₦airaland Forum

keishablack:
Wrong timing. I don't think she intended for dt to happen. The person who took the pix shudda deleted it asap

Obviously she did not; and that's why people need to dress reasonably well. It's never okay to dress anyhow just because that's what makes you comfortable.

lilmax:
The man's eyes are closed

That's the scary part right?

Akposy:
Breakfast

This combo na waya oo

Tinynita:
I've actually read every now...guess it's bcoz we gals c wat u guys don't c

you want to kill the OP finally baa?


@crackhaus et al. - you guys should free the OP naa, na by force to divorce ni

KanwuliaJara:
What if the marriage don drown tey tey come begin dey "float" like my own?

oromitope26:
Coldgate, lamdec, dahaz, oluwanoni, andergirl and others thanks a lot for your inputs, am very grateful.

Madam kimoni.
You stated my fears, he loves his mum and they are quiet close. I feel this may affect the relationship between us because he is a very responsible person and will not be happy that his mum will do such thing.

He handles issues maturely but this is kind of different from other issues. Maybe I should just keep quiet for now hoping it won't happen again or continue to tell her no since we are not even married. Thanks ma'am.

Then just keep telling her no and give her only when you can afford it but bear in mind you will also have some explaining to do when he eventually finds out (that will definitely happen). But it's a lesser evil IMO if he can't handle the situation now. The future will sort itself.

All the best dear.

oromitope26:
Good morning,

I've been in this relationship and all has been exceptionally beautiful but for my mother-in-law to be. She has this habit of asking me to borrow her money even though she knows am not working yet and then tell me not to tell her son that its a deal between me and her.

This issue is bothering me and I don't know how to stop it. She is a civil servant just like my parents and the two families kind of know each other but not close.

Sometimes 2013 she called my mum to borrow her a certain amount, when my mum told me I immediately told her not to 'cos its a very bad and shameless attitude. Mum felt doing it will be a good thing, after all said she didn't return the money up till date and never called to talk about it. I really felt bad because my mum kept on telling me everyday that she is shameless. I wanted to tell my fiance but I know he will feel so bad.

Last year she called me again that I need to borrow her a certain amount and her son should not know but I told her I don't have. This morning again she called me that she needs to travel urgently and needs money, she said she can't tell her son because he sent money not quiet long and I should not tell him, I just told her immediately that I don't have cos am not working and she said no problem

I don't know if I should call my fiancee attention to this, it is a very bad habit and to me it should not be heard of self, but I know he will feel so bad and confront her. What should I do? She is so nice except for this money ish

Please advice, sorry for the long post.

Cc: Tearoses, kimoni, Bukatyne, Zaynie greatgod2012, Thorpido. Please advice a sister.

Hmnnnn, this is a difficult one oo

How well do you think your fiancé will handle this issue without it escalating or coming back to haunt you? Some men would find a matured way to handle it, cuz really, the issue should be between mother and son but not everyone is matured enough to hold that kind of discussion with their mom while still putting you into consideration.

Most will get so pissed and in the process of speaking to their mom, will aggravate the issue and cause enmity between you and her. It's an ego thing for a lot of guys and I really do not blame them.

If you think your fiancé is matured enough, in a gentle and loving manner, bring up the issue with him and let him realize the way he handles the issue could make or mar the relationship between yourself and his mom and in turn could affect the relationship between you and him. But whatever the case, pls don't mention the money she borrowed from your mom, that is too shameful and a deal-breaker anytime.

But if you think he can't handle it, pls don't tell him. The issue will spill itself out one day and you will explain to him you didn't know how to tell him without hurting his feelings. And concerning your MIL, say no to her nine times out of ten and give her occasionally only when you can afford it.

To discourage her, you could also tell her you are considering telling your fiancé (her son) to increase the money he gives to her as you can see that she is constantly in need of more money. Tell her you cannot hold the sight of her asking for money every time (it breaks your heart sef) and you think her son should know about it. Make the discussion about her and how you just want to improve her life with the discussion. She will either say no and minimize how she begs you for money or tell you to go ahead and you can use the opportunity to lovingly and gently tell your fiancé about it.

modath:
@sayoberry,
Iya Edunjobi,iya ejire Oyila... E hug, , no advise but to just say God bless all of you..... once babies already master dem mama face & begin to cling, na either of two things carry them or watch them cry, I can't do the latter, so..... E- hug again....

@proudmom38,
Owo meta loke f'eyan kan... bobo proudy mi nko? .

