₦airaland Forum

she might be a nudist or an exhibitionist and these are 2 facts u could easily have found out before marrying her.u can cure here by opening the windows wider and ensure that when she even wants some cover u still ensure the windows are opened enough for people to see her even in the bedroom or loo.the only danger is your wife may eventually get raped by one of your neighbors.


u really have a decision to make.but please do not be suprised if she is happily remarried to one of your neighbours or close friends because her type is exactly what some guys badly want.

a gentle reminder will do in case she forgets.i warn u not to push your sister into regretful action.most likely she hasnt ,it may be she has one or two constraints.a staff once approached me rudely over a late salary and i simply ask her to resign and come back for her salary later.

SirJeffry:
Every Nigerian is corrupt and loves luxury, the seemed incorruptible ones only haven't got the opportunity.

i am not corrupt and i do not love luxuries.it is only fair that im accessed to a luxurious live given the seeds ive sown into life and im a Nigerian Jesus died so i can have life and life more abundant.

Fourwinds:
dat woman must be very stu..pid...can u imagine saying whatever she does is none of ur business...for me ooo. I will chase dat woman out of my house..I don't care if d marriage is a month or not....if she thinks irrationally I will result to irrational decision...if she is not ur wife., who cares if she.naked herslf in public.. once again very stu..pid woman.....ashawo

u ar right on point.telling u that is none of your business is the key word.

Godsonkemz:
Am not a marriage counselor but from my own understanding, you have to understand why she changed lately. Take her out, treat her nicely and if possible take her to shopping and try to win her happiness back and afterwards sit her down and have an intimate discussion with her, reorient her mindset towards you. She'll open up to you why she's doing what she's doing lately but if she refuses, continue to treat her nicely. Even if she's cheating on you, don't be too quick to take actions. But if it comes to worst, relocate with her from that environment to somewhere else where there's no transparent doors and windows.

relocate to where there are wooden doors and windows

if u dont have a child yet with her,consider the option of divorce ,i smell real trouble ahead.

This is why judges should mind their conduct & whom they relate with and to what extent.thank GOD justice abang was saved ,how can metuh begins to brings their personal discussions as friends into an official situation?.was it the judge that asked efcc to arrest him.metuh will pay dearly for this.

as long as your own hands are clean ,i will join in prayers for the quickest recovery ever/just keep praying and trusting GOD that u will not labour in vain and u will not sow for another to reap.the angels of GOD will hem them in on all sides with flaming swords till they are compelled to return your car.i so decree in the mighty name of Jesus.

nice pics,u remind me of my former home.i once lived at uniabuja staff quarters.giri.are these lands in giri or gwagwalada.are they fronting the staff quaters at giri or the main campus.i also a gated and fenced plot to sell for only 3m me on 08097516051

no

i pity the woman and women generally.woman should please get the man's definition of cheating very well and finds it most acceptable before marrying a guy.any guy who will not accept u are first a human before becoming his wife needs be excused.

humans in this era are not like those in the pre i/t era,now the wife neeed not take a bus to where the comforter is meaning she will link the comforter online and there are bound to be needs for comfort in this real stressful climej which the spouse cannot provide or which the wife rightly thinks from an assessment of the husband that the hubby cannot provide.insisting you will be all things to your wife is where men start the journey to failure and heart attack and untimely death.

the wife ,with whom u were actively involved in many cheating games in different forms before marriage at the expense of some other persons like her boss,her bf oversea etc is now expected to transform into zero- cheating personality over nite.

why cant men begin to accept "cheating" if they cant accept cheating.why cant you allow it hidden away from you if ur wife or spouse is really making great efforts to keep it away from U.

GOD being good,with a good heart,the cheating that will hurt you will miraculously be brought to your knowledge and even then you must act wisely and not engage in confrontations because all confrontations has a way of ending in manners unintended.you should notice a core area your spouse is not having anything near enough and reasonably u should know if she cant manage ,she will still be angling for more finaces the way she used to do and if the sex is bad ,u should expect humans makes up bad deals even unconsciously.what u must do to the today's wife is do things out of a good conscience and having done your best and after having seen u do ur best ,then leave her with her phone.As a matter of fact as u suspect she may actually be reporting u to the guy whom she thinks she ought to have married and she might actually been reporting your lousy bed manners.

