₦airaland Forum

Nice prayer. Hopefully our prayers will begin to translate into action as well. God has blessed Nigeria beyond our imagination and its high time we begin to live up to our potential.

First and foremost, i think it is unfair to generalize about anything and that includes pentecostal churches. I am not a fan of most pentecostal churches but there are very few good ones out there.

That being said, i attend an evangelical church (ECWA), and the particular one i go to care for their members. They announce illnesses, robberies or other misfortunes, deaths and even death of a church members family member who do not attend the church (e.g mother, father etc). This is a church with a congregation of over 700 people. Granted its not as much as most present day pentecostal churches, but it is still a significant number. One pentecostal church that i have attended that seems to do well also is Assemblies of God's church. The two branches i attended regularly when i moved away from home were also very caring and would help members who were struggling, sick or experiencing some kind of loss.

Real churches and pastors understand that God has called us to love one another, and failure to comply exposes fake churches for what they really are. Money making industries. My 2 cents

Why should it ever be acceptable? People need to learn discipline and self control. Add honesty and faithfulness to that list. My take is if you cannot be faithful in a relationship, then don't get into one. That is except of course both parties are birds of the same feather

I think this product has been on the market for sometime. It is a convertible laptop, atleast that is how it is being advertised here in the US. It comes with a detachable keyboard and has both a tablet and laptop mode and function.

Taking its functions into account, i doubt this is geared towards being an ipad competitor, i think it was made to provide dual functionality for people who want both products but dont want them separately.

The babe no try at all. That one na last grade behavior. So of all the men in the world, na your brother she see to knack.

Ehm, poster, your twin brother rough gaan o. Himself, of all the babes wey de this planet, na your ex babe the guy see to knack. If this is true, he should really be ashamed, and i personally wont trust anyone who can do such to me regardless of whether it is a twin brother or a friend. That is just low.

I am even more surprised that most people missed the fact that his twin brother slept with the babe. With friends and family like these, who needs enemies? True talk o

donlyone: Are you saying once a person is honest they can never yield to temptation?

An honest person who thinks he/she is beyond falling will inevitably fall.

There is no excuse for infidelity,yes.

But no matter how honest and faithful you are and have been, you best flee from temptation, many have fallen who are better than you.

Believe me, stranger things have happened.

Guy, na God de help person o. in order to do what is right, you must be a person who consistently keeps God at the center. If you noticed, i said that an honest person will take himself/herself out of the situation, regardless of their faith. That i think speaks to fleeing temptation. I think that part of remaining faithful to one's partner involves laying boundaries and ensuring that anything that can tempt is kept far away from the person. To make excuses for someones misbehavior is just low. Rather let us be honest with them and let them know that God has not only given us the ability to practice self control, we are very capable of saying no to wrong doings.

@OP, i try not to comment here on Nairaland, but i logged in just to tell you that this is pure bullshit.

People who cheat (women and men)make a conscious decision to do so. The emotional and sometimes physical scars felt by those cheated on run deep, that i find your useless theory insulting to their intelligence.

If people who cheat find themselves in an uncomfortable position, if they have any integrity, the will walk away or take themselves out of it. That is what honest people do. So sit down there and make excuses for people who are dishonest and unfaithful, and of course blame the victim of such actions.

Get yourself educated and i hope you can grow some sense cos making excuses for dishonest people is Bullshit.

[quote author=babyosisi][/quote]I dont want to derail the thread, especially since this is about the loss of a loved one for some people, but i do see what you are saying and agree with you to a certain degree. I live in the US as well, and my problem with speech here is that there is so much of a push for Political Correct speech at the detriment of honest engagement. Of course there is the other extreme in Naija of speaking bluntly and unreflectively sometimes. In terms of the word corpse, well i watch alot of forensic related stuff, and so the word corpse is used in media reports pertaining to such. Maybe not so much in mainstream news. We can talk about this a little further if you like, but not on this thread. PM me or something

In any case lets us not derail the thread. A father, son, nephew and friend has been lost by several families. May God comfort them.

Good talk Babyosisi

babyosisi: [size=18pt]Why do Nigerians write and speak in such colloquial manner ?

In response to your post :-)

A body refers to the material organism of an individual, human or animal, living or dead. Corpse is accurate because it specifies that the body is dead. The term "corpse" is often used to show that the body is being prepared for burial. We can also use the phrase "dead body", but why use two words where one will suffice? Except your gripe is with the word corpse, which i dare say is used in the media in the States as well.

While i think that it is good for people to speak well regardless of where they are from, i think that this post was unnecessary in the given context and the use of the term corpse was not in any way disrespectful to Yakowa. My 2 kobo

May the souls of the departed rest in peace.

