₦airaland Forum

mariiage is for most women what they want - depends on the friends you keep from childhood and the house you were raised in and also the amount of responsibility you have from your family

being form a single mother home - my mum taught me - education first, marriage and then together you can work on careers and children - so through out my childhood - i had books on my mind - until i had my second degree! and yet i am still thinking of a phd - but marriage creeps into my mind more often the older i have gotten esp when i see cute little babies (i'm a sucker for babies)

get the test done

you said she was cheating on you right up when you 2 made love - was it a sexual thing with this other guy? or was there more?
i know she was not supposed to - but if you can look beyond this and forgive her then find out why she did it. it may help in yourr/ship or the next one you get into

good luck

some women too dey try ohh~~

you need to grow up - decide what you want and then see of all these girls chasing you have what it is that you want. sometimes 1+1 really does equal 2 its that easy

just be yourself - he will notice you and if he likes what he sees, he will stick around whether the sex is good or bad (well at least long enough to work through any problems together)

dont assume and presume things you are not even sure of - you haven't know him long wnough to be making an 'educational guess'

it could be that carrying on with the pregnancy puts her at risk of dying - it could be the baby has a slim chance of fully developing.

it could be the baby has been severely brain damaged or physiologically impaired for any number of reasons!

it could even be the contraception she took caused some form of malformation! - as no contraception is 100% baby proof

@chuck - what if the baby was aborted for medical reasons?

sweetpain:
I can tell you are one babe who has sth to offer.

taking that positively and not sarcastically (thank you) - Yes i do believe i have alot to offer - now as i go through life, i believe i will meet ppl whom i complement and others whom i don't fit into so well - i will accept it and move on.
it doesn't make me any less of a person, neither does it make them any more/less of a person either.

not everyone was meant to appreciate what i have to offer and i believe i will find someone who believes in me and what i have to offer - i mean even Hitler had something to offer!!

how many irresponsible men are the cause of aborted babies?

like ppl here have said - love her present and plan to be part of her future if you still want her in your life

sweetpain:
Sex is an activity to be mutually enjoyed by both. Its a pity some (esp) girls feel used afterward. To me its all a function of mindset and orientation.But guys should be wary of girls like these because they usually expect some kind of compensation or reward after the act. Many of them will carry this attitude into marriage to exploit weak brothers.

Girls like who? me? - girls that know how to say NO and feel they would only sleep with men they want to? girls who think they do not always have to be victims of the man and his 'games'
Girls who think it is enough that we decide to have sex with a man, he is not taking - we are both giving each other something

sweetpain:
Luxoire, what kind of sister are you. Do you expect some kind of reward or you consider the act itself good enough.

i am the kind of sister that believes i have more control over my body and my actions than some other sisters are willing to take responsibility for!
I am the kind of sister that will just as readily put doubts in a guy's mind of who was really 'using' who in a relationship if that question ever arose! - the act itself is good enough, i expect no 'reward' afterwards - but the guy shouldn't always be made to feel like a 'hero' because he had sex with a girl - all of a sudden she is made to feel like the victim - when they has consetual adult intercourse

if some ppl are happy to cry foul and act the victim all the time, then hey - that's their  cuppa - as far as i am concerned - in most scenarios, ppl only have the power over you that you let them believe they do

@poster - sorry - all of this is by the way and a bit off the topic - SORRY

iice:
[color=#9900ff]Exactly.[/color]

sweet as always

charles316:
my dear,sexist.do u understand english?answer d question or u go start ur own thread-

Can You Date A guy That Has Nothing To Offer?

idiot
abi o?i like those kind of girls o.i bet that 88% of naija babes fall into dis category.they sha have atm for receiving koboko
story

if you had bothered reading previous replies you would have seen that i had already answered the topic question - and was just replying to comment (wonder who's the idiot now!! )

why do ppl UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF DIALOGUE AND THE ELEMENT OF SURPRISE - straight up ask the guy the details of the person named 'sweet heart'' on his phone - any guy who thinks he is dating a girl he is proud of and wants to settle with, will give you her details with so much pride - esp as u don dey pally am - he will tell you how they met, when, where, ho long its been going on, when he proposed (if it has gtten that far) - ALL YOU GOT TO DO IS ASK! dont be a chicken - you are in a good position because you have all the cards both of them have none

and if you ask the lady sh ewill deny it obviosuly - be wise and use this to your advantage

sweetpain:
A girl may have nothing to offer.But any smart guy will always have something to take.

as long as you're nto reffering to sex here, then its OK.
Woment need to take more control of their lives and their bodies - mean don't TAKE sex, we OFFER it to them - we willingly GIVE it to them. the only women from which sex is taken, are those that are rapped.

maybe if we women changed our attitudes and start being more in control of our sexuality, what we want, who we want, we wouldnt complain so much and feel used and abused

nope it doesnt feel empty because most guys / men engagaing in such activities are so shallow there is no emotional hole / depth in them to fill

JJYOU:
thanks for being a great human being. i like your type of maturity.

you're welcome - i hope the poster is able to find some form of solution on here tat will see him though

i think it works both ways - women will not want a man that has nothing to offer them, so why expect the guys to do that?

hmmmm - i know i have typos but you could've atleast used the spellchecker on here!!

believing in love does not make you an expert - in fact, it does not even mean you know how to EXPRESS LOVE - maybe the girls dont see you showing all this love that is inside you.

even if the guy annoyed her - does that mean she should clam up? how is he supposed to know he has offended her and ask for her forgiveness - how is he supposed to make it better and make it up to her if she won't talk to him?

to me it seems this guy is at a dead end!!