most wives has a best friend ,a male ,completely unknown to the hubby and that is exactly what most husbands cant handle.not every man she met and didnt marry are less than u,my dear bro,quite a number of them are more than u,and the saddest fact is they are the ones ur wife really want for a hubby but some of them happens not to want her for a wife.please cherish living long enough to enjoy your labour,let her keep her fone to herself is that is her wish. i know how reading your spouses messages can ruin your nite,your sleep,your peace,your career and the marriage itself and can affects your driving .accept the burdens of an era .someone is actually chatting ur wife up.

seangy4konji:
My guy.
I will be sincere with you.it annoys me when a woman passwords her phone cos I am the inquisitive type and I v this lady who usually glues her eyes to her phone.if I request to see her chats? She frowns and would nearly pick a fight. She told me she is not cheTing. I ignored that issue for months and a particular day while lieing on my chest?i pretended to be sleeping and she inserted her password. I made sure she stand well while watching football and slept off when we got home.

She was not cheating but the things I saw made me mad. All the exes I had warned her about were still chatting with her,parties and she would tell me am home,majority of the things I hated were the things she was doing behind but no sex. Dat one still calling her sweety and some sex chats.

I printed it all out and pasted it on the wLl for her to see when she woke.gave a good warning and it stopped. All those saying she might not be doing wrong

No man,she is doing something very wrong and does not want you to see it. Shine your eyes.

Ps.if u v funds,get a street boy follow her for a week and let him report to you. If she gets somewhere call like a loving husband my dear where are you while the boy reports the location,if fucking,she will enter a short yome hotel one day and you will know the truth or guest house.

jesus christ,u ar saying u will hire a boy to be monitoring ur spouse's movement.i now know the girls desperate for any kind of husband will still get the wrong husbands.imagine this.hiring a boy detective.

Aviero:
Buy a decryptor diskette, and plug it into the phone memory via the USB port. You would see "decrypt mode" enable? Tap yes. Then gently insert the phone into an electric kettle and wait for it to discharge electronic currents in and out of the cyclonic membrance. After that, insert the pattern that's on your own phone, and wait for 5 minutes.

Whatever she does with her phone and whatever messages she's receiving will reflect on your own phone.

Thanks!

You're welcome.

thank u.i will put 100k phone inside electric kettle cus i want to catch a wife who because she is married cannot enjoy any privacy again.im not saying the wife is not cheating but isn't a spouse entitled in any way to some form of privacy?

hedonistic:
"Go for a woman in your class" means what? A so-called high class woman that cannot spend her own money to get whatever she thinks her "class" deserves is nothing but a useless prostitute.

I hate it when cheap who.res attribute class to their overpriced body or fake affection. Dem full Abuja here and Island for Lagos. No I only Bleep for not less than N100k a night, I use an IPhone 6, I drive an xyz car (that one smelly Alhaji bought for you after inserting his toes into your moist regions) so I have "Class". Duh.

If you have class, spend your own money on the material things you want. It has nothing to do with the man you choose to be involved with (or that chooses to be involved with you) romantically or sexually.

why are u so angry.have u been made to pay 100k for one bleep.how can a woman not feel high class if she get 100o dollars for a bleep.i still dey laugh.

darlenese:
My hubby is my gossip partner , he is my best friend , I don't even have friends, cos there's no need!
I can imagine what this Op is going through , soooo frustrating , !

Women are meant to be loved, cherished and pampered ,And not the other way round , even when we know we are loved , we want to be reminded all the time !

Op bone him back , no time for rubbish, after all you didn't force him to marry you ,
Make sure u snub him during weekends too and dress sexy like u are happy without him, since he wants to be left alone .
I'm glad u are working , spoil ur self silly with little earnings,

Very soon he'll become insecured and start clinging to u

and u say u are married?.tif for tat wife,ur eyes will soon clear.u beta get jesus into your boat now that ur marriage still has plenty wine so he renew the spent wine with a beta wine.

kenonze:
But Usoro persisted, arguing that he is coming into the matter for the first time and the lead counsel is not available.

He asked the court to adjourn to enable the lead counsel come in or to enable him take proper instructions to proceed with the case.

Justice Umar said the witness should be allowed to give his evidence, then he can leave cross-examine or wait for the lead counsel to be present.

i just pray usoro did not say all these,how can a lawyer says he has not taken proper instruction before entering appearance in court.are there any body saddled with monotoring the conduct of lawyers at all ?/A SAN cannot be heard saying he does not have proper instructions before appearing in court and he cannot say he cannot continue a matter because of the absence of a lead lawyer.does a SAN needs to be led by any body.

let those who have ears hear,not every man get time to sue u to court.so in your interest ,dont even let the rumour go out that u are fucking someone's wife.im sure many will still not stop.