@kimoni, @lovinam @zaynie @Megilicious @tchwinnie @missmalachi @chinwendym @onegai @Mytestimony @mgeey @Doubledouble @safe06, @Hafsat24 @tikosdear, @kaffy4bill any mama i miss, its not disregard ooo, na names pass me...

How are we all doing, God bless us all.

Modath mi owon

How u doing babes? How's LBK? Gbogbo ile nko? I dey try level ground small small for hia oo

Kisses to everyone at home. Give LBK double portion

@nursekaffy - it's hard keeping up now but i read somewhere you started a maternity home. Waoh! Congrats mama. Very soon, you will go Plc, go international oooo. Iseeeee

On my Bronx RIP angel

It's not about your cousin, it's about the new baby, a new life is a miracle which is ALWAYS worth celebrating.

scantee:
@all thanks you all for ur advice more especially those that pleaded i trade with caution. @Guys out there, sincerely lets not be so fast in condeming every gal out there, there still many gals with virtue and tru love, i am glad i have one. I tender an unreserve apology to any person/persons whom my thread/comments might have offended in one way or the other. I have learnt not to be so fast in judging people without verifying. Funny enough the gal in question is a popular nairaland member whom if i reveal her moniker here u guys will be like "WAOO YOU" she has been reading this thread as a guest. Finally, to my Princess i am very sorry i doubted you faithfulnez/sincerelty. I promise you it will never happen again. UP NEXT OUR PRE TM/WD PICTURES WILL HIT FP SOON. Thank you all.

Well well well, wishing you the very best OP.

If you desire a peaceful married life devoid of heartaches and regrets, leave that guy and find someone who can control his emotions. These attitude of his will only get worse after marriage.

You also need to ask yourself what exactly you want in a man and the type of family you want to build. Let these answers guide you to your real man.

Idowuogbo - naaaaa I won't. Anyone who can't fight you with his/her true moniker is not even worth the air he/she is breathing. Learnt that from Timbuktu

Bellong - boss, I checked, didn't see your summons.

crackhaus:
My response and proposal does not count as compliance?

**wider yawn**

sayoberry:
I usually prepare room temperature milk for the twins. (sometimes when I make d milk, they don't drink) plus they got used to it from rushing to make food for them.

But most times, I'm too tired to hold a baby and bottle. I just carry d baby, chook brest and sleep off. Or sleep without a top on. So they just find their way to the food source #lazyTiredMom

Hahahahaha sleep without a top on so they can serve themselves Na buffet ni?

I prepare hot so it will be warm/cool by the time he's drinking it. He drinks it hours later, sometimes sef, early morning.

opella:
Thanks so much dear, will definitely try it out.

I also pray he likes this "coup" you want to attempt

**hugz**

opella:
Thanks dear, please one more question, do you prepare the formula when he wakes, or you prepare and keep?

No, I prepare it very hot before I go to bed. That's like 11pm or 12am. I use the big Tommie tipppee bottle and store in a handy food warmer or I wrap it in some very thick clothes, it's sometimes more effective than the warmer.

crackhaus:
Kimoni, you ran?

not even a single compliance


**yawns**

opella:
please mamas i have some questions to ask
1) How do/did you cope with midnight feeding of your LO? My DS keeps waking up in the night to feed, i want to wean him next month, how do i manage the night feeding?
2) can i give him biscuit? he is 9 months +

Cc Kimoni

My DS too wakes up like twice or thrice every night but I have a bottle of formula ready to give him cuz he stopped bf a long time ago. Each feeding process is usually about 5 -10 mins so it's bearable for me as I just tuck the bottle in his mouth. But what I also observe is that sometimes it's not really food he wants, he probably woke up due to some other reasons and needs only petting to get back to sleep. So before i feed him, I try to pet him back to sleep before introducing the bottle.

2)Sure, but avoid the one with lots of sugar and icing. Crackers work well for me.

We have been together since 2013 to date, we have shared a good time and fund memories, i truely love her and she does too, i have tried my best to make her comfortable and take care of her and make her envy of all her female friends, i have NEVER cheated on her or have the thought of doing so despite we only see during end of every semester, and i traveled a lot and always busy with work though i make sure i do speak with her at least 3x a day with minimum of 30mins per a call just to make sure she don't feel lonely.

Can somebody explain the bolded? Why do guys do this in a relationship? I will never understand the rationale behind why guys treat girls like they are potential gold diggers? It's almost like you are competing with the imaginary aristos in her life.

