₦airaland Forum

Capital No

The only person that should move into your house @35 is ur wife, time no dey again start working to make that happen soonest, u need to start your own family ASAP.

As for ur elder sister let them remain where they are n send them money as often as u can afford. Also let her start sth to support her family biko rather than depending on you.

She should be arrested already

Confidant010:
I met this babe in 2017 while in school. She was in Diploma program then and I was in my final in degree program.
Initially, she pretended to be everything any man would wish in a woman; obedient, submissive, helpful in house chores, etc.

I left for my national youth service the following year and I have been supportive through her thick n thorn with the resources at my disposal. Sending her cash for upkeep, supporting her during her dad's burial, sending cash to her mum occasionally, paying her dept without her notice, etc.
If am to take into account all that I have spent from her since 2017-date, 300k wouldn't be an exaggeration.

Recently, having helped her in Jamb to get admission into a degree program on scholarship, while I am in Lagos, trying to build myself. The girl is completely a different human being entirely. She openly tells me countlessly that the cash I give to her now isn't enough for her, that her ex boyfriend she dated used to give her more. Last month I sent her 6k, I was really stressed financially, when we had issues, she told me not to stress her bc of ordinary 6K. She flares over very minor misunderstanding.

Please what should I do guys?
She's planning visiting me next month.
I'm very confused bc I really love her.
Pls mature minds only.
Your input will be of help.
Thanks guys.

ur tenure is coming to an end soon.

A new guy is around

The love is not mutual she is just using you.

Usmankno:
This room is not worth 10k..Did u check the room before lodge nd payment?

Exactly na 3.5k

vigoj:
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Call/WhatsApp:

Do u have the one that can charge laptop

Make it or die trying, giving up is not an option.

Get up and fight on

The letter should be addressed to the Vice chancellor

Then CC
1. Pro chancellor
2. Chancellor
3. Dean students affairs
4. NANS

Except it's just a media trial that lacks substance/merits.

A good VC will set up a panel to unravel the truth

LM7 deserves it
See why

See the stats

nextBIGthing:
Good day everyone
I’m not good at writing so pls bear with me anyhow you see this.
I’m a young man 24yrs old and my girlfriend 22, I just finished my undergraduate studies and about going for Nysc, While my girl is still in school but she’s already into some online business making good and enough money for herself money that ordinarily she can use to start up a good life. She does not know how to spend which I have complained severally, I don’t really blame her due to the fact that she gets money at any given time she needs it. She can be paid 100k today and be broke in next 3 days calling me and disturbing me for recharge card and all sort of things she can actually do herself. I normally give this to her but it’s now becoming worse and unbearable no matter the amount she gets, she’ll spend it for you in less than one week with no reasonable thing to show for and you’ll be amazed.

To cut it all short, I’m still unemployed but I normally do some little jobs that brings me cash just change compared to what my girl makes in a month. Let me add that she’s a very supportive girl, helped me during my school when I had issues.

I’ve talked and talked now she tags me a nagging guy, and that I have poverty mentality by telling her to have some savings not for me but for herself

I’m just tried and cos she’s not changing keeps doing same thing
I’m even scared of taking the relationship to the next stage.
Cos if things fall out for her
I’ll be the one to take care of her excessive and exorbitant spendings. And I’m just a guy who’s starting life

Pls I need advise

U cant change a heavy spender no matter how hard u try.

It talks self discipline to deny oneself some gratification when u have money. Without financial self discipline there is nothing that will change.

Moreso if u marry her like dt u will be frustrated with her money habit

HBP is a silent killer.

It will kill silently check ur BP regularly

Searchingvictor:
This issue has been bothering me since. Like how does it become a crime? How's the society secure affected?


If husband and wife feels like selling their baby, how is it a crime?

Please, enlighten me

a child is a state own too not just for the parents. Every state or nation have laws governing it. Selling of human being is a crime.

Congratulations

But don't just stop at saving move a step further by investing.

Think land banking. Start looking for cheap lands in promising areas to buy n resale

Quarrelling and fighting

DamnnNiggarr:
Does Excessive Stressing Or Staying Away From Sex For Too Long, Causes Erectile Dysfunction?