Chijosky:
Honestly this fuel matter is getting out of hand,as early as 6:00am I went to NNPC I stayed there till 3:00pm they closed, I went to FORTE OIL, immediatly its 5:00pm they closed, now I now went back to marketers to buy #1900

U Jus let me know how lucky i am,took style enter one queue in front of high court ikeja and after 2hours in the queue closer to the con oil station,a policeman approached me and offer to guide me into the station .ATt first i was reluctant to risk my 2hour plus position on the queue and again the chances of being opposed at the entrance gate and unable to regain the lost queue position made me reluctant but further prodding by the police saw me taking the risk which turned out to be a good risk and i bought wit ease.funny enough the policeman was no where to be seen as i left the fuel station.maybe he is an angel.

As long as buhari do not realise he has the wrong persons in the right places,things will continue to go wrong.I am not disappointed with buhari,I never for once trust his competence beyond catching of thieves.There is a glaring knowledge gap,skill gap in governance in Nigeria ,the nnpc head is the very wrong person..The 3 weeks long persistent fuel crises means Nigeria has no strategic reserve of refined fuel to fall back on should all external supplies failed and yet Nigeria has a ministry for national planning and a national adviser on security.I suspect after eight straight years in government, the likes of fasholas in buhari' cabinet are weary and burnt out.Maybe fashola et all should be on vacation now .This is not the change Nigerians voted .if I am buhari I will apologize to Nigerians and sacked the minister in charge of petroleum/nnpc.

palsenator:
If by chance you are reading this,please do carefully read my suggestion. Some of the responses I read above were from boys who are not yet there and don't even know what it means to be married. Now back to you. You said you noticed he was always boning with his family which was an indication that you guys courted, that was an indication to you but I guess you were too carried away with the affection you saw. My dear, your husband has succeeded in playing out his script and he has openly confessed to you that he did that just to win you.Now he is back to his real self and you are surprised. I keep telling young ladies around me to open their senses while courting and if possible take time to analyse your partner instead of analysing his pocket. Well my advice is that you should sit him down. Express your inner self to him.Tell him to sustain the charm he used to win your heart and as a matter of fact,do that when you guys are intimate because that appears to be his weakest moment.Strike him hard with tears in your hear probably while he was busy thrusting you.Don't respond to his touches, let him make love to a log of wood and I bet he will ask you why you are cold then Strike.I pray for you my dear and I hope your prayers are answered as well.Wish you luck in your marriage but be ready to see surprises that will sometimes throw you off balance.

na wa o,dis one na striker,i still dey laugh.

Atlantian:
Guy, I can bet with my left ball that you are not married. You talk so much about love as if love is totally sexual. Hell No, sex is just an attribute of love. Read about it. Within the context of the OP's marriage. The crisis is not about love, they make love. The crisis is threatening their love. The crisis is of financial nature and some men do not know how to tell a woman a word like "I am broke, I dont have" and they tend to keep it to themselves. It practically shows in their character. They still Bleep, and he smiles a lot when he wants that. And withdraws back when the feeling of financial crisis creeps back into his mind. The man is loving husband. And it is a passing phase.

Marriage is NOT a bed of roses. It is an institution to raise babies and build the contents of their character and expose them to experience life on earth.

do u know u are very right .i remember i couldnt tell any nigerian gf im broke and i dont have and it was only a white south african gf that i could freely say that to and was really amused she sent me the only 3k transferable via internet banking.I REALLY THINK GUYS SHOULD LOOSEN UP.SAY WHATS REALLY HAPPENING ,THE WORLD WONT END.

WiseBully:
I have sent you one already. Check your email inbox and send me a reply.

Thx the nairaland linked email was opened and used for nairaland only and has since remains forgotten and unknown & unusd so i dont even know where to locate the email..

Acidosis:
When we tell people to marry for LOVE only, they say NO! compatibility/stability is all that matters.

All these wahalas are due to the fact that you married a man whose interest is based on stability, not love.

People, marry for LOVE! Mid-life crisis, giving space, and all these nonsense only happens when your marriage is not based on LOVE.