Haha, love this. This is what our Nigerian professors and everybody who has a brain in the country ought to be doing. Challenging the statuesque. Yet anyone that mentions that things arent working here on nairaland, its insult upon insult. Shey now that other African countries are beginning to break it down for us, shame go catch us small.

Like i said on a previous thread yesterday, i am sure GEJ is a decent guy, but he makes a bad president. I take issue with him accepting an office in which he clearly knows that he is incapable of delivering results. Ruling an entire country is not something you gamble with. There are too many lives at stake for such incompetence.

Let the insults begin

you can rent a new wedding gown by the way. Not all rented wedding gowns are pre-worn. Also it is sometimes more expensive to rent a gown so cost is not the only reason people rent. For me i just dont want to deal with all the wahala that comes with preserving the gown after the wedding. Besides its just for one day.

DEfinitely rent. Its just for one day and i can only wear it once

sometimes when i read the comments on nairaland, i dont know whether to be angry at the dysfunctional government we have in place, or the minds and attitude of the people that continue to celebrate mediocrity. I am sure GEJ is a nice guy, but the truth he is not doing a good job of ruling this country. People are dying daily and he is here telling us story. The country is at one of the worst state it has ever been in, and all we are hearing is stories with no defined plans as to how to make things better. No goal is ever achieved without a plan.

Ezeufi: All the thieves in retardeen government have short, "responsible looking hair". All big time criminals of every political persuasion in nigeria have this short hair. Yet some goats relate responsibility of a man to the length of his hair. This intellectual lazyness of not being able to see the intrinsic nature of an individual's character, but summing them up by the external look of their appearances is another reason why this country is in the mess. I would rather trust a dreadlocked responsible person than a "responsible looking", short haired pastor.

Haha as much as i see where you are coming from, you still cannot change the fact that we are judged by our looks for the most part. For instance if you have a business board meeting, and a lady wearing a very short mini skirt and boob tube walks in with excessive make up, tell me that your first thought will be, aah see my business partner and that you will gladly introduce her to other board members? :-). Same goes for a scruffy guy walking into a business meeting looking all haired up...lol...

I am not saying that such people cannot be responsible or even intellectually sound, but we really are judged by the way we look. By the way your claim that such intellectual laziness happens only in Nigeria is false. In the US, UK or anywhere in the world, people are judged based on first appearance. I know people who did not get jobs they were qualified for because they had tattoos or piercings and stuff. On a professional level those are acceptable if you are going into an industry where such are accepted. In an ideal world, people should not be judged on first appearance, unfortunately that is not the case, and i doubt that you can claim that you have never done that before. IF you havent, then u must be a saint

[quote author=Sagamite][/quote]Haha @ sagamite, very good info. I like how you went all indepth with food GI's and such. You think say naija people send all that info? Just tell them how it translates into weightloss for them, thats all they want to hear. Although i agree you can lose weight without exercise, the truth is you are going to get there faster with exercise and you also dont get a nice, toned body with diet alone. You have to push some metal and a good doe of cardio too. Tell babes to lift weights, dem go run cos they think it will make them bulky which isnt necessarily true.

@ OP you have some good info here on weightloss, the rest is up to you

Guys underestimate the power of a clean shaven look. there is nothing sexier than a guy on low cut who is clean shaven. Ileke Idi i am with you on this one

@ OP if you skip meals and go on salt flush diets and such, you will not be helping yourself in the long run. Health complications can arise from such restrictive diets such as gallstone and even sometimes organ failure due to lack of proper nourishment. Remember that in such instances, your body feeds on not just fat but muscle to compensate for lack of calories. Did you know that your heart is also made up of muscle? just putting that out there

Once again eat well and exercise. Cut out soda and sugared drinks and drink water only. Cut down on starchy carbs, fried foods and oily foods. Also reduce intake of baked goods and eat clean, meaning more fruits and veggies and the weight will come off. Do not starve yourself or under eat, you will gain weight that way. The weight will come off initially, but once you start to eat again, it will come back with a vengeance. Also one reason why i suggest reducing the intake of the above mentioned foods and not completely cutting them out is because you want something that is sustainable. You will always eat rice and other carbs, so rather than cut them out altogether, reduce how much you eat them and replace them with veggies and fruits. Once again weightloss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. slow and steady wins this particular race o

In trying to lose weight, these are the things that i have found to be helpful and it has worked for me, hope they work for you too. Good luck

weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. Eat a healthy diet, meaning add more fruits and veggies to your meals and reduce rice, pasta and all the other starchy intakes. Also reduce the amount of oil and fried stuff in your food. Also try to walk/run for atleast 30 minutes daily. And this is all just beginning o, after you get used to being active, you have to amp up your workouts.

The only way you are going to lose weight drastically in 20 days is to starve yourself. What happens is you will lose mostly water weight and some muscles and a little fat. But as soon as you start to eat, most or all the weight will come back. Slow and steady is the best way to lose weight.