I don't know if your girl is cheating on you but the foundation of your relationship with her is very superficial and may not survive tough times which, unfortunately, is an unavoidable element in a marriage. Why must she be the envy of all her female friends just because she is dating you? Are you her father

Let a girl love you for you and not what you can provide for her. Stop trying to buy her love just because you can afford it.

Timbuktou:
Shes probably looking for tips on which to buy as gifts.

coogar:
hehe!
kimoni wan use style collect free advice.

like play like play, no man supported these worthy survivors of prostrate cancer

Meanwhile, see our ladies represented yesterday:

https://www.nairaland.com/2663244/nobraday-braless-photos-nigerian-celebrities

coogar:
better hop to romance section.....
no one wears boxers here....strictly y-fronts!

coogar:
i am starting to suspect kimoni.

what do you want with men's boxers?

Just comply

It's for a worthy cause

thorpido:
Erm bia,what is that?

Lol...never mind. It's cob already

raumdeuter:
I thought it was only Nigerian and African men

Hahahahha nice one!

It's 4pm and nobody has complied ooo

Thorpido, u want to go first?

TV01:
Hi Tallesty,

I'm going to have to call you out on this one - it's somewhere between deeply flawed and utter tosh !

All you've done is blame men for womens behaviour . Helping no one, and at best and ascribing women with reduced responsibility, that is, you've infantalised them.

I wouldn't have been so concerned, but you are stressing the spiritual - Christian - element. The bible is clear, that a husbands failings do not give the wife recourse to disobedience or otherwise being antagonistic.

And although leaders serve, they are not servants in the sense that that is the whole of their remit. Another classic error knowingly or unknowingly promulgated by many which is coloured by feminist - in and out of church sadly.

There's more to debunk in your post, but I'll stop there. Happy to provide more depth on any of the points.


Consulting pastor over and above, or and without your husbands leave, is rebelliousness. Any pastor that tries that with me better lace up
What would my wife even be thinking?

TV

TV, If the OP has blamed husbands for their wifes' behavior, it's because a lot of responsibility, expectations and accountability comes with leadership. The man clearly has to lead aright. But in all, OP has been very detailed in explaining his reasons.

Now compare to this thread-

https://www.nairaland.com/2661461/tips-saving-drowning-marriage-woman

pickabeau1:
Kimoni

You should have put this in the boys room

However ladies furst

I did not see any pics of you ladies

Pick, it's no longer news that the sight of the female boobs has been bastardized. Even you can count how many pics of bare boobs we've seen on this section alone. Its soo bad that even playboy magazine, the "pioneers" of female nudit.y now think a female body has lost its commercial value whatever that means sha) and are now doing away with nud.ity. Read below:

For a generation of American men, reading Playboy was a cultural rite, an illicit thrill consumed by flashlight. Now every teenage boy has an Internet-connected phone instead. Pornographic magazines, even those as storied as Playboy, have lost their shock value, their commercial value and their cultural relevance.

In August of last year, its website dispensed with nudity. As a result, Playboy executives said, the average age of its reader dropped from 47 to just over 30, and[b] its web traffic jumped to about 16 million from about four million unique users per month[/b].

Link:
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/10/13/business/media/nudes-are-old-news-at-playboy.html?_r=0


So Pick, ladies have shown and over-shown what you are asking for. Let's not derail, who is going first? #noboxersday

This thread on FP is hilarious

https://www.nairaland.com/2663660/noboxersday-nigerians-react-nobraday

Ngwanu, gentlemen, can we see your pics of #noboxersday in honor of those who survived prostrate cancer. Remember this is a worthy cause and it demonstrates gender equality.

Coogar, r231, RR, raumdeuter, Tim, Pickabeau1, Sagamite, anonimus, Crackhaus, apextitan, (TV01 ) and my other able gentlemen...the floor is all yours



Only my boss, the chief priest @bellong is exempted. Thunder will strike 3 times if he complies

This thread on FP is hilarious

https://www.nairaland.com/2663660/noboxersday-nigerians-react-nobraday

Ngwanu, gentlemen, can we see your pics of #noboxersday in honor of those who survived prostrate cancer. Remember this is a worthy cause and it demonstrates gender equality.

Coogar, r231, RR, raumdeuter, Tim, Pickabeau1, Sagamite, anonimus, Crackhaus, apextitan, (TV01 ) and my other able gentlemen...the floor is all yours



Only my boss, the chief priest @bellong is exempted. Thunder will strike 3 times if he complies

Hahahahha

Oya naa, let us see men without boxers like we saw ladies without bras yesterday.