₦airaland Forum

Kobojunkie:
I didn't start it. I simply can't stand when folks try to use the Bible God in justifying foolishness!

MufasaLion:
I don't like humans that are too weak emotionally especially males. When you are weak emotionally, you tend to make some irrational judgement. People like that see it as being selfless, but I see it as being foolish. I can't trust people like that because they would be the weak link in my circle.

Moreover, I don't really know how to forgive.

Klass99:
And why not? Why can't you have someone like that in your circle?

Talk is really cheap on these streets sha , some comments had my eyes popping out of their sockets.

Hathor how did your thread become a religious debate? I have been seeing Bible verses all over the place, I didn't even bother to read. How we bring religion into every discussion is beyond me....I need that emoji of face palm smacking the head.

Reptyle:
Yes I can. Once again, it is not the gravity of the offence but the mindset towards offence.

One good head can keep a marriage.

Reptyle:
Yes I can...but it is not easy. Takes some work to be able to do that.

Like I said, once you understand that the person you are marrying is not 100%, it becomes a bit easier to let go and forgive when they offend you.

bepositive11:
I personally believe that genuine love is unconditional. And when we love someone, we want to nurture them to become better versions of themselves. We want to watch them grow and thrive. But there's a catch. Some people want to grow but some people want to remain the same

This is why I believe that marriage involves unconditional love and conditional commitment. One of the conditions for commitment being that they are willing to grow into better versions of themselves

Love can also be either healthy or toxic. Healthy love is the one that supports growth and toxic love is the one that hinders personal growth. You can see toxic love in abusive relationships

So, when talking about love, it's also important to distinguish between the healthy one and the toxic one too.

MufasaLion:
These leaders are so heartless, clueless and self centered. I don't even see most of them as learned even though they might have attended tertiary institutions.

It seems we just hate STEM in this part of the planet.

MufasaLion:
Near future? When other countries are planning on colonizing Mars.

theForth:
I once believed in unconditional love, but I soon realized my folly.

I read a thread some while ago, I can't really remember the title but the whole theme was centered on a man who lost his job for a few months and had to walk on "egg shells" in his own home in order not to upset his wife who has been footing the bill for a few months.

The whole thread was comical, in fact the husband was grateful to his wife for being more tolerant, and although she had outbursts here and there but it wasn't "something he couldn't swallow" according to him. The thread was really eye opening as most comments from men and women alike insinuated that the op married an understanding wife with a little outburst about his loss of job.

People get frustrated when their needs aren't met and is anyone morally upright to judge them?

The only problem I have is people deciding what needs are good or evil, a woman frustrated by her husbands loss of job is good but a man frustrated about his wife's inability to bear kids is evil.

Double0h7:
You were watching "You" on Netflix

BRATISLAVA:
Generally, from responses, we can say people tend not to love unconditionally. There's always something in it for everyone, and even if one does or doesn't (love unconditionally), their spouse may or may not.

It's hard to tell the intent of peoples hearts. I think the best we can do is be transparent on our parts and enjoy what we have.

Exjoker:
Why would someone want to do his best to please another person if he doesn't have a feeling of love for that person Until you understand what love really is then you will keep looking down on it like it just feeling in our heart.
Having people's interests in our heart is love itself...

And we are not expecting anything in return then it is love unconditionally...

BRATISLAVA:
This question has no answer!



Ideally, yes. Reality? Yes and no.

bukatyne:
Christianity, Islam, Buddism, Ifa worshippers etc. already have a set of principles expected from their followers.

Using Christianity as an example, adultery is a sin (sex outside marriage) so ideally, a Christian husband or wife shouldn't commit adultery. Same with lying, stealing, abuse of all forms, jealousy, laziness etc etc etc.

Therefore, if you are marrying someone of a particular sect, there are already expectations which I assume you call conditions.

@unconditional love: I don't think there can be unconditional love else we would 'fall in love' with anyone. I am more of strategically selecting your mate and giving them your all thereafter.

Xano:
My advice: love is the most important about marriage.
Without live, there is no stable companionship.

Unconditional love among the couples is most important.

bezimo:
What does Jesus say about adultery in marriage? Go and find out first before asking me stupid question?

Spectaclesawe25:
Know this and know peace.
Otherwise heartbreak is sure in marriage.
For men, you can't get loyalty and honour from your wife if you don't secure her financially, securing her financially is only a function of her own expectation and need at any time T, as a woman you can't get to feel secure if you don't trust and believe in your man, and also help him to win in his little battles. These qualities from both parties aren't even at 50% in most homes. Forget love. True commitment, trust and believe is what grows a home, love comes after.

Reptyle:
Showing up the best you can is an ingredient of unconditional love. It's basically saying to you that marriage isn't always going to be peaches and roses. There will be thorns as well. So make plans for those sort of times too.

bukatyne:
According to the counselor, what is the difference between unconditional love and showing up the best you can?

reddingtonblack:
marriage entails , both parties identifying and playing their roles to the best of their capacity. in marriage you must understand you must alway creat room for the other party.
when it come family i.e we must do what will cover majority interest, do what favours you as long as it does not jeopardize other member interest.

bukatyne:
If both parties love each other 'unconditionally', wouldn't they naturally work to bring out their best for the other party?

bezimo:
The word of God is the standard not some nonsense series or episode ..husband love your wife as Christ love the church.
Which is an unconditional and sacrificial love

reddingtonblack:
If you don't believe unconditional love exist then you might as well believe every partner in marriage are perfect, FIY imperfection begat unconditional love.
even tho the rate of divorce is rising like dollar, those still in marriage are definitely tolerating one another, that is an exhibition of unconditional.
you marry a naija slim gurl after two years in marriage she turns to baby whale, blame childbirth n most men just tolerate it that is unconditional.

Kobojunkie:
Really? Na you go be the person wey she go turn around to blame for ending her 'dream' love affair with a man who is the love of her life?

Kobojunkie:
The idea or expectation of being at your best 24/7 spells "S-T-R-E-S-S". That shouldn't a part of what it means to be in a marriage and a family.

MummyD2020:
Correct! I am married but the way people carry this thing like a trophy amazes me. Life doesn't end there. There are single ladies that are more happier than the married ones. There are many challenges and responsibilities in this institution that you wonder why u even delved into it. I guess its for personal aggrandizement and societal pressures

nurain150:
Oh so you need a man, I thought you don't want to get married.

Kobojunkie:
I agree.... Humans are generally incapable of unconditional love.

Marriage is indeed a contract, an agreement between couples...not necessarily to show up the best they can since that depends on the terms and conditions agreed upon by the couple in the marriage.

nurain150:
I see you coming here again in the next few years to complain.

Almighty willing.

I would remind you then.

nurain150:
Lol. I hope you don't get married and also no kids till you grow old.

If you don't wish for that, don't be an hypocrite .

kkins25:

with the army of prayer warriors going for night vigils in search of husbands? if Doctors advised her to remain single, then i guess its probably because her eggs are loosing viability and fast. Unfortunate, that some get lost in the career pursuit. Capitalism is yhe wombs devil.