IF SHE WON'T TALK TO YOU, I SUGGEST YOU MAKE HER TALK - HOw? do the things she doesnt want you to do? open her mail, answer her phone - not because you don't trust her, but just to get some sort fo reaction form her - bottom line, you too start making life a bit difficult for her, it seems till now you have danced to her tune - about time you disturb the status quo - now i am one of those ppl who thinks couples should respect each other's privacy. however, it shouldnt be a taboo! open her mail, that will make her angry and usually when ppl get angry, they lash out and start saying things they REALLY mean, then everything will be out in the open.

All you need to do is get past this brick wall - pray about it. But if she can open up and say she is tired and wants out, then you know where you stand. the most frustrating part i think, is not knowing where you stand and whether or not she is even willing to make things work anymore.

No worry mydear, God dey! - just pray for a break through - and i am sure you have learnt and will pass on to your kids and firends the importance of dating / knowing someone fully before committing the rest of your life to them

sacrifice get levels

and it is easier when you know - if the shoe were on the other foot they'd do same or more for you - sometimes ppl are reluctant to sacrifice cos they know thier partner either will not appreicate it or probably hasn't / wouldn't do same to make the r/ship work

hmmm na wah ohhh - he may want to do it - and she may not want to watch it - i beg ppl should consider their partner's likely reactions before nursing certain fantasies

at best - discipline yourself and your mind!

to my reply you said 'talk is cheap' the alternative to thjat would be 'expensive action' so i asked how you want me to portray that in this virtual world - as talk is all we have online

what 'expensive' action do you require in this virtual world?

@patwhizzy

was that for me? - or did you just feel the need to make that statement generally?

love will NOT pay my bills
love will NOT feed my children
love will NOT make my house cleaner
love will NOT make you a good husband and father
love will NOT make you a provider and protector

love WILL keep me warm at night and make me feel secure - but how long does the nigth last before daylight bring reality?

i will marry someone i can work with, grow with, build with - someone God fearing who will respect me and be a positive role model for my kids - someone who sees me as partner and respects my opinion, ahardworking ambitious man - and then ultimately someone who loves me

so LOVE is not the ONLY inregredient and i dare say not the MOST IMPORTANT - SECURITY is the most important ingredient in marriage, but love comes close

Justosaus:
What is wrong with having another girlfriend? After all, we are not married.

as long as you dont mind her having another boyfriend ?

and you both understand yourselves like that - then hey - theres nothing wrong with it if you both want to hide your promiscuity under the umbrella of having a 'girlfriend or boyfriend'

manoy:
@ Luxiore,u too dey talk

my belle no be store my dear - make i tok am as i see am abi?

fyne ppl tent to have wowo friends that will make them feel good about their fyness

lol - woner what this says about you?

as for your friend - make she go baba - make him help her!!

@Poster - are you God when you want make pessin FEAR you? - why would you want your PARTNER to fear you? - no mak eme vex here - cos i dislike those kind of men

Respect - there are 2 things -
1. she doesnt love you enough to accord you the respect you deserve as the man in her life - have you told her how you feel?
2. you are from different tribes and the meaning of respect to you (e.g kneeling down to greet you) may not be what she sees as respect - are your expectations too unrealistic given the situation at hand? if they are and you know she was not brought up to give respect like what you are expecting or what you saw your mum and dad give each other then take this to account

bottom line TALK TO HER - her reply and the general tone/ direction of the chat will let you know WHY she is behaving thisbway and you can deal with it then.


LOOK FOR A CAUSE, BEFORE YOU SEEK THE SOLUTION

he may be waiting for THE ONE - strange as this may sound there are still a few good men out there that still believe in no sex before marriage and will stick to it
you cant miss what you dont know - right?!!

OR he may just have a prob in his down below!

@topup - well say

@poster - look hun - what do you want?? - i have never given any guy a second chance and i don't intend to - that is why i try to give a r/ship 200% - infact more often than not - i am the one who gets dumped - so no way in hell he is coming back wanting to lick his vomit and thinks i will take him back - arrant nonsense

cut off from those guys and move on - take time out and do what you want - change your number if need be, but you have to be hard on them to be kind on yourself - having them clouding your mind and phone doesnt help - so tell them to butt off - take a break and assess what you want from a relationship and marriage. Pray and choose a guy that you think will give you those things and give him 200% to make it work

Who said God no dey?