Serious lovers who are extremely addicted and lost in love do not pass through such phases, they enjoy marriage always. They do not read books and comments on how to treat a stubborn husband.

Withdrawing into your shell may complicate things if love is absent. We only care about those we love. Marrying for stability is EVIL, you can't get stability in a home where LOVE is absent, all you will get is LONELINESS & Bitterness (and may be violence when you marry a very stubborn, lousy and hardened man as a husband).

i can spend hours to show u love will never be enough to sustain a very hapi marriage.no matter how strong the love is at any point in time,if it is not constantly nourished by what u say or do or do noy say or do not do,it will finally fade away.this couple may have married for love but somethings we will never know or be told has happened,maybe even on wedding day or nite that has altered the love calculation.a guy once said cus for years no isssue,his wife told him what is d point in having the next sex and he said from dat day he hated her and of cos they are now happily divorced cos the wife threathened the catholic bishop all her adultery will be on his head if he doesnt allow her to divorce.LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH.B DILIGENT IN COMMUNICATION.SHINE YOUR EYES.WHAT U SEE IS WHAT U GET,THIS LADY SAW THE BONING.SOME ARE SEEING THE WEAK ERECTION NOW BUT ARE STILL GOING AHEAD WIT D MARRIAGE.

WiseBully:
Get ready for midnight baby cries Sleep go clear from your eyes by force As for my name, I like to do it anonymous here. But you could send me a pm and we are good to go from there.

how do i get to send pm and im sure too ready for triplets in triples now,they have a whole wing to enloy themselves and their nannies.

WiseBully:
Your husband succumbed to family pressure by getting married. Age doesn't always tell readiness for this lifetime walk. Marrying a guy that's around 40 or past it is a game of chance because most of them get that far not because they cannot feed another set of mouths but for selfishness and unwillingness to share space, time, decisions and of course material things with others.

They are very reluctant to give up some "exclusive" rights like privacy which has become an obsession to them. Sadly your husband falls in this category. He is stingy! He is selfish! He is self-centered! You may have to adopt his bad babyish behaviour in order to reset your marriage with him.

Warning to all:
Be very concerned about how your prospective partner treats his/her family, and this should considerably influence your final decision on whether to marry him/her.

LOL.I think its my freedom and my sound sleep is really what i dont want to give up.no one shares material things more than me.nice above average counsel .whats your name,lets talk more.

Tekevwe:
@ Elvina

Yes he's spiritual. That's one quality that attracted me to him.

U may have to admit u married a man u dint know too well.boning is not of the gifts of the holy spirit and boning personalities cannot be described as spiritually positive cus there is link between boning and sadness.

i once rented an apartment cus d man was a pastor and i thought that was a positive till down the line,one of his daughters had to resolve my sad encounter with him by telling me their dad is an uptight personality and cannot freely express joy.that was the day i looked up the meaning of uptight.

marriage will continue to disappoint folks who thinks it holds the key to all their sorrows,it doesn't.nothing demands hard work like marriage.nothing.what u cant face right now is that u get work,real work to do wit ur kind of hubby.

madam.u and your husbnd didnt have the right coumselling and u are lucky to now place yourself in a position that you can now be taught.

1.marriage is not a feeling,it is a commitment.a feeling like an orgasm lasts few minutes at most so u cant base a marriage on a feeling.
2.quite often many times couples sincerely do not feel in love but the common destination and the common goal which i doubt both of u has established ,is the reason why couples stay glued together.
3 FOR U TO STAY IN A MAARIAGE,there must be a sense of "if im not joined to him,i cant be what im divinely programmed to be"
4.did u do personality assesment,men like me,get busy with arriving at the goal after sex,so if u expect me to watch over u every seconds and tell u i love u ,u marry the wrong man and i alos feels d lady should be busy after sex,i dont dote others and i hate being doted upon.
5.accept the contemporal definition of marriage ,marriage now is not what it used to be in era gone by.
6.u and him are.not communicating,both of u should draw 3 circles one will be for u ad one will be for him and the 3rd circle will contain the space ,physical and spiritual space both of u must share and contribute into and surrender some things into.
7.after drawing the 3 circles,dont ever encroach on the circle exclusively meant for each other.u may not both decide,dont check my fones,dont carry my fones,dont read my emails and so be it.
8.learn the art of seperation before the legal and spiritual seperation,create an environment for ur spouse to be himself or herself as if they are still single.let her or him feel free to do whatever they used to do untill they get to a point that they now accepts such a thing now belongs to the past and voluntarily surrender them.dont insist your spouse stop a habot by fiat,the same reason why u didnt insist before marriage is the same way u dont insist after marriage.like u said this man bones ,boning its his habit.to insist he stops boning by fire ,by force will leads to undesirable results.
9.are u upgrading his life ,are the burdens getting evidently shared or does he wrongly and rightly feels things jus got worse after marrying u.