Good luck

When there is no security in the country, why should i rejoice that Brazilians are visiting. Go and tell the people that have lost loved ones in the various Boko Haram bombings and various crisis that we are receiving Brazilian delegate and see if you wont get a resounding slap. Please GEJ should focus on ensuring the safety and security of lives and property in the country. Security should be a major priority in the country now. Imagine the countless lives that have been lost since 2010; what has been done to curtail the Boko Haram menace? NOTHING but empty promises.

I am leaning more to the side that this babe doesnt love you, if she did you wont have to manipulate or even give her a reason to call you. While giving her space to miss you and call you on her own is not a bad idea, in a relationship as new as yours (4 months) i see no reason why this should already be happening. The fact that you already did not call for a week and all she did was complain when you eventually did tells me that she either doesnt love you or she is seeing someone else. In your shoes, i will walk away and find someone else that appreciates me.

bittyend: Shut it, woman

Let them kill one another.

Let who fight it out? Rather than assert yourself here on Nairaland, go and join the fight in the North or even better, live there if you dare. After you have contributed your share, i will gladly shut up and listen to you. Until then, please speak intelligently, proffer a solution or take your own advice and shut up

For those of you advocating reprisal attacks, its so easy for you to do because you have not lost a loved one to the violence. Go and see what reprisal attacks has done to innocent people in Jos where i grew up. Reprisal attacks is what caused the death of over 400 innocent women and children in dogo nahawa and a fulani settlement. Rather than advocate more violence, we really need to think about a way to go beyond violence. IT is really hard to sit down and see boko haram waste human lives, but reprisal attacks is not the answer. I have seen people slaughtered and burnt alive for no reason except the fact that they belong to a certain religion and were passing through enemy territory when the crisis started. Areas which were otherwise safe on a peaceful day. I really hope and pray that a suitable solution can be met without further wasting innocent lives. May the souls of the innocent rest in peace

Wow, i cant tell your friend what to do cos this is huge and really sad. If she can live with this then she should go ahead with the marriage, but i know say me i go just waka. A man who is deceptive with something this huge can kill someone o, even if it is induced heart attack. May we not see such o.

Did someone still manage to blame the woman for this? Men nawa for una o, no matter what a man does wrong to the woman, it is always her fault. Talk about life being unfair

Methinks that though the man is the provider, God never intended that the women be gold diggers either. REad proverbs 31, it talks about the virtuous woman and clearly shows that she is just a s industrious as her man. The problem is when men meet women who are working and doing well, they get scared and insecure saying that she will be proud and unsubmissive (granted this is true is some cases but not all). they therefore end up settling for what i call chewing gum chicks or lazy women who want to be kept and then come on here to complain about it.

Morale of the story is that men should encourage their wives to better themselves and find something to do no matter how small. For instance my dad married my mum as a diploma holder, in 30 years she is an associate professor who has a law degree, a masters in info science and a Phd as well. My dad who is also in academia pushed her to go to school even when she didnt want to. Now she is proud of her accomplishments. It takes a confident and also God fearing man to pull his partner up, and it also takes a God fearing woman to not take advantage of such a good man. Guys shine your eye, if you marry nonsense, you have no one to blame but yourself.

A few more things, in Nigeria today, it is not weird to see the woman being the main source of income for the family, women have really stepped up to the plate and are providing and taking care of the home, while the man lazies around and spend her money or cheap babes. Also someone mentioned that women paying bills in naija is a foreign concept, once again i beg to differ, if you are dating a correct chick and not all these cheap and easy babes, you will definitely see that this is not the case. So once again if you want to enjoy the benefits of a mutually beneficial relationship in every sense, stop chasing cheap babes and find yourself a good hardworking woman with a good head on her shoulders.

I am sorry, but how do you start dating someone without knowing his surname first and foremost, and then his age? To make matters worse she slept with him without knowing these simple details. Shaking my head...what kind of relationship is your friend looking for, abi what do they talk about? do they even talk? She should free the guy cos this is such basic info, and he isnt willing to share, what about when it involves something serious?

cap28: There is a very big difference between being curvy and being fat - most of the women here are NOT curvy they are flat out fat and to make matters worse they are wearing clothes that expose the layers of flab on them instead of wearing clothes that draw attention away from the flab. Omotola claims to be curvy but is in fact fat, Ini Edo is fat, Monalisa Chinda is obese but continues to wear clothes which draw attention to her massive body, when you are fat you do not wear a billowing bright orange dress - she actually looks as if she is wearing a parachute (a very tight one) - its either you lose weight or wear clothes that hide the flab - you cant eat your cake and have it too.