I wanted to create a new moniker for this thread but later changed my mind in order to continue with this my main Monika, because I see no importance/reason for creating a new moniker. Please you guys should not insult nor comment negatively on this thread. I know that topics similar to this have been created on this forum but I really want an answer and also a special advice towards achieving a permanent solution. I've browsed the internet about it, but it seems most of the sites I visited were only interested on advertising their products.

Lately, I've been overstressing my self, I combine three things in a day which means combining studies, business and family which makes me to always be on the road every minute of the day, I shuttle between Anambra, Enugu and Bayelsa, most of the time, if I can't find some of the goods I'm looking for in Onitsha, I travel to Lagos or Aba to get them which will be way-billed to my wife in Bayelsa so that she can sale them, and all these make me to be away from home for too long especially my studies.

so, on 18-11-2021, I decided to visit home, it was the day that terrible accident occured at upper iweka, Onitsha. But I got home, and I observed that I can't have an erection, even if it manages to erect, I can't hold the erection for too long, this thing kept happening until my wife couldn't take it anymore and she suggested we see a doctor, on getting to the hospital, the doctor asked me what I do for a living (what I do in my every day life) and I told him, he also asked how often do I visit home, I told him that it takes longer period before I visit home. He suggested that I should get some rest and stay away from too much stress, and also visit home regularly in order to be having regular intimacy with my wife, because staying away for too long from it can also have a negative effect on sexual life. But I told him that, stressing my self is how I put food on my table and that's also how I've been able to pass my exams even right from my undergraduate days.

The doctor made mention of Stress, which I'm fully aware of it's negative effect on sexual health, but staying away from intimacy for too long, does that also cause erectile dysfunction? even the internet didn't mention anything concerning Staying Away from intimacy for too long. I know that most men are down with this particular issue but are too shy/ashame to speak up.

please Nairalanders, how else do I overcome this disgraceful and shameful predicament?
all advice would be highly appreciated.


lalasticlala Seun Sissy3 dominique

It can only cause pre mature ejaculation. Never erectile disfunction.

U get the best erection when you stay off sex for long though u will come very fast

FirefliesSun:
we have known each other for over 15 years.

Shut up and mind ur business

She has known her mother all of her life infact her mother brought her to this world

FirefliesSun:
I am so mad right now. I am so confused.
Today around 5:30, I had to visit my friend to pluck hibiscus flowers.

One thing led to another while at the flowers, I saw my friend's mother making eyes/wink and pouting to my friends husband. He just smiled back although he noticed I saw it but the mother didn't.

I can swear they are having a fling and it's shameful. I don't know how to tell her. I am just here, very confused and bothered. Even if I wanted to tell her, how do I even start?

Just shut up and mind ur business

backbencher:
He did say he is looking at postgraduate offers...which means he is planning to enter academia.

Post graduate offers means msc n PhD

It's still schooling not an employment yet

F9 parallel hmmm

How can anyone explain his recent result?

Anyway it doesn't mean anything in today Nigeria as he can end up as a POS agent.

Let him secure gainful employment first

hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

Nothing concrete yet

No prove or evidence of cheating just suspicions.

You will never catch her with ur attitude of showing her what you are up to.

Play cool or fool so she will put her guard down for u to catch her with solid prove.

Is she active on social media? U can woo her using another number on WhatsApp n watch her reaction.

In the mean time be acting loving and ignoring things n u will track her down soonest. The harsh n suspicious approach is a no no if u want to track her down

1Sharon:
What if he doesn't want anymore wives?
His marraige to Regina is still very young, I don't think he wants a new wife anytime soon.

Then again how do you think Ned's oldest wife is feeling?

Why should a woman want that for herself?

If you must be a 2nd wife, make sure you stand out.

Ned is a billionaire

If every wife gets 3m upkeep allowance monthly why will they not be happy more so when they can have affairs secretly

1Sharon:
What do you mean?

Youngest and freshest wife until Ned gets another wife.

1Sharon:
Nope. Regina has some advantage over her co-wives. She's the freshest and youngest.

Don't be surprised to know that Ned has forgotten his older wives.

If you want to be a co-wife, make sure you stand out, so you aren't forgotten.

As if she will be the last?

Candidlady:
Please I need a reason why any lady would agree to be a second wife?

Bc the man is rich (or at least comfortable n the lady is poor)

Ask Regina Daniels

She can even be 10th to a man of 70

All most women need is money

He should leave NPF and apply for lecturing jobs in universities/polytechnic

Ibegtodiffer:
As an Assistant Lecturer (joining the system with Masters degree), your Netpay is 118K.