10.can u forget about urself for a while ,can u elect to be waitress for him,who only answers when called and who compulsorily answes only when called e.g a bar attendant.learnt to give and give and give and give without expecting any thing in return and u will seee how much u have received at the end of the day.forget urself.if he is not talking to u,pray for him ,continue serving him as if all is well.
11.assume he doesnt love u and show him in spite of that ,u are committed to his wellbeing.waiting to be loved until we love is the destruction of today's marriages.why dont u jus play ur own role,the role of a loving wife.
12.spouses cant be doctors,bankers and all the solutions to your aches so u still need the doctor to heal your pains and U STILL NEED GOD.NO MAN HAS ALL U NEED TO BE WHOLE.NO MAN ,NO WOMAN,UR SPOUSE IS NOT A MASSEUR,A DR,A JESUS,A HEALER,A PSYCHOLOGIST ROLLED INTO ONE,HE IS ONE MAN OR WOMAN

Cutehector:
Madam gv ur husband space.. forget the being lonely part. U want him healed ryt? Den let him be..

If u are lonely, dis ls the moment u engage in other activities.. wen he has calmed down, he'l just get bak to u.

how can she be lonely again after marriage?.BUT she married cus she doesnt want to be alone and she doesnt like being alone.

adult films are not necessarily Indecency.some are meant to update your fucking skills which are more and more in constant need of updating in view of the info tech revolution.u need to assure ur spouse he or she is not being left out of the current style.watching films together does more good to a xtian marriage than evil.

u are being ordinary.your husband is kind enough to have u see him bone to his siblings. he is kind enof to let u know a phase and an era has already passed and the era of boning has started with you .humans change and will continue evolving. there are two options we have when those we are involved it begins to evolve into something different from what we bargained for.

1.you may elect to prayerfully accept the reality and adjust knowing the evolution still continues and he may still evolve into a better human.
2.if you cannot find the grace to wait out the evolution ,you can as well begins to be true to yourself and not feel under any compulsion to do or say whatever u will rather not say or do,not caring how he takes it.

if he lets u be with your choice of attitude and if u also let him be with his choice of attitude ,both of u may eventually come to a middle ground and go on to have a happy marriage.


be urself and let him be whatever he wants to be.accept both of u are 2 different human beings trying to blend.to my mind you are forcing the blending,you are not allowing a natural blend.

i think your hubby is a real person and not good at pretence.yes he may not love u right now or then ,yes it may be true like many men that he marries u out of sense of duty but love is never enough to sustain a marriage,the way u reacts to him right now may leads to him loving U real good.

bloomstar:
every freedom fighter experience such....
never give up bro. Biafra is better off this wack country!

obviously the guy was carried away by the glamour side of the whole game,totally unmindful of the high price.he beta get used to living in confinement at least while buhari is there.

u are a kid being helped on by kids.what if your in law is like a person likes me who is the master of my home and will not even allow you to enter my house.the best u can do is to advise your sister to come home with u and stay wit u so u can continue the husbandship.obviously u dont know ur sister belongs to another family now and the contract is sperable only by death,u talk as if u are stronger than the guy and u have the assurance u will beat him in a deal.it is such an assurance that has led many inlaws to the untimely grave.like ATMC RIGHTLY SAID IT IS NOT YOUR BUSINESS,U CAN ONLY ADVISE YOUR SISTER TO SEPERATE FROM HIM IF HE PRESISTS IN BEATING HER.and who says your sister doesnt know he knows how to beat before marrying him.go amd meet him and flog him,suegbe.

Keneking:
I never take femi aribisala pastor serious

the likes of us who dont even know him before now,nowtakes him very serious,now loves and admire him for being too right on point and for rubbishing the whole set up probably sponsored by the government.AND i was a member of that faculty and that university at all level.femi aribisala was right.buhari is simply wasting everybody's time.can he ever moved against tinubu,atiku,obasanjo,ibb? can he?