₦airaland Forum

Max24:
So after the mother had invested herself ,morally and financially, one small girl comes over to take the shine and glory over the man ? In most cases the mother invests in the boy but the wife comes to enjoy.

This small girl will also give birth and invest in her own son and another small girl will come and marry him too.

That's why "they" always say we should not let the children take the place of our husband...focusing so muchon the kids and neglecting the relationship with spouse.

The children will eventually grow up and go and live their own lives and you will fall back on your husband and continue your love. The one that is more attached to her children will keep interfering in their lives and going there everytime

khiaa:
How much is 600k in U.S dollars?

About 1,700

It must be in ikorodu, iyana ipaja, iyana iba, meran, ajangbadi, idimu, etc for it to be that cheap

People are mistaking wife for girlfriend. It is not the same.

Once you get married, your wife becomes your mother. She takes care of you as a full grown man and takes all your bullshiit.

She has more rights over you than your mum. When my MIL visits, she takes permission from me to enter my kitchen especially. Because she knows it is more of my house than hers even if it is her son's house.

Men that still always run to their mums and put her first before their wives usually have problems in their marriage.

Love your mother and take care of her but she doesn't come before your wife.

CanineOfJackal:
A neighbor died when coming back from work within that 2hr difference from a stray bullet during a robbery

I am sorry to hear that.

But what about the people that died on their way back home on time...they were not late

Ruhamah23:
Why did u ask us to see source for more, When in actual fact there is no more

I noticed it is always a trick when they say you should see link for more pictures, etc. There is usually nothing more. Just play on words..

Flamezzz:
I still have it

Who am i talking to and who is answering?

ElsonMorali:
Lol.

But the issue is if he comes late I don't see how that's going to get the woman to leave that house.


The best thing I suppose is for the wife's mom to call her daughter to order. That's the only person that may be able to talk sense to her.

Very good point

JONNYSPUTE:
......And you think its enough to send the signal? What is there in calling his wife and her elder sister together,in their presence make his feelings known to both? I can understand, he has not yet grown to marry so I won't blame him.Let him keep mute and be dying in silence.

2hrs late is enough to raise an eyebrow if talking to his wife is yielding no result.

A wise man will not directly call his inlaw and ask her to leave except she has offended greatly or done something abominable to jeopardize their marriage.

He is meant to impress upon his wife to make her leave or involve their other family members

JONNYSPUTE:
. What is the difference between 7 pm and 8 or 9pm? Well he should grow up,be the man and take charge of his family. Bye.

2hrs

Dudeweedlmao:
Are you messing with me

I already removed it

Flamezzz:
Black and White? Really?

Yep.

JONNYSPUTE:
. So instead of him to man up and confront the issue at hand by politely asking his wife's elder sister to leave,he should start risking his life by coming back late abi? And if anything happens to him nko? Nawa for some men sha.

So if he usually gets home by 7pm and he gets home 8 or 9pm, that is risking his life abi. People that get home by 10pm everyday, has anything happened to them? Even by 6pm, people's lives are at risk.

How does he tell her to leave? He should just call her and say "please i will appreciate if you leave my house". His wife is in the best position to tell her to go. He needs to press the wife to do it

Dudeweedlmao:
BBN isn't a fair competition and they spend 83 days in isolation (although with the good food) It's still a tedious task from the little i saw.
N.B



Post it.

Done

alimaa:
I don't know anyone to report to, her stay has increased my daily expenses.

Please talk to your wife. Ask her when her sister is leaving. Tell her that as a new couple, both of you do not need external parties staying with you.

If the sister still stays after that, then you might need to take extreme measures like going home late or not coming home sometimes as someone suggested. I am not saying you should cheat on her.

And eat before you get home. If she complains, tell her thst you are giving her space to focus on her sister. If she is smart, she will assume you are spending your time with someone else and she will do the needful.

Is there any of their family member that is reasonable and you can talk to? Please explain to that person.

It is wrong for her to come and stay and refuse to go.

And if you have money for an extra mouth, bring one of your family members that she is not fond of to come and stay.

Dudeweedlmao:
See, you just proved my point. You waltzed out of 50k even though you knew you could have won easy. Life doesn't get any easier than that.



Name two?

I figured some people needed the money more. Besides how am i sure i would have won. I was just saying.

About naming two...from the top of my head, i would say...only guys have won Big brother Naija...all three seasons.