That is why i said everyone should dress their bodies, abi? wear what is suitable and appropriate for your body type. Some of the slim ladies are not looking good either. i think that the type of clothes they are choosing are not flattering.

I dont know if i will call Omotola fat, she may look better toned (besides for a mother of 5, she hasnt done badly). Mind u some of these ladies are 5.8 5.9. you cannot expect them to have petit frames like some one who is shorter. And there are even shorter people who do not have petit frame. Using one yardstick as a measurement for all women's weight is wrong and this is not even done from a medical standpoint. A person who is 5.8 with a petit frame will look very different from someone of the same height who has a medium frame to a large frame. They will also all look different at the same weight due to body frame.

I still maintain that people should be fit and in good shape. However it is not mandatory or even healthy for everyone to be rake thin (it is healthy for some as this is their normal body type). However, one thing that we are in agreement on is that they should dress their body type

They said celebs, but not sure who half of these people are.

I think most of them would look nicer wearing styles sown with our beautiful traditional fabrics. for instance methinks Sasha's outfit was simple but still classy compared to some of the evening gowns these ladies are wearing. Fashion is such that adire and ankara can be used to even sew those styles. Another thing is these ladies need to learn to dress their body types. Just cos A wore something doesnt mean that B should wear it too

I have noticed a shift in what is considered beautiful in African setting. Unfortunately we are using the western ideal to judge our own African body which is an entirely different make up. Yes people should keep in shape and not be obese, but to insult someones appearance because they are curvy is just low. I think that if someone dresses appropriately for their body type then that person should be commended. After all we see much smaller people wearing stuff that does nothing to compliment their figures. Let us learn to respect and appreciate ourselves and our bodies, and stop imposing the ideals of other culture on our own.

@ OP well said. I have always said that Nigerians are part part of the problem. If we as individuals will show zero tolerance for wrong doing, we would solve our own problems. We really do need a reorientation where things are done following due process and the law and not sentiments. I also have great respect for those who admitted that doing the right thing is hard when the perpetrator is a family member and would rather resign. Let us try to be upright in our dealing with others. If integrity is not a policy we practice in our personal lives, it wont be any different when we get to public office.

[quote author=coogar]a certain jmoore believes the baby must live regardless of
how it was conceived. someone also said it's not an
accident. it was pre-destined that she would get
[color=#000000]r[/color]aped.

It is so easy for people who have not been raped to dismiss the gravity of such situation. Infact in Nigeria, if you are not careful, you would be accused of bringing the misfortune on yourself in addition to the stigma. This is the reason why rape victims do not come forward. To now have a baby, another human being you did not plan, you do not know the father, sexual relations wasnt consensual...to have all that accompany the baby...its too much for any human being to carry.

Some people are strong emotionally and can handle it, others cannot, and i think that those ladies should be allowed to abort the baby because it affects her health psychologically. By the way, i am not speaking from experience o, but a friend of mine had to deal with this and it was heart breaking to watch

davidylan: At 18? She can only make such a decision if she is clothing herself, feeding herself, has her own house and husband. As long as i am still responsible for school fees, food and co... she is not carrying another man's wahala.
Once a woman has a child outside wedlock, her chances of marrying a decent, hardworking, responsible dude automatically drops by more than 90% while mr. bobo can go on with his life as if nothing happened. My daughter should not be another man's used spare part abeg.

Although Davidylan sounds really harsh, atleast he has the guts to be honest about his thoughts towards this issue. Alot of people are quick to shout against abortion, but when found in the situation are very quick to do it. As for me i think that abortion is wrong, better still avoid fornicating all together to avoid such wahala. It is not easy for single mothers anywhere in the world, not to talk of teenagers who are not ready for such responsibility. The children also suffer especially in a place like Nigeria where he/she will be reminded that they were born out of wedlock.

I agree that teenage mothers should not be treated poorly or inhumanely, but i think the emphasis should be on prevention rather than tolerance of immoral behavior. Once these kids know that they can get away with it, what stops them from having another one. In the united states, you see young girls below 21 already having 2 kids and are on welfare or some kind of assistance.

As for the prolife/prochoice debate. I am prolife, but i also believe that women should be given a choice especially in despoil and molestation cases. It is not easy to have a kid born out of such circumstances because they will always be a reminder. For some the experience alone is traumatic, then to have a child come out of that, double wahala.

On another note,I see guys calling girls useless for getting pregnant, please get off your high horse. It takes two to tango. Was it not a man that put it there? bloody hypocrites. Women are always blamed for everything, including things that men are responsible for or are a partaker of...

Mitofag, except you know Onwunliri personally and engaged in corrupt practices with him, i suggest you stop speaking ill of the dead. I grew up with this man's kids in unijos and they seemed to be decent people and never hurt anybody. This is a sad day indeed for Nigeria, losing 150 people including whole families. May they all rest in peace.