After 35years service (Professor at bar), Netpay is 406k.

Very poor

A professor deserves at least 1m monthly

And assistant lecturer at least 350k monthly

Running a business is not easy n requires alot of self discipline.

Op I agree with u for the most part.

Child bearing alone will affect the biz

Shows who is in charge

She pays the bills for the house boy

So she calls the short

SuperStriker:
Good day everyone.
I don't want to cheat on my wife but she cannot cope with my demands for sex. She even told me to control myself and be more spiritual and I am wondering. If I am not controlling myself, I would have cheated on her long ago. I am a fine looking man with many opportunities to cheat. We only have sex when she's ready and wants it, anything outside that is excuse upon excuse. How can a woman I married be telling me to control myself?

Once a week should be okay

Control yourself

distinguish:
We have been married for a year now. We have been trying to conceive. Because of the emotional stress attached my wife said she can't be staying at home alone, it causes her stress. She said she wants to start doing something. At least a business.

I took a loan from my place of work and we started the business for over 2 months now. The issue now is that, I don't always have cash on me anymore. Any little money I got it's for the business. Basically, we mostly feed from the business.

Yesterday, after we returned home, she started giving me attitude, I asked her what the issue was, she started telling me how I am killing the business, not taking good care of her, not having money to take care of her and all sort of rubbish, she brought out how incompetent I am as a husband and what have you. I never said a word to reply her and its eating me up seriously, I could not sleep the whole night. This is the person that I sacrificed a lot for. I was supposed a take a professional course this November, but because of her I had to postpone it.

Please I need your advice.

PS: I did not eat the food she prepared last night.

Lol..

U are a learner in woman matters

A woman is interested in what u are doing now not what you have been doing.

Whatever you do never go broke except u want to see the worst

Denvacandy:
We got married in 2018 and things where going smooth, i was working with a company in port harcourt and i can bodly say i was very okay, taking flight is not an issue.

When she wanted to give birth to our first child, it was through CS and i paid every damn bills amounting to 500k or so.

We moved down to ogun state and i was taking flight monthly to see her from port harcourt.

Fast forward to 2020, the comapny fold up and i lost my job, i came down to ogun fully with my wife and everything went down, feeding was hard and my savings is drying up.

You know how woman do and how to satisfy them so my savings eventually dried up and the reality was down.

She applied for a teaching job at govt school and she got employed and i was always at home.

Do she was supportive but its didnt took long when she changed and started treating me badly.

I was so sad the day she utter all terirble words to me, on how have not been a good husband and how i have not been dropping money for food and co.

how i have not been taking care of her, i almost moved to tears and i refused to eat her food for some period, i was being supported by a street friend.

How can someone you have sacrificed so much for all of a sudden change and bring out thier true color.

Na normal thing
No woman loves a broke man (infact most human being don't)

If u had saved enough u could have started another biz by now. I noticed u were very wasteful while working taking flights anyhow and paying 500k for CS when govt hospital could have done same with less than 150k

Better look for sth doing ASAP no matter how small

MISSNORA:
Good evening all! Please i need mature replies on this topic. My elder brother is really hurting right now.

The Story.
My elder brother got married earlier this year...before the marriage, he was fully aware that his childhood friend[Michael] had dated his wife to be with sexx involved. The wife is the truthful type and lays everything bare. Michael is well aware that his ex [my elder Bros wife] is fully married to his friend[my brother]....My brothers wife and Michael recently reconnected again on social media and has since started up chats that "MAY" lead to them flirting. She shows my brother the chats and gives him every update. My brother is not happy with this development and is yet to communicate this to his wife.

Questions.
1...Should he tell the wife to block of Michael (his wife's ex, whom is coincidentally his childhood till date friend) ?is this a wise move considering the fact that this might make his wife start hiding stuffs
... The wife is cool with maintaining contact with this particular ex[Michael]....thought he tells my brother everything /the chats.
2....Can you allow ur spouse still in contacts with his/her ex?
3....Should my brother just talk to Michael straight up to stop chatting his wife?

He should calm down
Nothing new will happen that haven't happened before.
He should caution his wife to keep off Mike to avoid re bleeping her