N.B

Now that the competition is over i might just flash my picture...

greatnaija01:
lol awesome piece I must say but it seems you are already a victim

NOW LET ME EDUCATE YOU ON NIGERIAN WOMEN

1) Very desperate for GREENER pastures

2) define greener pastures as a Man with LOADS of MONEY or WHITE MAN

3) Will cook, clean, wash and do all chores even as a Girlfriend just to win the Jackpot engagement Ring

4) Put up all necessary appearances just to be BLAMELESS and appear perfect till MARRIAGE

5) After Marriage her real character shows, when KIDS her born then she becomes the BOSS

6) will not DIVORCE you but can KILL you with African VOODOO and take your wealth

7)ready to use AFRICAN VOODOO LOVE CHARM to get you to LOVE them HELPLESSLY without finding a Fault(you seem to already be a Victim)

will NEVER AGREE to relocate to Nigeria to Live permanently with you here.

9) Can BEAT you or arrange for you to be ruffed up by tugs

10) will NEVER TELL YOU THE FULL TRUTH ABOUT HER BODY COUNT AND PAST SEXCAPADES WITH GUYS.

11) Will never let you near other ladies she sees as threats to her place in your life either because they know BITTER TRUTHS that u will never know or they are the REAL ONES you should have married.

12) She already has ENEMIES who use VOODOO charms and other Spiritual means against her and you just joined her in the battle so be prayerful

13) She will always have a secret african dude that satisfies her sexually in rough ways you can not begin to imagine.

TOO EARLY TO CELEBRATE BRO, TOO EARLY.

People who talk too much are known to exaggerate and lie.
Try to put yourself in check.

@OP a Nigerian woman is more family oriented that the average white woman. She takes pleasure in building a home, cooking for her husband and making sure the home is run well.

However, it is still based on the type of person she is...her character, values, upbringing,etc.

Study her for yourself and do not allow this bitter and hateful person feed you with his nonsense.

Dudeweedlmao:
Yeah. Why do you girls have it so easy? Some gurl is going to win 50k for clicking "snap" on her phone.

That's great for her. She definitely has a need that she can use it for. Guys also get opportunities. I don't think it is only girls.

Maybe if my picture was on my profile, i would have won

Dudeweedlmao:
Why do ladies sell themselves? Just look at this thread, so many women uploading their pix for money. Are you ladies nothing more than tools?

Cc imaima1

What's up? I saw the post and i cannot fault the ladies who contested.

Is there a reason you quoted me?

Waiting to see the winner

LordKO:
@OP

You ought to understand that money doesn't define a sane person - literally. This by extension means that by virtue of one being the sole provider (either be omission or commission), you shouldn't demand or expect servility from another - a better half in this regard. Complement of efforts in marriage or any other form of union neither necessarily need to be in monetary/material form nor in proportional and equal measures before it'll be assumed balanced and healthy. What's certain and necessary is that there must be complement of efforts. There are some people (especially men) who simply need a keeper as a wife, while some need both a keeper and a helper - a keeper in this context I used it doesn't need to earn her own money before she'll be counted and loved, she simply need to be virtuous - a virtuous woman is a conscientious woman, a principled woman, a wife material.

Being a major provider (both material and immaterial) with civility will always earn you dominance and respect not domineeringness and without expecting subservience from your better half. Leaders and loyal people don't subjugate instead they liberate. They don't demand for respect instead they earn it and when they do it flows in effortlessly.

Subservience shouldn't be mistaken for respect. In truth, behind any servile person is a hypocrisy personified. And only small-minded people/oppressors keep servile people or expects subservience from their better halves or others around them - leaders don't do that. This explained the reason why in their time of difficulties they hardly have any of their once sycophants around to give them lifting hand.

You can only buy obligation not loyalty. You can always count on a better half that respect you to remain loyal to you in all conditions. But the one that is subservient to you simply owe you an obligation and will leave, if not kill you, the very moment you lose the object you used in subjugating him/her.

Meanwhile, as much as I agree that small-mindedness is more prevalent among Africans/Blacks, yet that doesn't mean that all Whites/Westerners are aristocratic. Race and gender doesn't define a person's character - ethical leanings will always define a person's character.

That about wraps it up.

Respect is not demanded for but earned. I agree.

