulfill a desirenhe wants damned how i feel. Hard work i have sacrificied for. What i see on this board is similar to in haiti. If a man builds on his famiky land a woman cant inherit or sell it and get the money in case anything happens. That is money gone to his family. Later hisbextended family could take over. Its a sunken cost. We owe over 50k to the IRS. They could literally take our home in the usa if we dkntbpay that off soon and it accrues interest. I helped him get a car and helped him pay it with my credit. It is in nigeria right now being enjoyed. Ye declined to sell it to relieve some household debt. All the work I have done over the years all my money has went into our home. His to others pockets first building another home first. Everyone knew except me that's embarrassing. I would be working 2 jobs and still he couldn't cook the kids food cos that's a woman's job. I am not Tolerating anything. I am doing damage control at this point. He priorities his famiky before me and my kids future. That's painful. I could have remained single and now I have 4 kids to raise. He could in 25nyears say he is going back to Nigeria since all of a sudden he loves his country. If he was this foretelling I would have never married him. But he got what he wanted. I rather cut my losses now.im still young. I don't have time to be worried my husband will eventually go back and to do what It hurts to know that I could've not worked and helped him at all but that was used against me.

I told my parents this morning they were suprised and angry especially my father. That he didn't like I have been working 1 to up to 3 jobs at a time and had to be financial issue and why would he be building a house with me having to work so hard. My husband told me he won't be told he can't take care of his parents. So...
quote author=ifiokjohn post=111406359] I know it's hard for trust to be rebuild but if both of you work towards it...it's can work.
Have seen a woman forgive her husband who cheated on her and broke her trust. But in the long run, she chooses to work on her marriage, forgive her husband and today they're very happy. That trust has been rebuilt.

Your husband has a fault. He cheated on you by not telling you he was building a house. You're his partner in everything and he cheated by lying. Buts it's been two years( I guess he has apologize) now is the time to let it all go. Build a happy home again. You can if you both work on it.
Ask him if he's willing to help in building that home. Let him promise openness this time around..taking you in all his plans weather present or future. .and that you will put as much work on it as he will. NOTHING MORE NOTHING LESS. let him know you doing this for your children and for the Love you had/have for him and cause you believe children grow better in a stable home.

Let him know you want to be in all major decision making.. from the money he is sending home to his parents or cousins...if you want him to stop sending money to his cousins except on dire situation then you can agree for him to send.

Marriage is all about understanding, communication, Tolerance and Trust.
I put tolerance there cause your partner will push you to your limit but your ability to Tolerate, smile and push forward helps keeps your marriage. It's both ways by the way.

Then Trust, yes marriage can not exist without trust but even trust can be built after it has been shattered. Though it will take awhile but you both are willing to work on it and from now on be straightforward with each other you can save this marriage and build a better future for yourself(Unity)

Advice him on business plans like the Real Estate and how you guys can setup in the USA.
It's possible. Make him understand it.
You guys can build a more secured future for your family.
I believe in you Guys.
I believe in marriage
I believe in tolerance
I believe in Trust
I believe in understanding
I believe in communication
A marriage can work with all this even without much love.. but where there's love and not all this...it's a recipe for disaster.

My fellow African sister, build your marriage again, your trust, your tolerance, your communication and your understanding again for the sake of your kids and the love you once had/have for him.


HAPPY SUNDAY TO YOU. MAY THE PEACE AND LOVE OF GOD THROUGH CHRIST STRENGTHEN YOU. ENJOY YOUR DAY AND SAY ME HI TO YOUR KIDS.

I'LL LOVE TO TELL YOU CONGRATULATIONS IF YOU DO MAKE IT WORK.

bukatyne:


There is another breed of husbands that works, earns more than the wife and still not contribute (financial, domestic etc) in the home.

The things I have heard and seen.....

A husband splitting mortgage 50% with his wife when he earns way higher & only husband's name is on document.

Abi wife struggling with fees while husband is buying designer shoes and wristwatches.

That's why when I hear split bill 50 - 50, I am wary.

When people shout that all women should work so that their husbands would not ridicule/disrespect them, I laugh.

In addition to looking for you don't want, one needs to look for what she/ he wants.

skywalker240:
Didn't married her,

Her shakara no be here

But I can bet, i saw the look of sadness and jealousy in her face when she saw my wedding pics on Facebook

She always ask after my wife, when she calls and she be "like is she taking good care of you" ?