With this subservience, there is no evidence of genuine love in the equation. I do not believe that a couple who love each other will subject the other to humiliation and relegate them because they are unable to contribute financially at a particular period.

Westerners are not the demi gods as people make them out to be.

You did a good job with your writeup.

millomaniac:
Saturday was my birthday as well. Wow

Wow!!! That is really a crazy coincidence.

SoapQueen:
My dear. A friend of a friend gave birth via CS, the mother-in-law insisted that she would massage the girl's CS wounds (4 days) after surgery but the girl refused and told her that it was against the doctor's orders.

Mother-in-law said she would lock the girl outside, since the house belongs to her son.

Daughter-in-law says "Mama, you can't lock me outside because I paid the rent".

Mama said okay, she packed all her things including pepper soup spices and told her son to accompany her back to Delta State. The son did.

@Op, your girlfriend is insensitive. Very bad way to talk.

It is good the son went with him. He is not ready to be a man. When he is tired of Delta, he will come back.

How can the mother inlaw want to tamper with CS stitches? And because of that she said the girl will sleep outside. Even if she didn't pay the rent, she has more rights in the house than her MIL.

If only wives and mothers inlaw stop seeing themselves as competitors. Wives should be more receptive and mother less manipulative.

You can imagine my neighbour reporting to me that her her mum in law called her husband to send money. The guy complained that he was broke and his wife had just asked for money for food and he didnt have.

His mum said if he doesn't send money same day, if she dies, he shouldn't come to bury her. The guy had to run helter skelter to borrow and send meanwhile pregnant wife and children had not eaten.

Which one is "her lemon sized breast" again? The person that wrote this has a twisted mind.

lefulefu:
i recall i saw ur pix one time. When i was about to comment on it u took it down. In the pic i think u were resting ur jaw on ur palm and ur mouth was half open. Simple beauty. Biko make una contest.. Me and don piiko will hala d other fine girls.

I put it up on Saturday. It was my birthday

lefulefu:
aghh thank God u called her.. I almost forget. Dat dimpled chick so much look like oshiomole's wife. Her dimples will turn op's head upside down.

So you have been admiring her secretly. See how you described the dimples. Lefulefu!!!

Elder001:
countless threads.. really? I've created only 10threads on nairaland and I don't think of creating any other thread till June 20...I spend only 3 or 4hours everyday on nairaland so I think what you just said doesn't relate to me.


oh really?.. who wouldn't comprehend what you meant by that post? even a kid in grade 5 can surely comprehend that post.

My point... forget about all those mentality, home upbringing stuffs no woman will be the sole provider and won't her husband as a subservient. [western women may be exempt]

No man[some are exempt.. Westerners mainly] will be the sole provider and will allow the woman to make crucial decisions for the family when he's around.. His opinions will always come first. ..sometimes the woman's opinions won't even be considered.

I don't know how you people on romance section think marriage works.

Many of you aren't even married and some are still teenagers.. don't worry get married soon and see if those factors you listed will play out.


Off to work.

So you mean my husband and I are both working and we both make the decisions. And my husband loses his job and tries to make a decision in the home and i go like "sorry you cant do that. I am the one bringing in the money". Or I lose my job and i try to make a decision and he goes like "you cannot make any decisions since you don't bring money in anymore".

It is a flawed approach. Like they are in a competition with each other. If that is how you run your marriage, we don't roll like that (and we are not "westerners".

Marriage is not as hard and strict as you described it to be, hence my first comment.

And you need to open your mind to other views and not always get upset when you are opposed.

nazablossom:
Some people don't use their senses again all in the name of religion. My colleague at work yesterday was telling me that he has been strong (that's religious way of saying you are sick) I didn't tell him sorry or asked how he is doing, I'm not trying to be insensitive here but how can you sympathize with someone that is STRONG. Just call a spade a spade, it won't kill you.

You should have asked if he was weak before now.

Elder001:
Your post was not in anyway related to my topic.

Any it'll be better I pass than to rub shoulders with kids who are always on nairaland 24/7.

Says the guy who lives and breathes on Nairaland creating countless threads

If i decide to sleep here, allow Seun complain first before you take it up. Or are you the Nairaland police??

And i think you are the kid here. Because a mature mind would have the wisdom to decipher my comment and how it relates to your write up. You should change that "Elder" moniker.

Elder001:
what exactly is your point?

If you couldn't deduce that from my comment, then pass.